Rainbow Blues (26 page)

Since he wasn’t going to be able to sleep until he’d talked to Luke, he might as well have company. “Sure. Let me see if I can figure out how to make us some coffee. Have a seat.”

Coffee. Oh fuck. That was an indulgence he hadn’t had since starting that damned diet. He was almost salivating. He assessed the cupboards, trying to figure out where he’d put coffee. The first one he opened was the right one, and he wanted to crow with success. He and Luke were still in tune.

There were some papers on the counter and Jimmy picked them up, wondering if they’d give him some clue as to where Luke had gone.

He picked them up and started to read. His breath came fast and hard, blood pounding in his ears, coffee forgotten.

“Jimmy, Jimmy, what’s wrong?”

Light-headed and dizzy, Jimmy waved the sheaf of papers at him. “These are papers to sell the house. Luke signed them yesterday.” Colored flags had been attached where Jimmy would have to sign to put their house—their home—back on the market.

How could Luke do this without even talking to him? If he’d eaten anything since he’d last puked, he’d be puking right now.

“Damian, was the article really that awful?” Jimmy’s voice cracked. This couldn’t be happening.

“Come on, you look like you’re going to keel over. Sit down.” Damian guided him to a chair.

Something crunched under his feet, and they both looked down.

“Uh, Jimmy, is this Luke’s phone?”

Frowning, he stared at the mess on the floor, barely able to comprehend what he was seeing. On the floor by the table lay scattered pieces of plastic, and on the wall, a blackish streak and crack in the wall as though someone had thrown the phone with great force against it.

Jimmy’s pulse sped up. “What…. You don’t think there’s been a break-in, do you?” Jimmy lowered his voice, pleading. He almost wished a break-in would explain it, but somehow he knew that article was to blame. Luke had seen it and was furious. The demolished phone certainly explained why Luke hadn’t returned any of his calls.

Damian gave him a sympathetic look. “I don’t think so, sweetie.”

“Why, Damian? Why wouldn’t he at least wait to talk to me?” Jimmy knew the article looked bad, but he was hurt that Luke hadn’t had more faith in their relationship.

“Sweetie, you haven’t seen each other in two months. And how many actual phone calls did you manage?”

“Three, but we talked about that. He understood.” Luke had sworn he’d understood that their schedules were at complete odds. Jimmy hadn’t liked it any more than Luke.

“Three. Long distance relationships are hard, and everyone knows actors often get their heads turned by costars. I know not all the tabloid stuff is real, but there’s no smoke without fire, right? And it’s not like we haven’t seen it at the playhouse from time to time.” Damian’s words were reasonable, logical, but they hurt.

“I should never have gone.” Jimmy wiped at the tears that wouldn’t stop coming.

“Don’t say that. You’ve done something most of us never have a chance to do. But….”

“But….” Jimmy repeated softly. “Luke might never forgive me.”

He clutched the small box in his pocket as though it were a talisman that could ward away this pain.

“You won’t know anything until you talk to him.”

Jimmy pulled out his own phone and scrolled through his missed calls, hoping Luke had called. There were so many of them, but he had missed one.

“Zach called. Just before I landed. Didn’t leave a message.”

The phone rang in his hand, and Jimmy answered before he even registered who was on the caller ID.

“Luke?”

“No, asshole, it’s Zach. Are you screening my calls?”

“Uh, no, I….”

“Whatever. Just thought you should know my dad was in a car accident.”

Jimmy’s head swam, and if he hadn’t already been sitting down, he’d have fallen. “What?”

“Don’t know if you care or not, but he’s going into surgery.”

“Zach, of course I care. What hospital?”

“Why? Gonna get your people to send flowers? Don’t bother. I don’t know why I even called.”

“Zach, please.” Jimmy could barely get the words past the lump in his throat.

At least Zach told him which hospital before clicking off. Jimmy looked helplessly at Damian.

“What happened?”

Jimmy swallowed a couple of times before he could say the words. “Car accident. Memorial Hospital.”

“Let’s go.”

Dazed, Jimmy let Damian guide him from the house, taking charge the same way he did at the playhouse. How bad had the accident been? When? Where?

Jimmy wanted answers, but he thought Zach would be more likely to give them to him in person.

“T
HERE
.” D
AMIAN
pointed, and Jimmy saw Zach and Ryan seated together.

Jimmy rushed over. “Zach. Please tell me how he is.”

Zach’s eyes widened. “How the hell did you get here so fast?”

Ryan reached out a hand. “Sit down. You look like hell.”

Then he looked a lot better than he felt. But he couldn’t sit yet. “Zach. Jesus. Is he okay? What happened?”

Zach pushed himself out of the seat and got in his face. “What do you care? He’s been fucking miserable, and it’s all your fault. And you come back now? When he’s hurt? If that’s what it takes, he doesn’t need you.”

The attack had Jimmy reeling, both metaphorically and physically. Damian stepped up behind him, propping him up.

Zach was right; Jimmy should have come home long before this. Clearly both he and Luke hadn’t been entirely honest with each other, otherwise Luke wouldn’t have made such a drastic decision without talking to Jimmy, but that was something Jimmy would have to work on, as long as Luke made it out of this okay.

“I’ve been traveling almost twelve hours. I was coming home. For good.” He wasn’t about to get into details of his relationship with Luke’s son, but he didn’t think Zach was going to unbend if Jimmy didn’t do something to placate him.

“Exactly.” Damian’s agreement wasn’t much, but it was something. “Jimmy’s a smart cookie, but he hasn’t developed teleportation in the past couple of days.”

“Damian!” Sarcasm wasn’t going to help.

Zach scrubbed his face, stress making him appear a lot older than he was. “You’re right. I’m sorry. I just….”

“You’re worried about your dad,” Ryan piped up. “We know. But look at Jimmy. Really look at him. He’s just as worried as you are.”

Jimmy threw Ryan a grateful smile. “I am. I love your dad, with all my heart.” He thought maybe Zach and Ryan hadn’t seen that stupid article, and he hoped they wouldn’t. Not until he had a chance to talk to Luke about it.

Zach did as Ryan instructed, and his reddened eyes started to water. “God. When they called me, I don’t think I’ve ever been so scared.”

Jimmy took a deep breath. He wanted to shake Zach, get him to tell him how the fuck Luke was, but he was maybe the substitute parent in this case. He had to be calm for all of them, even though he was quickly discovering that maybe wasn’t his forte.

“Did you tell your mom?”

“I did, but my sister’s got chicken pox and my step-dad’s out of town. She’s trying to find someone who’ll babysit a sick kid, but at the moment, I’m just updating her by phone.”

“Okay, and what was the last update?” Jimmy did his best to keep his tone even. Everyone in the waiting room was tense, and it wasn’t fair to subject them to his and Zach’s drama.

“For God’s sake, Zach, sit the fuck down.” Ryan had just lost patience with Zach’s dithering. “Jimmy, come with me to the cafeteria. We’ll get you a cup of coffee. Looks like you might need it.”

Ryan threaded his arm through Jimmy’s and led him away while Damian sat next to Zach.

“He’s freaking out.” Ryan’s tone was apologetic. “It’s the first time I think he’s had to deal with a hospital and his parents. When it wasn’t his mom giving birth, that is.”

“I can tell he’s freaking out, but I’m about thirty seconds away from my own meltdown. Please.” Jimmy’s voice cracked in his desperation. If someone didn’t tell him something, he was going to leap over the desk into the nursing station and start flipping through files.

“As far as we know, he went out to a bar last night and got shitfaced. Then he walked out in front of a car and got hit.”

Jimmy blinked. He wasn’t going to think about why Luke was getting shitfaced, but he had to revise the gory images he had in his head of mangled metal and the Jaws of Life. But an unprotected human against a couple tons of metal didn’t necessarily translate to fewer injuries.

“And?”

“Fortunately, the car wasn’t going fast, but he broke a femur. He’s in surgery now getting pins put in. I think the prognosis is pretty good, actually.”

“This is my fault.”

Ryan looked at him disapprovingly. “How could you cheat on LJ? He’s one of the best people I know.”

Fuck him sideways. Apparently Zach was the only one who hadn’t believed Jimmy would cheat. Or at least, Zach was the only one in the world who hadn’t seen that fucking article.

Jimmy lashed out with a fist and hit a wall. A nurse glanced up, eyes narrowed.

“Sorry, sorry.”

They continued on toward the cafeteria.

“I never cheated. It’s a long story, and one Luke deserves to hear first. But that article was complete bullshit.”

“Really? I mean, I was shocked when I read it, because you two seemed so in love, but if there wasn’t some truth to it, why would LJ get so drunk? He’s not much of a drinker.”

Ryan’s gaze slid sideways, but Jimmy didn’t press. Luke had never come out and said, but Jimmy suspected Luke had long ago given up getting buzzed around Ryan to make sure Ryan had a place he felt safe.

“No, he’s not. And he didn’t talk to me about it. I thought Luke would at least give me the chance to explain.” Jimmy’s voice wobbled. He was so fucking worried about Luke, but he hadn’t expected one miscommunication to result in Luke wanting to dissolve their relationship. That didn’t seem like Luke. Not when he’d always been so forthright, even to the point of being too forthright. “I thought this might end up being something we’d laugh over.”

“Really? He didn’t talk to you about it? That does seem weird. I know how much he missed you. Maybe it was just that messing with his head.”

Jimmy hoped so. “Will you help me? With Zach?”

Ryan nodded and bought him a coffee. Was this some sort of weird karmic revenge that his first cup of coffee in two months was at the hospital cafeteria waiting for his partner to get out of surgery?

L
UKE
BLINKED
his eyes open. The light was bright, and his head was swimmy, but he had no trouble recognizing a hospital room. He didn’t recall being the one on the bed before.

“Hey, you’re awake.” Jimmy’s voice, dusty and crackling like old parchment, sounded about as normal as Luke’s vision.

Jimmy’s beloved face moved into his line of sight, eyes bloodshot and deeply shadowed, but still as gorgeous as ever.

“Jimmy,” Luke croaked out. If Jimmy’s voice was old parchment, Luke’s was a dried out old fossil. Jimmy squeezed his hand and smiled down at him, a sad little smile.

Luke hated it when Jimmy was sad, but he didn’t have enough spit in his mouth to say so.

“The nurse left some apple juice for you. Want some?”

As his heart swelled with love for the world, he nodded. Apple juice. Sounded like the best thing ever.

Jimmy brought a plastic cup with a bent straw to his lips. He sucked, aware his lips were cracked almost to the point of bleeding, and his throat ached.

All too soon, Jimmy pulled the heavenly straw away, and Luke grunted.

“Not too much. You can’t overdo it.”

Luke lay there for a moment, hoping the cotton in his brain would disappear. Made it hard to think.

“What happened?”

“Well, love, seems you had a burning desire to tie one on, all by yourself. Got drunk as a skunk, then you wandered out in front of a moving car. Broke your leg, and they had to take you into surgery to fix it.”

He loved Jimmy’s voice, and his rambling. But his words didn’t make sense. Getting drunk wasn’t something he did often, especially not by himself.

“Juice?”

Jimmy let him have another sip before squeezing his hand and looking sad again.

“Don’t be sad. I hate it when you’re sad.”

The grip on his hand tightened. “Luke, you could have died. If that car had been going faster….” Jimmy’s eyelids fluttered, and he looked toward the ceiling. “I could have lost you. What were you thinking?”

Jimmy brought his hand up to his lips and kissed it, his tears warm against Luke’s chilled skin.

The cotton clouding his thinking began to disperse, and he began to remember. Remembered the article that outlined in a series of photos why his whole world was about to explode. Remembered lying on the kitchen floor, tears running down his face to wet the tile. Remembered calling the real estate agent to get the paperwork started for reselling the house. Remembered the agent being kind enough to accept his explanation that they were planning to flip the house, ignoring the fact he must have looked like some sort of demon-spawn alcoholic with chicken pox from all the crying. Remembered signing the documents and throwing his phone away before driving to a local pub and starting a tab.

Beyond that, there was a blank wall. Until now.

“What are you doing here?”

Luke didn’t expect Jimmy to lay his head down on his chest and start shaking with silent tears. Somehow, he untangled the IV enough so he could rest his hand on Jimmy’s back.

“I’m so sorry, Luke. Nothing happened, I swear. It was all a publicity stunt. You have to believe I would never cheat on you.”

There wasn’t enough moisture left in his body for Luke to cry his own tears, but his face still heated in preparation for them. A publicity stunt? He was going to need more information on that later, but one thing he could tell Jimmy now.

“I know you didn’t cheat on me.”

Jimmy lifted his head, expression incredulous. “You know? Then why do you want to sell the house? Did you…?” Jimmy’s breath hitched. “Did you meet someone else?”