Authors: Monique Miller
Redemption Lake (14 page)
“I promise, Charlotte. No secrets, no messing around, no more drama.”
“I hear you, Xavier,” Charlotte repeated, still seeming unconvinced.
She looked down at her watch, then wiped her eyes again. “I guess we'd better get back inside. They've probably already started the next session.”
Xavier looked at his own watch. They were late for the beginning of the afternoon session. Even though his legs felt stiff and heavy as he stood, his heart was light.
Chapter 15
Xavier Knight
Tuesday: 1:14
P.M
.
Tuesday: 1:14
P.M
.
Charlotte and Xavier reentered the cabin and tried not to disturb the other couples who were already in the midst of conversation. They took their respective seats at The Round Table.
Noticing a few of the eyes glancing at him and Charlotte, Xavier said, “Sorry, we had to discuss a few things.”
“It's all right,” Phillip said. “We were just going back over the S.M.I.R.K. acronym. Feel free to join in.”
Xavier appreciated the fact that Phillip had smoothly welcomed them back to the group without a be-on-time-next-time undertone. Even though Phillip hadn't been out on the porch with them, it was as if somehow he knew they were trying to focus on getting their marriage back together.
“George was giving us his take on how the differences in religion that a husband and wife might have, can impact marriages,” Phillip said.
“You wouldn't believe how many people I have coming to me with arguments about their religious beliefs,” George said. “Many of them got married with the understanding that each would continue to participate in their respective religions or dominations.” George shook his head. “It's often such a mess. One person goes to church and the other doesn't, or the husband worships at one church and the wife is at another church with no spiritual unity at all. Then they wonder why many of the other areas of their lives were so askew. They didn't understand that God wanted them to be unified, coming together with an agreement that would entail oneness.”
“How'd you get the couples to come in for counseling, especially if one of them wasn't a member of your church?” Phillip asked.
“Only about a quarter of who I counsel are actually my members, believe it or not. Many people enjoy watching my broadcasts. And the couples know I am real and tell it like it is. They may not like what I have to say, though, by the time they leave my office. But they do respect the advice I've given them,” George said.
Travis nodded his head. “So George, how do you find the time to counsel people with all the services you have and the traveling I see you doing?”
“I make the time. People say I am a soldier for the Lord. I am also a soldier for married couples. My book,
I Do, I Don't,
has a workbook that accompanies it. Whenever I counsel couples, I encourage them to read the book and work on the exercises in the workbook. If a couple does this and is serious about making their marriage stronger or repairing damage, I continue to counsel them as needed. But if I see people are playing games with their time and mine, I'll quickly let them know to take it elsewhere.”
I Do, I Don't,
has a workbook that accompanies it. Whenever I counsel couples, I encourage them to read the book and work on the exercises in the workbook. If a couple does this and is serious about making their marriage stronger or repairing damage, I continue to counsel them as needed. But if I see people are playing games with their time and mine, I'll quickly let them know to take it elsewhere.”
Xavier felt George came off as not only a spiritual man of God, but also a knowledgeable one. The man had sold millions of books and often appeared on talk shows talking about his ministry. And he definitely acted as if he were a no-nonsense kind of guy. So Xavier wondered why a man who was sought out by so many for his spiritual guidance was sitting at the same table with him, getting advice from a man no one really knewâas far as the religious world was concerned.
George shook his head. “Sadly disagreements about religious beliefs have contributed to the demise of many a marriage.”
Charlotte stood, excusing herself. Xavier touched her arm, wondering if she were okay. She smiled, reassuring him she was fine; mouthing she needed to use the bathroom.
Xavier beamed inwardly, glad to finally see a smile on his wife's face for the first time since she found out about the STD. Things were looking up for him.
“What about the little things? You know ... the intangible things as Phillip called them?” Beryl asked. She'd directed her question to George.
“Ah, the intangibles. The things we don't often know about until after we've said I do,” George replied.
“Yeah. How often do you find couples who can't overcome the intangibles? Little things do mean a lot, and after they pile up, they're sort of hard to overlook,” Beryl said.
“Compared to the problems of sex, money, religion, and kids, the intangibles are things that don't always seem as big. But if enough intangible things pile up, and especially if it is coupled with one or more of the other big four, the little things can cause unbelievable marital strife,” George said.
Xavier was glad he and Charlotte didn't have any money problems. Early on, they'd decided who would take care of which bills. They also decided that Charlotte would handle the budget; not because Xavier was bad with money, but because she happened to be better than he was with it.
They'd also never had any problems with religion; not in his eyes anyway. Charlotte was a saved Christian woman when he met her. And although he wasn't saved, his mother and grandmother had been, and he'd been raised in a loving Christian home. He went to church on Sundays and paid his tithe along with his wife. He didn't see a real need to become saved like the people he'd seen going to the altar at the end of each service. Because except for his proclivity toward women, he knew deep down he was a good guy. And now that he had been given a second chance, obviously from God, to save his marriage, he swore to himself that he would never stray again. He'd do whatever it took. He'd already ruined his first wife's life and would make sure he didn't ruin Charlotte's with any more of his shenanigans. It was only by the grace of God he hadn't contracted AIDS, and from Charlotte's test results, she didn't have the disease either.
The subject of kids was a different story. He knew Charlotte wanted kids and hoped one day she'd at least consider being open to going to have some tests done to see if there might be any problems. Until then, he'd be patient and be ready to discuss the subject whenever she might be ready to talk.
Xavier could only think of two things that still irked him after all the time they'd been married. The first thing was that whenever Charlotte washed dishes, she always faced the dishes in the wrong direction in the dish drainer. His mother and grandmother always faced the front of the plates away. The other thing she did was to put the toilet paper on the roll backward, so that the tissue hung down in the back instead of the front when pulling it down. He always had to pull from the back, and it was awkward to him. So without saying anything, he'd change the roll whenever he saw it had been turned the wrong way.
These two things irked him, but weren't anything he'd have to go see a counselor about. The dishes always dried whichever way they were turned, and the toilet paper still did its job when needed.
As far as Xavier was concerned, he and Charlotte were in pretty good shape. Especially now that she was warming back up to him and giving him another chance. He was looking forward to their free time that evening. He couldn't wait for their one-on-one time, without the interruption of others. The marriage retreat was turning out to be the best thing they could have done for their marriage.
Charlotte returned from the bathroom with a thick, brown, expanding accordion file in her hand. He hadn't seen this folder before and hadn't noticed it packed among the things in her suitcase. Xavier looked at her questioningly, wondering what it could be.
She smiled as she sat next to him, but her smile wasn't that of love and hopeful reconciliation. It was a smile that more closely resembled the smirk Phillip had displayed earlier that morning. The smirk gave him an uneasiness in his stomach.
Charlotte placed the folder on the opposite side of her on the floor, well away from him. “What did I miss?” she said. Her voiceâunlike her smirkâwas delightful and pleasant. Her demeanor continually caused Xavier's stomach to feel uneasy.
Phillip filled her in. “George was just telling us how sometimes the intangible things in a marriage can compound any other problems that may be present. The little things can often mean a lot; especially when there are quite a few little things to factor in.
“We've reviewed the intangible problems and problems with religion. What would you all like to discuss next?” Phillip asked.
“How about the subject of sex and lies?” Charlotte asked.
Xavier didn't know exactly where Charlotte was going with what she was saying, but he had a sinking feeling that it couldn't be going anywhere good.
“Sex and lies?” Phillip asked.
“Yeah. I mean you've discussed the fact that couples need to let the other spouse know where they stand when it comes to sex. But what if you've done that, but a spouse doesn't adhere to what you've established verbally and doesn't adhere to what should be understood in a marriage?” Charlotte asked.
“That's a very good point,” Phillip said. “When talking about the areas of S.M.I.R.K, I did so with the understanding that each spouse needs to be open and honest in each of these areas. When you add lies into the equation, they lead to dishonesty. If there is dishonesty, you will not be able to effectively work out problems you may be having.”
Phillip looked around at each person in the room with utmost sincerity. “You've got to be open and honest with your spouses. If not, then you're wasting your time at this retreat and taking up space where another couple could have been sitting.”
Xavier clearly heard what Phillip was saying, and he had kept the whole truth from his wife. But he wasn't about to start divulging extra information about the other escapades outside of his marriage, especially when Charlotte didn't know anything about them. He'd had friends who hadn't been loyal to their wives. Often times, the wives did find out about some of their extra curricular activities, but none of the guys had been dumb enough to let the women know everything. What the women didn't know wouldn't hurt them. And for the most part, the guys cut back on what they were doing or completely stopped, realizing the grass wasn't always greener on the other side.
Charlotte didn't have to know about his other activities. Knowing about Yasmine was enough. The Yasmine subject alone had almost brought their marriage to an end. Xavier shuttered to think what she would do if she found out about any one else, especially their neighbor, Carly, a supposable good friend of Charlotte's, who smiled in her face whenever she got the chance; especially when they had book club meetings.
“Okay, so on the subject of sex, what if you've talked to your spouse about being honest and they tell you wholeheartedly they're being open?” Charlotte asked.
“Then it's at that point you have to trust in the person you've married. You have to take them at their word,” Phillip said.
“But what if you can't do that? What if you know they're not telling you the truth?” Charlotte asked.
“Well, that depends on what you mean by knowing the other person isn't telling the truth. Let's just say it's a wife for instance?” Phillip said.
Charlotte nodded her head in agreement.
“And let's just say she doesn't trust something her husband is saying because she has that strong women's intuition you ladies often have. Or maybe even a friend who might be voicing their own personal concerns to the wife,” Phillip said and smiled.
Charlotte sat unsmiling at Phillip's statements about intuition and friends.
Xavier, as well as the others sitting around the table, watched the conversation between Phillip and Charlotte like it was a tennis match.
“Then again, you still need to trust what the other spouse is saying. Later on this week we'll be talking about communication barriers.” Phillip chuckled. “Believe me when I say the brain often distorts stuff.”
“What if it's not intuition?” Charlotte asked. “What if you just know without a shadow of doubt that this person is not being honest with you? You know they're downright lying, or shall I say withholding information?”
“Again, that just depends on what you might have. Or shall I say the hypothetical person might have. I would encourage that person to talk with their spouse again and call them on it. Maybe that person is scared and just needs some encouragement. Especially when it comes to us guys. Sometimes we get scared when we think there might be something you women will hold against us or just go completely off on us.”
Without even knowing it, Xavier nodded his head in agreement, ever so slightly.
“So you think the hypothetical woman should talk to the hypothetical man again and show him that she knows he's lying?” Charlotte asked.
“Or withholding,” Phillip said. He smiled encouragingly at Charlotte and Xavier.
Charlotte nodded her head in understanding.
Xavier knew everyone in the room knew who the hypothetical wife and husband were. But surely Charlotte hadn't found anything concrete for which she could hold him accountable. He'd seen the test results for the STD. That was concrete, but they'd already discussed it at length. She'd tried time after time to get him to tell her the exact details of the affair, but he held firm in keeping everything else to himself.
Xavier had also held fast, saying the affair was completely over. He didn't have, and had never had, any real feelings for the other woman. And he adamantly tried reassuring Charlotte that she didn't have to ever worry about him sleeping with another woman again.
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