Release Me (The Music Within Book 2) (24 page)

Tonight’s
show was set up at the end of the arena, and his kit was locked down. Over the
years, he had contemplated emulating Tommy Lee of Motley Crue, but decided the
world would see him as a copycat if he built the elaborate spinning drum kit or
the roller coaster that allowed Tommy to fly high over the fans while playing.
Instead, he let his talent speak for itself. About halfway into the show, the
others took a break, and Cade let loose on his solo. This was his time to
shine, and shine he did. By the time he was finished with five pounding
minutes, he was drenched in sweat. His face was itching where the sweat was
gathering in his beard. He had kept his whiskers for Mal’s sake, but now he was
seriously considering shaving them off as soon as he got on the bus.

After
a fifteen minute encore, the lights came up, and the band was released for the
after party. With this being their hometown, the crowd waiting on them
backstage was one of the largest Cade had seen in a long time. He didn’t bother
to shower before meeting and greeting the fans. Hopefully, his sweat and musk
would keep most of the wannabe groupies away. After a couple of hours, Cade was
able to slip away unscathed to the bus with the others right behind him. As
soon as they were onboard, the bus pulled out of the parking lot and headed
down the highway.

Afton
had already congratulated each one of them on a job well done, so when Cade
didn’t see her on the bus after the show, he wasn’t surprised. He’d learned
from Roarke that their manager didn’t hang out with them like Echo had with 7’s
Mistress. He was okay with that. The less people on the bus, the more room he
and the guys had to spread out. Reed called dibs on the bed in the back of the
bus, and Cade called dibs on the shower.

Cade
ran his hand over his jaw as he stared at his reflection in the mirror. Was he
ready to let go of a piece of himself that Mal loved so much? It would be
months before he saw the cowboy again, and he could always grow it back. He
grabbed his razor out of his toiletry kit and lathered his face. Within a few
minutes, he was clean shaven and looked several years younger. As the whiskers
disappeared down the drain, a little of Cade’s heart went with it.

As
after every show, Cade was so jacked up he couldn’t sleep. Roarke and Logan
were playing a video game, and Reed was strumming an acoustic guitar in the
back of the bus. The lead singer was constantly writing songs and had a
notebook full of lyrics waiting for him to put music with. Cade needed
something to occupy his time, so he texted his uncle:
Any news on Dwight’s
parole hearing?

Cade
sent the message before realizing how late it was. If Gerard was on the East
Coast, he might be asleep. A few minutes later, he responded:
Yes, it’s set
for the 4
^th
of August

Shit!
That meant they had less than a month to find extra security.
Have you found
bodyguards for the farm?
Cade was not going to ask if Gerry had talked to
Mal.

Yes.
Spoke to Gus and Mack, and they have a couple of men

He
was
not
going to ask about Mal.
Have you talked to Mal?
Goddammit.
He couldn’t help himself.

After
a brief pause, his uncle replied:
Yes, there was a problem with one of the
tractors, and he wanted permission to get it fixed

He
knows he has free rein

He
does know, but he still doesn’t abuse it

Cade
had to ask:
How did he sound?

Frustrated.
Instead of calling me he called Conners

Steve
Conners was the consultant they had hired when Cade bought the farm. He didn’t
have authority over purchasing, but then again, nobody did, really. No one
except Cade and Gerard.

Cade
was confused, so he shot back
: If he called Conners how do you know he was
frustrated?

Steve
passed the call along to me, and I called Mal to tell him to get the tractor
fixed. How are things with you?

Good.
Just finished our gig in LA, headed down the coast. I guess for now you can
stop trying to sell my house

Hang
in there, Son

Cade
didn’t respond. He was hanging in there, but by a thread. The lack of
communication with Mal was driving him crazy. His last text made it clear the
ball was in Mal’s court, but damn if Cade didn’t need to talk to him. He said
goodnight to the band and made his way to his bunk. Propping his pillows behind
his head, he typed out a message:
I know I said the last message was the
last message, but I need to talk to you, even if it’s me writing a text you’ll
never read. We just finished our first show in LA. It was a packed house and
the energy was great. The after party was tame compared to most, but I did sign
autographs for a couple of hours. One girl requested I sign her tits, but I
told her no. I signed her shirt instead. Being back behind the skins in front
of all those people is just like I remember, but it doesn’t come close to being
with you. I miss you and I love you. Until tomorrow, Goodnight Cowboy

Mal
might not want to talk to Cade, and he probably wouldn’t even read the message,
but at least Cade would keep him up to date on what was going on in his life.
He was probably being foolish, but it made him feel a little closer, even if it
was one-sided. Cade rolled over on his side and let the hum of the bus lull him
to sleep.

Mal

The
last few weeks had been a nightmare. Literally. Between dreams of Dwight
getting out of prison and Cade taking the farm away from him, Mal was getting
no sleep. And those fucking texts weren’t helping. When he couldn’t scroll back
to the top and read each one as easily as he wanted, Mal figured out how to
send the messages to his email and print them off. If the guys knew he was
reading love letters from Cade instead of doing paperwork, they’d probably give
him shit. They already hounded him enough about ignoring Cade as it was. He was
becoming a surly ass, and he knew it, but he couldn’t seem to stop himself. So
instead of biting their heads off, he quit talking altogether, unless it was
about business.

At
least Andy and Bryan had each other. They had their military background to talk
about. At night, when their work was done, they would watch movies or play
poker. They tried to get Mal to join them, but when he lost a couple hundred
dollars playing poker because he was thinking of Cade, he stopped playing. Even
though he was doing well with his money, he had come up with a new plan. His
momma had permanently moved in with Walt, and Mal just needed to bide his time
until he could turn the farm over to someone else. There was no reason for him
to stay on as foreman now that he could afford to move on.

Well,
he couldn’t afford it just yet. His plan was to enroll in the welding program
at the local technical school. He would continue working the farm while going
to school, one class at a time. By the time he had his certificate, the farm
would be running smoothly, not that it wasn’t already, and he could move on.
Cade would still have a farm he could either turn over to someone else, or sell
to the highest bidder. The fact Mal was willing to let his family’s land go was
something he hadn’t yet discussed with his momma. He knew what her reaction
would be, but she had her new life, and it was time he had his. Without the
love of his life.

Dwight’s
parole was coming up the next week. Tyler had moved his family out of town to
live with his grandmother, so there had been no recent threats, but the
original message from his father was always at the back of his mind. The man
Mal now knew to be Cade’s uncle had called that morning asking Mal to return
his call. He wanted to discuss security at the farm. Mal almost laughed. It was
a goddamn farm, for fuck’s sake. But if his father got out of jail and
attempted to finish the job, not only was Mal in danger, but Andy and Bryan
were as well. He knew they carried pistols all the time. They didn’t try to
hide them. They also carried either a shotgun or rifle while they were out with
the cattle.

Neither
man had ever been on a horse before coming to work at the farm, but now they
were both excellent riders. They also took turns with Cade’s four wheeler. Mal
refused to ride it. He knew he was being a petulant child, but he didn’t want
anything to do with Cade’s money. Just living in the house that had been
remodeled with the drummer’s money was enough to make him sick. Bryan couldn’t
understand why it bothered Mal so much and said he wished he had someone who
loved him enough to want the best for him. Bryan had a shitty upbringing, too,
but he didn’t hold Cade at fault for coming from a wealthy family.

 Andy’s
grandparents were also loaded, but once they found out he was gay, they cut him
out of their lives. If his parents didn’t follow suit, they would also be cut
out of the will, so Andy knew the other side of what money could do. One night
when he was drinking, Andy told Mal if he was sure he didn’t want Cade, Andy
would love to have a boyfriend who was a kind and thoughtful, hot as fuck
drummer. Mal had to walk away before he punched his friend.

It
wasn’t that he didn’t want Cade – he did. He wanted him more than he wanted his
next breath. He just couldn’t trust him. Any kind of relationship would be
one-sided. Cade and his money would always win out over Mal and his… nothing.
No, it was better to let Cade go and for Mal to move on with his life.

Mal
was finished for the day, so after taking a shower, he went into his office and
pulled out his cell phone to call Gerard. He was surprised to find there wasn’t
his daily message from Cade, but then he remembered there was a big photo shoot
before the concert. He would love to see what Cade was wearing. See what his
rock star persona looked like. Did he wear leather, or did he prefer holey
jeans? Was he a t-shirt man, or did he go bare-chested? Mal had to stop
thinking about Cade without a shirt on. The mere thought of Cade did things to
his dick. The drummer could torment Mal without even being there.

He
dialed Gerard’s number and waited for him to pick up.

“Hello,
Malcolm. Thank you for returning my call.”

“Sure.
What did you want to talk to me about?”

“With
the possibility of your father being paroled next week, we have hired a couple
of men to stand guard over you and your mother. They have been thoroughly
vetted, and I can assure you, they are the best at what they do.”

“I
don’t think Walt’s gonna like the fact someone else is watchin’ over my momma.”

“I
have spoken with Mr. Johnson, and he appreciates the assistance with Suzette.”

“You’re
kiddin’.”

“No,
Mal. Walt is a man who recognizes the threat for what it is. Even though he was
a military man in his day, Mr. Johnson is older. Granted, your father is older
as well, but we have no idea if he will carry out the threat alone or with
help, if he follows through with it at all.”

“Yeah,
okay. Whatever. It’s not my property, so whatever you do is fine with me.”

“Thank
you for your cooperation. We are doing this because we care, Mal. Cole and
Toby, the two security guards, will be there tomorrow morning. I am texting you
their photographs so you will know it is them when they arrive.”

We
are doing this because we care. We.
Why did Cade’s uncle give a shit what happened to Mal? “Okay, thank you. I
really do appreciate it.”

“Don’t
hesitate to call if you need anything. And Mal? Please respond to Cade. His
heart’s breaking a little more each day.” Gerard disconnected before Mal could
say anything. He leaned his head back against the chair and closed his eyes. He
didn’t want to break Cade’s heart. Mal wasn’t worth a broken heart. He opened
the top right drawer where he kept all the notes from Cade and found the
original. He scanned through the words until he found what he was looking for…

I
promise to be faithful until the day we meet face to face, and you can look me
in the eye and tell me it’s over.

That
was it. Mal needed to find Cade and go see him. Once he told him it was over in
person, they both could move on, and he knew just how to find him. Mal headed
to the kitchen where Andy and Bryan were tag-teaming supper. Andy had taken
mercy on them all and started teaching Bryan how to cook. He told his friend
there was no way he’d ever find a wife if he couldn’t help out around the
house. They all took turns cleaning and doing laundry. Andy did extra duty in
the cleaning department since he had convinced Mal to put in a doggy door so
the boys could come in at night. They were used to sleeping in the barn, but
Andy had never had dogs growing up, and he was super attached to Moe and Curly.
Mal relented, as long as Andy agreed to clean up after them and only feed them
dog food.

One
night, Mal caught Andy trying to get Moe up on the couch, but the dog took one
look at Mal and parked his ass on the floor at Andy’s feet. Andy apologized,
even though he didn’t sound sincere. Mal actually enjoyed having the dogs in
the house. When he realized they weren’t losing their manners or training by
being allowed inside, he let them in his room if they followed him upstairs.
And honestly, he appreciated the company.

“What’s
for supper?” he asked.

“Chicken
pot pie,” Bryan answered. That explained the dough being rolled out on the
floured counter.

“Say,
do you know when Cade’s band is comin’ through Nashville?” he tossed out
nonchalantly.

Bryan
halted the rolling pin and turned toward Mal. “Yeah, you wanna go with?”

“You’re
goin’?” Mal should have figured he would be. Bryan loved hard rock music.

“Yeah,
Cade’s getting me a backstage pass. I’m sure he’d get you one, too.”

That
would be perfect. He could wait for Cade after the show, and they could end
things once and for all. “I’d appreciate it if you’d talk to him about it.”

“Why
don’t you ask him yourself, boss? I know he’d rather talk to you than me.”

A
tinge of jealousy welled up in Mal’s chest at the thought of the handsome man
talking to Cade, even though he knew Bryan was straight. “You talk to Cade a
lot?”

“Not
a lot,” he admitted. Andy picked up the rolling pin and turned his back on Mal.
That was a sign of a guilty conscious if Mal had ever seen one.

“And
what about you, Andy? You talk to Cade, too?”

“Not
a lot,” he echoed Bryan without looking Mal’s way. Mal wasn’t sure if he wanted
to know what
not a lot
was or not. He already had bad dreams about Cade
and Andy hooking up. Andy was a good-looking man, after all. A good-looking man
who was obviously very perceptive, because he stopped working with the dough
and told Mal, “Boss, Cade isn’t my type.”

“Oh,
really? And what is your type?” Mal asked, unable to keep the disbelief out of
his voice. They had never discussed Andy’s taste in men or Bryan’s taste in
women, but Andy had certainly ogled Cade when he was shirtless.

“I
like twinks,” he admitted and shrugged.

“What
the fuck’s a Twinkie?” Mal grumbled. He knew there were all types of names for
gay men, but he wasn’t familiar with the terminology.

“Even
I know this one,” Bryan cut in. “It’s a man who looks young, almost like a boy
still.”

“Why
would you want a boy when you can have a big man to toss you around and
manhandle you?” Both Andy and Bryan cocked their eyebrows, grinning.

“Oh,
shut up. Seriously, why would you want a boy?” Mal thought back to when he and
Tyler were fooling around. They were in their teens and neither one had filled
out much, but with Mal working the farm, he was quite a bit more muscular than
Tyler. He remembered the soft skin that stretched over his friend’s stomach, no
definition of abs in sight. His chest was practically flat, and he had no chest
hair, even when he hit puberty. Mal had loved Tyler, but even then he wished he
was
harder
all over.

“I
don’t want a boy per se, but I like my men a little less hairy and masculine
looking. I also like to be in control. I like to do the manhandling, if you get
my drift.”

Mal
did. He and Cade often fought for dominance, but in the end, it hadn’t mattered
who was on top or bottom. Shaking
that
image from his head, he felt a
little better about Andy not wanting Cade. But his thinking wasn’t fair or
rational. Here he was, plotting to get in front of Cade so he could officially
break things off, and he was mad for even thinking about Cade and someone else.
This was going to be hard, but he had to do it.

“We’ve
got two new guys startin’ tomorrow. They’re gonna be watchin’ over the place
since my fuckhead father is up for parole next week.”

“Good,”
Bryan said as he shredded the cooked chicken breasts into small pieces to add
to the pies. “Andy and I do our best to watch things, but a thousand acres is a
lot of land to cover. If Dwight decides to come after you, it’s gonna take more
than the two of us to watch your six.”

Mal
should have known Cade would have the two former Marines on guard duty. From
prior conversations sitting around the fire, Mal learned a little about both
their lives in the service and before. It was the before neither of them wanted
to talk about. Even though both had seen some horrific shit while deployed, it
didn’t bother either one of them to discuss it. Mal had finally told them about
Curtis and how he had been declared MIA. He almost felt guilty listening to
their stories of how they had willingly joined the military to serve and
protect. Mal hadn’t even been able to protect his momma.

Mal
pulled out his phone and showed them Cole and Toby’s pictures. Andy let out a
wolf whistle. “Holy shit, they’re hot.”