Reconsidering Riley (39 page)

K.C.'s eyebrows rose. "What if she's not
waiting for you?"

"Not waiting for...of
course
she'll
be waiting for me!"

But...what if she
wasn't
waiting
for him
? Dread nailed him to the spot. Typically, when faced
with a problem, Riley took action first and deliberated later. He
acted on instinct. In the wilderness, slow contemplation got a
person in trouble—sometimes lethal trouble. It didn't pay to be Mr.
Thoughtful when confronting a rock slide or battling rapids. His
whole life had bowed to that philosophy.

He frowned. "You think she'll wait for me,
don't you?"

"Dunno. Do you want to take that
chance?"

Hmmm. Making amends later, after Jayne was
calmed down and had gained some perspective—versus crawling back to
her now, while she was still mad. Keeping his
National
Explorer
commitment—versus potentially losing this and future
assignments. It shouldn't have been a difficult choice.

But it was.

Filled with good intentions but uncertain
how best to realize them, Riley wavered. He glanced at the boarding
gate, at K.C. waiting for his decision. He looked at Jayne's book,
and her photo on the back.
Damn
. What was he going to
do?

Chapter Twenty-Four

Everything was quiet when Jayne reached the
canyon lodge with Alexis in tow. Birds twittered in the trees, a
gentle breeze blew, and sunshine sparkled from the two Hideaway
Lodge vans parked in front of the log-cabin-style structure.

The return-trip vans
, Jayne realized.
Here to take everyone back to civilization
. The adventure
travel trip she hadn't wanted—but which had given her so much—had
already come to an end.

Feeling unexpectedly melancholy at the
realization, she stopped for a moment. This might be her last trip
here to Arizona. The last trip she'd be able to afford for a very
long time, if things went badly in the next few minutes. She was
risking a lot to come here this way.

But she was risking it all for Riley.

With a defiant lift of her shoulders, Jayne
began walking again. She caught up to Alexis just as the girl
ascended the lodge porch and reached for the door. No sounds came
from inside, no laughter or conversation. Jayne imagined all her
breakup-ees, all the guides,
everyone
, simultaneously
frowning with their arms crossed as they waited to hear her
explanation for having disappeared this morning. She quavered.

The screen door creaked open. "It'll be
okay," Alexis whispered. "Whatever you have planned, it can't be
that
drastic."

Oh, but it was. Jayne knew it, just as she
knew there'd be no avoiding it. Not now that she'd made her
decision. Nervously, she swept her hair from her eyes, then licked
her lips in lieu of lip gloss.

"I'm ready," she said, and stepped
inside.

Within, the common room held the sort of
energy that told Jayne everyone had been watching her approach from
the window—and had scurried for their seats when she'd ascended the
steps. Curtains fluttered, rugs were ruffled from the passage of
hasty feet, and chairs teetered with the impact of having been all
but dove into. Now, though, everyone sat quietly, being studiously
nonchalant as Jayne entered the room.

Doris and Donna glanced up from a crossword
puzzle, seeming surprisingly at peace with each other. Bruce and
Lance frowned at the checkers board between them, while Mack stood
nearby pretending to study the game. Carla read a book—upside
down—while Mitzi brushed her hair. Only Kelly happened to look at
Jayne directly, and that was because she was very
obviously
interested in the time displayed on the wall clock behind Jayne's
head.

The time
. She didn't have much of
that to lose. According to the information Alexis had given her,
Riley's flight had left over two hours ago.

"Hi, everyone," Jayne said, waving
awkwardly.

Two men she didn't recognize—but whom she
assumed were the return-trip van drivers—peeked around the kitchen
corner, then disappeared. They'd obviously been drawn by the
tension in the air. And scared off by it, too. Too bad. Their help
could be important to her later.

"Hi?" she repeated.

"Oh, hi!" One by one, her breakup-ees and
guides looked up from their individual activities. Each person
feigned surprise.

She guessed they did it to spare her
feelings, and was touched by their concern. Jayne hoped they
wouldn't be sorry for it, once they learned the truth about her.
The last thing she wanted was to be a disappointment to even more
of the people in her life. It looked as though there might be no
help for it, though. She might as well forge on ahead, and get this
over with.

"I...have something to tell you," she said,
dropping her backpack to the floor. Nervousness assailed her, and
Jayne fisted her hands tightly. "It's not going to be easy, but I
hope you'll all keep open minds."

In his creaky suburban, Riley bounced over
the unimproved Northern Arizona dirt roads, hands fisted on the
steering wheel. He'd left the Sedona airport a short while ago,
encouraged by shouted well-wishes from K.C. and the gang. After a
short stop in town, he'd motored on toward the canyon lodge with
only one thought in mind.

Jayne
.

He hoped he wasn't too late. She hadn't been
there this morning when he'd found Bruce and Mack to tell them he
was leaving, and he had no idea where she'd gone—only that she'd,
miraculously, decided to hike there. By now, Jayne might be miles
down the trail.

Well, if she was, he'd just have to follow
her, Riley decided. At a run. With that thought in mind, he patted
the container housing the surprise he'd brought for her, and drove
a little faster. It would be tough to bring his surprise on the
trail, but he'd do it if that's what it took.

Fifteen minutes later, Riley parked his
suburban in a cloud of dust outside the canyon lodge. He eyeballed
the waiting vans with an acute sense of relief. At least the whole
crew hadn't already left. That meant—maybe—that Jayne was still
here, too.

He hefted his surprise and carried it toward
the lodge. All around him, it seemed mysteriously quiet. No music
from Alexis and Lance's radio wafted past on the breeze. No
giggling came from Mitzi and Bruce. No laughter from Carla and
Kelly. No bickering from Doris and Donna.

Something was definitely wrong
. Had
Jayne gotten hurt on the trail? Were they all huddled worriedly
around her, waiting for an airlift helicopter to arrive? He never
should have let her go on her own, no matter how proficient she'd
become at wilderness skills. Worried now about more than reaching
her in time, Riley quickened his pace.

As he ascended the porch steps, awkwardly
juggling his surprise, Jayne's voice came from inside the lodge's
common room. To his relief, she sounded fine. Better than fine.
Remarkable. Her voice drifted strong and firm through the screen
door that opened onto the common room, and she was saying something
about...her book?

Frowning, Riley paused with his hand on the
screen door's metal handle. He listened, not wanting to barge in if
she was conducting important anti-heartbreak book business. If
there was one thing he was sure about, it was that Jayne's work was
important to her. Maybe
the
most important thing to her.

"I know you all came here to learn how to
cure your broken hearts," he heard her say. "I wanted nothing more
than to teach you. Heck, my whole hands-on workshop-in-a-book
concept was designed so people like you could learn what to do! And
I'm
so
grateful to you all for coming here. For listening to
me. For giving me your ideas. They were all wonderful. I can't tell
you what a fabulous second book they would have made."

Would have made?
Riley thought. What
was she talking about?

He heard Jayne clear her throat, as though
she was getting choked up about something. Curious, he edged
sideways on the porch, silently, until she came into view through
the screen. Her shoulders were straight, her hands clasped, her
head momentarily bowed. All the guidance groupies, all the travel
guides, Lance and Alexis...everyone sat with their gazes fixed on
her as she stood, hesitating, in the center of the room.

"I say 'would have made,'" Jayne continued,
"because there won't be a second book. There won't be a
Heartbreak 202: Hands-On Help
. I'm so sorry to disappoint
all of you, but I was the wrong person to write that book. I was
the wrong person to write
Heartbreak 101
! When I tell you
what I'm going to do, you'll understand why."

There were murmurs of surprise, sounds of
people shifting in their chairs. Needing to fidget off some of the
tension inside him himself, Riley instead stood still to hear more
clearly. He shifted the surprise in his arms, then tilted his head
and waited. Jayne's success as a self-help guru meant everything to
her. What could possibly have convinced her she needed to sacrifice
it?

"It turns out," Jayne said clearly, "that
I've violated the most basic tenant of
Heartbreak 101
. I've
fallen in love with one of my exes. Again."

Fallen in love?
Riley clenched his
surprise harder, stunned by this news.
With who?
Bozo Boy?
Someone else?

Then he realized
he
was Bozo Boy,
according to the revelation she'd given him this morning. It was
possible Jayne meant him, meant that she'd fallen in love with
him
. A rush of hope filled him as Riley went on listening.
He didn't
want
to be Bozo Boy. But if he had to be, he
wanted to be the Bozo Boy she loved.

"No, not really 'again,'" Jayne was saying.
"The truth is, I've loved Riley Davis since the day he saw me get
soaked by a runaway wave, and did everything he could short of
barricading the ladies' room to get me dry. I've loved him since he
left me, and all the time he was gone. I've even loved him since we
got thrown together on this crazy trip."

Riley blinked, an unbelievable happiness
soaring through him.
Jayne loved him
. She really loved him.
In spite of everything, she loved him.

Damn, he was a lucky man
.

"I know this makes me a fraud," Jayne went
on, her voice quavering. "I'm sorry. But Riley means more to me
than any book, any job, ever could. I love him and I don't think
I'll ever stop. So even though it means leaving you all in the
lurch, I'm going after him. I have to."

In the silence that followed, she grabbed
her pack from the floor. Riley saw Alexis give Jayne a
two-thumbs-up sign, and they exchanged teary-eyed smiles. The rest
of the group only sat there, probably too astonished to speak, as
Jayne headed for the door.

"I'm going to Antigua," she announced as she
did, "providing the van drivers will take me to the airport so I
can catch a flight. Otherwise, I'll walk! I have ATSes. I can do
it! And when I get to Antigua, I'm going to track down Riley. And
if he'll have me—"

"Hell, yes," Riley said loudly, opening the
door at last. He stepped into the common room, bowled over by the
beautiful, longed-for sight of Jayne in his path. "
He'll have
you
."

Okay, she was going to pass out, Jayne
realized. She was going to keel over, right there in the lodge's
common room in front of everyone, and spoil this movie-perfect
moment.

"Riley?" she asked, gaping at him. "What are
you—how did you—how much of what I said did you—"

"
Enough
," he said, and came to
her.

He looked big and strong and beloved. Also
worn and battered and broad. His dark hair was mussed. His clothes
looked slept in. But when she gazed into his eyes, Jayne saw love
there, and that was all she needed.

"
I'll
have you," Riley went on.
"Thank God you still want me. I'm so, so sorry for everything. For
hassling you about your book—which is excellent, by the way. I just
read it. And for not helping you more on this trip, when I know it
was hard for you. And for botching my explanation this morning. I
just froze, Jayne. It happens. It doesn't mean I don't need you to
forgive me. And, most of all—" He set down the thing in his hands,
which looked like a plastic-and-wire carrier of some sort. "—I'm
sorry for leaving you. I was an idiot. Please, please forgive
me."

Stunned, Jayne gawked at him. Vaguely, she
became aware of all her breakup-ees, all the travel guides, even
Alexis and Lance, turning their heads back and forth like
spectators at a tennis match, following her conversation with
Riley. Now, they all turned expectant faces toward her.

"I'm sorry, too," she said. "For everything.
Oh, Riley, I would go anywhere with you. I would survive nature
breaks and fish whacking and tent building. I would go places with
you that didn't even have a
Nordstrom's
. That's how much I
want to be with you."

He grinned. "Is that an 'I forgive
you?'"

"Yes," Jayne said, smiling back. "If you
forgive me." Then something else occurred to her. "But aren't you
supposed to be in Antigua?" she asked. "You were supposed to have
left already. I was supposed to run after you and make a dramatic
appearance. It was my
plan
. My insanely romantic plan."

He smiled. "I couldn't leave without you. I
couldn't leave without setting this right."

"Well, I have to say, I feel a little
gypped," Jayne told him lightly, still grappling with what all this
meant. "My big dramatic gesture was going to be really spectacular
for you, and—hey, what about your National Explorer
assignment?"