By the time I arrive at Luke and Shayne’s house, the girls are running all over the place. With my spirits up, I wander around the house with both Lucy and Sierra tagging along, making sure everything is the way Shayne wanted it. Finally, we make our way up the stars to help Shayne get ready and I catch sight of Luke coming out of the bedroom.
“What are you doing in there? You know you’re not supposed to see Mommy before the wedding!” Lucy screeches. Lowering himself down to Lucy’s level, Luke kisses her on the cheek.
“Don’t worry pretty girl. Daddy just needed to get this,” he says, holding up a tie. “Mommy was in the bathroom so I haven’t seen her.”
Lucy crosses her arms over her chest. “Well you better go now Daddy, because we have to help Mommy get all pretty and Sierra and I have to put on our pink dresses and our princess crowns.”
Luke pulls both of the girls in for a hug and then releases them, sending them giggling and running down the hall into the bedroom where Shayne is. Straightening up, he draws me in for a big hug, too.
“Thank you for everything you have done for us, Erin,” he says as he releases me. All of the sorrow and pain I was feeling earlier is gone in that instant, knowing my best friend is about to marry the love of her life. With a perk in my step, I am now ready to help Shayne prepare for the happiest day of her life.
************
“Would you stop fidgeting and let me finish your damn hair? God, you act like you’re getting married or something.”
The stern look Shayne gives me in the mirror does nothing for either one of us. We both start laughing so hard, we end up doubled over clutching our stomachs because it hurts so much. Shayne gets up and runs into the bathroom and I laugh even harder as I hear her relieve herself, but I really lose it when she comes out with black mascara running down her face. Call me crazy, but the sound of my own laughter mixed with hers will be one of my favorite memories. The fact that this will be one hell of a story for us to tell the girls puts this way up on the epic scale.
“You are the most beautiful bride I have ever seen, Shayne. Look at you!” I exclaim as she turns around and glances at herself in the mirror. By the way she looks right now you would have never thought that a little less than an hour ago she looked like a Bridezilla from hell.
“I can’t believe this day is finally here, Erin. I have waited what seems like a lifetime for us to finally be a family.” She pauses for a moment. “You know, I had a dream last night about Aunt Judy. It was so real.”
I can hear the sadness in her voice, so I place myself in front of her. There is a stray tear slowly falling down her face; I wipe it away, and then take both of her hands into mine.
“You will always carry a piece of your aunt with you, honey. She molded you into the woman you are today, and you are the strongest, most kind-hearted person I know. Now, do you want to talk about that dream?” When she looks up at me with a big smile on her face, I know she is going to be just fine.
Shayne releases her hands from mine and divulges her dream, in which her aunt is so utterly happy for her. Just as she is winding up telling me the end of her dream, there is a knock at the door...and when I pull it open I am face to face with the one man who seems to be in every single one of my own dreams.
“Am I interrupting anything, ladies?” Adam questions.
My eyes totally betray me as they move on their own and scan him from head to toe. Damn, he is so freaking HOT.
I finally get my brain to tell my mouth to talk. “No. We were just finishing up.” I sweep my arm for him to come in and as he walks past me I do what any hot-blooded woman would do when a handsome man walks by her- I totally check out his ass. Even after looking at that ass every day, I still can’t get enough. However, I do notice the fact that he does not even look at me when he walks by.
“I will leave the two of you to do your thing,” I announce. “I’m going to go check on the girls and finish getting everything set up.”
“Erin, wait.” Adam looks at me with what I can only describe as lust and heat in his eyes as he looks me up and down. “You look absolutely stunning.”
My face flushes. I know it does because no man has ever told me that before. “Thank you.” I politely answer, still unable to look at him as I am still too ashamed of my earlier behavior.
Shayne lifts the small train of her dress and wraps me in her arms, leaning in to whisper softly in my ear.
“There was a small part of my dream that I forgot to tell you.” She pulls herself away from me, studying my expression for the slightest of moments before pressing her cheek back against mine. “Aunt Judy told me that both of her children are heading towards happiness and she believes that Adam’s happiness is you.”
After delivering that explosive statement, Shayne steps back to give me a moment to myself. It takes every ounce of strength within me not to run straight into Adam’s arms, but deep down inside I know I am just no good for him. There is no way I am bringing the gentlest man I have ever met into the depths of the hell that I am living.
Chapter Two
Erin
Bracing myself against the door after I step out of the room with Shayne and Adam, I can feel myself start to shake as I envision what it would be like to have someone love you so much. Just to have someone look at me like there is nothing else in this world and really see me for me.
Wiping away the tears that have snuck past my typical run-of-the-mill ‘Yes, I’m okay’ façade, I smooth out my dress and attempt to walk down the hall to Lucy’s room. Hearing the sound of both of the girls’ giggles as Luke’s mom Camillia orders them around brings a much-needed smile to my face. Inside, it’s chaos. Both of the girls are running around chasing each other as Camillia stands there with her hands on her hips. I can tell she is frazzled.
“Girls, enough playing around! We have so much left to do.”
My stern words bring them both to a halt.
“But Mommy, we’re playing,” Sierra silly laughs.
“Not anymore, you’re not. Now Lucy, let your grandma get you dressed, and Sierra, get your butt over here now. We have to meet Mrs. Williams downstairs and set up the flowers and make sure everything is perfect, which I can’t do without the two of you, so let’s get you all prettied up and make you look like the little princesses that you are.”
It’s the word ‘princess’ that gets the two of them to move, but when we’re finished and the two of them have taken a look at themselves in the mirror, they twirl around and start chasing each other again. They are so carefree and don’t have a thing to worry about in this world; that is what I can only hope my life will be like someday.
************
“Mrs. Williams, these flowers are simply exquisite. Shayne is going to love them,” I add as Camillia, Mrs. Williams and I set the flower arrangements all around the house.
“I am so happy to be a part of this special day for all of you,” she replies.
I take a deep breath and lift my face up into the warm sun as we enter the backyard where the wedding will be held. This day could not be more perfect for an outdoor wedding. There is a gentle breeze and the sun is shining so brightly. The tops of the trees have just started to change color.
“It’s beautiful out here, Luke,” I tell him as he comes to stand next to me.
“It is,” he agrees as he turns and looks in my direction. “I have waited a lifetime to marry Shayne.”
“I know you have, and so has she. I can’t think of anyone who deserves to be happy more than the two of you.”
Luke puts his arm around my shoulder in a friendly manner. “I agree with you on half of that, Erin. We do deserve to be happy, but so do you. I just hope you don’t make the same mistake that both Shayne and I did and waste time...time you can never get back. Don’t waste it, Erin.”
He removes his arm and walks over to Lucy. I hear him silently talking to her about the gift she has for her mother from the two of them, and when she leaps into his arms and they stand there and hold each other, I sigh. My heart wishes to be able to have that same type of happiness and to be able to give it to my precious daughter as well.
“There. I think everything is perfect now, don’t you?” Camillia asks as she finally stops running around like a madwoman ordering Vincent and Antonio to do this and to do that. How in the hell she still looks so good is beyond me.
I nudge her with my shoulder. “You outdid yourself.”
“Thank you. Well, you know the saying...it’s not every day that your child gets married, and this day has been a long time coming, my dear.”
“It sure has, honey,” Vincent chimes in as he approaches.
“Where are Luke and Lucy? I am ready to get this kick-ass party started,” Antonio remarks as he makes his way towards us.
“Luke and Lucy just went inside to give something to Shayne, and I have no idea where Adam is,” I inform them all as I search the backyard for Adam.
“Well, everyone is here now so they have about ten minutes,” Camillia says. .“ Let me go see if I can find all of them.”
I stop her before she rushes off. “I can do that. I need to grab my bouquet anyway.”
“Thank you, sweet girl. I just need to check on one more thing and then we will be all set.”
With a swift and steady turn, Camillia is off. As soon as she is out of earshot both Vincent and Antonio roll their eyes and laugh. I laugh with them before setting off to find the missing wedding party.
“Erin,” Luke calls as I enter the house. “Lucy has Shayne’s wedding gift from me. Would you take them up to her?”
“Sure, I would love to. I am heading up there anyway. Come on little princess,” I say to Lucy as I take hold of her small hand.
“Thanks, Erin,” Luke says with a nervous yet excited tone, and then looks adoringly into Lucy’s eyes. “You look so pretty my baby girl. Make sure you tell Mommy exactly what I told you to tell her for me, okay?”
“I will, Daddy.”
“Thanks, sweetheart, and I will see you in a few minutes, okay?”
“Okay, Daddy. Come on, Aunt Erin. I have a big job to do and I want to give this to my Mommy so she can wear it. Daddy said she might cry when she sees it so he told me I have to tell her not to.”
“You have a very important job to do then, don’t you, sweet girl?”
“That’s what Daddy said, too,” she giggles as we climb the stairs. We’re just coming to the top when I see Adam approaching the landing to descend. When our eyes lock onto each other’s, I let go of Lucy’s hand and without taking my eyes off of his, I tell her to go give her gift to her mother.
“Hi,” I say shyly as I take my last step and draw nearer to him.
“Hey.”
I am startled when he gently takes hold of my hand and brings it up to his lips, lightly brushing them across the inside of my wrist.
“I have never seen anyone more strikingly gorgeous in my entire life as you. That dress makes you look like a goddess, Erin. You simply take my breath away.”
I am shocked at his kind words after what happened between the two of us this morning. I don’t even know how to respond to his compliment, so I withdraw my hand from his with a simple, “Thank you.” I step around him and begin to move away but after I take a few steps I turn back around.
“Adam.”
He turns and glances my way with a curious look.
“Handsome is an understatement for the way you look today.”
He simply nods and as I watch him disappear out of my sight, I feel a hole start to burn in my chest because I have no clue as to what I am going to do to fix the pain I see written all over his face.
I paste on a smile and push open the door to Shayne’s room.
“Well, this is it,” I call out as I enter the room. She is sitting on the edge of the bed with Lucy beside her, and as she looks up at me I can tell she is trying to hold back tears.
“What’s wrong?” I ask as I shut the door behind me.
“Nothing’s wrong. Everything is just as it should be. It’s just that my soon to be husband gave me this.”
She hands me the small box, and as I open it and look inside I can see why she is crying.
“Daddy and I picked it out at the store the other day,” Lucy chirps without having a clue as to the sentimental meaning of the ankle bracelet I hold in my hand which has a single dolphin hanging from it.
“Will you put it around my ankle for me please, Erin?”
“Of course.” I take the bracelet out of the box and kneel down and clasp it around her ankle. Shayne stands up and treads delicately in front of the mirror where she lifts up her dress and looks at her ankle. The bracelet glimmers in the sun shining through the window.
“Oh, how I love that man,” she sighs. She turns to face the two of us with a smile and a sparkle in her eyes. “Thank you for my gift, sweet girl. Are you ready?”
Lucy jumps up and starts clapping her hands. “I’m ready, Mommy.”
“Well all right then, my little dolphin. Let’s do this.”
As Lucy, Sierra, and I descend the stairs with Adam and Shayne close behind, I feel a rush of excitement over take me as I know this will be the first time Shayne has seen how we have decorated her home and the backyard for her special day. It doesn’t take long for me to feel her warm hand touch my shoulder.
“Erin, this is...God, girlfriend, you outdid yourself here. The pink and white lights mixed together and the flowers are simply out of this world. I know this sounds so cliché, but I have to tell you again that I wouldn’t want anyone else to be standing by my side today. You really are my best friend.”
“I wouldn’t want to be anyone else’s best friend but yours, Shayne,” I answer, glancing at her beaming face. “Now before we start crying for the hundredth time today, let’s get you married, because I know that man of yours can’t wait to make you his wife.”
The look on Luke’s face as he sees Shayne for the first time will be forever embedded into my brain. I know that as I walk down the aisle he isn’t looking at me, he is staring at his whole world, the woman who is walking behind me. When I turn to take my place, he lets out the most primal, spontaneous gasp of adoration that I have ever heard. Tears of joy roll down his face as he brings his hand up to cover his mouth. As he finally has Shayne’s hand placed in his by Adam, the look on both of their faces as they stand with Lucy in front of them is, in one word, priceless.
Adam turns to take his seat. His eyes catch mine for a brief moment and I wonder to myself what it would be like to truly be happy and to have Adam look at me the way Luke looks at Shayne. I would give anything to have this man claim me as his own. God, help me get past all these insecurities I have about myself!
“Luciano, you may kiss your bride.”
The minister says the words everyone has been waiting for and Luke doesn’t hesitate to bring his wife into his arms and kiss her with everything that he has. Little Miss Lucy has taken a step back as instructed from rehearsal and watches her parents inquisitively. I blush and have to turn away as their kiss seems like it goes on forever.
When I look at Adam, I notice he isn’t observing the bride and groom...he is looking directly at me, and I’ll be damned if I don’t see a slight indication of passion within his deep green gaze. I don’t want to pull my eyes away from his. I feel like he is surveying my reaction to all of this and I hold his hungry look for as long as I can until I hear the minister start to introduce Mr. and Mrs. Luciano Schavone to the small crowd.
Shayne takes hold of Lucy’s hand as the three of them make their way down the aisle followed by Antonio, Sierra, and me.
“Damn, Erin did you see the way Adam was looking at you when you were standing up there?” Antonio toys with me as we make our way into the house for pictures.
“Oh, stop it, Antonio. He was not.”
“Bull fucking shit, woman. That man has it bad for you. Hell, we all know it...you’re the only one who doesn’t see it.”
“What the hell are you going on about, Antonio?”
“Listen, Erin. I know this isn’t any of my business, but he’s a good man, and...”
I throw my hand up at him.
“Stop right there. I know he is a good man, but there is so much you don’t know about and today is not the day to talk about this.”
“You’re wrong, Erin. Now I may not know a damn thing about a relationship, but one thing I do know is that my brother walked through seven years of his life aching for Shayne and you have the same look in your eyes that he always had in his.”
By this time we are all standing inside the house and everyone is congratulating Luke and Shayne, not paying any attention to the little spat going on between the two of us. I place my hands on my hips because I am now fuming at this nosy man. “And what look is that, Mr. Know-it-all?”
“Pain. It’s the look of pain, Erin. And you’re much too beautiful to have such a look on your face.”
With that parting shot, he turns around and walks over to the happy couple, not giving me any time to respond.
I finally make my way over to the bride and groom.
“I am so happy for you!” I exclaim, pulling Shayne into an embrace.
“Thank you for everything, Erin. Can you believe it? I am finally his wife.”
“It’s real, Mrs. Schavone,” Luke says as Shayne lays her head on his shoulder. “God, I will never get sick of calling you that,” he says in wonder as he bends down and takes her in for another kiss, which I decide is my cue to leave the two of them alone for a moment.
************
“I think that’s the last picture,” the photographer finally says, and every single one of us lets out a sigh of relief.
“Whose idea was it to wait until after the wedding to have all these pictures taken, anyway?” Leave it to Antonio and his mouth to get a slap upside the head from his mother.
“It’s tradition, smart mouth. Keep it up and I will make it ten times worse when you get married,” she promises.
Every adult in the room laughs at that. “Well then I don’t have anything to worry about because hell will never freeze over, which means I am never going to be tying myself down to one woman.” Antonio glances over to Luke. “No offense, bro.”