Return of a Soldier (Soldier Series Romance Novellas) (4 page)

I laughed and Trent took my hand, his strong fingers wrapping around mine, and guided me to the door.  We walked across the front porch and then stepped down onto the soft, sandy ground, heading toward the lake.  The moonlight gleamed across the water, small ripples making it dance enticingly in the darkness.  There seemed to be a million stars out in the sky tonight.  Even though I lived in a small town and was sure that I could see more of the night sky than most people, it didn’t compare to being out here without any other light around.  I was certain stars I’d never even spotted before were out tonight.

“This is amazing,” I breathed, looking up in
amazement.

“I know,” Trent agreed in hushed tones.

We stood gazing up at the inky night sky for a moment, neither of us wanting to speak and break the magic spell.  Eventually Trent spread the blanket down on the soft ground, and I dropped my towel onto it.  He shrugged out of his sweater and pulled me to him as I shivered in the night air.  Goose bumps rippled across my flesh, and I wondered again how exactly he thought we’d keep warm swimming out here now.  “Come on,” he said, suddenly scooping me up into his arms.  Trent started walking hastily toward the water, and I clung to him, squealing.

“It’s going to be too cold!”

“Nah, it’ll feel great,” Trent said, grinning from ear to ear.  He stepped into the lake, and droplets of cool water sprayed up against my skin as he noisily splashed farther in.  He continued walking, until my feet were dipped in the chilly lake and I was clamoring to get out of his embrace.

“It’s freezing!”

Trent lowered his head and kissed me, and as his tongue gently pushed into my mouth, suddenly I wasn’t quite so aware of the cold water seeping over my entire body as he carried us deeper into the water.  I twisted in his arms, wrapping my legs around his waist, as Trent held me to him, kissing me intently in the darkness.  “See, it’s not bad once you’re in the lake,” he said, his voice deep, letting his fingers trail across my bare shoulders and back.  His fingers slid under the thin spaghetti strap of my bikini top, gently trailing back and forth, until at last he untied it with a single tug.  He reached up to untie the strings behind my neck as well, and palmed the skimpy top in one hand, lest it float away.

“
Mmmm, much better,” he said, gazing down at my bare breasts.  Releasing me ever so slightly from his embrace, he lowered me to the ground, so that we were both standing chest-deep in the water. His hands edging down over my bikini bottom, he cupped the curves of my backside with his hands, pulling me to him. He lowered his head and kissed each breast, sucking intently on my nipples and teasing them with his tongue.  I shivered slightly, both from the coolness of being in the lake and from his touch.

“Are you cold?” he asked, pulling me to him and wrapping his muscular arms around me.

“Yeah, let’s go back to the blanket.”

We walked back out of the lake together,
hurrying over to where we’d left our things.  I grabbed my towel, wrapping it around myself as I shivered in the cool night air.

“Here, put this on,” Trent said, handing me his sweater.
  I pulled it over my head as Trent tossed my wet bikini top to a corner of the blanket.  The sweater was way too big for me and hung down to mid-thigh, but it was warm and smelled like the spicy scent of Trent’s aftershave.  Nothing, however, could warm me up like the way he was looking at me right now.  He stepped closer and brushed my hair, now damp at the ends from our dip in the lake, back from my face and then cupped my cheek as he bent down for a kiss.  “God, you are so sexy,” he murmured.

“So are you,” I replied, kissing him back and running my fingers over the hard planes of his chest.  Moving my hands down his pectorals, I let my fingertips trail over his washboard abdomen, which was rippled with
solid muscles.

Trent
shifted and reached around me, one arm around my back and the other supporting my head, as he lowered me gently onto the blanket beneath us.  His body hovered above mine, and I could just make out the desire in his eyes in the moonlight.  A breeze blew off the lake, but with Trent sheltering me I barely noticed the cool nip of the night air anymore.  Trent’s lips were soon hot against mine.  His hands slid under the sweater and grazed across my stomach, and I felt a yearning sensation stirring inside of me.  Moving upwards, he eagerly cupped my breasts, caressing and squeezing them as he ran his thumbs back and forth across my tender nipples.

He lowered his mouth to my neck and then moved further down my body, kissing me tenderly across my stomach, just above my bikini bottoms.
  His fingers hooked beneath the stretchy fabric, and he tugged them down my legs.  I felt vulnerable and exposed out in the open like this, but I knew there was no one around to see us.  Even if there had been people staying in the other cabins, we were under the cover of darkness.

Trent seemed to sense that I had tensed up a bit, and he kissed his way back up my inner thigh.  “No one’s here but us,” he murmured.  “And I’ve been dying to taste you since I got back.”

I let out a small whimper as his mouth finally reached what he was seeking, and he kissed my tender folds.  His tongue expertly laved against my fleshy nub, sending waves of pleasure through me.  I cried out as I felt the heat building deep inside my core. I was powerless to resist Trent and knew that any moment I’d be spiraling out of control.  Only he could make me come so quickly and intensely, and just knowing what he was capable of was making me begin to orgasm faster than I ever imagined.  As his tongue flicked back and forth, again and again, I shouted his name into the darkness, losing all of my earlier inhibitions.

“That’s it,” he murmured quietly, slowly kissing his way back up my stomach as I continued to tremble beneath him.
  He pushed the sweater up as he moved higher, his own body keeping me warm against the chilly night air.  “I’m going to do that…every…single…night,” he said huskily between kisses.  He took one of my breasts into his mouth, teasing my nipple with his tongue, and I clutched his head, holding him to me.  I felt the hard bulge of his erection growing beneath his swim trunks and was suddenly desperate to feel him inside of me.  I reached down with one hand, gently caressing his growing length.

“Do you have a condom?”

“I left them in the cabin.”  He moved further up my body, kissing my neck.  His hand palmed my breast, squeezing and caressing, as he sucked intently on my tender skin.  “I have a better idea though,” he said, his thumb slowly circling my nipple.  It peaked under his touch, and I found myself helpless again at the way my body responded to his.  His hard erection pressed against my stomach, and I was about ready to drag him into the cabin myself to get some protection, when Trent suddenly gazed into my eyes.

“Let’s make a baby,” he
whispered, his voice sexy and low.

“What?” I asked in shock, certain that
I hadn’t heard him right.  I wouldn’t have been more surprised if he’d thrown a bucket of cold water in my face.  A baby?  Trent had never mentioned wanting children, although I knew he loved Hannah.  Although we’d discussed a future together, of all the possibilities once he was back stateside, of how our lives could look years from now, brothers and sisters for Hannah had never even come up.  I stared at him, waiting for him to break into a smile and say he was just kidding, but Trent just quietly waited for my response.  “Are you serious?” I finally managed to ask.

“Completely.
”  He dipped his head, coming in for another kiss.

“Trent,” I said, pushing
against his chest so that I could get up.  He moved aside as I tugged the sweater down and sat up beside him, pulling the blanket around myself.  “We can’t just have a baby.  I mean, we haven’t even discussed it.”

“So let’s discuss it then,” he said, reaching over to caress my hair.
  He gently tipped my chin up toward him and bent down to kiss me.

“Trent, I’m serious,” I said, pulling away.  “I didn’t even know you wanted kids,” I said in disbelief.

“I didn’t either,” he said with a shrug.  “I never even considered it until I met you and Hannah.  I guess I always thought I’d be alone.”

My heart caught i
n my throat as I saw the sadness in his eyes.  I knew I was lucky to have Trent come into my life, to come into Hannah’s as well.  I knew he felt the same way about us.  But I had never planned to have more children.  Truth be told, I hadn’t exactly planned to have Hannah, either, but I wouldn’t have traded my life with her for anything.  Now that I had a life with Trent all mapped out in my mind, a life I thought he’d be happy with and wanted, too, I felt like he was slowly pulling all that away from me.  One future had been dangled in front of my eyes, and now Trent was asking me for something completely different.

My heart pounded in my chest as the realization crept over me that maybe
Trent would never be happy if we didn’t have a baby together.  I was perfectly content with the idea of making a life with just the three of us.  A part of me now felt slightly betrayed that he’d never even mentioned it before.  Hannah was finally in school, and I was going back to work full-time this fall and looking forward to the next chapter in my life.  If Trent and I were to have a baby together, I’d have to put my dreams on hold again.  My entire world would be turned upside down.  I knew Trent was nothing like my ex-boyfriend, but with his deployment, it would be like I was a single mom taking care of a newborn by myself all over again.  Plus I’d have Hannah to take care of.

“Trent,” I said sadly, “I don’t want any more kids.”

“You don’t?” he asked, genuinely seeming surprised.

“No,” I said
emphatically, shaking my head.

Trent studied my face in the moonlight
, now seeming slightly in shock himself.  “I guess I just thought you’d love to have more kids.  You’re such a good mom to Hannah and—” he cut off, seeming unsure of how to continue.

The passion I’d been feeling moments earlier was slowly
fizzling out, replaced by a tiredness from the late hour and a realization of the fact that the man I was in love with wanted a different life than me.  How could we have talked all these long months, sharing both our deepest fantasies and dreams for the future without ever having discussed the possibility of more children?  If that’s what Trent had been wanting, why hadn’t he told me until now?

I sighed, not wanting to
think about it anymore tonight.  Maybe Trent was really just caught up in the passion of the moment and thought it would be a romantic notion for us to have a baby together.  Maybe he just thought he wanted kids.  Spending two weeks with Hannah and me would let him see what life was really like with a young child.  Our entire relationship didn’t hinge on this one moment tonight.  We’d talk more in the morning.  The reality was, at this point, I just wanted to crawl into bed and not think about it anymore.  A nagging little voice in the back of my mind wouldn’t let it go, though.  If having kids of his own was that important to Trent, what was to stop him from finding happiness with someone who would offer him that?

“You’re upset,” Trent said
, hurrying to catch up with me as we walked across the front porch on our way back inside the cabin.

“No, I’m not,” I said, shaking my head.

“You haven’t said a word the entire walk back,” he said, catching my arm.

Trent t
urned me to face him, his hands resting on my shoulders.  He towered above me, and I gazed up at him, wishing we could just go inside and pretend that the entire conversation never even happened.  “I’m just tired.  Maybe we should just talk more about everything tomorrow.”

“Fine, let’s go to bed,” he said, pulling
me to him for a kiss.

I knew Trent thought I’d come around and see his side of things.  He didn’
t seem upset anymore about our conversation and was now sliding his hands down my back and over my bikini bottom as he pulled me closer, showing me just how much he still wanted our romantic evening to continue.

“Maybe I should sleep in Hannah’s room tonight,” I said, breaking away.

“What?” he asked, finally looking as confused as I was feeling.  “Look, we don’t have to have a baby right
now
.  I just want to be with you, Meghan.”

“But you do want a baby. 
Someday.”

“Well, yeah.”

“Let’s just talk more tomorrow.  I’m going to bed.”

“Meghan,” he said, reaching for me again as I turned away.

I pulled my arm free and glanced back over my shoulder.  “Goodnight.”

The hurt in his eyes was unmistakable this time, but maybe now he would realize how I was feeling.
  Hurt.  Trent hadn’t even asked how I felt about our conversation or why I didn’t want another baby.  He just assumed I would be happy.  I felt a knot in my stomach as tears filled my eyes.  This was not how I planned to spend our first night in the cabin—a semi-argument about something huge that didn’t bode well for our future together, us in separate bedrooms.  I couldn’t sleep in the same bed with Trent and let him make love to me though, pretending everything was all right, when I was feeling so uncertain.  I didn’t see how we could have a future together with us each wanting such different things.  My heart already had been broken once, years ago, when my ex-boyfriend disappeared from Hannah’s and my life.  I wasn’t about to let myself fall so hard that I’d end up completely brokenhearted again.