Reckless Desire (26 page)

It was going to take some getting used to, Mary thought, learning to order servants about and living in a mansion. But then, if Frank would just be understanding and reasonable, perhaps she wouldn’t have to get used to it at all.

She squared her shoulders as they returned to the parlor. The sooner she said what needed to be said, the better.

“Frank, we need to talk.”

Frank looked at Mary expectantly. He had seen the wonder in her eyes as he showed her the house, seen the realization dawn in her expression as she came to understand that her husband was a very wealthy man. Now, Frank thought smugly, now she’ll realize this is where she belongs.

Frank smiled as he sat down on the sofa, patting the place beside him.

“Frank…”

He was looking at her expectantly, and Mary realized that what she had to say wasn’t going to be an easy as she had hoped.

“Frank, I didn’t come here for a reconciliation,” she said in a rush, hoping to get the words out before she lost her nerve. “I came to try to persuade you to give me a divorce.”

Frank Smythe stared at Mary, his eyes growing dark, his lips thinning with anger. “I don’t want to discuss it,” he said through clenched teeth.

Mary felt a tiny flutter of fear at the look on Frank’s face, but then she thought of Cloud Walker, of how much she loved him, and new courage flowed through her veins.

“Please, Frank. You don’t need me. Please let me go before we end up hating each other.”

Frank stood up, his eyes as hard as flint. “I would remind you to think of your daughter and what is best for her,” he warned in an ominous tone. “Do I make myself clear?”

Mary held Katherine tighter. “Yes, Frank.”

“Good. Now, why don’t you go upstairs and rest awhile? My family is coming for dinner tonight. They wanted to welcome you home. Drinks are at seven.”

“I’ll be ready,” Mary said dully.

Leaving the parlor, she walked upstairs to her room, her steps heavy with defeat. Placing Katherine on the bed, she slipped out of her traveling clothes and stretched out beside the little girl, who had fallen asleep.

Mary gazed lovingly into her daughter’s face. There had to be a way to convince Frank to end their marriage so she and Katherine could go back to Bear Volley where they belonged. In the meantime, she would make the best of things for Katherine’s sake, although it would not be easy living with Frank when it was Cloud Walker she longed for.

“Oh, Katherine,” she murmured unhappily, “what am I going to do?”

Drawing her daughter close to her breast, Mary dosed her eyes and drifted to sleep.

When she awoke, it was dark. Someone had laid out fresh underwear for her and lit a fire in the hearth to warm the room.

Rising, Mary felt a wave of panic engulf her when she saw that Katherine was gone. Heart pounding, she ran across the room and opened the door to the nursery. She breathed a sigh of relief when she saw Mrs. Anderson playing pat-a-cake with Katherine.

“Is anything wrong, ma’am?” the nanny asked.

“No, I…I just wanted to make sure Katherine was all right.”

“She’s fine, ma’am. We’ve become good friends, haven’t we, darling?”

Mary smiled uncertainly. Katherine did seem happy with Mrs. Anderson.

“Best get dressed, ma’am,” the nanny suggested. “Mr. Frank is expecting you downstairs in thirty minutes.”

“Yes, thank you, Mrs. Anderson.” Closing the door, Mary turned around to find Anna waiting for her.

The maid smiled. “I’m here to help you dress, ma’am,” she said with a curtsey. “What will you wear tonight?”

“I don’t know,” Mary said. “I hadn’t thought about it.”

Anna walked to the armoire and opened the doors. Inside hung dozens of dresses in a wide variety of styles and colors—silks and satins for formal occasions, day dresses of muslin and linen and cotton. There were hats and shoes and gloves to match each dress.

“My, my,” Mary murmured. Frank must have spent a fortune on clothes for her. But then, it was only fitting that she look the part of Frank Smythe’s wife, and that meant she must dress with style and flair, as befitting the wife of a wealthy man.

Anna reached into the armoire and pulled out a simple yet elegant gown of pale blue satin. “This, perhaps?”

“Yes, that will do,” Mary agreed listlessly. What difference did it make how she looked when Cloud Walker wasn’t there to see her?

Anna helped her dress, then arranged her hair in a most becoming fashion. A bit of rouge came next, adding a touch of color to her face, and Anna pronounced that she was ready to greet her guests.

Looking into a mirror, Mary felt that she was looking at a stranger.

Mattie and Leland Smythe were waiting for her in the sitting room, along with David, Gene, and Henry.

Frank smiled benevolently as Mary entered the room. “You look lovely, darling,” he said, crossing the room to bestow a kiss on her cheek.

“Thank you. How nice to see you all,” Mary said, nodding to the Smythes.

“Don’t you love this house?” Mattie gushed. “And wait until you see ours. It’s not quite so grand as this one, but it’s more than I ever dreamed of. Frank has been so generous.” She beamed at her son, who basked openly in his mother’s praise.

Mary nodded. “I’m sure your house is lovely.”

“Oh, it is. You must come over tomorrow and let me show you around.”

Mary nodded again, wishing that Mattie would stop carrying on about how wonderful Frank was.

Leland Smythe grinned at Frank, and then at Mattie. “I always knew Frank here would make something of himself, Mother,” he bragged. “He’s going to be a big success, just like Abel and Benjamin and Cabel.”

“And what do you boys want to do?” Mary asked, turning to David, Gene, and Henry.

David shrugged. “Frank’s going to get me a job on the railroad.”

“And I’m working at the Chicago Bank and Trust,” Gene announced.

“And I’m not working at all,” Henry said, grinning. “I’m going to college.”

“That’s wonderful,” Mary said.

Mattie beamed at her sons. “David is getting married in December.”

“Really?”

David nodded. “Yeah. I finally found a girl who would put up with me. She’s a knockout, Mary, wait until you meet her.”

They talked about David’s wedding until Manly announced dinner, and then they all went into the dining room.

Mary was amazed at the amount of food placed before her. Soup and salad, two kinds of meat, three kinds of potatoes, four kinds of vegetables, bread and rolls and biscuits. Manly kept her wineglass filled, and by the end of the meal she was feeling slightly tipsy. Then came dessert, and a glass of sherry.

By bedtime Mary was lightheaded and drowsy. Anna helped her undress for bed, and Mary was nearly asleep when Frank slid into bed beside her.

“Mary,” he whispered. “Are you awake?”

“Yes,” she murmured sleepily. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, nothing at all.”

Mary closed her eyes again, then gasped as she felt Frank’s hands fondling her breasts.

“Not tonight, Frank,” she protested. “I’m too tired.”

“You don’t have to do anything,” Frank murmured huskily. “Just lie back and enjoy it.”

“No, Frank, please.”

“Don’t ever tell me no,” Frank warned in a voice suddenly hard and cold. “You’re mine, and don’t you ever forget it.”

Mary started to protest, but some inner voice warned her to keep still. Frank was drunk and in a nasty mood. It would be foolish to argue with him now.

Closing her eyes, she surrendered to her husband’s lovemaking, her whole being screaming in protest as he possessed her, violently taking what she had lovingly given to Cloud Walker.

Mary wept bitter tears after Frank left her bed to go to his own room. Was this what her life would be like now? No love, no affection, just a quick bedding to satisfy her husband’s lust? She thought of the love and warmth in Cloud Walker’s embrace, how he held her afterward, his arms and lips sweet and tender in the afterglow of the passion they had shared. Cloud Walker had made her feel loved and cherished. Frank made her feel as though she had been used and tossed aside.

She cried until she had no tears left, and then she fell asleep to dream of Cloud Walker.

The next few weeks were a mixture of ups and downs. It was pleasant, living in a big house and having a dozen people to attend her every need. She spent hours with Katherine, watching her daughter learn and grow, smiling with pride as the child took her first steps. She bought Katherine dolls and toys and clothes, and delighted in watching her daughter’s eyes glow with excitement as she reached for colorful balls and stuffed clowns and wooden horses.

There were parties and grand balls, and Mary tried to have a good time. She wore beautiful clothes and danced with handsome young men and drank champagne and wine and pretended she was happily married. But at night she could not pretend. Her husband’s caresses left her cold, and she dreaded the nights he came to her bed. Sometimes she tried to pretend it was Cloud Walker’s mouth on hers, Cloud Walker’s hands stroking her breasts and thighs, but Cloud Walker had been kind and gentle, considerate of her likes and dislikes, sensitive to her needs and desires. Frank was selfish, almost ruthless, in his lovemaking, and she found it repulsive.

She turned her attention to charity work and began to spend time with those in need. She donated large sums of Frank’s money to the local orphanage and spent long hours with the children, making certain the sick were cared for, that the children had clothes and shoes and food on the table.

She went for long walks, she shopped in the finest stores, she went bicycle riding in the park. She had tea with Mattie Smythe. But no matter how she filled her days, Frank was always there at night.

She was welcomed in the finest houses now, and Mary thought it odd that her being half Indian had ceased to be important now that Frank was rich. The ladies in town bent over backward to make her feel welcome. They invited her to their teas and bazaars, included her in every party and social affair of the season, sought her advice about fashion, gushed over Katherine. Mary was always polite and agreeable. She returned their calls and invited them to her home, but all the while she was remembering how they had snubbed her before. And she knew she was accepted now only because Frank was in a position to help their husbands in their various occupations.

She had been back in Chicago for about five weeks when she began to feel nausea in the morning. At first she shrugged it off, thinking she might be catching the flu, but then, in a blinding flash of insight, she knew she was pregnant. Her joy at knowing that the baby had to be Cloud Walker’s soon turned to anguish. How could she tell Frank?

And then, out of despair came a ray of hope. Frank would not want her when he learned she was carrying another man’s child. Surely now he would give her the divorce she so desperately desired.

Frank Smythe swore under his breath when Mary told him the news. So she was pregnant and that Cheyenne buck was the father. His first impulse was to put his hands around her lovely little throat and strangle her. Bitch, he thought, lifting her skirts for that savage… Jealousy followed anger. She had never been particularly interested in the intimate side of marriage. Perhaps he had treated her too gently. Perhaps she liked it rough. His rage grew as he thought of Mary submitting to another man, and then he laughed grimly. She submitted to her husband because it was her duty, because it was expected. She had not submitted to that damned savage, he thought bitterly. No, she had gone to him willingly enough. By damn, he would kill her.

But then the cool hand of caution overcame his anger. A divorce would not suit his plans at all. He would just swallow his pride and pass the brat off as his. Everyone knew that Mary was part Indian. No one would suspect that the child was not his.

Frank rubbed a hand across the back of his neck. Sometimes it seemed that his life was a mess. Lila was pestering him to divorce Mary and marry her, but the thought of divorce did not sit well with Frank. People of good breeding did not divorce each other. They simply put up a good front in public and went their separate ways in private. Lila was a beautiful woman and a veritable tiger in bed, virtually everything a man could want in a mistress, but he was not certain she could make the grade as the wife of a wealthy man. She was too crude, too earthy. Frank had high ambitions. He was well-liked in Chicago, respected in business, and it was in his mind to go into politics. That was where the power lay. But a man needed a good reputation for that. A lovely wife and children at his side. A clean bill of health, so to speak. Divorce always caused a certain amount of ugly gossip and speculation. Yes, the baby must appear to be his. After all, he thought with disgust, it could not look more Cheyenne than his own daughter.

Frank eyed Mary sternly. “No divorce,” he said curtly. “Don’t mention it again.”

Mary stared at her husband in disbelief. Why was he being so stubborn? He didn’t love her. He didn’t love Katherine. Why wouldn’t he let them go?

“Frank, please.”

“I said don’t mention it again. You are my wife, and you will remain my wife for as long as it pleases me. Perhaps in a few years when my reputation is solid enough to withstand the scandal, I might let you go, but not until then. Is that clear?”

“Yes, Frank, quite clear.”

“Good.” Frank smiled magnanimously. “It’s almost time for dinner, my dear. We mustn’t keep my family waiting.”

With a nod, Mary left him and went to dress for dinner. Only in the privacy of her own bedroom did she let the tears flow.

She tried to run away the following week, and it was then she discovered that Frank had suspected she might try to go back to Bear Valley and had hired someone to keep an eye on her. She was standing in line to buy a ticket on the first train west when a tall limn appeared at her side.

“Shall we go home, Mrs. Smythe?” the man said, taking her elbow.

“I don’t want to go home just now,” Mary said. She clutched Katherine to her breast, her nervousness transmitting itself to the baby, who began to cry.