Rebel Temptress (Historical Romance) (19 page)

"Lord, do I not know it. And I will tell you something else, I do not even know how Honor feels about me, she has never said she loves me, though I do not think she loves her husband."

"What are you going to do?"

"As I said, I am going to Virginia the quickest way possible. I pray Honor has not suffered because of me."

Suzanne did not try to dissuade him. "When will you leave, Adam?"

"As soon as possible. I did not tell you that when she was forced to sell her plantation, I was the one who purchased it. Unknown to her, I had a man looking after her. When her home came up for sale, he purchased it on my behalf."

Suzanne kissed her brother's brow. "Adam, I fear this will all end in heartbreak for you."

"Most probably you are right, but I must go to her all the same, in case she needs me."

She smiled impishly. "It is difficult for me to picture you in love, Adam. You have left a trail of broken hearts across the whole state of Massachusetts."

"Maybe this trip will help me get Honor out of my system."

Suzanne stood up suddenly. "Take me with you, Adam. I have always wanted to see the South."

"What about Brad and the children?"

"The children will go with us, and it will do no harm for Brad to be without me for a short time. Maybe he will appreciate me more when I return," she said, smiling.

"He already appreciates you, and who wouldn't, my beautiful sister."

"As I look like you, I will return the compliment."

Adam's eyes took on a faraway look. "You will like Honor, Suzanne."

"She must be special for you to love her so much."

"Strange, wouldn't you say? I finally give my heart, and it is to a woman who has not even said she loves me in return."

13

The weeks passed as spring turned into summer, and a warm breeze moved over the Shenandoah Valley.

Jordan kept himself busy, spending as much time away from the house as he could manage. Meagan still remained with them, not bothering to find a place of her own.

The times when everyone was together were tension-filled. There were strong undercurrents making these times unbearable for everyone. Meagan never missed a chance to torture Honor with her little innuendos, and she continued to pursue Jordan openly.

Jordan and his son were becoming close. Little Aaron liked to tag after his father, and Jordan welcomed his son's devotion. Jordan's eyes would often follow his wife, but he made no further attempt to approach her on a personal level after the quarrel they had had in his bedroom.

Maggie watched and waited, knowing things could not continue as they were for much longer.

It was the last week in June; the day was hot and humid. Jordan was home early for a change. Finishing his paperwork, he opened the study doors and walked jut into the garden for a breath of fresh air. He had been pushing himself hard, and he felt weary.

He noticed Honor working in the flower garden, and as he approached her, she held a bunch of white roses out to him for inspection.

"The first blooms of summer," she said as he took the roses from her. "I want to fill the house with the fragrance of roses, Jordan. They are my favorite flowers."

Honor wore a pale green gown, and although it was faded from many washings, Jordan thought she looked lovely.

"I believe the rose to be one of God's greatest creations, Jordan. See how perfectly the petals are shaped, and they are so soft and velvety."

"Yet even the rose pales beside your beauty, Honor."

She looked up at him. "You flatter me, Jordan."

He touched her cheek softly. "Not so, Honor. I merely spoke the truth." He slipped his arms around her. "Shall we try again, Honor?" he said in a deep voice. His lips were near hers, and she knew he was going to kiss her. "I love you, little one."

The sound of the old endearment caused Honor to" allow him to kiss her. His lips covered hers softly, and for a moment she felt the pull of the Jordan of old. When he released her, they stood staring at each other.

"You are my wife, honey, and I need you." He laid his cheek against her soft skin. "I have loved you for a long time now. Please believe me. I do not know when I first began to love you. Maybe it has been there for a very long time. I only know my life means nothing if you do not share it with me. Please let me love you. I promise I will not frighten you. I will be so tender with you."

She considered for a moment. She had watched Jordan with their son. He was a patient and loving father. Could a man who had so much love to give a child be so bad? Honor was sure Jordan and Meagan had not been together. By the way Meagan acted it was plain she was trying to get him back, but so far she had obviously not succeeded. If he really did love her, as he said, would it not be right to live together as husband and wife? She would endure much to see her son happy.

"I do not know Jordan. Will you allow me to think about it for a while?"

"You will consider it, Honor?"

"Yes. I know we cannot go on the way we are at present."

"I will make you happy, little one, just give me the chance to prove it. Maybe the two of us could go away together for a while. Would you like that?"

"I will think about it Jordan," she said, immediately feeling fear at the thought of being alone with him.

He kissed her again, softly. "Think quickly, my love."

"Well, isn't this a domestic little scene," Meagan said, coming up behind them.

Honor flushed brightly and turned away, picking up the roses and walking toward the house. "If you will excuse me, I will put the flowers in water," she said, brushing past her sister.

Jordan glared at Meagan. "What do you want?"

"I want you, as if you did not know."

"Do us both a favor Meagan and do not say another word. If you were not Honor's sister, I would ask you to leave."

She moved closer to him and placed her hand on his shoulder. "You do not want me to leave, Jordan. You can remember how it was between the two of us."

"When I think of you and me, and how we once were, I feel sick inside. It was little more than lust; I know that now."

"Do you think my sister has what it takes to satisfy you, Jordan? My sister is not experienced enough to give you what you need." She moved closer to him and gave him her most seductive look. "I know how to please you. Remember how it felt when we made love?"

Jordan felt a sudden fire within his body. Yes, Meagan knew how to entice a man. His hands began caressing her arm, and against his will, he wanted to feel her beneath him once more. He had been with several women while he had been away fighting in the war, and at the time he had felt no guilt at seeking out a prostitute. He had not considered it being unfaithful to Honor, he had needed an outlet, and the women he had sought had provided it for him. But Meagan was different; she was Honor's sister.

Meagan's laughter startled him, and he realized he had drawn her into his arms. His anger surfaced, and he shoved her away roughly.

"Damn you for the slut you are, Meagan."

"If I am a slut, what does that make you, Jordan?" she taunted him.

"You make me sick, Meagan. Why can you not see that I do not want you? I love Honor."

The smile left Meagan's face. "Perhaps you do love her, Jordan, but you will never really possess her. She would never understand you or me, and if she did, she would despise both of us."

"What are you saying?"

"I am saying that Honor lives by different rules than you and I. She believes in the good in people until she is shown differently, while you and I ride roughshod over people and destroy anyone who gets in the way of what we want."

"That is ridiculous," Jordan said, knowing that Meagan had most probably summed up both of their characters correctly. His heart wanted to deny what his mind knew was true. He had hurt Honor with his blind selfishness, and if he got the chance, he would most probably do it again. But he loved her. Maybe if she would return his love it would be his salvation.

"I will be glad when you are out of my life for good, Meagan. You have caused me nothing but grief since I have known you."

"What about the grief my sister is causing you right now? I heard the argument you had with her about a certain Yankee major, Adam O'Roarke. Perhaps she gave him what she denies you."

"I will not listen to you, Meagan. Honor has told me that nothing occurred between her and that man, and I believe her."

"It might surprise you, but I believe her also. She is burdened with an affliction that you and I are not bothered by. Call it honor, or call it foolishness, you be the judge. I met Adam O'Roarke once. He is quite the most handsome man I have ever seen."

"When did you meet him?" Jordan asked, his eyes narrowing.

"When I first returned from Europe. I went to Landau, not knowing that my aunt was dead and Honor had married you. He was there."

"What was he doing at Landau?"

Meagan shrugged her shoulders. "I wondered myself at the time. He was so handsome," she taunted, "I practically swooned at his feet."

"What did he say to you?" Jordan asked, angry with himself for letting Meagan torment him and make him doubt Honor.

"He told me where I could find Honor. I recall asking him how he knew so much about my family, and he said he knew a great deal about them. Do you not find that odd, Jordan?"

"Get out of my way, Meagan," he said, pushing her aside angrily. Doubts nagged at him as her laughter followed him down the path and into the house.

That night at dinner the tension was so obvious one could feel it in the air. When dessert was served, Jordan shoved his plate aside and walked out of the room, refusing to look at his wife.

He lay on his bed, staring at the ceiling. Why did he let Meagan goad him into losing his temper? He cursed silently. His wife occupied a bedroom across the hall from him. He would give her tonight to consider being a true wife to him, and if she could not make up her mind by tomorrow he would drag her forcibly to his room. He wanted her more than he had ever wanted any woman, and he would have her, one way or another.

Jordan heard his bedroom door open, and he saw the outline of a feminine body. Honor had come to him, he thought. She walked slowly toward him, and Jordan drew in his breath as she held out her hand to him. He grasped it and pulled her down to' him.

"Honor, Honor," he said softly, as his mouth came down hungrily on hers. He opened his eyes in shocked surprise. "Meagan, what in the hell . . ."

Her laughter bubbled out.

"Honor would not come to you, Jordan, but I have." She slipped her arm around his neck and moved her body against his. "Kiss me, Jordan, you know you want to," she purred.

Her lips found his, and she felt him stiffen, but only for a moment, then he grabbed her and turned her over, pinning her body beneath him.

"Damn you, Meagan," he said as he ripped her gown down the front. It was Honor his body craved, but he had been too long without a woman, and at the moment anyone would service him, and Meagan was so desirable, her soft body stirring old memories.

Meagan moaned and writhed beneath him. Neither of them heard the door open, nor were they aware that Honor stood just inside the door, until they heard her gasp.

Honor felt herself rooted to the spot as she saw Jordan and Meagan in the dim light that came from the hallway. "My God, no, please," she cried as she felt her stomach churn. She clasped her hand over her mouth, fearing she would be sick.

Jordan pushed Meagan away from him roughly. "Honor, no!" he cried, knowing there was nothing he could say to make her understand that he was making love to her sister because it was she that he needed.

Honor forced her legs to move. She backed out of the door. She had to get away. Tears were running down her face, and her heart was shattered. Running out the front door and across the lawn, she stumbled and fell, but scrambling to her feet, she ran faster. It did not matter where she was going, as long as she got far away from the scene she had witnessed in Jordan's bedroom.

* * *

Jordan rose slowly from the bed and pulled on his britches. Not knowing what to do, he turned to Meagan, who was unusually quiet.

"I never meant for Honor to be hurt this way, Jordan. It seems that between the two of us, we have destroyed her."

"I cannot stand the sight of you, Meagan."

She rushed at him and began hitting him with her fists. "You lie! You love me."

Jordan grabbed her hands and pinned them behind her. "You disgust me."

Meagan began crying softly. "I never really meant to hurt Honor, Jordan, and now that I have I could die of shame. You may never want me now, Jordan, but you will never have Honor."

Jordan tucked his shirt into his britches. "I have to find her. God help me find her," he said as he rushed out of the room. If he found her, what would he say to her, he wondered. Could he say, "I love you, Honor, but I could not wait for you to come to me." If only he had known she would come tonight. Poor, sweet Honor, so truthful and honest; she would never forgive what had happened tonight. She was really lost to him now. He raced down the stairs, feeling sorry for himself and thinking how unfair life was.

* * *

Honor did not know how she got to the apple orchard at Landau. She had sought comfort in her agony, and her feet had brought her here. She leaned against the trunk of an apple tree and sobbed out her misery.

"Adam, where are you?" she cried. "Oh, Adam, I need you."

She felt comforting arms go around her, and she rested her face against a broad chest.

"I am here, Honor," Adam whispered. "I am here, darling."

Honor looked up, startled. At first, she thought in her confused state that she was hallucinating. She thought Adam was here only because she needed him so desperately.

"How did you get here, Adam?" she said between sobs.

"Does it matter, Honor? I am here."

Leaning against his shoulder once more, she cried out her grief. Gathering her into his arms, Adam sat down on the grass and held her as tenderly as if she were a baby. He did not try to stop her from crying, but rocked her in his arms, whispering soothing words of comfort to her.

"My little love, what has happened to cause you such unhappiness? I am here, darling. Nothing can be so bad that we cannot work it out together."

When at last her tears were spent, Adam wiped her face on his handkerchief, then he held her in his arms once more, waiting for her to speak.

Honor looked up into Adam's dark handsome face and saw love and concern written there. His strong arms brought comfort to her, and she wished she could stay with him forever and never face Jordan and Meagan again.

"I am confused, Adam. Why are you here?"

He rested his chin on the top of her head. "Did I not tell you that I would return, Honor?"