Remember Me (35 page)

be able to hide for long in my “No Pets Allowed” apartment, she’d also brought the “For Sale” portion of the most recent real estate ads. We spent the remainder of the afternoon circling and crossing out the maybes, and the not on your life choices within the ads. Emma was tuckered out and spent most of her time resting her head on my foot. I thought, “Play hard and crash harder, the life of a puppy.” I hadn’t realized how much I needed to feel this Amy’s presence. She hadn’t been around for awhile, and I was in a state of withdrawal. She had a knack for making me feel peaceful. As I occasionally stole a glance at her, I had the heightened sense that maybe I did the same for her.

Not once did we bring up work or Tom. We shared our

dreams and aspirations, we shared the moments of significance from our lives, and we shared our fears. Amy feared she wouldn’t be able to cut it in the male-dominated world of advertising and marketing. I told her the world would be crazy not to hire her, in fact I could think of no one better to head E.M.J.’s marketing department.

“Really?”

“Really. Can you think of anyone else who’d be a better fit or do as good a job?”

“Are you offering me a position?” she asked, and that cute S 262 S

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little smile creased the corners of her mouth and made the dimples in her cheeks stand out.

“Are you looking for one?” I countered, the red color of my face heating me up, inside out. It was all I could do to not sweep her into my arms and kiss her deeply. My ache was deep and full of need. There would never be any doubt; the two of us had a special bond, a deep connection, regardless of our ages. “I would love to work for you.” Amy spoke the words, but there was a strong note of sadness in the way it came out.

I think I understood her concern, “You have your doubts

about how Tom will take it?”

“Yes.” Amy was never one to look vulnerable, but she

looked lost as I watched her struggle with the possibilities.

“Is it enough to let it stop you from taking the job?” I asked, not really wanting to hear the answer, but wanting to know if she had the strength to stand-up to him yet.

“I…I don’t know.” Her smile had turned into a frown. Amy lowered her eyes to the newspaper lying on the table in front of her.

I reached my hand across the table and placed it on hers.

The feeling of touching her sent shivers throughout my body.

She felt it too and responded by sitting more erect in her chair—yet she didn’t move her hand. “If you want the job, it’s yours! I believe I have a way to bring you in…almost making it Tom’s idea.”

“You’ve been thinking about this before, haven’t you?” she asked, her face regaining her enthusiasm.

“Maybe once or twice,” I said, “and I believe you’ve been thinking about it too.” I squeezed her hand and then withdrew mine—before it became too obvious that I didn’t want too at all. “Ok, so what’s your plan?”

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“Does that mean you want the job?”

“More than anything!” she said and my heart did a leap—

frog in my chest. Her eyes bore right into mine, and I knew she was drawn to me also. I had to swallow hard. This was not my time and place, and I wouldn’t take advantage of her, no matter how close she was to being my Amy.

I fought down the urges and responded, “Now’s not the

time. Give me a couple of months to lay the foundation. I’ll let you know if I need you to do anything. I want it to happen as natural as it can. Tom is cunning, and I don’t want him to suspect anything at all. Most of all I don’t want him to think that you had any influence what-so-ever!”

“I don’t like the idea of doing things behind Tom’s back. I believe in honesty, not deceit!”

“Exactly my thoughts as well, that’s why I want to let

things progress in a natural way,” I responded. “I want you out of it; the only thing you have to keep secret is my tentatively asking if you wanted a job, in a roundabout way…not even a sure thing…lots could happen between now and then.” I let the smile broaden on my face.

“I get it. No culpability if you aren’t certain of the outcome.”

“You’ve got it!”

“One more thing,” she asked me, her voice sweet and low.

I could feel those familiar pangs racing throughout my body again as her voice tickled my memories, “Do you think you could pay me more than Tom?”

I exploded with laughter, and she joined in until the tears were streaming down both of our faces.

“I have one last question for you,” I asked, wiping away a stray tear from my cheek. “Why a dog…no less a Border collie, and how did you come up with the name?”

She looked away, and I wasn’t certain she was going to

say anything. Worse yet, I felt awful for destroying the festive S 264 S

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mood. She took a couple of moments and then answered, “I was kind of hoping that you wouldn’t ask.” She fingered her long hair behind her ear on one side and began to play with the ends on the other side of her face. After taking a deep sigh, she continued, “I’m not really sure, but it felt right. I woke up a couple of days ago after I had a pretty vivid dream. In it you were throwing a ball to a Border collie. It was somewhere out in the country. There was a small pond and you tossed the ball into the water. The dog hesitated, and you said, “Come on Emma, you can do it, don’t let it get away from you.”

If I hadn’t already believed in science fiction, and was a perfect example of living it, I sure did now. After Amy and I got married and bought the acreage, she had given me a Border collie as a “Welcome Home” gift. His name had been Bruce, not Emma. He was a rescue dog from the pound and not a

puppy. The comment from her dream was something I said

many times to Emily as she was growing up. I most often said it to her when she was getting frustrated and ready to give-up. I wanted so badly to explain to Amy what her dream had prophesied. I knew I couldn’t, not today, maybe someday—if at all.

I had to tell her something so I began, “I lost someone very special. Her name was Emily. It was a lifetime ago, and I never will get over it. I used to have a Border collie named Bruce and believe it or not, I once lived by a pond. I’m beginning to believe in ESP. I must have dreamt about them and sent it to you by dream-phone, courtesy of weird-out vibes Inc.”

She looked at me and tried to read the expression on my

face and decipher the tone of my voice. “You’re not serious are you? You’re just pulling my leg…right?”

“Sorry…it’s all true.”

“Wow! That’s just plain creepy. I felt so compelled to get you the puppy. I even tried to talk myself out of it, saying it was a dream, but this is way out there.”

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“Yep, that it is. But in case you’re wondering, you can’t have the dog back.” I shot her a grin, and she laughed. Just like it was with my Amy, she and I were becoming close friends.

She left my apartment around three-thirty. She and Tom

were going to his folks for Christmas Eve and then to her parent’s house on Christmas day. I was on the phone to my landlord fifteen minutes after she left. I let him know about the dog, and he threatened to evict me immediately. After a couple of minutes, we came to a short-term arrangement. I could keep the dog and search for a new place. In return, there would be a monetary concession of five-hundred dollars and no return of my original deposit. I readily agreed. I would have gladly paid more.

I debated about going to church service on Christmas Eve, but Emma was just too cute for me to leave alone. Amy’s comment about the pond had got me thinking. I didn’t need the ads anymore; I knew where I was going to buy. There was an old dilapidated house out in the country. It was just begging for a dog and his owner. It was only a few miles away from my parents to boot. I felt like my life was coming full circle and beginning to finally reconnect. I spent Christmas day by myself. I was exceedingly glad for Emma’s company. Without her playfulness, I think I would have succumbed to my personal loneliness.

CJ called in mid January and wanted to know if I needed

anyone to take a free, all-expense trip to Vegas. I asked if he was offering to pay, because I could sure use a vacation. I was rewarded with his laughter. I said, “Why not,” and we discussed options. There were still two playoff games left to determine the two teams for the Super bowl. I already knew who was going to win those games, and who the ultimate winner of the big game would be. CJ and I could make some extra money

because of the eventual outcome. The Redskins were going to S 266 S

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beat the Broncos by thirty-two, after being down ten-zip and punting every time they had the ball in the first quarter. When the flood gates opened, Denver wouldn’t know what hit them.

Doug Williams would toss four TD’s in the second quarter, and the Broncos never recovered. The point spread would allow us to do some strategic betting.

By the middle of February I deposited six point five million in my other (sheltered) accounts and three point six in my readily accessible accounts. CJ also informed me that someone else would have to make the trip to Vegas next time. He’d been courteously escorted out of town…so to speak. I didn’t ask for the details. It just made my gut feeling of the “Family”

all the stronger. It was another avenue I would need to tread lightly on. The sooner I could break free…if I could, the better I would be.

Stebben had nearly deciphered the components of the

phone by the end of April. He, Samuel, and Mark put in more hours than I asked of them. The best I could do was to keep the refrigerator full of Diet Coke and Mountain Dew. One part of the warehouse had been remolded, complete with walls, as a block of offices and a meeting room took shape. Stebben had a hide-a-bed in his larger office, while Mark and Samuel had resorted to cots and sleeping bags. Tom ragged on them daily about going home. Stebben would smile, nod, smile some more, until Tom would leave, always red in the face.

Tom had proven himself as a worthy designer. The auto—

mated machinery for mass production was moving beyond the planning stage. Mark was the one who made the most important breakthrough. He had begun to build a processing chip. It was much larger than the one from my phone and not nearly as complicated. Attempt after attempt to integrate it into a working computer had failed. Sometimes the simplest answer is right in front of your face. When they discussed it with me, S 267 S

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I fell into my child’s mode of understanding.

Samuel said it best. “Just because A works with B and B

works with C, doesn’t mean A is compatible with C.”

“I think I’ve got it, the chip is five times more powerful than the current chip, but it doesn’t work with all the current pieces which are lagging behind in technology, thereby causing nothing to work.”

“You’ve got it boss,” Mark tossed out at me. “I don’t know why I didn’t think about the motherboard before. I’m trying to send a river down a sewer pipe. Give me three weeks, and I believe I will have it up and running.”

“You do realize that in order for us to sell our new chip, we are going to have to sell all the other component changes we had to make as well.”

“That’s bad why exactly,” Stebben asked.

“It’s not. I was just making a point of reference and throwing it out there for discussion. Which component makes the most sense to market first,” I asked.

“Both…all,” Stebben answered back. “I think we should

sell the rights on the motherboard and market the chip.”

“Great idea! I’m sure you have a suggestion or two?”

“I do,” Stebben announced. “There is a small start-up company in California that is currently trying to do what we’ve just done…I mean…will do. I know one of the Research

and Development guys there. I believe we could get a meeting with the group, just by snapping our fingers, or waving a motherboard around.” Stebben’s entire face was lit up like a kid opening presents on his birthday.

“Get it up and working and we’ll come up with a plan of

attack.”

“On it!” the three of them nearly chimed in unison.

Over the past few weeks I’d been contemplating and putting my “Amy Comes to Work” plan together. She would be

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graduating from Iowa State University in a few weeks. When the moments had been right, I’d ask Tom to what companies Amy had been applying. His response was nearly always the same, “Not sure…don’t know…has to be one within driving

distance.”

I made conspicuous comments a time or two to the others, “I’ll be glad when we get to take this company to the next stage. I can’t wait to get out there and start hitting the marketing trail. I don’t know if I can do it on my own. Hopefully I can find someone competent soon.”

After awhile I could tell my obscure comments were beginning to sink in to Tom. One time, while several of us were eating lunch, I said to Samuel, “It’s going to be hard to bring in an outsider and expect them to be able to sell us without divulging too much insider information to them. I just wish I had a better handle on the publication and promotional side of things.”

Samuel was perfectly on cue, and he didn’t even know it,

“You ought to hire Tom’s wife. She’d be perfect.”

Tom never said a word, but I knew he heard my comment

and Samuel’s response. By the way he stood, with his head tilted slightly to the side, I could tell he was mulling the notion around in his head. I added, “That’s a good idea, but I’m sure Tom wouldn’t want Amy to work here, even If I was willing to pay her a small fortune to help take the load off of me.”

Two weeks before Amy graduated, Tom asked to see me

in private. He closed the door on the trailer. I still used it as my personal office and workspace. It was hard to explain; the trailer was comfortable to me and I could breathe easier in it for some reason. It might have been because no one else occupied it but me.

Tom started our conversation, “I was talking to Amy the