Resisting Her (14 page)

“Christ, Savannah.” He stood, and pulled her
panties up her legs. This sooo should not have happened. Cole
stepped away from her on shaky legs and adjusted the huge erection
tugging against his zipper. Her wide eyes followed his movements. A
twinge of disappointment colored her features, but Cole ignored it.
He stalked out to the kitchen and found a bottle of vodka and the
orange juice sitting on the island. Savannah had broken into his
liquor cabinet like a damn rebellious teenager. Is this what her
therapist had warned him about? She’d gotten drunk, and apparently
horny, and he’d fallen for it, hook, line and sinker.

With the scent of her still clinging to his
lips and fingers, Cole fled to the master bathroom. He dragged his
jeans down just enough to free his erection and pumped a squirt of
hand lotion into his palm. He rubbed it against his cock, pumping
and thrusting his hips in time to match his hand’s frenzied
movements. Only a few strokes later, he came with a breathy moan,
emptying himself into the palm of his other hand.

After washing up, he returned to his bedroom
and found Savannah sitting in the center of his bed.

Their eyes locked on each other’s, and he
read hers for signs that she regretted what they’d done moments
ago, but found none.

“It smells like her in here.” Savannah
wrinkled her nose.

Cole began working to change the sheets and
pillow cases. If she wasn’t going to bring up what he’d just done
to her, neither was he. He gathered a clean set of sheets and
tossed them on the mattress. He wouldn’t make Savannah sleep where
he’d just bed another woman, but he also wouldn’t turn her away
now. She’d been too vulnerable, let her guard down with him
completely. And if this is where she wanted to be, he wouldn’t deny
her. Couldn’t. Not now. Maybe not ever.

“Cole?” Her voice had a pleading quality,
like she needed reassurance about where they now stood.

“Get in bed, Savannah.”

She turned for the door. His hand on her
elbow stopped her. “No, in my bed. With me.”

She smiled and crawled in beside him, laying
her head on his chest once they were settled in the darkness.

“I don’t want you drinking, Savannah.”

“I, I’m sorry. Are you mad at me?”

“No, I’m not mad at you.” Mad at himself was
more like it. He shouldn’t have touched her. But now that he had,
he wanted nothing more than to do it again and again. “Are you
still drunk?”

“I’m not drunk. I only had a little bit while
I waited for you to get home. I just wanted to see what it was
like.”

He couldn’t be upset with Savannah. He’d left
her alone tonight to go out with another woman. Savannah had gotten
bored. She’d done what a lot of nineteen-almost-twenty-year-olds
did on the weekends.

“How are you feeling now?” he asked, needing
some indication of what was going on inside her head.

“Fine.”

“Just fine?” He smirked, turning to look at
her.

She smiled against his skin, then yawned.
“I’m sleepy. You stayed out late.”

He didn’t point out that she was most likely
drained from the combination of the alcohol and the powerful orgasm
he’d given her, rather than the late hour. “Was that okay, what
happened in your room?”

“Yes. It’s just…”

“Just what?” he prompted, his heart kicking
up speed. He didn’t want to hear her say she regretted it. He sure
as hell didn’t.

“You didn’t kiss me. And you didn’t let me
touch you.”

“You wanted that?”

She nodded, her face still turned down.

“Are you a virgin?” he whispered.

The muscles in her back tensed, and his hand
stilled against her skin.

“Yes.”

Relief flooded his system. “Good. You’re
going to stay that way.”

“But Cole…”

“No. Don’t say anything else right now. We’re
not talking about that. Especially not when you’ve been
drinking.”

She let out a deep sigh. “Can I just say one
thing?”

He clenched his fist at his side, knowing
it’d be futile to refuse her request. “One.”

She took a deep breath as if preparing to
give a speech. “When I’m with Dr. White, or Marissa, they see me as
a normal girl, with normal wants and needs — to be loved, to have
physical affection—but sometimes I don’t think you see me like
that. You still look at me like I’m the scared, crying girl you
pulled out of that compound. I just want you to know — I want
more.”

He took a second to let her words sink in. It
had only been a few weeks. Did she really know what she wanted? Was
she even capable of more right now? He didn’t want to think about
her dating. In fact, the idea scared the shit out of him. But she
was a bright, pretty girl. He couldn’t just keep her hidden away,
no matter how much he might want to. Perhaps the alcohol had
loosened her tongue some, but it was true, she didn’t sound drunk.
Not at all. She sounded confident and sure. “That’s good Savannah.
I want you to have those things too. You deserve all of that and
more.” But he knew he was not the man for her. He could come up
with a list of a thousand reasons why: he was too old for her; she
needed more time to heal; he was married to his job; he wasn’t
looking for a relationship; and the list went on and on. But tell
that to his body. He wanted her, even though he knew it was
impossible.

“Savannah?” he whispered in the darkness,
unable to stop himself from following up on her comment about
kissing him.

“Yes?”

“Have you been kissed before?”

“No.”

He closed his eyes. Just like he thought.
“Okay. One goodnight kiss.” He knew it was a bad idea, that it
would irrevocably change things between them, but damn he wanted to
taste her lips, to be her first. He needed it like he needed his
next breath.

He shifted and she lifted her head from his
chest, allowing him to move over top of her. He hovered over her,
lowering himself slowly until their bodies lay flush — his hips
aligned with hers, his chest just brushing her hardened nipples and
their mouths millimeters from touching. He held himself up on his
elbows, and cradled her head in his hands, brushing strands of hair
back from her face. Her breath came in fast little puffs against
his lips. He took his time, unwilling to rush this. Angling her jaw
to his, he lowered down to meet her waiting mouth.

Her lips were full and soft, and he pressed
against her, deepening the kiss. Even if part of him knew he
shouldn’t do this, she deserved to be kissed properly for her first
kiss. Cole parted her lips, and when her tongue met his, eager and
wet as it swirled against his, his dick went instantly hard again.
She didn’t kiss like a beginner. He pressed himself into the crook
between her legs, and Savannah automatically wrapped her legs
around his waist and let out a ragged breath. The heat at her
center cradled him and he ground his hips in closer, biting back a
moan from the friction. His restraint was dangling by a thread. As
fucking amazing as it felt, Cole broke the kiss, knowing he
wouldn’t be able to stop himself if they kept going. He pressed a
chaste kiss to her forehead. “There, now you’ve been properly
kissed.”

She smiled up at him, her eyes blinking open
lazily.

He chuckled at how damn cute she looked,
sated and sleepy. “Just get some rest, okay?”

“Okay.” She rolled to her side, and nuzzled
into the pillow.

That Sunday, like every Sunday, Cole prepared
for his visit with Abbie. It wasn’t so much that he wanted to go,
more like he was obligated. He wouldn’t break their weekly
appointment simply because he didn’t feel like going. Their
relationship was much too complex.

He dressed casually, in jeans and a polo
shirt. But he added a spray of cologne to his neck just because he
knew it made her smile.

“Savannah, I have to go out for a little
while. Will you be okay?”

Savannah crossed her arms over her chest and
watched as he slipped on a pair of well-worn loafers. “Of course.
I’ll be fine.”

“I won’t be gone long.”

She glanced around the quiet, empty apartment
with a frown. Cole knew it probably wasn’t possible for her to feel
at home in his stark bachelor pad. She was accustomed to the noise
and constant company of living with forty people. The silence
stretched between them, and they each refused to break eye contact.
He was glad she hadn’t asked where he was going. He wouldn’t enjoy
lying to her. “I’ll only be gone an hour or so.”

Once outside, the sunlight was too bright,
casting an overly cheery halo for the occasion. The drive only took
ten minutes and Cole parked in front of the building, a familiar
knot of uneasiness settling in the pit of his stomach. He always
felt dirty when he arrived here, but knew by the time he left, it
would be with the relief he craved — however short-lived.

***

When he returned that afternoon, Cole found
Savannah in her bedroom with clothes covering her bed and Cuddles
perched on a pillow to supervise. “What are you doing?”

Savannah glanced up but continued her task.
“Just picking out an outfit for our date. I mean my date with Levi
tonight.”

She still wanted to go on the date with
Levi? Even after he’d touched her?
If he thought it had changed
anything between them, he was wrong. It was strange to realize, but
he supposed she’d needed the physical release just like he had.
Simple as that. “Is this what you want, Savannah?”

She studied him for a moment, abandoning the
stack of jeans and leggings. “Marissa thought it would be good for
me — I’ve never been on a date before.”

Oh, if Marissa thought it was okay. Damn
meddling Marissa.
Though he supposed it was good for her to do
things any normal nineteen year-old-girl would do. He nodded his
okay.

The remainder of the afternoon passed with as
little talking as possible. If he could have taken to grunting and
pointing, he would have. If Savannah didn’t acknowledge what
happened between them, he wouldn’t either. She must have been more
drunk than she’d let on that night. It was a mistake to touch her
like he had, to take advantage. It wouldn’t happen again, no matter
his dick’s insistent pleas every time she was near.

Later they met Levi and Deb, his overly sexed
mom, in their apartment for a drink before their dinner date. Deb
greeted him with a kiss on both cheeks and a squeeze on his ass. He
knew he would to be batting her hands off him all night. Not that
he really minded a squeeze here or there, he just didn’t want to
put Savannah in an awkward position. Because he sure as shit wasn’t
going to be okay with Levi’s hands all over Savannah. Just the
thought sent Cole’s mood south. Levi was her age; Cole should be
happy if they hit it off. But the thought of another man touching
her made him shudder.

Levi looked Savannah up and down, and Cole
cursed his sister yet again for the provocative little outfits
she’d picked out. He didn’t expect his sister to buy such sexy
clothes for Savannah. And fragrant body washes and lotions—his damn
bathroom smelled like a girl. He wasn’t used to that. Although upon
more closely inspecting her, dressed in dark skinny jeans and a
turquoise silk blouse that billowed out from her trim figure, he
supposed it wasn’t all that provocative. It was just Savannah. She
was gorgeous. She’d still be gorgeous if she was dressed in a
burlap sack.

Savannah fidgeted, tugging on the hem of her
top under Levi’s inspection. Cole had no doubt that she was unaware
of her beauty, the power she held over men. But she’d blossomed
like a flower into a beautiful young woman, and he hated that no
one had told her that.

Deb was overly made up — wearing a skin tight
black dress that barely covered her ass and heels so tall she
teetered when she walked. She was trying way too hard. After
greetings were exchanged, and Deb had fawned over how pretty
Savannah was, they were led into the kitchen.

“What can I get you guys? I have beer,
wine…”

“Savannah’s not twenty-one,” Cole pointed
out.

Deb waved him off. “Oh relax, we’re all going
to have a little fun tonight.” Deb handed Savannah a glass of
blush-colored wine. “You always this uptight?” she asked, handing
Cole a beer. “We’ll have to work on that.”

“You remember I work for law enforcement,
right?”

Deb chuckled, shaking her head and dismissing
his comment. Savannah looked down and accepted the wine, but Cole
could see the hint of a grin on her face.

He sipped his beer in silence, his eyes
following Savannah’s movements. She told Deb all about Cuddles and
her recent shopping spree with Marissa. Poor Levi had no idea how
to get himself into their conversation, and Cole wasn’t about to
help him. Bastard. He just sat back and enjoyed listening to
Savannah. She grew more comfortable, a little more confident with
each passing day, her face lighting up as she spoke.

After their drinks, they headed down the
parking garage. Cole’s Tahoe was large enough for them to ride
together. Just before they reached the car, Savannah leaned in
close to his ear. “Are you going to invite Deb over later?”

He turned to study her. “No. I won’t do that
again, Savannah. It’ll be just you and me tonight.”

Her shoulders visibly relaxed, and she
climbed into the backseat with Levi. Cole was thankful that he
could keep an eye on things from the rearview mirror, and he
noticed Savannah catching his gaze more than once.

They ate at a Mexican restaurant, the four of
them squeezed into a booth. He had to hand it to Levi; he’d opened
doors and been attentive and kind to Savannah so far. Which was too
bad, because Cole was just waiting for the chance to haul off and
kick his ass. Though he supposed if he did that, he’d get an earful
from Marissa about ruining Savannah’s first date. As long as Levi
didn’t cross the line, he had nothing to worry about.