Randa (4 page)

Taking Randa by the arm, they started walking toward the back of the property. As they entered the gardens, they looked around in awe at the beauty. The bright colors proved to be a rewarding palette and John caught himself enjoying the look of wonderment on Randa’s radiant face. They continued along the path, occasionally pausing to gaze at the pink, red, and white impatiens and the colorful summer snapdragons. There were numerous waterfalls built into the scenery. The path ahead led into a thicket of trees. They looked at each other and Randa smiled at the thought of a mini-adventure into the woods. They hadn’t talked much since entering the garden, but it was a comfortable, pleasant silence. Once into the woods, they came upon a sparkling stream and stopped to enjoy the blissful sound of the clear water lapping over the rocks. Randa reached down, putting her hand into the cool water and letting it flow up to her wrist in an attempt to feel the soothing serenity that it emitted. Gazing down at her, John wanted to pick her up and take her into his arms. He reluctantly dismissed his desire and simply offered her his hand when she looked up at him. Grabbing it, she rose and followed him as he led the way across. John hoped that he wasn’t overstepping the bounds with this trek, but there was a very special place that he wanted to show Randa.

“Are you okay?” John asked her.

“I am fantastic! I love being outdoors. My grandparents lived in the country and the times that I spent at their place during my childhood are some of my favorite memories. They lived at the end of a road and their land backed up against a river. I enjoyed so many summer afternoons sitting on that secluded riverbank just thinking, writing in my journal, and enjoying the peacefulness.”

“Ahhh,” John replied, smiling and obviously pleased with her response. His ideal female was one who not only looked elegant and beautiful, but also one who could truly take pleasure in being comfortable in the outdoors. “Then you should like what we are about to see.”

Coming to a fence that separated Noel and Wade’s property from his own, John held the barbed wire as far apart as he could, so that Randa could get through it without getting her hair or her clothes caught on the sharp barbs. They entered a clearing and saw a pond just ahead. It wasn’t a normal pond, which was usually brown and muddy. The sky reflected down on the water, giving it a brilliant dark blue hue. The banks were made of flat, stacked rocks with bright, beautiful azalea bushes in a variety of colors, including reds, whites, mauves, and pinks covering surfaces everywhere. Large green lily pads, stately cattails and weeping pussy willows with their fluffy silvery catkins and studded golden anthers added charm to the scenery. The outer trees were tall enough to give the place an aura of being a million miles away from everything. Randa sucked in her breath. It was a piece of paradise exquisitely taken from the heavens above and placed right here on Earth. There were two benches on the bank. Claire had placed them there years before when she discovered the pond. John loved their visits to this small piece of heaven when he was a child. Now they provided a seat for the couple.

They began to share details about their lives such as family and jobs.

“You actually wrote ‘Hitching?’” John asked Randa

“Yes,” she said with the biggest and brightest smile ever. “‘Hitching’ was in the number one spot on the charts for sixteen weeks. You look so flabbergasted.”

“I am,” John replied, “a little bit. It’s just that I strongly identify with some of the lyrics of the songs you’ve written, like I could have penned them myself.”

“That is wonderful John and it makes me feel so good! When I write I always hope that I am expressing what someone else really doesn’t know how to and then they hear my song and they say something like, ‘this is my song’ or ‘this song describes exactly how I feel.’”

He could not resist asking her, “How do you come up with the lyrics?”

“Most of the time, it’s my personal feelings. For example, “Hitching” is the song talking about my search for what I call
The One
for me that I think is somewhere out there. I really feel all of those things and I will look high and low and far and wide and I won’t stop until I find
him
or until he finds me,” she giggled. “And I know that when we are finally together, our love will be so rare and so true that we will be together forever. I wrote that song right before I graduated from college, though many of the lyrics I had jotted down years before. In fact, that was the song that got both Taylor and I discovered.”

“I love that song Randa. Often I have felt the same way about
The One
being somewhere out there for me too, but sometimes,” his voice trailed off, “I think it’s all a dream that other people get to realize, but one that will never come true for me.” John was surprised at what he had just said. Not because it wasn’t true, but because he was sharing his deepest feelings with her.

Silence permeated the air for a moment, but Randa assured him, “Almost everyone feels that way from time to time. I know I do. Just know that it is completely normal to feel that way and don’t let the pessimistic feelings remain in your thoughts.”

“So, you’ve never been married or even engaged?” Randa asked, changing the conversation and intent on satisfying her curiosity all at the same time.

“Oh no, I haven’t even been in a long-term relationship since I was in college. And she wasn’t even someone that I was totally crazy about. It just seemed to be the ‘right thing’ to do at the time.”

“I don’t picture you as a person who would just do something because of peer pressure or because you care what other people think.”

John laughed, “I’ve always tried to be a good person and do the things that I am ‘supposed’ to do. I’ve always been the ‘good son’ and the ‘good student’ and on and on. In essence, that’s what I am. That girl from college was nice and we had a lot of fun, but I knew that I would never marry her. She just wasn’t
The One
for me as you would say. There was something missing. When I do meet the ‘right’ one for me, I will harbor no doubts.”

Now it was Randa’s turn to sit in startling silence. She could definitely identify with something always missing in the people that she dated.

“Since then I’ve been on the North Slope. Sometimes when I come home, I do get fortunate enough to have a great date with someone, usually a blind date arranged through a friend, but then the woman won’t have the patience to let a relationship with me grow when I am over 4000 miles away. She gets bored or we don’t have love to use as a foundation to build upon.”

“So, what about you Randa, how is it that with all of your insight, talents, passions and not to mention your stunning beauty that you don’t fall to sleep each night in the strong arms of a man who truly appreciates all that you are?

Randa glanced out at the calm waters, letting them guide her thoughts. “It’s as simple as not having met
The One
yet. Some people may look at that as a fantasy or a fairytale. The last thing I would ever do is to
settle
. It’s not that my requirements are set too high or are impossible to meet. It’s as you said, that there always seems to be something
missing
. But my faith never wavers. For one thing, I think that you truly have to ‘believe’ for something like everlasting love to come to you. Everything that I have ever truly felt strongly about has come true. I imagine in my mind what
The One
will be like. I believe with every fiber of my being, to my very core, that he and I will meet and live happily ever after. I imagine us doing lots of things together.” Randa blushed immediately after saying it, but John did not take it out of context, he was just listening intently.

John turned and looked at Randa. She looked into his eyes. She was still trying to figure out exactly which color of blue they were. Was it cornflower or periwinkle?

“Randa, have you and I ever met before?”

“No, I don’t think so. Why do you ask?”

“It just seems like we have. You seem so familiar, but it’s more than that, though I can’t quite put my finger on it. “

Oh yes, it’s much more than that
Randa thought.
It’s the fact that I could hardly breathe when Fox was introducing us because my heart was racing madly. It’s that when you touched my hand to shake it, and each time you’ve touched me since, my senses became enthralled, and they cried out for more. It’s that every time you look at me with those beautiful blue eyes, time stands still. It’s that when you speak to me, my spirit is drawn to the urgent calling of yours fiercely seeking its impassioned destiny. It’s that when I get close enough to inhale your scent, an ache inside of me comes roaring to life.

They began to compare a few places or events where their paths might have crossed, but there was no apparent connection.

“It is so tranquil here,” Randa reflected.

“It’s one of my favorite places on the ranch.”

It was starting to turn dusk. “C’mon Baby Doll. I need to get you back to the party.”

“What did you call me?” Randa looked at John with a puzzled expression.

John, just realizing what he called her, quickly said, “I’m sorry Randa. I’m not quite sure where that came from.”

“No worries John,” she said as she grabbed his hand and led the way back up the path.

Making their way back through the lush gardens, Randa and John were feeling and acting like a couple of carefree teenagers laughing and seeming to be sharing a private joke. Taylor spotted them and made her way toward them.

“Randa, you and John missed it! Noel asked me to sing and everyone loved it.”

“Of course they did Taylor,” Randa said. “You are always amazing. I’m so sorry we missed it. John would have undoubtedly enjoyed hearing you sing live. We went on a walk and he showed me more of the property. We came across a beautiful blue pond and there was a bench on one of its banks, so we sat down and talked and let the enchanting surroundings embrace us.”

“I’m afraid that the time slipped away from us Taylor. My apologies to you and Fox,” John said as he squeezed Randa’s hand that he was still holding.

John seemed more relaxed and carefree than Fox had seen him in years. When Buck and Claire got divorced, Fox knew that John lost a lot of his innocence. It was hard to watch, but there was little Fox could do other than to be there for John in times that he was needed, which were rare because John shrugged things off and tried to keep his sadness to himself.

John and Randa said their goodnights to the partygoers and he walked her to his home.

Opening the door, John stepped aside letting Randa enter the house first. “Can I fix you a drink?”

“How about a Mai Tai?”

John laughed. “The only reason that I know how to make one of these is because my mom drinks these too.”

“How wonderful! I don’t drink hard liquor, but I love a sweet, fruity drink.”

John nodded. He was so riveted by this beautiful lady. “Occasionally, I will have a mixed drink, but I prefer a nice ice-cold Budweiser Longneck,” he said as he handed her the drink and opened a beer for himself.

“Mmm thank you. It tastes delicious,” Randa said as she took a sip. John led the way into the grand living room. Randa glanced around, looking at the pictures displayed. They were the same ones that were on display the last night that John’s parents were together. That night was portentously etched into John’s memory. He remembered every word of the fight that had put an end to his parent’s marriage. New pictures were added through the years, but they were mostly all of John.

“Is this your Mom and Dad?” Randa asked pointing to a portrait hanging on the wall.

“Yes, that is Buck and Claire. They divorced when I was fifteen. My mother married Tom, the man she was having an affair with, shortly after I graduated from high school. Once she and my Dad divorced, she was rarely at home and my Dad has never returned to the ranch. Their fight that night woke me up. I heard everything. Overnight my world literally was turned upside down. My relationships with them changed and my nice orderly life turned into spending hours alone. Fox primarily became my parent during that time, besides already being a great friend and mentor to me.”

Randa could feel John’s deep sorrow.

“I’m so sorry for you.”

“Thank you Randa, but it happened a long time ago.”

“Unfortunately, time doesn’t always make the pain disappear.” Randa said briefly, glancing at him as she continued to move about the room. John marveled at her for a moment, intrigued at her uncanny ability to sense the somber tone in his voice, which attempted to mask his hurt. But since he had learned that she was the writer of many of Taylor’s songs, which had mirrored his deepest feelings, he really wasn’t totally surprised. This lady possessed a great deal of depth, which was most likely apparent to anyone who spent even the slightest amount of time with her.

Silently, John recounted the many wonderful times that he spent in this room with his Mom, Fox, and his Dad when he was home. Almost every one of John’s Christmases had been celebrated in this home as a family. There had been occasions when aunts, uncles, and cousins came to visit and by the end of the evening, everyone was gathered around the fireplace engaged in everything from playful banter to weighty conversations. Many weekends were spent inside watching movies or playing board games when the weather was too wet and the temperature was too cold to do anything other than feed and hay the cattle, play outdoors for a as long as they could stand the cold and then come back into the house.

Randa sat down on the leather sofa next to John, placed her hand on his for a moment, and turned toward him. Looking into his eyes, the twinkle in them danced before her eyes, delighting her heart.

John spoke, “I know that Fox has plans for the four of us to have dinner together tomorrow night. I don’t know what you and Taylor have in mind for the rest of the weekend, but I would love it if you and I could spend some time together tomorrow.”

“That sounds splendid John. Taylor has a cousin who lives nearby that she is going to visit, but I am free.”