Reckless Desire (3 page)

“Show me,” I whispered. My hand stroked his chest and flat belly, then slid down to his hard, muscular thigh.

Shadow groaned low in his throat as he grabbed me and gave me a fierce hug, crushing my breasts against his chest. His mouth possessed mine as his hands stroked my back, then slid around to caress my breasts.

“Hannah, I think you have bewitched me,” he murmured, his voice close to my ear. “I can never get enough of you.”

Ah, sweet words to hear. I closed my eyes, surrendering myself completely to the man who was my husband, thrilling to his touch, to the sound of his voice, low and husky with desire, as he whispered, “
Nemehotatse
, Hannah.
Nemehotatse
, forever.”

“
Nemehotatse
,” I replied, barely able to speak as our bodies became one. “I love you, too, forever.”

Chapter Three

The first rays of dawn were lighting the eastern sky when Hawk left the house and walked a short distance to the narrow stream that watered their property. Standing near the water’s edge, he raised his arms toward the vast blue-gray sky and began to pray, pleading with Maheo to protect his family from harm, to bless his sons with health and strength, to smile on Victoria, who was pregnant again.

Some twenty minutes later, he finished his prayer. Stepping out of his buckskins, he walked into the stream to bathe. His solitary prayer and bath afterward were a daily ritual that he never missed, no matter what the weather.

Floating on his back, he thought of Victoria. He had not meant to get her pregnant again so soon. The twins kept her busy from dawn until dark, and though she rarely complained, he wondered if she were truly pleased to be having another child so soon. It was all his fault. He had vowed not to touch her until the twins were weaned, as was the custom among the Cheyenne. But he loved her so much. It was impossible to be with her every day, to see her and kiss her and hear her sweet voice, and not make love to her. Her body had changed since the birth of the twins. It was rounder, fuller, more feminine. He had not been able to keep his hands off her, and now she was pregnant again.

Emerging from the water, he slipped into his clothes and padded barefoot to the barn where he fed and watered the stock. Returning to the house, he saw that Victoria was in the kitchen preparing his breakfast. The twins were sitting on a blanket on the floor, playing with some brightly colored blocks that Leland Smythe had carved for them.

Victoria smiled as Hawk came up behind her and slipped his arms around her waist. “Good morning,” she said cheerfully, and giggled as his tongue tickled her neck.

“Good morning,” Hawk replied. He gave her a squeeze, then stooped to cuddle one child and then the other.
My sons
, he thought proudly. They had the look of the People in the color of their hair and skin, and Hawk was glad. He was proud to be Cheyenne, proud of his Indian heritage.

They shared a pleasant breakfast, then Hawk went outside to check on the five horses that were corralled in a small box canyon not far from the house. They were all mares ready to foal, and as he slipped through the fence, he saw that two of the mares had given birth the night before.

The horses whickered softly as he walked among them. They had all been broken to saddle and were accustomed to his presence. Approaching the mares that had foaled, he checked the afterbirth to make sure it had all been expelled, then checked the foals, a filly and a colt. Both were reddish-brown with spotted rumps. His own stallion had sired both foals.

After making certain the mares and foals were in good condition, he checked the pasture to make certain there was enough grass, and then left the canyon to check on the four yearlings corralled behind the barn.

With the stock taken care of, he threw a bridle on his stallion, fetched his rifle from the house, gave Victoria a lingering kiss, and then rode into the woods in search of a deer.

Bear Valley had grown considerably in the last few years, he mused, but the woods remained virtually unchanged. Tall trees reached toward the sky, their branches so thick in some places that they blocked out the sun. It was quiet within the forest, dark and primeval. A chipmunk skittered across his path, a gray squirrel scolded him from the safety of a tree limb, a blue jay shrilled raucously as it flew past his head.

Lost in thought, Hawk rode deeper into the forest until, without realizing it, he was at Rabbit’s Head Rock. Reining his horse to a halt, he gazed out at the vast sea of yellow grass that stretched as far as the eye could see. Once the Sioux and the Cheyenne and the Arapahoe had roamed the endless prairie. Once the buffalo had darkened the earth like a curly brown blanket. But now all was quiet. The Indians languished on the reservation; the buffalo were nearly extinct.

He glanced at the huge gray rock. His mother and father had met near Rabbit’s Head Rock almost thirty years ago. Even now, they sometimes came to this place to be alone.

Hawk grinned, remembering the time he and Victoria had sat against the rock, hugging and kissing, until Mercy Tillman showed up. Mercy had been a wild girl, rumored to have slept with most of the men in the valley. When she got pregnant, she had accused Hawk of being the father, certain everyone would believe he was guilty because he was a half-breed. There had been a confrontation at the Tillman shack, with Shadow and Hawk insisting that Hawk was innocent and Mercy Tillman’s father Morgus arguing that Hawk was guilty as hell, and that Shadow had probably been sweet on Mercy as well. A fight had erupted between Shadow and Morgus, and when it looked as if Shadow might lose, Hawk had reached for Tillman’s rifle, but Mercy got it first. They had struggled over the gun, and then it had gone off. The bullet hit Morgus, killing him instantly. To this day, Hawk didn’t know who had pulled the trigger, nor did he care. He would gladly have killed Morgus and a dozen like him to save his father’s life. Mercy had left Bear Valley shortly thereafter. He wondered, without really caring, what had happened to her.

With a sigh, he reined his stud around and headed for home, his eyes searching the underbrush for game. He was nearly out of the woods when he saw a big buck. Lifting his rifle, he took careful aim and fired. The slug found its target and the deer dropped to the ground.

With ease Hawk placed the buck over the stallion’s withers, vaulted onto the horse’s back, and headed home, eager to see Victoria and his sons.

* * * *

Victoria sighed wearily as she put her sons down for a nap. No matter how hard she worked, there was always more to do. Dishes, diapers, baking, mending, ironing, preparing meals, they all took such a lot of time and effort, and it seemed she never caught up. And now there was another baby on the way. She was glad to be having Hawk’s child, proud to be his wife, but she wished she could put this child off another year or two. How would she manage three small children, a husband, and a house?

Picking up her mending basket, she sat down in a chair near the window and began to mend one of Hawk’s shirts. Just once, she’d like to have nothing to do. Just once.

Resting her head against the back of the chair, she closed her eyes. She wished her mother lived nearby. It would be so nice to be able to go to her mother for help. But her parents had left Bear Valley when they discovered she was pregnant with Hawk’s child. Pregnant and not married. Pregnant by a half-breed. They had left the valley and never returned. Never even sent word as to their whereabouts, or wrote to ask if she was well. She knew she could go to Hawk’s mother for help, but she was too proud to ask, too proud to admit that raising two sons and keeping a house was almost more than she could handle.

For a brief moment, she thought wistfully of the life she had shared with her parents. Their house been the biggest and nicest in all Bear Valley, she’d had a room of her own decorated in pastel pink and pale green, lovely clothes with matching hats and shoes, delicate underwear. Anything she had ever asked for had been hers simply for the asking.
A fur fluff, Daddy, please
, and he had bought it for her. A pretty china doll. A silk parasol. Blue satin dancing slippers. Colorful ribbons for her hair. She had been pampered and petted all her life until she married.

Hawk…

Hawk was so wonderful, so handsome. Strong, yet gentle. Proud, but kind. Firm, yet tender. Many of the young women in the valley looked at him with longing, secretly envying Victoria because she had won his heart. He was different, exciting, forbidden. A few of the families in the valley refused to accept him because he was a half-breed, but most of the valley people accepted him for the fine man he was, just as they had learned to accept Shadow.

Victoria smiled. Hawk and Shadow were much alike in both looks and temperament. She recalled the night they had told Hawk’s parents that she was pregnant. Hannah and Shadow had been sympathetic and understanding. They had not yelled at her or thought she was bad. Why couldn’t her own parents have been like that? Her mother had burst into tears, sobbing hysterically that the family name had been ruined forever. Her father had pulled a gun on Hawk and ordered him out of the house. When Hawk was gone, her father had ordered her to pack her bags. “
You’ll be on the first train headed east!
” he had threatened. But she had refused. For the first time in her life, Victoria had stood up to her father. Horace Bannerman had turned purple with rage. “
How can you be so ungrateful after all we’ve done for you?
” he had shouted. “
We’ve given you everything you’ve ever wanted and this is how you repay us? By sneaking off with that dirty half-breed like a damn squaw! Get out of my house, you harlot!
”

Victoria shook her head with the memory. Hawk’s family had welcomed her into their home with open arms, and they had been kindness itself ever since. Why couldn’t her own parents have been forgiving and understanding? Why had they left her, frightened and alone? She thought of Jason and Jacob and knew that no matter what mistakes they might one day make, she would never turn her back on them. Never.

With a sigh, she opened her eyes and resumed mending Hawk’s shirt. She was a big girl now. She didn’t need her mother and father to lean on anymore. Hannah had managed to raise three children and keep house in circumstances far worse than those Victoria now found herself in. Hannah had given birth to Mary in the wilderness with no doctor available, no midwife to help her. She had lived in a wickiup, cooked over an open fire, worn clothes of deerskin. She had grown all their fruits and vegetables, or harvested those that grew wild. She had skinned wild game, ridden to war with Shadow.

Victoria gazed at her surroundings. She had a house with four stout walls and a good roof, furniture that was comfortable if not elegant, clothes to wear, food to eat, two beautiful children. There was a doctor in town if she got sick. There were friends to talk to, a church where she could worship, stores to shop in. And there was Hawk to love. What more could she ask of life than what she already had?

She ran to the door when he came home, her blue eyes warm with love as she lifted her face for his kiss. No matter what hardships they might face, no matter what the future held, she would never be sorry she had married Hawk.

She was happier that night than she had been in weeks. She sang as she prepared dinner, hummed softly as she nursed her sons. How sweet they were, how dear. They were a part of her love for Hawk and his for her, tangible proof of their devotion. Smiling, she kissed each child, marveling anew at how small they were, how soft their skin was. She had not had much to do with babies until she had her own, and everything they did charmed her.

Later, she and Hawk sat side by side before the hearth, each holding a baby. They laughed, beaming with pride as the boys cooed and smiled at them.

Lying in Hawk’s arms in bed that night, Victoria was blissfully happy. She loved being in his arms, loved the touch of his hands sliding along her flesh, the way his lips teased her own before claiming her mouth in a fiery kiss that sent sparks clear down to her toes.

Her hands played over his back and chest, delighting in the way his muscles moved beneath her fingertips. He was so strong, so much bigger than she was. She had always been a little afraid of very big men, but she had never been afraid of Hawk. He had a gentleness, a goodness, that few people ever bothered to discover.

She thrust her hips upward, suddenly anxious for him to possess her, wanting to be a part of him, to feel that he was a part of her.

Victoria’s enthusiasm fired Hawk’s desire and his arms crushed her close. Her breasts were soft and warm against his chest, her lips sweeter than nectar as he kissed her, his tongue savoring the taste of her.

She had blossomed since the twins were born. Her breasts were fuller, her hips a little rounder. Her figure was no longer girlish but that of a woman, and he loved every silken inch, loved the way she made little purring sounds as he claimed her for his own.

Her fingers kneaded his back, her nails raking the skin, then sliding along his shoulders to trace the muscles in his arms. Fire trailed in the wake of her touch. Closing his eyes, Hawk breathed in her scent, finding it warm and womanly and exciting.

He whispered in her ear, telling her that he loved her, extolling the beauty of her face and figure, and then she was whispering back, pouring out her love in a torrent of words even as his seed spilled into her.

Sated, they fell asleep in each other’s arms.

Victoria was humming cheerfully as she dusted the mantelpiece. It was a lovely day, and she was filled with a sense of peace and contentment. Hawk was outside, chopping wood. Jason and Jacob were sleeping peacefully in their beds, a cherry pie was cooling in the kitchen window. She was about to lay her dust rag aside when she heard a knock at the front door.

Probably Hannah, Vickie thought. She ran a hand through her hair and smoothed her skirt as she went to open the door. For a moment, Victoria could only stand there, staring at the woman who had knocked at the door. She opened her mouth to speak, but no words would come.