Authors: Stacy H. Pan
“Yes, I just didn’t think you were taking me with you,” I respond surprised.
“Of course you are going with me, in case I need anything. You can fetch me drinks and food and stuff.”
Of course that is why I am going. I am not going to socialize or to have fun. Bailey is my pure blood and it is my job to serve her.
On our way out, Bailey stops by Killian’s office to say goodbye. While we are in there, he receives a phone call and from the look on his face, it is not good news.
“What’s wrong, Daddy?” asks Bailey.
“One of our Enforcers has died during a training accident,” responds Killian with shock and sadness in his voice. “Tomorrow will be his clone’s draining.”
With that, my head darts up and I look at Killian, hoping for an explanation. Killian looks passed me and at Alec. “656 needs to go to it. She hasn’t witnessed one yet. And you will go with her,” Killian demands.
“Me?” questions Alec, his serious demeanor turning to shock. “Why me, sir?”
Killian places both hands on his desk and pushes himself up. “Are you questioning my orders?” asks Killian, the anger on his face growing as he rises out of his chair.
Alec immediately looks regretful for asking the question. I smirk a little. I can’t help but be amused by Alec’s discontent after the way he has spoken to me.
"No, sir. I just meant…I think I may be ill suited to take her. Maybe someone else should do it.”
“You’re my best Enforcer, Alec. She needs to be protected so she can provide blood to Bailey. I don’t want to have to pay for another clone because something happened to this one.” He looks at me. “She was expensive!” He looks back at Alec. “Tread carefully, Alec. Take heed to never question my orders again. It is never too late to send you back to where you came,” Killian threatens and I wonder what he meant.
“Yes, sir,” Alec says in defeat.
Killian looks at Bailey. “Bailey, you’re not going out tonight.”
“What? Why? I am expected to be at the party! Why can’t I go?”
“It’s too late, Bailey. There's a lot of unrest in the city right now. It's not safe for you to be out. You can have a party here tomorrow night."
“Ugh! You are such a life ruiner!” Bailey retorts as she storms out of the room.
Killian looks at me. “She’s a little dramatic,” he says. "You should go get some rest.”
I nod and turn to walk out the door. On the way out, I glance in Alec’s direction. He glares at me intimidatingly. An intense feeling of caution overwhelms me. The last thing I need right now is an Enforcer being angry with me. I have seen what they can do and I get the feeling that Alec is no different.
I get back to my room and there is a plate of food on my dresser. It is at that moment that I realize that I am ravenous, as I have not eaten anything today. Once I make the food disappear, I lay on my bed, my eyes heavy with exhaustion. My mind begins to wander and I try to sort through all of the confusion of the last twenty-four hours. My mind is stuck on one thing. The draining. What is it? Why do I have to go? Why do I need protection? I am not sure what kind of protection I am going to receive from someone who obviously doesn’t like me. If there is one thing I know for sure, it is that I can’t count on anyone. The only person I can rely own to take care of me is me. I am my own protection. With that thought, my eyes close and I can fight sleep no longer.
I am laying in the dark, unable to move, a numbness encompassing my entire body. I try to move my arms and legs, but nothing happens. I try to open my eyes to see if there is light, however, my eyes are so heavy from grogginess that I decide to leave them closed. Where am I? Why can I not move? I hear the muffled voices of a man and woman standing close by. I try to make out what they are saying, but my head is so groggy, it is a difficult task to muster. I wonder if they can tell that I am awake. I try to speak, to ask them where I am and what is going on, but no words come out of my mouth. I have such a strange feeling, like I am conscious, but outside of my body, unable to make it respond to my mental commands. Concentrating on the voices, I will myself to hear the words being spoken.
“It’s really strange. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but there’s something different about her. Something different about her blood. I’ve never seen anything like it before,” the woman’s voice says. The tone of her voice sounds awfully familiar, but I can’t place it.
“Does she have the compound we are looking for?” the male voice asks. His voice has a familiar ring to it as well.
“No, sir. But I think we should run more tests,” the woman argues.
“If she doesn’t have the compound, then you are wasting time by running more tests,” the male voice sounds angry. “There are more clones who need to be checked before they can be released. Maybe you should concentrate on testing them instead of wasting time we don’t have.”
“But sir---”
“Did I not make myself clear? If you are incapable of fulfilling your end of the bargain, then I will find someone else. You are not irreplaceable, Dr. Kendall. There are others who would love to fill the spot as leader of the Researcher sector. Do you understand?” the man asks with authority.
“Yes, Killian. I understand perfectly,” Dr. Kendall says, defeated. Heavy footsteps get further away from where I am and I know Killian is gone. I can feel the presence of the Dr. Kendall hovering over me. “What are you?” she whispers before walking away.
The next morning, I wake feeling fully rested. I must have been exhausted to have slept so well my first night here. I don’t wake happy and energetic the way one should when they have had a full night’s sleep. Instead, I feel confused. My dream felt so real. I felt like I was outside of my body, unable to see what was going on, but could hear the voices of Dr. Kendall and Killian speaking.
Maybe a shower will wake me up more and clear my head. Getting out of bed, I walk to the bathroom and turn on the water. When it is the right temperature, I undress and climb in. I stand under the warm water for a few minutes and just let it cover me like a blanket. The warmth feels so good as it cleanses my body. Just for a moment, it feels like this water has the power to wash away all the confusion in my life, to wash away everything I have seen so far. That would be a welcome relief right now. I will never forget the suffering I have seen and how it made me feel. No matter how many showers I take, those images will never be washed from my mind. Waking to my flesh being burned, watching the old man get his hand sawed off, the screaming boy on the floor in the fetal position as Roderick used his aleuron on him; all these images will forever be imprinted in my memory.
I put on my red clothes, the only color I will ever be permitted to wear and braid my hair to keep it maintained. Now, I am not sure what to do. Bailey still has not given me any type of instruction. I pick up the plate that housed my food last night and head in the direction of the kitchen. On my way, I run into Zareh.
“Good morning, 656.” Zareh says in a chipper voice. “I hope you slept well.”
“I did, thank you.”
“I am just going to get some breakfast. Are you hungry?” she asks.
“Yes. I am starving!” I say.
Zareh leads the way to the kitchen. I pay attention to every turn we make and door we pass through. It is going to take me some time to navigate through such a big place. I try to find some kind of landmark in every hallway that will help me find my way in the future, but every picture, decoration, or wall paper starts to run together and I am more confused now than before we started our walk.
Finally we enter a huge kitchen. It should be big for the amount of people this house can hold. A young man is stirring something in a pot on the stove when we walk in. He glances in our direction.
“Good morning, Zareh! You are looking beautiful today, as always.” He turns around and flashes a big smile that shows off his white straight teeth.
“Oh Milo, you’re such a charmer!” she says with a chuckle. “You might want to have your eyes checked, though. I haven’t been beautiful in quite some time. Have you met Enforcer-656?” she asks.
Milo turns around to face me. His lack of red tells me he is a pure blood. He is a handsome young man with dark eyes and a dark complexion. There is something familiar about his smile.
“I have not had the pleasure.” he replies. He smiles and extends his hand to me. On his wrist, he bears the same tattoo as Zareh and I know that he belongs to the Laborer sector. I am taken aback by his politeness. I take his hand and shake it firmly.
“I’m Milo. I’m one of the cooks here at the Buchanan house.”
“It’s nice to meet you,” I say.
“Likewise. Did you enjoy your dinner last night?” he asks.
“That was you?” I ask surprised.
“I figured you might be hungry,” he says with a smile.
“It was delicious. Thank you!”
“You should go get something to eat before Bailey starts looking for you,” he says.
Zareh leads me into another room that is connected to the kitchen. It consists of one long table lined with chairs on both sides. There are people already sitting at the table eating their breakfast. They all wear red. Some of them look familiar and some do not.
“This is where all the workers eat, clones and pure bloods alike,” Zareh says.
No one had noticed us until Zareh spoke. All of a sudden, all eyes are on me. No one says anything to me or asks my name. I guess I need no introduction. Everyone already knows who I am.
We take a seat at the end of the table next to some people who wear red.
"Everyone, this is Enforcer-656," Zareh says. She makes some introductions, but that is the extent of the conversation. No one, but Zareh, seems interested in talking to me.
Zareh stops talking abruptly when she notices someone else has walked into the room. I recognize him immediately. It is Killian, though his red clothes tell me that he is not. He looks in our direction, but doesn’t say anything. He sits down at the opposite end of the table where no one else is sitting and begins to eat his breakfast.
“Why doesn’t he sit with us?” I ask Zareh. Before she can speak, my question is answered by a familiar voice behind me.
"He thinks he is better than us," I hear a male voice say. I turn around and see yet another familiar face, Alec. Only it is not Alec. Although he wears the same features on his face as Alec, his hair is much longer and untamed than his pure blood’s short cut. Long strands of hair hang down on each side of his face at the level of his dark brown eyes. Of course, his uniform is red, like the rest of us. However, the way he distances himself from the workers, gives me the impression that he is somewhat of a loner.
The Alec lookalike is leaning against the wall. He has one leg bent with his foot propped on the wall. He bites into the deep red apple that has the color of blood and clashes with his bright red uniform.
"He doesn't associate with us because he is Killian's clone," Alec's lookalike says between mouthfuls of apple. He looks at me with hard eyes. "It's like he thinks he is human."
"Hush your mouth, Enforcer-497," Zareh says angrily.
My first impression of Enforcer-497 is just as good as my impression of Alec. They have the same demeanor. Even though Enforcer-497 seems to be relaxed, the tightness of his jaw tells me that he is on guard. He reminds me of a cat waiting for his prey so he can pounce and shred the poor small animal apart. Or in this case, Killian's duplicate. Much to Enforcer-497’s disappointment, Killian's copy does not give him the chance. He sits at the other end of the table and quietly eats his breakfast while Enforcer-497 takes another bite of apple. I can’t help but wonder if some sort of unpleasant discourse occurred between them in the past.
Zareh leans in close to me and looks in the direction of the man who looks like Killian. "I know you recognize him as Killian's clone, but we call him Enforcer-150, or just 150," she says in a low whisper.
"Why doesn't he sit with us?" I ask her.
"The other workers and clones are afraid to befriend him. They fear that he will tell Killian about their conversations, work habits, or personalities. The pure bloods fear for their jobs and the clones fear for their lives."
"Why would anyone fear for their lives? Killian doesn't seem like a bad man. If everyone just does what they are supposed to do, then everything will be fine," I say with reassurance in my voice, though I am not sure if I am trying to reassure her or myself.
"Of course he is not a bad man dear," she says in defense of Killian. "People can just be so judgmental.”
I look at Enforcer-150. He eats a muffin quietly and carefully, as to not drop a crumb. He looks up and glances in my direction. For a few seconds our eyes meet. His eyes are not hard and focused like Killian's. They are soft and I sense sadness in them. In that moment, I feel bad for him. It must be so lonely to live your life as someone who is not seen as a human and who is also rejected by his peers. He is utterly and completely alone in this place. I think about my own circumstances and I feel grateful. So far, I have been shown kindness by Alden, Zareh, and Milo. While I am sure I will have enemies, at least, for now, I like to think that I also have allies. From the looks of it, allies are something Enforcer-150 will never have. He averts his eyes back to his muffin and continues to eat.
After breakfast, Zareh takes me to Bailey's room and then goes about her duties. Bailey is sitting at her vanity when we walk in the room. She is wearing a pink silk robe and is applying lipstick to her already pink lips. Her shorter golden hair is perfectly brushed. Her makeup-caked face looks as though it will melt right off if she were to step anywhere near a source of heat. I am glad I do not mess with that stuff and I hope Bailey never requires me to wear it.
"Good. You're here!" Bailey says through puckered lips. She is now applying lip-gloss on top of her lipstick. "We have a lot to do today. Tonight is my birthday party, so we have got to prepare. I'll need you to run some errands. Everything has to be perfect and…” She is interrupted by a knock at the door.
She opens it to find Alec standing there. She looks pleasantly surprised to see him outside her bedroom door.
"I'm sorry to interrupt, Miss Bailey, but I..."
"Don't be sorry, Alec," Bailey interrupts. "You are always welcome in my room." She flashes him a flirtatious smile and a wink. "To what do we owe this pleasure? I was just getting ready to get dressed for the day." She unties her silk robe and lets it fall to the floor. She is wearing a pale pink tank top with matching shorts so short that her rear is almost hanging out. Alec's expression does not change. I can tell all of Bailey's efforts are in vain. Alec is not impressed with her. If anything, he is completely annoyed by her.
"I am here to collect 656," Alec responds with annoyance in his voice.
"Why?" asks Bailey.
"She has to attend the draining today."
"But I need her! There is so much to do before the party. I can't possibly do it all by myself," whines Bailey.
"It's your father's orders," responds Alec, unmoved by her whining.
Bailey crosses her arms and sticks out her lower lip in defeat. As much as I haven’t enjoyed my encounters with Alec, I am thankful to get away from Bailey. I follow Alec outside and board the same MR2 that brought me to the mansion the day before.
We are in the MR2 for about ten minutes before it parks itself in some kind of bubble parking garage. Alec kills the power to the floating bubble and tells me that we have to walk the rest of the way.
We exit the garage and see crowds of people everywhere. The street is full of colors, not just red. Alec and I start walking in the direction of a hoard of people. Much to my dismay, I stay close to Alec so I do not get lost. Vendors are everywhere selling food and merchandise. People are performing tricks. Children run past us laughing and carrying popsicles. A puppet show is entertaining a group of children. They are mesmerized by every movement each puppet makes. It almost looks like a festival. Why would Killian want me to attend something so festive?
A little girl sits on a stoop watching the festivities. She can’t be more than five years old. She is petite and has long strawberry blonde hair. A woman comes out and sits beside her. She looks like an older version of the little girl, probably her mother. The little girl smiles and climbs into her lap. The woman wraps her arms around the little girl's waist and plants a kiss on her cheek. Is that what it's like to be loved? To have a mother? I watch the children around me playing. They all seem so happy. So perfect. I wonder if childhood is like this for everyone. This is something I will never know. Childhood was denied to me. All I can do is imagine what my life had been like as a child. Imagine what it is like to be loved, to feel arms around me keeping me safe. I wonder if it possible to miss something you have never had.