Protect Me (30 page)

“Where’s the spare key to get into Lia’s apartment?” I thunder at my sister.
 

“Nate? What’s wrong?” she asks, instantly on alert.
 

“I need into her apartment. Now. Don’t mess with me, Avery.”
 

“Nate, calm down. Is Lia alright?” she urges.
 

“I don’t know. She left a fucking Dear John letter on my counter this morning,” I say. My breathing is labored as my nostrils flare in some crazy Hulk moment. My emotions have completely gotten the best of me.
 

“Nate, you have to calm down. Do you have the key for the bakery with you?” she asks.
 

“Yes,” I answer, running back down the stairs to retrieve the keys still in the ignition of the Mustang.
 

“Go into the office in the bakery. Top center desk drawer is a small key ring with a few keys. The one marked with an A is the spare to the apartment. Mom has always left it at the bakery in case the tenant locks themselves out,” Avery says in a calm voice.
 

“I’m sorry for yelling at you, Ave, I’m just…I’m just losing my damn mind right now,” I say as I let myself into the bakery.
 

“Don’t go in there yet, Nate. Take a few minutes to calm down before you go in or she’ll never listen to you. Do you hear me?”
 

“Yeah, I gotcha,” I reply.
 

“I love you, Nate.”
 

“Love you, too,” I tell my baby sister. I find the key ring right away and single out the key marked with the A. Before I head back out, I take a few deep, calming breaths. I’m known for being able to remain cool and collected under pressure, but this has me completely losing my shit. She can’t be gone.
 

I slowly make my way up the stairs. I knock one more time before placing the key in the knob. When Lia doesn’t answer, I let myself inside the apartment.
 

“Lia,” I call out, taking in the small apartment.
 

Most of the furnishings were here when Lia rented the place - all used pieces from my parents’ house over the years. There are still a few personal items lying around. Dishes are still in the sink untouched. I walk into her bedroom and notice how empty it feels. There’s a little bit of clothes hanging in the closet, but the majority is gone. I pull open the drawers and notice they’re practically empty. What little bit of items are left are strewn around like she just grabbed and took what she could.
 

I look around the room again and notice the white lace underwear sitting on the bed. I sit down and grab a hold of the delicate material. I grip the satin and lace tightly in my hand as I scan the room one last time. It smells like Lia, but her presence is gone. She’s fucking gone.
 

I give the apartment one last look over and
finally make my way to the door. I lock the door behind me as I step out into the bright September sun. It’s going to be a beautiful day for the day before Labor Day, and all I can think about is how much today blows. Today is the worst day ever.
 

I’m heading down the stairs when I notice a guy walking towards me.
 

“Can I help you?” I ask curtly as the guy approaches.
 

He’s tall, but not nearly as tall as I am. He’s a tad on the skinny side, has blond hair and eyes hidden behind a pair of dark aviator sunglasses.
 

“I was just looking for a friend,” he says, looking around the alley.
 

“Who’s that?” I ask, not wanting to deal with this man’s brand of asshole.
 

“Lia Walker,” he replies.
 

My antennas go up and I’m instantly on alert. Who is this guy?
 

“Lia’s not here,” I tell him, watching and gauging his reaction. I did notice he used her current name and not her birth name. That tells me he’s someone who has known her since she left Garrett. “Who are you?” I ask, my gut churning as I wait for his answer.
 

“I’m a friend from Memphis. She left a few weeks back and mentioned she might be heading this way,” the guy says.
 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t catch your name. I’m Nate,” I say as I step forward, extending my hand.
 

“Joe,” he replies, shaking firmly. “Lia and I were seeing each other before she up and left in the middle of the night. I’ve been looking for her for a month or so now,” he replies, dropping his gaze to the ground and kicking a rock with his boot.
 

Well, if that doesn’t sound all too familiar. Damn, am I gullible as shit. I fell for whatever line of BS she was shelling out. Just like this douche bag. Fan-fucking-tastic.
 

“Well, she’s not here anymore. She left for places unknown,” I tell the sap.
 

“Huh, okay. Well, thank you,” he says before turning and heading back the way he came.
 

I slip inside the Mustang and slam my fist into the dash, breaking the hard plastic and sending pain shooting through my arm. Shit! I can’t believe I was duped by her. I can’t believe I bought her crap. And worst of all, I can’t believe I love her enough that I would forget every other reason I should be upset right now, if I could just hold her in my arms one more time.
 

I drive back to my empty house on autopilot. I have no clue how I got here as I throw the car into park and step out. I look around one more time before heading inside my place. My place that I thought would be filled with Lia. Lia’s clothes. Lia’s girly shit on the bathroom sink. Lia’s favorite pickles on the top shelf
next to her favorite light beer.
 

I grab the remote and turn on the television. It turns on to some sporting event, but the hell if I know what it is. I can’t concentrate enough to even know what sport I’m watching.
 

My phone rings a few minutes later. Avery.
 

“Hello?” I say into the phone after contemplating for a few rings on whether or not I should answer it.
 

“Hey, did you find her?”
 

“No. She’s gone,” I say out loud, letting the words finally sink in.
 

“Gone? Like gone to pick up donuts?” she asks, hopefully.
 

“No, Avery. Like never fucking coming back, gone.”
 

“Why?” she whispers.
 

“I have no clue. She left a note while I was sleeping and now she’s gone, okay?”
 

“I don’t understand,” Avery starts saying.
 

“Ave, I really don’t feel like hashing this out right now, okay? I need some time to process.”
 

“You’re going to Mom’s later for supper, though, right?”
 

“I don’t know. I’ll let you know.” I don’t even let her say goodbye as I click off the phone. Yes, I realize I’m being a complete douche to my little sister, but my mind can’t even comprehend the amount of shit that’s spinning around in my brain. Of all the questions I have,
the one that keeps coming to the forefront is…Why? I need to know why.
 

The rest of the day continues on without me. I move off of the couch only to piss or to grab a new bottle of beer from the fridge. Otherwise, I hold vigil on my spot on the worn couch. Whatever game was playing on TV moves to the next game, and then to the next. The world continues around me as I stare off into space, lost in my own mind. Hell. That’s where I am.
 

A knock sounds on the door and I choose to ignore it. The knock is insistent though, and eventually I decide to deal with it so the person will just go away. I open the front door to see my mom standing there, concern written all over her pretty face. She’s also holding a bag of delicious smelling food.
 

“Are you going to invite me in?” she asks with a small smile. I back away from the doorway and allow my mom to enter the living room. “You missed dinner,” she says, walking into the kitchen and grabbing a plate from the cabinet.
 

“Yeah, sorry, Mom. I’m not feeling the best,” I tell her as she places food on the plate. My stomach growls loudly as I glance at the clock on the microwave. How in the hell did it get to be nine-thirty?
 

“I’ve heard,” she says as she walks over to my table, giving me no choice but to follow.
 

“What did you hear?” I ask as I sit at the place she’s set for me. She grabs a fork from the drying rack,
and two bottles of water from the fridge, and sits across from me.
 

I try to ignore the food sitting in front of me, but the aroma is killing me. Just the thought of food has made me want to hurl today, but the minute my mom comes in with a plate of something, I’m now suddenly hungry. Traitorous stomach.
 

“Avery told me about your phone calls this morning. How are you?”
 

“I’m fine, Mom,” I reply as I take a big bite of chicken fried steak dipped in mashed potatoes and gravy.
 

“You don’t look fine, Nathan. You look sad.”
 

“Well, my girlfriend just fucking left me, Mom.” Instantly, I regret my tone and the use of foul language. My mom has never stood for it, but she doesn’t correct me this time. “Sorry,” I say, defeated.
 

“It’s okay, Nate. When you are upset and hurting, you lash out in defense. Even at the ones you love the most,” she says with a caring look.
 

I take a few more bites of food while Mom sits there watching me.
 

“Tell me about Lia,” she says.
 

I look up, eyebrows shooting straight to my hairline. “You want me to tell you about Lia? Don’t you know her?”
 

“Yes, I know her. I want to hear it from you,” she says softly.
 

I take a deep breath and push the plate away. The food in my stomach churns uncomfortably, and I just pray it isn’t about to make a return appearance. “Lia’s had a rough life, Mom. She was born to an unwed teen mother who didn’t want her. Her mom left her with her grandfather who definitely didn’t want her. In college, she met some asshole who liked to get rough with her,” I tell my mom. It’s hard to say the words out loud. My chest tightens and my anger starts to return just by saying those words out loud.
 

“They dated for about a year before he started to hit her. She stayed for another three years before she was finally able to escape that hellhole. She’s moved from place to place for close to a year, moving around under a new name so he can’t track her down. She has no home, no roots. She lives in constant fear. She looks over her shoulder everywhere she goes.
 

“I want to find the guy, Mom. I want to find him and kill him with my bare hands. I want it to be painful and slow. I want him to beg for his life before I take it away from him. And you know what scares me more than the thought of murdering some asshole in cold blood, Mom? The fact that I would do it in a heartbeat if it meant freedom for her. I would spend the rest of my life behind bars to ensure she never has to look over her shoulders, not one more time. I’d do it all for her,” I say, all but whispering the last part.
 

“It’s easy to defend the honor of those you love
the most, Nate. And you do love her, right?”
 

“With everything I have,” I confess to my mom.
 

She smiles that all-knowing, motherly smile. “Nate, do you really believe the words she left you in that note?”
 

“What?” I ask, confused.
 

“Do you really believe that Lia doesn’t love you in return?”
 

“I don’t know, Mom. It’s hard to believe that everything she said and did, everything I felt with her, was all a lie.”
 

“Then don’t believe it. She’s running scared, Nate. Something has scared her enough to make her run again. Just like before.” She gives me a knowing head nod as all the pieces start to fall into place.
 

The strange feeling she had about someone being in her apartment. The creepy underwear that showed up on her doorstep. The guy in the alley.
 

I saw the truth in her eyes last night. She loves me. I know she does.
 

I push myself back from the table so fast, the chair falls backwards and lands with a thud on the floor. “She loves me,” I say to myself.
 

Mom stands up and smiles. “She does.”
 

“Where is she, Mom? Where would she go?” I ask, beg.
 

“I don’t know. If she’s not here and she’s not at her apartment, where else could she be? There’s no bus
in town so either she had a ride to St. Charles or she’s still here around town somewhere.”
 

“She doesn’t have a car. It’s still at the apartment,” I add as I slip my feet into my worn running shoes.
 

And then it hits me. The only place she would feel safe. The one place I told her she could go to if she was ever afraid. I know where my girl is.
 

“I know where she’s at,” I holler at my mom as I fly out the door and head towards my car. I dig my keys out of my pocket with one hand and grab my cell phone in the other.
 

“Be careful,” my mom hollers from the doorway as I slide into the car. The air is hot and stagnant inside, from the heat, but I don’t give a shit. I barely open the window as I peel out of my driveway for the second time today.
 

I grab my phone and hit speed dial number one.
 

“Yeah?” my older brother says in way of greeting.
 

“I know where she is and she’s in trouble,” I say as quickly as I can as I fly down Main Street, heading towards the edge of town.
 

“Lia? Where is she?” Jake asks urgently in the phone. Jake knows me well enough to know to stay away when I don’t want to be bothered. That’s why he hasn’t broken down my door or blown up my phone the way others in the family have tried today.