Protecting What's His (15 page)

Chapter Twenty

After a hot shower, Derek collapsed into bed around 7:00 a.m. His body felt sore from the overwhelming tension of the day and needed sleep to repair itself. Despite his exhaustion, he couldn’t deny the unfamiliar sense of contentment he felt. Last night, after buying Ginger a cup of coffee at the hospital to keep her awake, he’d given her his jacket and walked her to the parking lot. She’d refused to let him call her a cab, so he’d settled for her promise to text him when she arrived at home.

It came twenty minutes later:
Home sugar xo.

He’d caught Alvarez eyeing him funny in the waiting room and realized he was smiling like a kid on Christmas. Highly inappropriate behavior when a man lay wounded in the next room. Even if they knew for certain he would pull through. Sensing the room full of officers was dying to know more about the gorgeous, half-dressed girl who’d jumped him in the hallway, he’d silenced the first one brave enough to ask with a look that prevented any more questions.

Before she left the hospital, he’d extricated one more promise from her. When Willa left for school this morning, Derek wanted her to come over. He still planned on having their talk despite what took place last night. He’d clipped his spare keys back on her key ring so she wouldn’t have an excuse not to come.

Just before he let sleep overcome him, Derek recalled Ginger standing in the hospital, shaking from the cold in her nightshirt, crying because she’d thought him dead or dying. He’d never had anyone cry or worry over him before. Both of his parents were accountants living downstate who didn’t understand his chosen profession and distanced themselves from the chaos of it, of his life.

Women he’d dated in the past seemed to enjoy his dangerous job, even get off on it. Or they would venture in the opposite direction and suggest he quit
because
of the danger. Ginger would want him safe, but she would never ask him to change his lifestyle or give up the job he loved. Since meeting her, he’d been irrationally jealous, dominated her sexually, and provoked her at every turn. Yet, she’d run toward him and jumped straight in his arms this morning, wanting him flaws and all.

Derek hoped for her sake she didn’t try to change her mind, because he didn’t intend to let her go. He would fight every single insecurity swimming around in that beautiful head to keep her. Hell, he had insecurities, too. Could he make a woman like Ginger happy outside of bed? He’d spent thirty years remaining emotionally detached from the opposite sex, but if he was going to demand Ginger open up and trust him, he couldn’t keep her at a distance. Nor did he want to.

Despite the troubling details he’d discovered about her past, he still needed to learn so much about her. In addition to her loyalty to Willa, he knew her to be strong-willed and perceptive, funny and compassionate. She’d been ruthless about taking a different path than her mother, but still used her looks to make men hop when she needed something. A fact that set him on edge. He alone would see to her needs now.

He felt her slip into bed with him at eight thirty. Waiting to see what she would do, Derek kept his breathing even and remained still. The mattress barely moved under her slight weight, but he felt her lift the covers and scoot across the bed, closer to him. After a moment wherein he struggled against rolling over and pinning her, Ginger’s arm slid around his waist and she pressed herself against him.

Powerful relief moved through him. Derek realized he hadn’t fully expected her to feel the same way in the light of day. Knowing that she hadn’t changed her mind about giving them a chance calmed him immeasurably. He lay there, letting her feminine scent wrap around him, relishing his body’s response to having her in his bed.

“I know you’re awake,” she whispered against his ear, making him smile. “I shared a room with my sister for seventeen years. I know when someone’s being a big faker.

“Guilty. I think I’m afraid to turn around and see what you look like in my bed. The image will haunt me when I leave for work this afternoon.”

Her laugh sounded muffled among the pillows. “But if you don’t turn around, you won’t see the sexy lingerie I wore just for you.”

Derek flipped over with such speed, Ginger squealed and threw up her hands. Kneeling over her, he yanked down the covers and narrowed his eyes at her oversize sweatshirt and leggings. “Oh, you’ll pay for that.”

Her smile slipped a little. “I’ve just been so cold since last night. It’s like I can’t warm up.”

He’d been right to avoid looking at her. Seeing Ginger snuggled in his bed, so casually dressed with her hair fanning out onto his pillow, Derek’s heart wedged itself in his throat. She had to be the most goddamn beautiful thing on the planet, even sleep-deprived as she appeared.

“Come here. Let’s get you warm.”

He lay back down alongside Ginger, sliding an arm underneath her so she could rest her head on his shoulder. She hesitated only a moment before tucking her head under his chin and cuddling into the warmth of his bare chest.

“Is the wounded officer okay?”

“Yes, moved out of ICU around four-thirty this morning.”

“Good.” She blew out a breath. “I guess I made kind of a scene.”

Derek sighed. “I don’t think any of them particularly minded the interruption. While we’re on the subject, could you try and pay a little closer attention to your attire in public? I’d barely recovered from those firemen seeing you in that wet T-shirt the night your apartment flooded. Now the entire homicide division knows what you wear to bed.”

“Actually, I don’t wear anything to bed. I fell asleep last night before I could get undressed.” Ginger laughed when Derek groaned, pulling tighter against him. “How can you be so jealous of other men, Derek, when you know there’s only been you?”

“Baby, I’m jealous of men who haven’t even seen you yet.”

She smirked. “I could tell you there’s nothing to worry about, but I think I’d be wasting my breath.”

“Tell me anyway.”

Leaning up to kiss his lips gently, Ginger obeyed, whispered the reassurance to him twice. When she tried to deepen the kiss, Derek pulled back.

“Don’t try to distract me. We have too much to discuss. Including why you were so dressed up yesterday afternoon.”

Ginger flopped back onto the pillow. “Oh, that.” He held on to his impatience while she fidgeted with the bedspread nervously. “I had lunch with a man who owns a furniture store in Wicker Park. I bought some antique chairs there last week and we got to talking about my designs. He asked to see pictures, so we met for lunch and I showed him some.”

“And?”

“And he wants to sell them in his shop.”

She still wouldn’t look at him, so he grasped her chin and turned her until their eyes met. “Ginger, that’s great. You weren’t going to say anything?”

“Not unless they sold.”

“They’ll sell,” he said with confidence.

“Well, let’s hope so. I called Sensation yesterday and quit.”

He tried to keep the sweeping relief from his face. “You’re full of surprises this morning. Is there a particular reason?”

She ran the arch of her foot along his calf. “Besides my boyfriend showing up and raising hell? Dragging me out in the middle of my shift?”

“Say that again.”

“Which part?”

“The part where you call me your boyfriend with that accent that makes me crazy.”

“I’ll say it again if you kiss me.”

He smiled and shook his head. “All in good time, sweetheart.”

“If you insist,” she sighed. “But if this is going to be a long conversation, I’m going to get comfortable.”

She grabbed the hem of her sweatshirt and peeled it over her head to reveal a cropped pink tank top that bared just a hint of her smooth stomach. Then she stretched out like a cat right in front of him.

Derek’s fingers dug into the comforter to prevent himself from reaching for her. He’d sworn to himself they would talk this morning. Ginger counted on sex as a means to distract him. And, God, watching her slide around on his sheets, he came damn close to forgetting his resolve. But if he gave in every time, they would never move forward. She probably didn’t even realize the extent to which she used her sensuality to avoid having difficult conversations.

Last night had been a turning point, but despite the progress they’d made at the hospital, he’d need to walk a fine line with Ginger. He needed her trust.

Derek dragged his gaze away from her body. “Tell me why you really quit.”

Her eyes shot to his in surprise, then glanced away. “Honestly? I’d called security ten minutes earlier about that guy who grabbed me. They didn’t take me seriously. If you hadn’t shown up…” she trailed off, oblivious to his mounting anger. “You don’t know a lot about where I came from. I worked in a place called Bobby’s Hideaway for four years before I left Nashville. The kind of thing you saw that night happened frequently there. When I left Nashville, I left that behind. I don’t want to feel unsafe at my job anymore.”

Fury gripped him by the neck. For the girl she’d been and the woman she’d become. He’d die before he let her go through anything resembling her past life again.

His voice shook. “You don’t ever have to feel unsafe again. I won’t allow it.”

Apprehension clouded her features. “I made a decision on the drive home last night from the hospital. If we’re really going to try this…”

“We are.”

Her eyes squeezed shut. “Then there are some things I want you to know about me first. Things you deserve to know.”

Chapter Twenty-One

Ginger’s heart pounded. She was actually going to tell Derek about the money she’d stolen. Everything that happened next between them would depend on his reaction. She didn’t harbor any fears that he would arrest her or demand she return the cash to Valerie. She could rest easy on that score. But one thing she’d learned about Derek? He took his job as a law officer very seriously. How would he feel about having a thief in his bed?

If anyone had told her a week ago she would be considering a relationship, with a
cop
no less, she would have laughed and called that person a filthy liar. Well, here she was. And she’d be damned if she’d waste her time pretending to be someone else. He would accept the worst of her or nothing at all.

Maybe she’d shed a little bit of her former self this week by quitting Sensation and taking a meeting with an actual businessman about her furniture. But she would never completely shed the girl from Nashville who’d once flashed her breasts at a hardware store owner in exchange for him installing a deadbolt on her and Willa’s bedroom door.
That
Ginger had worked with what the good Lord gave her, and she would never be ashamed of her actions.

Only one question remained. Would Derek be ashamed of her?

“Willa and I didn’t have the best of upbringings,” she started, hating her voice for shaking. “Our mother, Valerie, she had me young and…she wasn’t quite ready for a kid. And by the time Willa came along, she still wasn’t ready.” She took a deep breath. “I’ve had to do things maybe some people wouldn’t approve of to keep us clothed and fed—”

“Ginger, I know.”

Her expression went from anxious to confused. “You know what exactly?”

Derek released a breath and placed a hand on her arm, like maybe he thought once he explained, she would make a run for it. Unease spread through her.

“Please try not to get upset.”

She didn’t say anything.

He sighed. “I ran a search of your name on the national database. There was a missing persons report filed for you and Willa, by your mother, three weeks ago.”

Ginger couldn’t get air into her lungs. She lurched up in the bed, hand clutching her chest, vaguely sensing the alarm in Derek’s voice. Valerie had gone to the police and reported them missing. That could only mean one of two things. Their mother had suddenly decided she gave a damn—highly unlikely considering the condition she’d been in when Ginger last saw her—or something was very wrong. Her mother didn’t associate with cops unless they were in the process of arresting her. If she’d walked into a police station without handcuffs on her wrists, there must be a damn good reason.

The money
. Ginger never really stopped to ponder where it might have come from. Derek said Valerie filed a missing persons report, but hadn’t mentioned the theft. Which meant Valerie needed to find Ginger to get the money back.

But she would never involve the cops unless her circumstances were dire. Life or death. Either it hadn’t been her money to begin with and she’d been holding it for someone who now needed it back. Or she’d borrowed the cash and her debt was coming due.

How could Ginger not have seen this coming? Besides the police, who else was looking for them? And how could Derek have brought her into a room full of cops knowing about the missing persons report?

Ginger threw her legs over the side of the bed, intending to go pick up Willa from school. She couldn’t think beyond that. She just knew she didn’t want her little sister out there alone.

Derek pushed her back down onto the bed, looming above her.

“Get off me!”

“Jesus, will you just
listen
to me?”

She fought him, but his hips pinned her to the bed. “No. Let me up!”

“I took care of it! Ginger, I took care of it.”

Her body went still underneath him. “What does that mean?”

“It
means
no one will be looking for you in Chicago. There’s no way to delete the report, but I found a way to hide it. When I said you didn’t have to feel unsafe anymore, I meant it.” His eyes searched wildly around the room. “Dammit, Ginger. Where the hell were you going? Were you going to leave me? Leave town?”

Relief warred with the adrenaline still pulsing through her. “I don’t know. I don’t know! What was I supposed to do? Every cop at that event, the ones in the hospital…they’ve all seen me, know my name. Willa is a minor. What I did is considered kidnapping.”

“Don’t ever try to leave without hearing me out first, okay?”

The panic on Derek’s face broke through her racing thoughts. Whether or not she approved of his checking into her background, ultimately he’d compromised himself for her. Should she be grateful or furious? She didn’t know. Nothing seemed clear anymore. But she needed time to figure it out. Her plan to tell Derek about the stolen money could wait for another day.

“So you know my mother’s name now. You must have seen her rap sheet.”

“Yes,” he confirmed in a hushed voice.

“I guess you know all about me then. I had this big confession ready and you already knew.”

“There’s nothing in your past that could keep me away from you.” Derek’s voice radiated sincerity. “You can tell me anything.”

Ginger struggled against the tears gathering behind her eyes. Derek scrutinized her expression, as if he knew she held something back, but he didn’t press.

The barrier she’d erected between them had never truly existed. While she’d been pretending to be carefree, no-strings-attached Ginger, he’d known about the past weighing her down. It made her angry. It made her want to blot out the knowledge she saw in his eyes.

Ginger became aware of their position on the bed, his body wedged between her parted thighs. His obvious arousal told her he hadn’t remained unaffected. Ginger’s arms were pinned over her head, bringing their chests and stomachs flush. She could see the battle taking place on his face. Sympathy warred with his need for her.

“Don’t look at me like that,” she snapped.

“Like what?”

“Like you feel sorry for me.”

“How do you want me to look at you, Ginger?”

She locked her ankles behind his back, watched him shudder. “Look at me like you did last night.”

With a loud groan of surrender, she felt the remaining anxiety in his body melt away, replaced by a different kind of tension. Derek rocked against her, claiming her mouth and biting at her lips until she offered her tongue. Liquid heat poured through her, spreading and warming everything in its path. Within seconds, her body craved him to the point of pain.

Ginger tugged her hands from his grip above her head. When they broke for air, she ripped her shirt off over her head and watched his eyes go dark as she molded her own breasts in her palms, tugging her nipples between her thumb and finger.

“Oh, baby, yes. Play with your tits for me. Show me where you want my mouth.”

Her thumbs caressed circles around her nipples. “Here, Derek.”

A heartbeat later, his mouth descended onto her breast, flicking the pink bud with his tongue before drawing the tightened tip into his mouth. Ginger’s head tossed on the pillow as he went back and forth between her breasts, rolling the stiff peaks in circles under his palms, blowing against them softly and grazing them with his teeth until she cried out for him to stop.

He raised his head, dark green eyes still riveted on her reddened, glistening nipples. “Where do you want me next, Ginger?”

The deep resonance of his voice washed over her, making her body tremble. Bravely, she took one hand and trailed it down her bare stomach, watching his diligent mouth follow in its wake, kissing and nipping at the sensitive skin of her belly. Finally, her fingers dipped below the waistband of her leggings, signaling where she wanted him to go. He caught her hand before it went too far, biting her sensitive palm in reproof.

“You like my tongue between your thighs, don’t you, sweetheart?” He hooked his thumbs into her waistband and slowly began sliding the leggings down her legs, along with her black thong. Ginger’s hips writhed in response to his question. “Yes, I know you do. I still have the nail marks on my shoulders from last time to prove it.”

Derek knelt at the end of the bed and slid his big hands underneath her ass. He gripped her tightly, urging her legs over his shoulders. Ginger’s body quaked in anticipation of his mouth finding her most sensitive place. She reached above her head and curled her fingers around the headboard for leverage.

Derek took his time looking her over before nipping at her inner thigh.

“Please, Derek,” she whimpered.

He smiled wickedly. “Can I tell you a dirty secret?”

“Yes,” she gasped. “Just hurry.”

Derek’s dark laughter increased her arousal, coating her in slick heat. Achingly slow, he sunk two thick fingers inside her. “If I could go back and do one thing differently that first night, I would taste your virgin pussy before I fucked you. I bet it would have been extra sweet.”

Ginger climaxed. Her scream resonated through the room, ending in disjointed pants and moans as Derek prolonged the pleasure with his fingers. Arching away from the bed, she rotated her hips against his hand, never wanting the rippling spasms to end.

When she finally opened her eyes, Ginger sought his face and found him watching her with reverence. “God, you’re incredible.” Then his mouth found her core once more, licking the sensitive flesh with long, torturous strokes of his tongue, focusing on and exploiting the bundle of nerves begging for attention. Digging her fingers into his broad shoulders, she hurtled toward a second peak.

Derek growled as she came again, this time against his mouth. Ginger heard the now-familiar sound of him ripping open a condom wrapper with his teeth.

“I take it back. Nothing could taste sweeter than that.”

He jerked her hips up to rest on his thighs, pushed her legs wide, and filled her with his erection. As vulnerable and exposed as the position left her, Ginger had no choice but to match his demanding rhythm.

She needed his full weight on top of her, though, pressing her down into the mattress. She wanted to feel mastered, overcome. “I need you on top of me now. Please. I need…you to hold me down.”

His sharp eyes focused on her. “Baby, do you know what hearing that does to me?”

Following her down onto the bed, he pinned her soft body with his harder one, without sacrificing one precious movement of his body inside hers. Ginger sobbed at the perfection of it.

“Tighten those pretty thighs around my waist. I’m going to give it to you rough.” She obeyed. Holding her arms near the headboard, immobilizing her, Derek pounded into her. The sound of damp, slapping flesh and the metal headboard bumping against the wall echoed through the room, mingling with Ginger’s cries and Derek’s sharp expletives. “Is this how you wanted it, beautiful girl?”

“Oh God, yes. Harder, Derek.”

She didn’t think it possible, but he complied with her plea, pushing the headboard against the wall with even greater force. Ginger felt her body reaching for another orgasm and raced to meet it. Her wrists ached from being held in his punishing grip, but the pain of restraint only heightened her experience. She tugged on the unyielding hands holding her hostage and felt the dizzying heat move through her lower abdomen when she couldn’t get free.

“Derek!”

“I’m here, baby.”

The orgasm shook through Ginger. Derek thrust deep and ground his pelvis against her. Her insides quaked while her body remained completely restricted, unable to move. Ironically, she’d never felt freer in her life. The room dimmed and spun around her as she tried to hold on to the sensation, to memorize it.

Ginger knew eventually she’d have to question why being restrained fulfilled her and how Derek sensed it and indulged her needs so perfectly, but right now she could only focus on keeping her legs locked around Derek’s back as drove into her one final time and peaked.

“Ginger. Baby.
Ginger!
”

His grasp loosened as he climaxed, and she used the freedom to grab his ass and pull him deep. Sinking his teeth into her shoulder, he groaned. Ginger wrapped her arms around him when he finally collapsed, placing kisses along his collarbone and neck.

Rolling onto his side a while later, Derek pulled her hard against his chest. He didn’t speak, instead seeming content to watch her. One hand stroked her hair, separating the sweaty strands from her neck and face.

His continued silence began to unnerve her. Derek had called all the shots every time they’d been together. Maybe she’d made him uncomfortable, asking him to hold her down?

She kept her head on his chest, mortified over her brazenness. “I’m sorry.”

The hand stroking her hair stilled, and she held her breath. “Why?”

“You’re so quiet.” She paused to gather her courage. “I figured what I asked you to do…was it… not normal? Or wrong?”

She squeaked as Derek flipped her over onto her back. When she looked up into his face, it was covered in disbelief. “Ginger, you listen to me very carefully.
Nothing
we do together is wrong.
Ever
.” He shook his head. “If I’m quiet it’s because I’m trying to figure out a way to never leave this bed again. That was—”

She didn’t let him finish. Relief roared through her, and with a laugh, she sat up, threw her arms around his neck, and hugged him. At first, Derek seemed stunned by her action. But his arms slowly banded around her waist and held her so tight she struggled to breathe.

“You have no idea how happy hearing that makes me, Lieutenant.”

His laugh rumbled against her ear. Without breaking their embrace, he pulled her back down onto the bed, tucking her head into his neck. “Me, too. Sleep, now, beautiful girl. I don’t have to be at work for a few hours.”

Ginger snuggled in close. Within minutes, she started drifting off, lulled by the fingers stroking up and down her spine.