Relish: A Vicious Feast Book 2 (2 page)

Luka Visraya—the handsome rock god that I carelessly let into my heart. I deserved the pulsing pain in my chest. I knew better and yet I didn’t listen to my gut. I ignored all the red flags. Of course he was in love with someone else. Of course!

I let a tear fall when the scene of Luka singing to me while I lay “asleep” on a concrete slab came on. I should have known the whole song was a metaphor for his love for Phoenix. How she’d become poison in his veins after she left him for Demitri. The dress with the feathers should have tipped me off too. Phoenix equaled bird that flew out of the ashes, the very tattoo Luka had inked all over his back. Ugh! I hated myself.

“I’m beginning to think you can’t start your day without watching that stupid video.”

Exhaling a shuddering breath, I closed my eye just as Luka leaned in to kiss me. I used my knee to hide any evidence of my hurt, transferring the dampness on my cheek there. I sniffed then sat up straighter.

“It’s not a stupid video,” I said, looking up at the classically handsome guy with bed head grinning down at me. His large hand rubbed between my shoulder blades as if he knew of the knot there that needed easing.

“Just because you’re in it.” He bent and claimed my lips. I tasted the coffee with its cream and sugar on his tongue. I grimaced and pushed him away playfully.

“You put way too much sugar in your coffee, Larry.”

Yes. I rebounded on Laurel Hardy, the editor-in-chief of the Daily Gossip, our ironically named college paper. I’d insisted on no strings attached and he’d agreed. Now he spent most nights at my apartment, and I let him because I couldn’t stand sleeping alone. The dreams…I shook my head. I needed someone to be there when I woke up. I needed the warmth of another body beside me, the feel of hands on my body, the oblivion an orgasm brought. I got all of that from Larry for the low, low price of $9.99. Figuratively speaking, of course. 

Another thing to hate Luka for. In thirty days, he’d made me codependent. The guilt of using Larry for my comfort twisted my insides. Larry knew this. I’d made it clear from the start. Still he stayed. I got the feeling he suspected my recklessness with his feelings came from my stay with Vicious. He’d been the one to help me negotiate the terms of the NDA, so when I came back broken he must have put the two together.

Larry snorted at my criticism of his taste in morning pick-me-ups. “Miss Sweet Tooth? I don’t get why you’re drinking your coffee straight up these days. You used to put at least three packets of the white stuff in your mug.”

“Don’t make me sound like a sugar addict.” I stared into the dregs of my cup. In the background, the video had ended, displaying smaller screens featuring other Vicious music videos. I curled my fingers into my palm to suppress the need to click Replay.

“Alright,” he sighed out, smoothing down my hair in a sweet caress. “I get it. I won’t push.”

“Thanks,” I mumbled, not really feeling the gratitude today. That fucking dream, man, it messed something up in me.

“Want another cup?”

I offered him my mug, doing my best Oliver Twist impression. He chuckled and sauntered to my kitchen in just his boxers. I took a second to admire his ass before minimizing the YouTube browser. I cued up my photo manipulation software, ready for another long day.

“Why are you up so early anyway? It’s not even six,” I asked as I pulled up one of Dray’s splatter drumming photos. I’d been tweaking the tinting for the past two days. I needed to get it right soon or I wouldn’t have time for the rest of the photos before I had to bring them to Eddy’s for framing.

“I have to head to the library before my first class and check out a couple of law books for my debate this week,” Larry replied over his shoulder. He puttered about in the kitchen and soon the sizzle of eggs and the scent of cooking bacon reached me. “How’s the project going?”

“Slow.” I grumbled curses under my breath. 

The Spring Showcase opened the first of March and ran a week. Then I would have to defend my introspective to a panel consisting of the dean and several photography luminaries. My heartbeat sped up from zero to sixty at the thought. I had a week to finish everything. Framing took another week, and that was cutting it close because Eddy loved me. He wouldn’t do anyone else that kind of favor. I’d frame the pictures myself if I didn’t have to write the stupid paper that went with the pictures. In ten pages I needed to explain the theme behind the introspective and my driving force for the images. I could actually feel time slipping between my fingers. I had so much to do.

“I get that you want the pictures to turn out perfect, but at some point you need to let go and let your talent speak for itself.”

“Easy for you to say,” I muttered.

“I heard that.”

I didn’t flinch at the admonition in Larry’s tone. He’d already been accepted to several of the top law schools in the country. He had his pick, so I found it hypocritical of him to tell me to let go when he poured over countless pro and con lists every night. I kept telling him to pick one already. Did he listen to me? About as much as I listened to him.

“Come on.” He waved me over to the table he’d set. “You get cranky and attack my lists when you’re hungry.”

Chagrined at being called out for speaking my mind, I pushed away from my desk and shuffled the couple of feet to the kitchen. “Aren’t you cold walking around without a robe on?” I pulled out a chair before he could pull it out for me and flopped down. I had a strip of bacon in my mouth by the time Larry replied.

“I’m taking one for the team.” He treated me to a half-smile. “I know how much you like staring at my ass…sets.”

I threw my bacon at him. It bounced off his chest to land on his lap. He picked it up and popped it into his mouth, still grinning. I chugged half my second cup of coffee when Larry’s next question caused me to swallow wrong.

“What?” I sputtered, swiping coffee off my chin.

He rolled his eyes at me. “Don’t pretend like you didn’t hear me.”

“I did hear you, hence the choking.” I pushed my half-eaten breakfast away. “You know this thing between us isn’t anything.”

For a second I thought I noticed hurt in his eyes before he blinked it away. “What does having dinner out once in a while have to do with what we have?”

“What you have in mind sounds awfully like a date to me.” I ignored my conscience reprimanding me for being a cold bitch. Yes, I was going to hell for what I was putting Larry through. I should really just cut him loose, but my mental instability wouldn’t let me. I had to get through these two weeks in one piece if I wanted to graduate. I needed him to get me through. “I’m not ready for that.”

“It’s just dinner.” He played off his seriousness by shrugging nonchalantly.

“I know you.” I sighed. “I know that dinner isn’t just dinner for you. This,” I gestured at him and me, “can’t go any further than what we have. After I graduate I’m off to travel the world and you’ll be in law school.”

The relaxed air around him dissipated the second tension entered his shoulders. “Then maybe we should break things off now. I mean, it’s headed that way from what you’re telling me, right?”

I flinched. Bingo. Shoving my rising panic down, I reached for his hand across the table, but he moved it away. “Laurel.”

“Don’t ‘Laurel’ me.” He pushed away from the table and stood up. It was hard to take him seriously in just his boxers, but I bit down on the joke begging to leave my lips. Not a time to be funny. “I get that you can’t talk about what happened to you last year, but it’s clear you didn’t get out unscathed. I see the hurt on your face and it kills me that I can’t do anything about it.”

“Whatever you’re thinking, it’s not like that.”

“You call out his name in your sleep.”

“What?” I covered my mouth with both hands. “That’s not possible.”

Larry raked trembling fingers through his brown hair. “I woke up to take a leak and when I got back you were moaning his name.”

“I don’t believe you.” I stood up, unwilling to continue this conversation looking up at him.

“Do you love him?”

The step back I took at the question was completely unconscious. “No.”

Lips set into a tight line, Larry turned around and stomped back into the bedroom.

“What are you doing?” I followed after him.

Larry pulled on his jeans, his eyes scanning the floor. “Where are my boots?”

He asked, but something told me he didn’t aim the question at me. “Larry, please, don’t do this. Don’t leave angry like this. It’s Snowmageddon out there. God knows when I’ll see you again.”

“Yeah?” He yanked his sweater over his head, ignoring my attempt at lightening the mood. “How can I not when I’m sleeping with someone who clearly has the hots for someone else?”

“That’s not fair. He’s a rock star, someone out of my league. It’s not like there’s a chance that I’ll cheat on you with him.”

“See…the fact that you have to defend yourself is what makes this whole thing so much worse.” He wrapped the scarf I’d given him for a belated Christmas present around his neck.

I hugged myself, feeling the cold inside my chest expand. “Larry…I…”

“Look,” he took a steadying breath, “Snowmaggedon or not, I’ll be at Pot Luck tonight at eight. If you’re not there to have dinner with me then I’ll have my answer.”

Because of the ultimatum he’d dropped on me, I could barely move out of the way when he left the bedroom. Stunned into silence, my gaze followed him to the living room as he sat on the couch to lace up his boots. Another image entered my mind—one of a blond sitting relaxed and tapping out a beat. The ice inside my chest spread to my belly. I opened my mouth to say something, but words failed me. Larry picked up his book bag and left the apartment without looking back.

The slamming door became the soundtrack to my morning, reminding me of how messed up my life had become.

Stupid Luka.

C
HAPTER
T
WO
U
SER

By the end of the day, I’d worn down my nails to bloody stumps. I barely moved from my spot in front of my computer. Hour after hour I thought of ways to appease Larry. Imagining a night without him in my bed scared the shit out of me. We didn’t even need to have sex. I just needed another warm body there, someone to hold on to in case things got too intense in my head to handle.

I’d lost precious time worrying over our argument. The pictures in my gallery lay untouched. After Larry left, I took a shower to chase away the chill, but as soon as I sat down to work, I couldn’t concentrate. Fear of losing my edge pushed me to pace my tiny living room. I avoided looking at the couch because a mere glance led to thoughts of Googling
him
and finding out where the band played next in their tour.

Helsinki.

“Damn it!” I gnawed on what was left of my thumb nail. Having their schedule memorized reinforced my current pathetic state. No matter how painful each beat of my heart became, I continued to stalk the band. The hackers Yana employed kept news of Vicious to a minimum. Only things she’d approved made it into the web. The lack of information killed me. I listened to their songs on a loop while working on the pictures. I obsessed about what each member could be doing. Add a wall of pictures, news clippings, and string connecting everything together, and I would be
that
fan. 

The sun had set hours ago when I finally slumped on my couch. Exhaustion beat down my shoulders. The worst part was if I closed my eye and concentrated hard enough I could still smell his sweet spicy scent on the cushions. Luka had cast a spell on me that I couldn’t break. Maybe I wanted to return to my normal life so much that I failed to see the truth. My life would never be normal again. Living with Vicious did that.

The thought practically killed me inside.

I leaned my head over the edge of the couch until I caught sight of my digital clock. If I got up now and waded my way through the snow, I would make it to Pot Luck in time. A decision had to be made. Rebounding on Larry wasn’t fair to him. He’d been nothing but good to me. The guy deserved better. Thinking I could put myself back together with his help screamed desperation. I’d reached a whole new low and it scared me to my feet. I grabbed my heavy jacket off the hook on the wall and shrugged it on.

At the door, I paused and considered bringing my camera along. I hadn’t taken a picture since New Year’s Eve. It pained me like losing a limb. Luka couldn’t take that away from me either. If I wanted to survive this, I had to do something.

Heart filled with determination, I opened the door to my apartment. The camera could wait, facing Larry couldn’t.

***

All the cool kids gathered at Pot Luck. Having the best burgers attracted the artists, the nerds, and the jocks alike. For a snowy Monday, the place was packed to the walls. I stomped in, yanking off my beany and shrugging off freshly fallen snow. It fell about a block to the restaurant and made my journey all the more uncomfortable. I only hoped I wouldn’t get sick. A cold now would be the cherry on my chocolate sundae from hell.

I needed a drink!

Removing my gloves then jacket, I scanned the crowd for Larry. No one had to wait to be seated at Pot Luck. For nights when the place was full, grabbing a table became a nasty game of musical chairs. Survival of the fittest. Stand up for even a second and you lost your table.

Waitresses balanced trays above their heads just so they could navigate the crowd. I silently thanked the wall-to-wall body heat thawing my bonesickles. I stood on my tiptoes, but only got a sore neck from craning to pick out Larry’s soft brown locks from the huddled masses. He was here. A-type personality Larry always arrived on time. I felt his good breeding emanating from somewhere in the dining room.

Using my arms, I swam through the crowd. Conversation stopped when I passed. I attributed it to the shock of seeing my patch for the first time. Nothing worth acknowledging. Been there, done that. Stare all you want, folks.

I elbowed my way between two sorority sisters and finally spotted Larry in one of the coveted booths. He munched on a fry like the piece of potato mattered more than passing the BAR. I recognized the crease on his forehead and the valley his eyebrows pushing together created. The Dragon had emerged, which meant Larry was doubly lethal. His brooding caught the attention of women within staring distance.