Queen of Hearts (8 page)

He’d taken a seat and sat quietly, watching me carefully, almost in wonder while I spoke. As soon as the last word fell from my lips, he was up and out of his chair, thundering toward me. I stumbled backward, a little frightened of him and not knowing what to expect until my back was against the wall behind me.

“That’s why you came back?”

His voice was deadly calm, but his eyes told a tortured story. He was battling with his emotions, teetering on a decision to kiss me, or kill me. He stared hard for a beat, and then stepped back, turning and running his hand through his hair.

I held a hand over my chest to hold in the nerves, and when he faced me again, it was evident that the darker side of him had won out.

Pressing myself further into the wall, I shook my head and demanded he stay away from me. “I just want what I deserve.”

He chuckled and leaned against the wall, the palms of his hands heavy against the wall above my head. I could smell him, and saliva pooled in my mouth. There was no denying the attraction I had to him. Still. Always. But he was dangerous, and nothing good could come of letting him see that I was affected by him.

I could feel the strength and anger roll off of him and the smooth pads of his fingers against my skin like it was yesterday. I closed my eyes, blocking out the arousal and the feelings and just everything. He pushed his nose into the crook of my neck, pulling a long breath, scenting me. I was so close to losing it.

“I don’t want you to touch me.”

My voice sounded small, even to my own ears. The battle between body and mind was fierce, but I was resolved to keep him away. There were still too many unanswered questions, and he was unyielding with his answers.

His face moved closer. I could feel his breath and smell the sweet scent of liquor on his tongue.

“You won’t stop me,” he whispered.

He sounded so sure I wouldn’t, and the fact was, I wasn’t sure either. He rendered me completely stupid. I hated it, and I hated him.

“This isn’t happening. You need to back off.”

He chuckled. “And if I don’t?”

Pushing his hips forward, he ground his erection into my stomach, making his intent clear. He was hard and ready, and my body was already showing signs of giving in. It’d been that way from day one. I was at his mercy, no matter what. He was like a drug, and I was jonesing. Hard.

It’d been so long since I’d felt him. So damn long since I’d had his hands on me. I’d dreamed about him regularly, almost to the point of distraction. I was a lost cause.

“Janie, I can’t let you run again. Even if I have to lock you up. I won’t let it happen. I’ve waited too long for you to come home.”

Smug satisfaction coated his words, and I was more than done listening to his power trip.

“Maybe I’d be less resistant if you treated me like a human being. I’m not your ‘thing’ to keep, Flynn. I never was.”

He pulled back and brought both hands to my jaw, cupping it gently and drawing my face closer to his. “You’re wrong, Janie. You’re my everything.”

Those tender words danced around in my head, but I sobered quickly, remembering similar words and the lies that followed.

I was back in that orbit where nothing made sense, and a ball of confusion and mismatched emotions slammed right through me.

“You don’t even know me. I’m just some... some idea you have,” I stuttered.

His eyes scanned my face, and traces of a smile started forming on his lips.

“I know enough. I know you’re strong, you’re beautiful, you’re smart and you have a kind heart. You don’t show it often, but I saw it. I don’t know anyone—no woman, no man—that would have sacrificed what you did to save a father that didn’t deserve it.”

My chin quivered, and I could feel my eyes start to tear up. “I’m no savior. I’m not a martyr, Flynn.”

Shaking his head, he brought his lips closer. “No, you’re not. You’re my bent-halo angel. I love the bad in you as much as I love the good.”

There was something very wrong with him. That was the only conclusion I could come up with. I’d already figured out that he was a bit... off, strange, but that comment nailed it.

“You like my bad, too?”

“I love your bad. I want your bad.”

My eyes fell closed, and I felt the moisture fall down my cheeks. I was losing. “I don’t trust you. Nothing works without trust, Flynn. You can’t talk your way out of everything, and you can’t pay me to be with you. This will never work. It didn’t work in the first place. It was a lie.”

“I don’t trust you, either. It does work. It
did
work before you left without giving me a chance to explain. I trusted you then, and you bailed. I never lied about my feelings, Jayne. Ever.”

I’d had enough—we were like fucked up poster children for dysfunctional crime families. The orphans of Sin City. It was stupid.

I was getting nowhere with him, fast. He was a stubborn, spoiled brat. He was relentless until he got his way, and he wasn’t getting it, no matter how good he smelled or how pretty he looked.

Raising my hands, I pushed at his chest and moved around him. “I’m not who you think I am, Flynn, and you’re exactly who I thought you were in the first place. I should’ve stuck with my instincts with you. I knew you’d fuck me up, and you did. Badly.”

Shoving myself away from him, I darted out of reach and went over to grab my bag so I could leave before I ended up on my back with my legs over his shoulders. It was coming. It would happen. Five more minutes in that room with him, and he’d be fucking me six ways to Sunday. My body was humming for him, and my heart was pleading with me to give in. It was time to put my head in the game and get the fuck out.

He stormed out of the room, and I took that as my chance to escape. I ran to the door and had barely gotten it open when he was back, slamming it closed and pinning me against it.

“This is what you came for? Well, here you go.”

He shoved a stack of bills down the neck of my blouse, pressing it against my chest with the palm of his hands. His forehead was against mine, and his eyes were blazing with anger. “I would give you anything.
Everything.
You think I give a fuck about money? You think that pussy of yours is worth a million and a half dollars? You’ll get paid, lady. You need more? You know where to get it. Now, get out!”

He reached around and opened the door, grabbed my shoulder, and shoved me out before slamming it closed behind me.

I all but ran down the hallway, completely hurt and humiliated. Things had definitely turned out worse than I figured, and as badly as I wanted to feel regret for the things I’d said to incite that kind of behavior from him, I didn’t. There was no reason to lead him on. I was done. I couldn’t go back.

But it hurt. So damn bad.

R
unning and hiding was exhausting. Wanting closure was on the top of the list of things I wanted, but the confrontation with Flynn was anything but. Instead of walking in there and taking what I thought I wanted, I left more bruised and more confused than ever.

Once I hit the casino floor, I found a place to sit and catch my breath. My heart pounded furiously and my hands shook like I had tremors. I was falling apart all over again, and if I thought it hurt the day I left Las Vegas, it was nothing compared to what I was feeling in that moment. I was completely devastated.

As I composed myself, I took in the excitement that surrounded me. Vegas personified. Thrills and experiences and greed. In my short life, I hadn’t really tasted any of the joy most of the people around me felt. Not really.

That oblivious sparkle in their eyes, the eagerness to play, spoils of the game, all of it. Something about the way they tossed their money away so easily triggered something inside of me, a deep resentment that I’d harbored for way too long.

One of the things my time with Jackson taught me was that my father was sick. It was a problem, not a way of life. Realizing and admitting that hurt me. I’d let my disgust and anger steer me in the same damn direction, and I was no better.

Money stole my life away.

At that thought, I remembered the cash Flynn had so callously shoved into my blouse. With a shaky hand, I pulled it out and shoved it haphazardly into my bag, feeling the heaviness deep in my heart. It sure didn’t feel victorious now that I had it in my hands. It felt ugly and disgusting.

I had to get out of there, collect my bearings. My gut churned thinking about going to that motel alone again. I was miserable, angry, and hurt. But I couldn’t stay inside the Maguire for a second longer.

I hot-footed it across the gaming floor and was almost out when I heard my name being called. I spun around quickly, colliding with the chest of a man.

I looked up, surprised and little startled until I recognized him.

“Alonzo Davidson.” I smiled as he moved forward to hug me, and leaned in as his arms wrapped around me.

“I heard you’d left Vegas. Welcome back.”

With a kissy-kissy, I moved back and smiled wryly. “I did, a few years ago. I just came back.”

“Business or pleasure?” He raised his eyebrow mischievously, and I could clearly see the interest in his eyes.

It was tempting, almost like an instinctual reaction. Bile rose up in my throat as the ghosts of my past pointed and laughed at the disgusting way I’d led my life up to that point. I was vulnerable in that moment, but the painful words Flynn spat at me earlier slammed into me like a freight train.

“Neither, actually. My father passed away, so I came back to handle his affairs, and well, this has always been home, I guess.”

“I’m sorry about your father. I hadn’t heard.”

That didn’t surprise me. He still hadn’t been declared dead since there was no body. The thought turned my stomach. I’d done a good job of avoiding the situation, but I knew it was only a matter of time before I got my answer. No one could ever prepare for that sort of thing. I just wasn’t ready.

I shook my head. “Thank you. I appreciate that.”

He stepped closer, and as he did, I noticed Flynn standing a few feet behind him, glaring.

“Jayne, let me take you to dinner. Just to catch up. It’s been a very long time.”

I hesitated. Was I giving him the wrong impression? I had no desire to follow through on anything, but I didn’t want to be alone.

“Just dinner?”

He laughed, shaking his head. “Just dinner. I’ll be on my best behavior. A perfect gentleman.”

I didn’t believe that for a second. Alonzo had an insatiable sex drive and the stamina of a thoroughbred. I knew very well he’d do whatever he could to get into my pants.

I looked past him toward Flynn again, the pull too strong to ignore, and the pure, unbidden anger rolled off him like thunder. I’d be damned if I was going to let him intimidate me.

“That sounds perfect,” I said, smiling up at him. “A smart girl never turns down dinner with a handsome man.”

Alonzo’s smile beamed. I took his arm, and he led me through the casino toward the elevator that led to the steakhouse on the top floor. I was impressed—he was going all out.

Footsteps sounded from behind us, and then Flynn’s voice boomed through the corridor.

“Jayne!”

We both turned, and as he approached, Alonzo tightened his grip on me, obviously uneasy about the way Flynn was behaving.

“What are you doing?” he snapped.

I cleared my throat and looked him straight in the eye. “I’m busy. We said everything that needed to be said.”

He chuckled humorlessly. “Alonzo, if you’ll excuse us, we have some things to clear up. Alone.”

I looked back and forth between them. “You know him?” I asked Alonzo.

He shifted nervously, never taking his eyes off Flynn. “I’m his attorney.”

Shit.

“I see,” I said. With a sigh, I turned back to face Flynn.

“Flynn, I have nothing more to say. Alonzo is an old friend, and he’s offered to take me to dinner. I don’t want any trouble, and you’re causing a scene.”

“It’s
my
damn casino! Fuck a scene!”

“Maguire!” Alonzo snapped. He stepped forward, pushing me behind him. “You need to calm down. I don’t know what’s going on here, but I won’t allow you to treat her like that.”

Flynn scoffed, flicking his hand at him dismissively. “Yeah, but you won’t think twice about having her suck your dick, will you?”

I gasped. “You’re a bastard!”

“And you’re the bitch breaking my heart. We’re even, sweetheart.”

He turned to walk away, and then stopped and looked over his shoulder. “You don’t have to do this.”

A lump formed in my throat. I wanted to call out to him, to stop him and assure him that I wasn’t doing what he assumed I was, but the look on his face told me he had little faith that I was anything but a whore. Combined with his earlier words, I sunk deeper into desolation.

Once he was out of sight, Alonzo turned to me and rubbed his hands over my shoulders. “Are you okay?”

His eyes held both worry and pity. I didn’t want either. I was fine. At least, I would be. I didn’t want to think about it, and eating a meal with an old friend would help with that.

“I’m fine,” I insisted.

I could tell he wanted to ask more, but he let it drop, and I was grateful.

“Okay, if you’re sure.”

I managed to squeeze out a smile and answered. “I’m sure. Now feed me. I’m starving.”

The Skyline Steakhouse was one of the more elegant of its kind on the strip. We were seated in a nice, quiet corner surrounded by candles and soft music. The ambience lifted a bit of the tension from my shoulders, at least. It was calm and mellow, and exactly what I needed.

I ordered French onion soup, and it was divine. I hadn’t had it in ages, and it had always been my favorite. My mother used to make it with grilled cheese sandwiches on rainy days, so it was one of my go-to comfort foods. Besides, soup was pretty much all my stomach could stand at the moment.

At least the company was good. Alonzo had always been a charmer, a genuine one, so I felt myself relax for the first time in over a week.

“I had no idea you and Flynn had a thing,” he said.