Pure (34 page)

“What did you expect?” Lucian countered wearily. “He will defend what is his.”

I sent my stepfather a death glare. “I am not
his
. Would you please stop referring to me as a possession instead of a person?”

Lucian smiled. “Either way, Seth cannot be blamed for defending her. Or would you rather he’d allowed the Master to continue to beat Alexandria?”

“That is preposterous, Lucian!” Marcus’s hands balled into fists.

They went back and forth for a little while. Eventually my head ached as badly as my jaw did. On the positive side, Seth began to relax and no longer looked like he wanted to wipe out an entire village of pures. Once I’d gathered I wasn’t in
that
much trouble, I slipped out the double doors and breathed in the brisk air.

I didn’t roam off too far, staying just around the corner from the sitting room. I kept thinking about what the Master had said. My fate had already been sealed? Had the Master known something or had he just been taunting Seth?

“Alex?”

I turned to the sound of Aiden’s voice. His eyes were a flinty silver. “Hey,” I murmured. “I know I messed up again and—”

“I’m not here to yell at you, Alex. I just wanted to make sure you are okay.”

“Oh. Sorry. I’m just used to everyone yelling at me.”

He tipped his head to the side, eyes a dark gray. “I understand why you did what you did. Honestly, I wouldn’t have expected you to do anything differently.”

“Really?” I looked around skeptically. “Are you on drugs?”

Aiden smiled, but then his eyes flickered to my jaw. The smile faded. “Does it hurt?”

“No,” I lied.

He looked like he knew better. Before I knew what he was doing, he reached out and brushed his fingers around the edge of the bruise. “It’s swelling. Have you put ice on it?”

I had actually, but I’d grown bored holding the ice bag Seth had rifled together. Staring at Aiden now, though? I completely forgot what he’d just asked me. His fingers were still against my cheek and that was the only thing in this world that mattered.

“You still show so much strength.” A small smile appeared on his lips. Then he dropped his hand, the heady connection brief. “No other half-blood would have done what you did.”

“I don’t know why you keep saying that.” I leaned against the smooth wall as if it could somehow ground me back into reality.

“It’s the truth, Alex. And I’m not even talking about what you did for the half-blood. It’s what you just did in there. I know damn well what it took for you to apologize and say what you did. That took strength.”

“It wasn’t strength. I was scared out of my mind, actually. Maybe a little irrational, you know?”

Aiden glanced away, toward the labyrinth. From here, all I could see were the tips of the vine-covered statues. “I was wrong.”

My breath caught in my throat. “Wrong about what?”

He turned back to me, eyes silvery. “About a lot of things, but I always thought your irrational nature was a flaw. It’s not. It’s what makes you so strong.”

I stared at him, my heart doing all kinds of crazy things in my chest. “Thank… you.”

“Don’t thank—”

“I know.” I smiled even though it made my jaw hurt. “Don’t thank you for that, but I did.”

Aiden nodded. “I better get back in there. Don’t wander off too far, okay?”

I nodded and watched him turn around. He got to the French doors and stopped. Turning around, the expression on his face was unreadable, but his words were precise.

“Part of me wishes Seth had killed that Master for touching you.”

Dinner was served early on the night of the ball and the mad bustle of servants drove me up to my room. My nerves were stretched tight from my impending Court session, my run-in with a Master’s fist, Seth’s psycho akasha killing power, and Aiden’s parting words.

Part of me wishes Seth had killed that Master for touching you.

Two days later and I still couldn’t forget what he’d said.

That had been a serious statement, but what could it mean? Did it matter? No, I told myself. Even if Aiden loved me as much as I loved cake, it didn’t matter. There was no future there, only death and despair.

A soft knock on the door pulled me out of my thoughts. Since Seth never knocked, I knew it couldn’t be him. I scooted off the bed and went to the door.

Laadan stood in the hallway, dressed in a beautiful deep green dress that clung to her hips before billowing out around her in soft, wispy material. Her hair was done up in an intricate twist, adorned by several fresh rose blossoms.

I glanced down at my sweats and shirt. Gods, I never felt more boring and ugly in my entire life. And here I thought Lea was the only one who could evoke such feelings.

Laadan smiled faintly. “If you’re not busy, which I can tell you’re not, I want to show you something.”

I glanced back at my bed and shrugged. It wasn’t like I had anything to do. We passed several servants on the way to her room on the floor above, and Laadan smiled at each of them graciously.

Once inside her room, she circled one arm around my shoulders and steered me to an overstuffed chair by her closet. I sat down and pulled my legs up to my chest. “You… wanted to show me your closet door?”

Laadan’s laugh was throaty and infectious. I found myself smiling at her. “You’re so much like your mother.” She shook her head as she leaned against the doors. “The things you say—it’s like hearing Rachelle speak.”

My smile faded a bit and I wrapped my arms around my knees. “My mom never said half of the stupid stuff that comes out of my mouth.”

“You’d be surprised.” She paused as a soulful look crept across her features. “Do you know what your mother loved most about the Council sessions?”

“No.”

Laadan spun around and threw open her closet doors. She stepped back and spread her arms in a sweeping gesture. “All the dancing and beautiful dresses.”

Curious, I leaned forward to get a look inside the closet and nearly fell out of the chair. “Wow. That’s a lot of clothes.”

She gave a saucy grin over her shoulder. “A girl can never have too many clothes. Come on. Take a look.”

I pulled myself from the chair. The gowns caught my eye. Like being under a compulsion that’d turned me into a girlie girl in under two seconds flat, I stepped forward and ran a hand over the soft material.

“You like them?” She tugged on a deep purple dress in crushed velvet.

My fingers lingered on a red silk dress. I couldn’t see the cut of it, but the color was divine. “These are the kinds of dresses you’d give up your firstborn child for.”

She laughed, dropping the purple dress and gently unhooking the red one. She held it up between us. “Why are you so dead set against going to the ball?”

I shrugged, eyeing the sleeveless dress. It had scalloped edging around the bodice, a high waist, and a skirt cut to cling to the legs. “I don’t even know why I’d be invited since halfs aren’t.”

“But you are different.” She hung the dress on the closet door and smoothed out the silk. “Being an Apollyon sets you apart from the rest of your kind, Alex. Once you Awaken, I’ve been told that both you and Seth will even be able to attend Council sessions.”

I hadn’t known that, but I seriously doubted at eighteen I needed to be in that kind of position of power. Maturity didn’t happen overnight. My eyes and mind were fastened on
that
dress. “There’s not going to be anyone there I know. And no offense, but my idea of fun isn’t spending a night with a bunch of pures.”

“None taken.” Laadan pulled out the skirt. The hue of the red caught the light, casting a faint glimmer over the dress. “Seth will be there. So will Aiden.”

I looked at her sharply. “Why would I care if Aiden will be there? He’s a pure. Where else would he be tonight?”

Laadan smiled faintly. “Would you like to try it on?”

“No thank you.”

“Humor me, why don’t you? Your mom wore a dress like this once, and I only have a little while before I’m due downstairs.”

The yearning to try the dress on was a physical ache, but I shook my head. Laadan persisted until I found myself standing in front of a full-length mirror with the red silk dress on. She stood behind me, hands on my shoulders. “You look beautiful.”

The dress was stunning. It was made to fit me—or at least altered to do so. The silk hugged from my chest to my hips before gliding out around my thighs. I twisted to the side, grinning. The back looked just as good as the front. Red was definitely my color. For a moment, I let myself drift into a dream where Aiden actually saw me in something this elegant and sexy.

And what if Seth saw me in this? Even my dirtiest imagination couldn’t capture his response accurately.

“I should probably take this off before I ruin it.”

Laadan pulled me away from the mirror and sat me down in front of a small table full of makeup and other suspicious-looking things. I started to stand, but she planted her hands on my shoulders again. “Alex, there is no reason for you to stay in your room tonight while everyone else is enjoying the ball. So be still and let me do something with this hair of yours.”

“I don’t want to go.” I twisted around so I faced her.

She turned me back around and picked up a brush. “Why? Is it because you have your session tomorrow? Wouldn’t that be even more of a reason to relax and enjoy tonight?”

I frowned and tried to ignore the soothing way the brush moved through the tangles in my hair. “It’s not because of the session tomorrow. I just… don’t want to go.”

Ignoring me, she picked up a curling iron and started twisting long sections of hair around the barrel. I gave in to the primping pretty quickly, still having no real intention of going to the ball. It was nice to have someone make me pretty, even if all the hard work would be wasted on my pillow. Chattering on about my mother, she moved on to the makeup and when she was done, I barely recognized the smoky-eyed girl staring back at me.

Laadan had outdone herself.

She’d piled the curls atop of my head, but pulled several thick strands down to cover my neck and tease the bodice of the dress. The curls seemed strategically placed, as they hid the scars.

“What do you think?” she asked, a powder brush in her hand.

I had no idea what to say. The blush accented my cheekbones, making them appear higher than normal. She’d covered the bruise on my jaw without coating my face with makeup. The mascara and artfully applied shadow turned my eyes into the warmest chocolate instead of the dirt color they usually favored. Red stain plumped my lips in a way that begged to be kissed.

“Wow. My nose looks small.”

Laadan laughed, setting the brush down. “Wait. The only thing you are missing is…” Drifting off to a dresser and opening a large velvet box, she rooted around for a few moments and pulled out a silver chain with black stones surrounding a ruby.

The necklace probably was worth more than my life, but she dropped it around my neck and clasped it. “There! Now you’ll be the belle of the ball.”

I stared at myself, wanting a picture of this moment. I don’t think I’d ever look so… unlike me again. If Caleb could’ve seen this, I think he might’ve complimented me.

Laadan glanced at a clock gilded in gold. “And we’re finished just in time. The ball has only just begun, and you will make a fashionably late entrance.”

My gaze drifted down the mirror. “I can’t go.”

“You’re being silly. You’re going to look more beautiful than any pure-blood in that room, Alex. You’ll belong.”

I stood, shaking my head. “You don’t understand, Laadan. I do appreciate all of this and it was fun, but I… I can’t go.”

She frowned. “Perhaps I don’t understand. Would you explain it to me?”

Slowly, I turned back to the mirror. The girl staring back at me looked beautiful if no one looked
too
hard or
too
close. If anyone did, the picture of perfection would start to fall apart. There wasn’t a pretty dress in Laadan’s closet that could fix that.

“Alex?”

“Look at me,” I said quietly.” You don’t see… them? I can’t go down there and have everyone stare at me.”

Laadan’s concerned face appeared above my head in the mirror. “Honey, everyone will be staring at you because you look beautiful.”

“Everyone will be staring at my scars.”

She blinked and took a step back. “No. They’re not even—”

“I know they will be.” I turned around, fingering the delicate chain around my neck. “Because it’s what I notice first on someone. And look at my arms, they’re pretty gross.”

And they were. The skin had never quite returned to the original skin tone. They’d paled, like all daimon tags did, but the tiny teeth marks left behind were uneven and red, lining my forearms, starting right above my wrist and ending along the tender skin of the inside of my elbow. The skin was just as uneven and patchy as my neck, but at least the scars on my throat had faded into a shiny color a shade or two lighter than my normal complexion. The bit of cleavage the dress showed off took away from those scars, but my arms totally made up for it.