Remember When 2 (8 page)

   “You never told me about that!”

   “Yeah, well, it was a shock, let me tell you. I was so panicked at the thought of being knocked up, but then I took the test and it showed up negative. It was weird, because instead of being relieved, I felt…
disappointed
. Pick, too. We didn’t realize that we were
ready
for this until then. We started trying after that.”

   “Trying?” I asked. That sounded so grown-up to me. “Yeesh. It’s like you spend your whole life trying
not
to get preggers, it must have been strange to actually
want
to get knocked up. What did Pick say?”

   “Oh, I woke the poor guy up at five this morning. I came running out of the bathroom wielding the pee stick, just shrieking at him. He jumped up, grabbing for his golf club under the bed before he realized I wasn’t being murdered.”

   “Ha! But he’s happy?”

   “Over the moon.”

   “Did you tell your parents yet? Oh my
God
, what did your
mother
say?!”

   “Oh, Steph just hit the roof. She woke my father up screaming and the two of them were just laughing and crying hysterically over the phone. She got all mad that I had
called
her about it instead of going over in person. So, I pit-stopped there before coming here, but I’ll go back with Pick after our breakfast.”

   The information finally caught up with me, enough so that I had to sit down before my legs gave out. Lisa took a seat too, and I reached across the table to grab her hands, staring dumbstruck into her beaming face. “Wow. Just... wow, Lis. I can’t believe you’re actually going to have a baby. A real, live, human baby!”

   “Well, God willing. I mean, it could turn out to be a T-Rex or something.”

   We both laughed.

   “Do you know when you’re due?” Oh God. It was just such an adult conversation.
Due dates
? How could I be discussing due dates with my childhood best friend? In my mind, she was perpetually seven years old.

   “Well, I haven’t even called the doctor yet, but based on my calculations, I’d have to guess sometime around May?”

   It was going to be quite the busy spring; planning my wedding, attending my cousin’s… and now there was a baby on the way. God… a baby! I still couldn’t wrap my brain around it.

   “I’m going to be an aunt!” I suddenly declared, with marked enthusiasm.

   “Well, good for
you
. It’s quite the accomplishment.
You
should be proud. I’m so happy for
you
. Congratulations.”

   I started cracking up at Lisa’s flat tone. I knew she was kidding, but I also knew the next months were going to be a hormonal bitchfest. Lis was moody enough without the added chemical imbalance. Time to poke the bear. “Shut it. You’re just pissed that you’re gonna get fat.”

   Instead of rising to my comment, she shot me a
durrhurr
face and said, “Oh, hey. Speaking of that… I brought Louie for
you
, by the way.”

   I gave her a wide-eyed smile before rising out of my chair and heading over to the satchel I’d dumped near the front door. “For me?”

   “Don’t look so excited, you’re only getting the stuff inside. I expect the
bag
back.”

   I lugged the huge tote into my living room and plopped the thing onto my futon. When I unzipped it, I saw—much to my delight—an entire closet’s worth of clothes.

   Before I could even ask, Lisa said, “It’s a few favorite things from my fall wardrobe. Lord knows I’ll be too
fat
to fit in any of it by then, so I figured at least one of us should get some use out of it.” Then she got up to fix our mimosas.

   Jeez. Lisa was already getting pissy about the weight situation, but from the look of her, I’d guessed she hadn’t so much as gained a single ounce yet. The next months were going to be fun. Not.

   I started tearing through everything, pulling out piece after piece, laying them out in a mound on the coffee table, spreading my favorites across the back of the sofa. Lisa was always such a clothes horse, a condition made worse during her years at the various fashion institutes she’d attended after high school. When she and Pick had first moved out to California, she’d gone to Hollywood Arts and gotten her BA in Design. But by the time they’d moved back east, Pick was earning a crazy enough salary that her education was used less toward advancing her career and more toward maxing out her credit cards. She was fond of saying that she had majored in shopping, earning her degree from the college of Neiman Marcus.

   I couldn’t believe the outfits I was pulling out of that bag. Practically every label was designer, and most of the stuff was unworn, brand-spanking-new, with tags! 

   I was squealing in delight, giddily checking out my beautiful new wardrobe. “Oh my God. You’re like my favorite person in the world right now. You know that, right?”

   Lis put her hands to her hips. “And just exactly what was I
before
, you bitch?”

   I cracked up and met her back in the kitchen, where she handed me a glass.

   We looked at each other, not knowing where to begin. There was just so much to celebrate.

   “To the baby,” I finally started in.

   “To your interview!” she added.

   My stomach dropped just thinking about it. Not just because of the possible boon to my career, but for the fact that I was going to see my old boyfriend within a matter of hours. The thought freaked me out, but I was careful not to show it.

   “To new clothes!” I added with an excited grin.

   “Don’t rub it in. To your impending career-related perks.”

   “Wishful thinking. To the Knicks making the playoffs!”

   “That’s
really
wishful thinking. To first loves.”

   “Yes, of course. To you and Pickford.”

   “
And
you and Trip.”

   “Lis, cut it out.”

   “What?”

   I knew what she was trying to do, but it wasn’t going to work. “Just don’t, okay? I’m already nervous enough about having to see him again. I don’t need the constant reminder. Anyway, that stuff between me and him was over a long time ago.”

   “Oh. So, we’re just supposed to
not
discuss it? Are you really trying to tell me you’re not the least bit excited about this whole thing? If you’re so over it, why is it bothering you so much?”

   “I’m engaged.”

   She rolled her eyes, playfully dismissing such an “insignificant” circumstance. “Yeah. Engaged. Not dead. C’mon, give an old married fatty a vicarious thrill. I’m counting on you to jump Trip’s bones tomorrow and then tell me everything about it afterward. If the story’s even close to the first time you two got it on, I’ll be happy. Please. I need this.”

   I almost did a spittake, cracking up. “You’re insane!”

   “No, I’m married. Big difference. Well, not really, I guess. Look, the point is, I will never know what it’s like to have sex with a movie star. You have to do this, okay? Please, I’m begging you. For me.”

   I slammed down my drink in one shot and then went over to the counter to fix another, laughing hysterically. “Lisa Marie DeSanto Redy. I will
not
sleep with my ex-boyfriend just so you can get some twisted, perverted, secondhand kick out of it. This is just like that time you made me watch
The Exorcist
while describing the whole movie over the phone because you were too afraid to watch it yourself. I’d like to remind you that this is my life you’re playing with here.”

   “No it’s not.”

   “What?” Her comment made me stop laughing, because I already knew what was coming. God help me, I already knew.

   “How can it be your life when I’m not even a part of it? How can you seriously consider marrying this guy?”

   And there it was.

   Suddenly, what started out as a funny conversation had unexpectedly turned serious.

   “His name is Devin, by the way,” I shot back in defense.

   The thing was, that was the only ammo I had in my arsenal. She was right. My best friend in the entire world didn’t even know my fiancé. It really was pretty bizarre. I’d had that same niggling concern in the back of my mind when Devin popped the question; realizing that my friends and family had barely even met him. His work kept him so busy, and I truly appreciated his steadfast dedication to his job. Truly. But there were so many things he missed out on because of it. So many family events and dinners out with friends and random Sunday barbeques that went unattended. I’d gotten used to showing up places alone.

   I just figured that now that we were engaged, the people in my life would be thrown into the same room with him a million times before the actual wedding. There would be parties in our honor, rehearsals, tux fittings, etc. He’d bailed on making appearances while we were dating, but now that we were going to be married, that would change, right? Lisa would have at least a year to get to know the guy. I didn’t think I’d be able to walk down the aisle if that didn’t happen.

   She gave a huff and said, “You haven’t even told anyone but me about the fact that you’re
engaged
. Don’t you find that a little odd? It’s like you’re trying to keep it a secret.”

   “I’m not. I was planning on Devin and me telling my father before Jack’s engagement party.”

   “But…?”

   When I didn’t respond, Lisa answered for me. “But Devin’s not going to the party, is he.”

   I didn’t need to confirm it. She already knew it was true.

   “How much longer are you going to wait? God, don’t you remember how excited I was when Pick finally made with the ring? There wasn’t a single person in my life that didn’t know about it within an hour of that happening. I’ve been dying to talk to my mother about this, but I can’t even do that until
you
do.”

   “Well, gee. I’m so sorry you don’t get to talk to your mom about
my
engagement.”

   “Layla, give me a break. You know damn well she’ll be jumping out of her skin when she hears the news. She’ll be on the phone with Kleinfeld’s the second she finds out, making the appointment to go get your dress. She lives for that stuff.”

   My heart panged when I thought about going dress shopping with Lisa’s mom. I hadn’t really thought about it, but of course she’d be the one to take me.

   I felt guilty about the fact that I hadn’t spilled the beans about such big news, not only to Lisa’s parents, but especially my own brother and father. I truly wasn’t trying to keep secrets from my family and friends. It’s just that I’d been keeping my life with them separate from my life with Devin for so long, and I was just waiting to figure out the correct way to merge the two. I was just waiting for the right time.

   Timing, after all, was everything.

Chapter 8

PANIC

   I made myself eat breakfast that Monday morning, but it was difficult to do with my stomach so tied up in knots.

   It had been one week since I found out Trip was in New York, five days since I finagled a press pass to attend the junket and twenty-four hours since Lisa dropped off the designer suit she’d lent me from her pre-pregnancy wardrobe.

   Multiply that by the nine years it had been since I’d last seen Trip, and it all added up to the thirty-seven times I felt like throwing up that morning.

   I checked my reflection in the mirror, again, adjusted the thin silver belt at my waist, and smoothed away some non-existent wrinkles from my slacks. The suit was sleek, black and nicer than anything hanging in my own closet, and I was grateful to have it. I’d left the blazer open, revealing a white silk shell underneath, trying for a more casual look even though I was feeling anything but. I cursed my frazzled nerves and tried to get myself under control.

   It was strange enough to think about being in the same room with my old high school sweetheart, but it was positively surreal to have to reconcile that eighteen-year-old boy with the überhot movie star that he’d become.

   There isn’t a girl alive that doesn’t want to feel like she’s left some sort of imprint on every single one of her exes, and I was no different in that regard. But how many girls have to deal with their ex becoming a famous movie star who had since been with no less than half a million other women, most of whom were beautiful Hollywood movie stars themselves? How would I even rank in such a grouping?

   I had a guilty vision of Devin and reminded myself that I really shouldn’t even care about any of that. I grabbed my leather carryall and headed out the door.