Radiant Surrender (CSA Case Files Book 6) (10 page)

Who would he be forced to become? Travis Bowers was deceased long ago. Ryland was suffering a drawn out demise, but there was no mistaking the hollow sounding knock on death’s door. Could he become one of the aliases he’d designed over the years? Did any of them stand a chance at prolonged survival? Maybe the answer was a resurrection. Maybe Travis Bowers had some life in him after all. The risen Christ did it, so why not Travis? He grinned a brief smile as his image became clear in the mirror.

Ryland pushed himself off of the vanity without wiping the condensation from the mirror. He opened the bathroom door and entered the bedroom, hearing a voice drifting up the staircase from the living room below. It was after midnight so the agents were switching out their shifts. If he was correct in his assumptions Ethan Chambers was one of the men speaking. Ryland wondered how Taryn was doing after the so-called burial of their sister. He meticulously draped his towel over the heated towel rack to dry and then reached for the stylish terry blended cotton robe, compliments of the hotel as he thought of his childhood. An appreciation of his past came to the forefront and an omnipresent awareness arose, giving him affirmation that he was doing the right thing. Maybe, just maybe, Travis Bowers could be resurrected from the dead and he could pursue his family legacy after all.

*   *   *   *

Jessie rolled onto her side and stared into the fire. They’d only been in the cabin for a little over an hour and she couldn’t shut off her thoughts. First of all, she couldn’t bring herself to follow Gavin like a good little girl who didn’t know any better. She was so close to the information she needed to contact her parents’ handler that she’d made up her mind hours ago that she wouldn’t leave here without it in hand. How she was going to do that was another matter. The one good thing about having made that decision was that she was able to mull over what had taken place between her and Gavin. Her stomach was still filled with butterflies thinking of how secure his hold on her had been, along with the uncertainly of what he’d been going to do next. It was exhilarating and frightening all at the same time—just as he’d said it would be.

A man like Gavin took his life very seriously along with the compulsory decisions that were made along the way. It wasn’t that she didn’t, but she also understood that one needed to enjoy the happier times in life and relish the day-to-day moments that presented themselves. Most women would have given up on him long ago. They would have walked away at the first sign of rejection and claimed he wasn’t worth their time or effort. She’d admit that she’d held on for far too long and had to distance herself for her own sanity, but if fate was handing her this eleventh-hour chance…she wouldn’t throw it away. She could see now that he hadn’t rejected her before. He’d just held himself back and she’d had to push him hard enough to reveal it. He’d said numerous times before that his soul was too dark for someone like her. Looking deeper into the meaning of his words, she finally comprehended that he had an underlying fear of allowing himself to step out of the darkness and take a chance on losing her forever. It was almost as if he didn’t think he deserved to have someone like her.

“If you’d close your eyes you might get a few hours sleep.”

“And you?” Jessie asked, not moving from her spot on the couch. She hadn’t wanted to leave the warmth of the fire so she’d chosen the sofa instead of the bed. Gavin’s voice came from the small kitchenette that was made of a five-foot long countertop, a small sink, and a miniature two-burner stove. They hadn’t really spoken since he’d felt the need to give her a time limit. “Are you going to sleep?”

“Not tonight,” Gavin replied before she heard the tink of metal. Jessie wanted to look over the arm of the couch to see what he was doing, but she thought that he wouldn’t continue talking if she did. “I’ll take watch. We’re a little too close to your old neighborhood for my liking.”

“Are we heading back to those apartments?”

“Yes, we are.” Gavin paused, as if talking about where she would be staying might open up that other door he seemed to be avoiding. He had basically given her what she wanted while at the same time delaying the inevitable. Jessie didn’t need the remaining hours until morning to make up her mind, but she already knew that he wouldn’t take her answer at face value if she said yes right now. He’d make her wait the allotted time, so until then she wouldn’t allow herself to fret over it. “Townes will be there to keep watch while I catch a few hours sleep, although he’s not very happy with you right now. The house rules will be altered accordingly, of course. We should have an answer on Ryland’s pardon tomorrow night.”

“Have you spoken to Lou Moser?” Jessie didn’t want to think about Townes right now and she couldn’t shut off the worry that her parents were in separate jail cells thinking that their youngest daughter was in danger of meeting the same fate as themselves. Obtaining the pardon might help her, but it wouldn’t do a thing for her parents. “Is there any update?”

“No.” Gavin was definitely to the point and he didn’t seem to be in the right frame of mind for Jessie to ask to speak to her sister. Jessie tugged the blanket a little higher and tried to relax, but his next question put her more on edge than she already was. “What’s at the house that you feel you need to risk your freedom for? Is it something you remembered, hoping it will alleviate your parents situation?”

Jessie sighed in resignation and tossed the blanket aside. She sat up and noticed that he was leaning against the small countertop while he sipped the instant cup of coffee that he’d made. She could now smell it and cringed, knowing it must taste like crap but better than what Kevin would have made at the office. She sat cross-legged on the couch, focusing back on the flames swaying in front of her. It was better than witnessing what his reaction was going to be.

“I think I know who my parents’ handler was and I need his information to track him down.” Jessie waited for Gavin to launch into a lecture about letting justice be served for the crimes committed, but when he remained silent she continued. “He’s the only one who has the contacts and resources to sneak my parents out of the country.”

Jessie could feel the air crackle around her as Gavin approached with light steps that astounded her. No man should be able to be that silent. She was also taken aback at how comfortable he appeared in the dark denim and matching shirt, but all those thoughts faded as he knelt down in front of her. His green eyes studied her, as if he were measuring her strength for what he was about to say.

“You know very well the pride I take in our country by the lengths I go to protect our freedom.” Gavin’s hand reached out and covered hers, causing Jessie to look down at their union. It was the first time he’d ever touched her in compassion and she was fascinated by the lines and faded scars on his hand that gave credence to his words. “Your parents began their journey by committing a great travesty against the United States and everything we stand for. That doesn’t mean I don’t understand their motivations. Time passed and their allegiance changed when they discovered the lies that they had been told and their lives became the cover story they had assumed many years ago. They are your parents and you love them. What you need to realize is that they love you also and if you end up in jail too, everything they risked to raise you in America to become the free thinking, independent, self-sufficient woman you are today is for naught.”

Jessie felt tears sting her eyes as she comprehended the sentiment behind his words. Her parents would feel what she was experiencing now and that made this situation that much worse. All of their hands were tied unless Gavin could come through with his promise. Feeling this helpless was overwhelming and the walls were closing in on her as she tried to breathe. A weight sat on her chest as she understood how much she owed Gavin for risking everything to help her and her family out. The ringing of a phone broke through her apprehension and her heart stuttered a beat as Gavin rose before her with an unusual troubled look on his face. This couldn’t be good.

“Get ready to leave,” Gavin instructed her as he walked over to his black bag only to pull out a nondescript burner phone. She’d seen enough of the pay as you go devices to know what they looked like—a totally non-traceable cash transaction. “Talk to me.”

Jessie felt like she was balancing on a precipice where even the slightest breeze would knock her off and she would plummet without a parachute or a prayer. Multiple scenarios ran through her mind regarding the various facets of what the call might mean. She hadn’t realized she was holding her breath until her unshed tears decided to slowly fall down her cheeks. She angrily wiped them away and stood up from the couch, awaiting whatever was coming her way.

“No one goes near him,” Gavin barked, turning into her former boss that expected his orders to be followed without question. “I’ll handle him when this is over.”

Just like that the call ended. Jessie waited impatiently for Gavin to destroy the burner phone and discard the separate pieces. She wanted to hear what had been relayed from the other end of the line, but she also knew how important it was to conceal their location should the same phone be used twice. He finally focused on her and the underlying fury that was lying beneath his crystal green eyes made her shiver in response to what he would do if the person it was directed to were ever in front of him.

“Daniel Signer.”

“Daniel?” Jessie asked, knowing Gavin was referring to one of the agents that she worked with. He was new to the field office but quite a charmer. “What about him?”

“He’s not FBI. He’s a CIA operations division field agent and he’s the one responsible for releasing the classified information that the FBI attributed to you as the source, resulting in you being targeted in the investigation for espionage.”

“What?” Jessie looked away from Gavin as she tried to remember the last couple of weeks. She couldn’t remember a moment in time when Daniel would have had access to her computer, but then again, the point was moot if he was CIA. He would have been able to access almost anything, including her personnel files. She took a step and before she knew it she was pacing in front of the fire. “This is good though. We can go back to the city and prove it was him and not me. Once we do that I can concentrate on finding Uncle John and—”

“We’re not doing anything of the sort.” Gavin picked up his coffee mug that he’d set next to his bag and walked back to the couch, sitting on the cushion closest to the door and then placing his left arm on the armrest. He observed her patiently over the rim of his cup as if he expected her to have a tantrum at his refusal to do what she wanted. Didn’t he realize yet that wasn’t in her nature? She’d just do what she wanted anyway, but she would listen to his reasoning behind his decision before she made hers. “If we tip off the CIA that we suspect Signer had anything to do with planting the evidence it blows everything I’ve worked for in obtaining your freedom. We’ll wait until the break of dawn to enter the city with the rush hour traffic. We’re not having this discussion again, Jessie. You either trust me to do what’s in your best interests or you don’t.”

“Why does that statement sound like it has more to do with us on a personal level than it does with—”

“It doesn’t get more personal than your freedom, Jessica.” Crest motioned toward the couch…where he was sitting. Jessie raised an eyebrow, not sure what he was suggesting and waited for him to clarify. “You need sleep. So lie down and close your eyes. I’ll wake you when it’s time for us to leave.”

Jessie hardly ever felt like she didn’t have a handle on something, but she wasn’t quite sure what he was asking her or how to accomplish what he wanted her to do. Did he want her head in his lap? Why would he want her to do that? It created images in her head that he might not want there quite yet. Did he want her feet to rest on his legs? If that was the case she was moderately talented with her—.

“Jessica.” The way Gavin said her name it was as if he knew what her answer would be come morning and he was just warming her up for what was to come. She was fine with that and she couldn’t wait to prove to him how wrong he was in regards to how she would respond to him. She wouldn’t second-guess her decision and she sure as hell could handle what he’d dished out. “Lie down. Now.”

Jessie couldn’t help but slowly close the distance between them, sit, and gradually lower herself to the couch. Gavin’s left arm was still leaning on the fabric and his right arm was now draped over the back with his coffee cup in hand. She shifted until the back of her head rested on his muscled thigh. She would have thought this would have helped her relax, but she was filled with tension and jumped slightly when he took his time covering her with the afghan.

“Close your eyes.” Gavin spoke in a low, rich tone that he’d never used at work and it had such a sensual, authoritative aspect to it that Jessie didn’t hesitate to do as he’d asked. She inhaled deeply and felt at war with her emotions over what was happening to them from outside sources and what they were experiencing personally. His directives made things easier and she finally felt the tension ease from her muscles. When his warm fingers brushed the hair away from her forehead, her eyes quickly opened. “If this is how well you listen…”

Jessie had to bite her lip to keep from smiling. Gavin hid this part of himself from others and she was pleased to know he had a lighter side. She was even more thrilled to know that he felt comfortable enough to share it with her. Her lashes drifted closed once more and visions of them together were the only thing she saw. As his touch never left her, she fell into a light sleep secure, in knowing he was watching over her and what the morning would bring.

Chapter Ten