Reason and Romance (River Valley Book 1) (21 page)

Oh, he was saying all the right things. Most girls would have squealed at the “maybe we should take it slow” line, because it seemed so caring, but it was such bullshit. What he really meant was that he wanted to keep his options open. Now that he’d had her, he was bored already. So he was pacifying her with sweet words while his eye roved somewhere else.

This
was what Jason had done.
This
was how he’d fooled her.

He’d made vague noises about “renewing” their relationship. He’d promised they would talk on the phone more. He’d promised they would hang out more and that sex wouldn’t be a part of it. He’d bought her nice little presents. And while he’d said and done all of that, he’d been banging Stephanie Frost behind her back.

She had been so desperate to believe in him. So desperate and fucking needy because she wanted to be loved. She’d let him past her walls, and look at what had happened. And now Alex was doing just that.

No, she wasn’t about to let it happen again.

“I see,” Adrian said coolly. “You want us to know each other better?”

Alex hesitated, then shrugged. “When you put it like that, yes.”

“And what exactly does this entail? Long, heartwarming talks by the fireplace? Us holding hands in the school hallways? I don’t know how to tell you, Alex, but you may have noticed that we’re going to be related.”

“So?”

“So people are going to talk if we snuggle in public. Do you want us to have private little hookups? No, wait, you want us to get to know each other better. Let’s talk about our favorite music, shall we?”

His eyes narrowed. He’d evidently picked up on her tone because when he smiled, it was more like a glitter of teeth. “Do you have a problem with that?”

It was her turn to hesitate. She could just lean forward and kiss him. She could do it, she knew. The moment would pass, and they could go back to—what?

Her thoughts stuttered to a stop. She didn’t have a future with Alex. She’d mocked him about holding hands in the school hallway, but the reality was that they never could. Everyone knew about their parents, and they would never let her forget. Back at home, they’d whispered about her mother behind her back. People here didn’t know about that sordid family history, but what if they found out? Then they would say she was just like her mother.

No, no, no.

It took all of her courage to look at Alex. “I don’t have any problem. The sex was great. So, thanks.”

Those green eyes burned. A muscle jerked in his cheek, but if not for the tightness around his mouth, she wouldn’t have known he was clenching his teeth. “Why do I have the feeling you just dismissed me like a stud? Well, if that’s how you want to play it …” He yanked her toward him. “Thanks, doll. You’re a good fuck.”

“You’re welcome. Like I said, you get a passing grade.”

“You’re a real bitch, Adrian. Has anyone ever told you that?”

“Yes, I am. Didn’t stop you from fucking me, did it?”

“Only because you wanted me to.”

There was just enough truth in that statement to make her wince. Suddenly Adrian couldn’t stand being in the same bed with him anymore. She swung her legs out, but she couldn’t resist one final glance over her shoulder.

“Hormones. You know how they work. And if we’re continuing the name-calling, then you’re a real bastard,” she said.

Alex rolled out of the bed. He didn’t seem to care that he was naked because he was grabbing at his clothes. “Yeah. Not that it stops you from fucking me all morning. And that boyfriend. Remember him? The guy you wasted three years on. Tell me again, how did that relationship work out for you, baby?”

She sucked in a breath. And because she didn’t want him to have the satisfaction of seeing her cry, she yanked the bedsheet and wrapped it around her body.

“You’re comparing yourself to Jason? Well, that makes sense. You’re both cheaters.”

“I’m not a cheater. Mandy and I weren’t a couple, but she sure as hell was better in bed than you.”

Adrian didn’t think she could hate him more than she did now. “You’re the biggest mistake I’ve ever made. Not even Jason was this bad.”

“Baby, he broke your heart, if you even have one. With me, at least you get off.”

“You’re such a fucking pig!”

A cold, gorgeous smile lit up his face. “Is that actual anger I’m hearing? Actual emotion? My God, don’t tell me that’s possible.”

Every word pierced her heart. The world blurred and wavered. She kept her eyes deliberately wide, so no tears would fall. In a minute or two, she would lose it, and wouldn’t that be the greatest humiliation of all?

“Get the fuck away from me,” she whispered.

“This is my room, princess.” Alex pointed at the door. “And that’s your exit.”

Adrian shot him a burning glare. She grabbed all of her clothes and marched from the room with her head high. God, what a fucking mistake Alex was. She’d known that from the very start, but she’d jumped into bed with him again. Well, she didn’t have that problem anymore.

She would never have him again. Ever.

The realization staggered her so much that she doubled over in actual pain. She groped blindly for the bathroom door and stumbled inside. Her nerveless fingers fumbled for the lock and she collapsed to the floor. Oh God.

She pulled her knees to her chest. Her head was buzzing, her eyes gritty, but as she rocked back and forth, she could still smell him. Her hair, her skin—they all smelled like Alex. How long would it take her to scrub off his scent?

Her teeth sunk into her lower lip. When she marshaled the courage to look at the mirror, she wished she hadn’t. He’d left hickeys all over her neck and her breasts. It would take one hell of a makeup job to cover them all. There were bruises on the inside of her thighs and even her hips. She’d gasped in his arms and begged for more.

Her stomach lurched, and she scrambled for the toilet. It was only a dry heaving, so she didn’t throw up anything, but she was wrung out like a rag when it was over.

Panting, she gripped the edges of the bathroom counter. “You can do it, Adrian,” she whispered. “You can.”

Alex’s door was closed when she got out of the shower and went to her bedroom. It took a few tries to get dressed and do her makeup, but she didn’t care. She’d gone on autopilot anyway. She couldn’t think or feel.

The house was eerily quiet. Her father and Karen still hadn’t returned with the kids, and she guessed they must have stayed at the counseling session longer than planned.

Despite her better judgment, her eyes were drawn to Alex’s door. Was he still there? Maybe …

She knocked, but there was no answer. And when she twisted the doorknob, it opened easily and she was looking at an empty room. The bed was still rumpled and the pillows were on the floor, but Alex wasn’t there. And when she unwillingly walked to the garage, she saw that his car wasn’t there either. That son of a bitch had left.

Her jaw trembled. “Fuck you,” she whispered.

Her car was still in the garage, so she stumbled toward it. As she belted herself in, she punched in Travis’s number with fingers that shook and betrayed her. She honestly didn’t expect him to pick up, but he answered right away.

“Can you meet me at school?” she whispered. “Ten minutes?”

“In five, dude!”

That won a wan smile from her. She could survive this; she could.

Travis was waiting when she pulled into the empty school parking lot. Since it was Saturday, there was no one around, and Adrian was grateful. At least she wouldn’t have to face the whispers until Monday. Only then did it occur to her that she should have asked Travis for the directions to his house.

He peered at her face when she got out of her car. “Aw, fuck.” Even his spiky hair seemed to deflate when he sighed. “Come here, dude. What’s wrong?”

“I just …” She stood there, trembling under the hot sun. “I did something really stupid. I don’t know how to fix it.”

“We’ll fix it.”

“No, we can’t.”

“What happened?”

Her eyes swam with tears. “I don’t know,” she whispered, her voice so choked with grief that she could barely speak, “but no one ever wants me.”

The pain was so great that she collapsed in his arms and then, wonder of wonders, Travis was there, holding her upright.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

It was past midnight when she went home. Travis had insisted on taking her to his house and piling her with ice-cream and every sugary confection known to mankind. “The best cure for a broken heart,” he’d claimed. They had eaten their way through mint ice-cream and watched bad movies on his laptop.

She’d braced herself for another confrontation with Alex, but luckily, his car wasn’t in the garage or the driveway. He sometimes stayed with his father, she knew, so he was probably at his father’s house. Or maybe he was hooking up with another girl.

The thought made her stomach clench in dread. He wouldn’t do that so soon, would he? But she knew there were plenty of girls who wanted to hook up with him. What was to say he hadn’t already moved on?

Her eyes burning, Adrian scrubbed at her face. She had no business thinking about him that way. If only her body and mind would listen. Every time she closed her eyes, she relived the feel of Alex’s body against hers. And when she tried to turn her thoughts somewhere else, she saw him doing the same things with another girl.

She pressed her hand to her abdomen. He was just a guy. If she wanted to have sex again, she could hook up with another guy—no, she couldn’t.

“I hate you, Mother,” she whispered to the darkness.

It was her little secret. Her father seldom spoke about her mother. No bitter word ever escaped his lips, but Adrian couldn’t—and didn’t—forget the screaming fights her parents had had. And when Marissa Blake had died, a seven-year-old Adrian had looked at her cold face in the casket and felt only relief. She had never cried for her mother.

And yet she’d cried for Alex.

The thought made her laugh. God! Alex wasn’t worth it; her mother hadn’t been worth it; and everything was shit.

Move on, Adrian, move on.

When Monday rolled around, she was more than ready. She’d never so eagerly looked forward to school, but being surrounded by other people and being preoccupied with classes would take her mind off things.

Even so, she was tense when she got out of her car with Nicky. What if Alex had told his friends about their fight? It wouldn’t take much effort on his part to turn the school against her. And then she’d lose all and any ground she’d gained.

She saw that she needn’t have worried because people just nodded respectfully. Relief flooded her heart as she shouldered her backpack. The first day back at school was always the hardest. Her hands were shaking, but after a quick restroom stop, she’d just get over it in a few minutes.

She was washing her hands in the restroom when Travis stuck his head inside. His hair was always spiky, but today, it looked as if he’d yanked and run his hands through his hair out of pure exasperation. Spiky tufts of hair were standing this and that way. The other girls screamed, and he flapped his hands at them.

“Shoo! Shoo!”

Adrian turned the faucet off. “Travis, what’s wrong?”

His face grim, he just shook his head. “Shoo!” As soon as he’d gotten rid of three highly indignant girls, he checked under the bathroom stalls to make sure they were alone. He locked the door.

“What’s going on? Travis, you’re freaking me out.”

“Dude, I’m freaked out.” He was bouncing up and down on his toes, but every now and then, he would lurch his body to either side, as if he wasn’t quite sure what he was supposed to do. “Fuck, dude. I saw them with my own eyes. You need to know.”

“Know what? Just tell me.”

“Montgomery has a new girlfriend.”

The words didn’t sink in. Alex had a girlfriend? But that couldn’t be. He always hooked up with girls like Mandy, but he kept it casual.

“Alex?” she said.

“Yeah.”

Travis was still talking, but she couldn’t hear him. She still had the crumpled paper towel in her hands, but the trashcan was in the corner, and she’d forgotten how to use her legs.

“Don’t play with me,” she whispered.

“Dude, I’m not playing.”

Adrian caught her breath so sharply that it hurt. “When did he start dating his new girlfriend? I thought he wasn’t seeing anyone.”

“Just now.”

“I don’t understand. How do you know?”

“I saw them walk from the parking lot, holding hands. Like five minutes ago.”

There wasn’t any air in the restroom. “Who is she? Who?”

“Bri Latimer.”

It felt like a slap to the face. Justin’s sister? That couldn’t be. Adrian didn’t count Bri among her friends, but Bri wasn’t an enemy either. Bri was Justin’s twin sister, and Justin was one of Alex’s closest friends.

Her stomach began to churn. Bri had been voted in as Homecoming Queen, hadn’t she? Yes, Bri had asked Alex to the dance, Adrian remembered. Maybe Bri had nursed a crush on him for years. Why would she agree to be his girlfriend? Why had he approached her in the first place?

“I don’t believe you,” she whispered. “Not her.”

“Adrian.”

The fact that he’d even said her name had her trembling. It was real; it was suddenly too real. She closed her eyes, trying to shut out Alex’s memory, but when she opened her eyes, Travis was watching her with a concerned expression.

“I’ll just …” She tossed the towel at the trashcan and missed.

Travis picked up the crumpled wad and disposed of it. He was just stepping toward her when someone banged on the locked restroom door from outside.

“Let me in, I know you’re in there. Travis!” Vaughn said.

Travis turned to Adrian. “Dude?”

Her shoulders slumped. “Whatever. She probably just wants my reaction or something.”

But when Travis unlocked the door and let the other girl in, Adrian saw that she’d been mistaken.

There was color in Vaughn’s cheeks. She closed the door behind herself and stood in front of it, so no one else could come in. “Thank God you cornered her,” she said to Travis. “Does she know yet? Adrian, listen, I have news, and you won’t like it—”