Read Relentless Hope (Resilient Hearts) Online
Authors: Ashley Cassidy
The only place with a roof I could potentially sleep at tonight is a homeless shelter, but the mere thought of that makes my stomach roil in fear. I did some internet searching about homeless shelters the other day and what I read about them was terrifying. From being infested with bed bugs and lice, to the amount of drugs and the number of drugs lords lurking around, to incidents of rape and sexual assault, the stories are more horrific than I care to recount. I can’t bring myself to go to a homeless shelter, and I have no other options. Finding David
was
my last hope. My last option.
As I continue looking around for David for about two more hours, all traces of hope gradually leave, and in their place, emptiness slowly takes hold. The recognition that I am now homeless makes me feel numb. It’s as if my mind cannot bear to face the reality, and my body refuses to accept it. The only thought playing in my mind over and over again is that I WILL NOT…CANNOT let myself sleep on the streets tonight. With this mantra taking hold in my mind, I notice my legs pointing me in a certain direction and carrying me there, while my mind is blank.
Before I know what I am doing, I find myself in front of the bench I was sitting at last week and my legs are carrying me over the railing towards the edge of the cliff. I stand there at the precipice looking out towards the ocean and imagine myself flying away, away from all the pain, the despair, the disappointments and the hopelessness.
Getting away from it all has never appealed so much. At a certain level deep in my consciousness, I realize that this is wrong, but I am too exhausted, and my mind is too convoluted to care. I close my eyes and envision jumping, falling down, and then hitting the rocky cliffs at the bottom. This time, instead of feeling terrified, the visualization makes me feel relieved. It feels like an end to all my misery, a final stop to all the uncertainty, anxiety and despair consuming my life.
As I feel myself getting more and more pulled towards the direction of the ocean, I hear the sound of screeching tires and a sudden braking of a car in the distant, but I pay very little attention to it. I am in a zone. One in which reality is quickly giving way to delusion. I hear heavy footsteps followed by someone yelling about something, but I am still too much in my own head to care. Finally, when I feel someone coming up behind me and grabbing my hand, I jerk around.
“Miss, what are doing? Why are you on the other side of the fence?” the guy asks in between shallow breaths. Why does he look like he has been sprinting?
“This is dangerous. Please let me help you climb over to this side.”
I turn around completely to see who he is and when I do a feeling of déjà vu hits me. It was only a week ago that I was standing in this exact position under similar circumstances. I can’t help to think there is a connection between these events, and when I turn my head to the side to get a better look at the guy, my jaw drops.
A black Bentley is parked across the curb with the passenger door hanging open and David is slowly making his way towards me. I take another look at the guy talking to me to try to figure out the connection. He’s a large towering man, tall with broad shoulders and a strong physical built. He looks like a bodyguard, someone in his thirties. I look down and notice that he is still holding my hand. I try to pull my hand away, but he only tightens his hold.
“Please, Miss. Please climb over to this side of the railing and I promise to let go of your hand.” Since it doesn’t look like he is going to give up easily, I decide to listen to him. Once I am safely on the other side, he lets go of my hand. By then David catches up to us. He looks closely at me and I can tell he instantly recognizes me.
“I thought that it was you. I can’t see too well from a distance, and I was
really
hoping that it wasn’t you, but I had a feeling it was you.” He pauses to take a breath before asking, “Why are you here again? Has it even been a week since we had that conversation?”
I look up and move my eyes between the younger guy and David. I do want to answer David, but I really don’t feel comfortable talking about my situation in front of another stranger. David seems to sense my hesitation. He turns toward the other guy. “Nick. Thanks for your help. I think I got it from here. Can you please wait in the car? I’ll let you know when I need you.” Nick nods his head and quickly walks toward the car and away from us.
After he’s sure Nick is out of earshot, David turns to me, “So tell me why you are here again. Why did we find you on the edge of the cliffs again so soon?”
I hesitate for a moment, thinking about what to tell him, and decide being honest and open right now is the best course of action. I tell him the whole story, starting with how my mom told me I had to leave our house immediately. I tell him about what happened at Mia’s apartment, and how I’ve been desperately attempting ever since to find a job and a place to stay at with no luck.
I also tell him that I called him and when I didn’t hear back, I spent the last of my money to come here to try to find him as a last resort. When I mention that I called him, his wrinkly face turns pale, as he quickly asks, “Which phone number did I give you?”
“You gave me your business card. I called the number on the card,” I respond.
He looks sincerely remorseful as he turns his head to look over the water. “That was the wrong number to give you. That’s my business cell phone number. I only check that occasionally these days. My brain isn’t functioning well anymore… I’m sorry. I’m so glad you decided to come here and we drove by when we did. If something had happened to you, I would have been responsible.”
I gasp at his words, shocked that he would think such a thing. “How would
you
have been responsible? My family is the one that put me in this position. If anyone would be responsible, it would be them and all the friends who abandoned me. You have no responsibility towards me... I mean, don’t get me wrong, I really appreciate that you’ve offered to help, but to think that you’re responsible for me is too big of a stretch.”
He is quiet for a few moments, seemingly lost in his thoughts before he responds. “You’re wrong. I would have been responsible. Not as a source of your problems, but for having the ability to help and not doing anything about it. There is a reason for everything, and it’s not accidental that I happened to pass by this place at exactly the same time as you were here, hanging on by a thread,
twice
in one week. I was placed here to give you a helping hand.”
He takes a deep breath, then opens his mouth to say something, but closes it again. I realize he is struggling with whether or not he should tell me something. He stays silent for another few minutes, and I decide to follow course to give him time to come to terms with whatever he is besieged by.
After what feels like forever, he raises his head and says in a whispering voice, “You may think you were fortunate to run into me when you did, but I believe it was my luck. I…I’ve lived a very selfish life. I’m not proud of the way I’ve treated people around me my whole life...and I don’t have a lot of time left. I think coming across you was an opportunity...a last chance given to me by the universe to do something good for somebody else to make up for some of my sins. If I had lost this chance because I couldn’t get my head together enough to give you the right phone number, it would have been my loss, and the results my responsibility.”
He takes a shaky breath and a small smile crosses his old face. “I’m really glad it didn’t come to that, and now we can talk about moving forward with the future. I promise I will help you. I don’t believe in handouts, so don’t expect that from me, but I will make sure you’re given ample opportunities to not only stand on your own feet, but also succeed. If you are willing to work hard, which I think you are, I guarantee you will thrive.”
I release a breath I had been holding, and a warm soft feeling gradually moves its way up my chest. I recognize it as hope, welcoming it warmly. I am still hesitant to get excited in fear that my hopes will be crushed again, but I let myself feel relieved as I return his smile.
“I promise I will work hard. I’ve worked hard all my life, and now after becoming almost homeless, I’m extremely grateful for any opportunity given to me and I will make sure to do whatever it takes to use it.”
“I know you will. I have no doubt.”
David checks his watch at this moment, as if he’s suddenly remembered something he was supposed to do. When he sees the time, he turns his head towards the car, and looks in between the car and me for a few seconds, appearing conflicted. After a moment, he seems to make up his mind.
“I need to get back home to take my medicine. I will send Nick back to take you to a hotel for the night, after he drops me off. Will you promise to stay here and not do anything stupid until he comes back?”
My face turns red at the realization that he feels the need to make sure I won’t kill myself in the few minutes it takes the driver to come back. I feel deeply embarrassed by my earlier behavior, so I jump to explain. “Of course. I promise. I am not suicidal. The only reason I was even contemplating that was because I’m too terrified of living on the streets and I felt I had no other options. Now that you’ve offered to help me, there is no reason for me to even consider that.”
He nods his head seeming satisfied by my answer.
“Okay. Wait here. Nick will be back shortly. Get some rest tonight. I will send him back for you t
omorrow morning once I find a job for you. We can talk about anything else you need then,” he says before turning his back and slowly pivoting his way towards the car.
Before he gets too far, I run up to him. “Mr. Pierson− I want you to know how much I appreciate this. I’m beyond grateful and really hope I can pay you back one day.”
He turns slowly around. “First of all, you can call me David. Secondly, you don’t need to pay me back. Like I said, this is as much an opportunity for me as it is for you. You can pay me back by making the most out of your life.”
I nod my head and wish him good night. As I watch him climb into the car, I ponder about what he said, and realize that even though I don’t know much about his life or why he feels this encounter is an opportunity for him, I recognize there is a significance to our meeting. It is too unlikely that he would be randomly passing by twice at exactly the same moment I was standing on the edge of the cliff contemplating ending my life.
I have never been a believer in destiny, but as I stand there staring at the wretched spot I was about to jump from, I realize deep in my soul that fate must have had a hand in this encounter. I try to wrap my head around what this could mean and imagine what life could have in store for me, and suddenly I feel a premonition of more dark days ahead. I swallow hard, blinking away the tears that unexpectedly appear, and try to change my train of thought, focusing on the positive instead.
Nick gets back in less than fifteen minutes. He jumps out of the
car
trying to open the door for me, but I beat him to it and hop in. I don’t want him to think he has to treat me like royalty. I am grateful as it is just to have a ride and a place to stay tonight.
He is quiet on the way to the hotel and I silently thank God for that. I still feel embarrassed at the situation Nick found me in earlier today and I really don’t know what to say to him. About ten minutes later, he pulls toward the entrance of a beautiful hotel. The entrance looks grand, and the place screams luxury.
Nick walks to the registration desk with me and starts talking to the lady behind the counter.
“I made a reservation under Mr. Pierson’s name a few minutes ago. Miss…?” He pauses, turning his questioning eyes to me.
“Aleah. Aleah Lateef,” I say quickly.
“Yes, Miss Lateef will be staying in the room.” He then continues to finish the check-in process, handing a black American Express card to the lady when she asks for a credit card.
After I have the room key in my hand, Nick turns to me to give me a piece of paper.
“This is for you. It has Mr. Pierson’s personal cell phone number and my cell number on it. Feel free to call me anytime with anything you need. I will give you a call tomorrow morning to let you know when I will be picking you up. Do you have any questions or need anything else tonight?”
“No, thank you. I appreciate all your help. See you tomorrow.”
“See ya.”
I make my way slowly to my room for the night, admiring the beautiful décor around the hotel as I go. Once I open the door to the room and see the stunning view of the ocean out of the floor to ceiling windows, my mouth falls open. I have never been to a hotel room this nice. A look over to the luxurious looking bed brings a huge smile to my face. I walk to the edge of the bed and jump up, taking my shoes off quickly. I lie on my back closing my eyes and enjoying the plush bedding. I am so exhausted from the events of the day that I don’t even bother changing my clothes. I get under the covers and fall instantly asleep.
The sound of a telephone ringing wakes me up,
but
I am too sleepy and disoriented to figure out exactly where it is coming from. I open my eyes and look around trying to make out where I am and it suddenly hits me. I jump up and pick up the phone before it stops ringing. Nick’s chipper voice greets me on the other end.
“Good morning. I hope you slept well. Can you be ready in about thirty minutes? Mr. Pierson wants to meet with you at ten o’clock and I want to pick you up half an hour before to give us plenty of time to get there.”
I look at the alarm clock on the side of the bed and realize it’s a little past nine. I can’t remember the last time I slept so late. The exhaustion of the past few days must have caught up with me, but I feel relaxed and refreshed now.
“Good morning Nick. Of course, I’ll be at the front entrance in thirty minutes. See you then.”
As soon as I hang up the phone, I run up to the bathroom to take a quick shower. Thirty minutes is really not enough time to shower and get ready for a girl, but I don’t want to sound whinny and ungrateful, so I rush through and make it downstairs exactly on time. As I start walking out the front door, I notice Nick pulling up towards the entrance.
Except for exchanging basic pleasantries, Nick and I keep mostly quiet on the way to David’s house. I look around and try to admire the beautiful views, and soon notice that we are pulling up to an iron gate. Nick pulls the car up close to the gate and it opens auto
-matically. He then drives up along a curvy driveway lined with tall trees until we come across a circular driveway complete with a marble fountain bubbling with water in the center.
The house looks huge. I have never been inside a mansion like this. Seeing the enormous estate makes me realize exactly how rich David is and the realization is quite intimidating. My stomach flutters and I feel nerves taking over, but I keep my head up and try to keep my legs steady as I make my way to the entrance. A sweet middle-aged lady who introduces herself as Maria opens the door before I have a chance to knock and greets me warmly, asking me to follow her to Mr. Pierson’s study.
We pause at the door to knock and she lets me in and closes the door behind me when David asks me to come in. The room they call a study is larger than the entire first floor of my parent’s house. The walls are lined with shelves full of books and there is a huge mahogany desk on one side. There are also various couches and chairs placed around the room. I find David sitting in a recliner having his feet up on an ottoman, and reading a newspaper. He lifts his head up when he sees me and a warm smile crosses his face.
“Good morning young lady. Did you rest well last night?”
I return his smile, “Yes, I slept very well. Better than I have in a long time. How about you? How are you doing?” I ask.
“Me? I’m still breathing. At my age and my condition, you need to be thankful just to have that.”
Before I have a chance to ask what he means, a serious look crosses his features, and I realize he is getting into business mode.
“Have a seat,” he says pointing to a chair near the recliner.
I sit down, waiting for him to start the conversation. He seems to ponder something before saying, “I found a job for you. It’s at my company… Well, I should say my old company. They like to remind me I’m not holding the helm anymore. Anyway, I found you a secretary position at the company. I assume you don’t have any experience in that area, correct?”
“Yes. I’ve never done anything like that, but,” I quickly add, “I’m a quick learner. I will pick it up quickly. I promise.”
“I know…I have a feeling you will. That’s why I’m offering you the position. You will have to work hard. I’ll ask them to make sure they give you ample training and take it easy on you the first couple of weeks, but Pierson Investments is a fast-paced place. You will need to catch up quickly.”
“I will. I promise.”
“Good. Because you will have to prove yourself. You will be one of the youngest employees and people will wonder why you were hired, and will probably underestimate you. It will be up to you to prove them wrong,” he says enthusiastically.
“Your salary will be over fifty percent more than a normal starting salary for this position, so make sure you don’t discuss it with anyone.”
“I don’t need to get paid more than what I am entitled to. I just want a fair chance. I don’t want to be a charity case. I really just want an opportunity.”
“I understand that and I admire it, but I am giving you a little more initially because you will need it to establish yourself. You will have to buy a car, save up for a deposit for an apartment, and cover your daily expenses. Doing all of that on an entry level secretary salary will be difficult. I want to give you a realistic chance of making it on your own without struggling too much. Even with that, you still will have to be smart with your money.”
I start to thank him, but he waves his hand to shush me.
“You start work on Monday morning. Nick will give you the information on where to go and who to ask for. Also, you can stay at one of our company apartments for a couple of months.”
Hearing him say that is such a big relief to me, it makes me want to scream for joy. Becoming homeless has been my biggest fear in the past few days, and I was worried that even with the prospects of a good paying job, I would still be in danger of homelessness, as I would have to work for a couple weeks before I get my first paycheck. Knowing I will have a roof over my head is a huge relief. I still don’t know what I will have to do for food, but at least I won’t be on the streets.
Just as I am thinking about how I could get some basic food for the next couple of weeks, David raises his head. “I’m also going to give you an advance from your first paycheck so you can cover your expenses until you get paid.”
His kindness and thoughtfulness make me speechless. I open my mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. I am so over-whelmed by emotions, my throat constricts and my eyes get moist. David seems to sense my emotional reaction, and he tries to make light of the situation.
“And until you buy a car, you can walk everywhere. I hear it’s good for your health,” he says with a smile. “The office is actually only a couple of blocks from the company apartments, so it should work out perfectly for you.”
“Mr. Pierson,” noticing the frown on his face, I quickly correct myself, “David. This... What you are giving me, means the world to me. I cannot find the words to thank you enough. You are literally saving my life. I hope I can repay you one day, but I don’t think I’ll ever be able to.”
“You can repay me by using the opportunity as a stepping stone and succeeding in life. Showing your family and the people who deserted you what a mistake they’ve made. Knowing I made a real difference in someone’s life is the biggest return for me. It’s one of the only things missing from my life.”
I nod my head in understanding. “I understand. Still, I feel eternally indebted to you, and I promise I will do my best to make you proud.”
A genuine smile crosses his lined face. “I believe you will. It’s time you take control of your life and let go of the pain of the past. It’s time to let hope blossom in the garden of your heart.”
I stand up to shake his hand and thank him again, before walking to the door.
After exiting David’s study, I walk slowly down the hallway trying to find my way out of the house. As I turn the corner, I spot Nick sitting at a desk working on a laptop. As soon as he seems me, he closes the laptop and gets up.
“Ready to go?”
“Yes.” I nod my head.
As we are walking towards the car, I wonder about Nick and his exact position with David. He is clearly David’s driver, but seems to do so much more than merely driving. I want to ask him, but fear the question may come across wrong, so I keep my mouth shut and get in the car.
“We’ll go back to the hotel to get your stuff and then I will drive you to the apartment. I can also show you the company offices on the way to the apartment, so you know where to go on Monday morning.”
“Thank you. That would be great!”
The drive to the apartment takes a little longer, as we battle the L.A. traffic, but we stay mostly quiet. After some time, I stop paying attention to where we are going and get lost in my own thoughts, until I notice we are in a parking garage, and Nick is parking the car.
I get out of the car as soon as we are parked. Nick grabs my bag from the trunk and leads the way to some elevators. We take the elevators to a lobby from which we take another elevator to the twenty-sixth floor. Nick walks me to a door down the hallway and hands me a key to open the door with. I walk inside the apartment that will be my home for the next two months, and I’m greeted by dark wood flooring and granite countertops. The place is not too large, but it is well furnished and is nicer than any apartment I have ever been to.