Proper Secrets (38 page)

“I won’t go back on our oath,” growled Peter, going frown for frown with Emily.

“But you’ll go back on your blood?
 
With the exception of thinking you dead, you have never hurt me as much as you did last night.
 
You have continued to choose his wishes over mine, and I will not have it any longer.”
 
Emily, despite her feminine stature, was more frightening than her brother when angered.
 
Bridget and Genevieve wisely did not intervene.

“My table has become a battleground!
 
What did you do to cause such ire, Peter?” said Lord Worthing.

“He refused to leave Reddester though I implored him with all of our blood ties.
 
I had to set off on foot by myself until Mr. Annesley kindly treated me as one should treat a sister,” said Emily.
 
Their voices rose above courtesy, but no one could say anything against Emily’s reasons.
 
For all she had done, as a sister and mother, Emily deserved Peter’s respect.

“Why are you so angry?
 
The Captain risked himself against Jude, so that we could all be done with this business,” said Peter.

“How do you think the loved ones of martyrs feel?
 
Do you think they rejoice in death because it brings good fortune for everyone else?
 
The only reason you are all at peace this
 
morning is because Jude Annesley has poor aim.
 
I am not so overjoyed with that stupid man you call your Captain, and before it all turned out well, neither were you,” said Emily.
 
Peter slammed his hands on the table.

“I am not pleased that he could have sacrificed his life, but I do respect it.
 
He did it for his sister.
 
That is something I can only admire.
 
Believe me, I would take a gamble like that for you.”
 
Peter stared her down until Emily sniffed at oncoming tears.
 
“Please, I didn’t mean to hurt you…
 
I saw last night differently.”

“You’re both so stupid,” mumbled Emily, taking her seat and shoving her palms at her eyes.

“I love you, too, dear sister.
 
All of my sisters.
 
I look forward to starting anew, now that all has been taken care of.
 
Which reminds me, I promised the Captain that I would bring everyone to Reddester today.
 
He wants to personally apologize, but is under strict orders not to travel,” said Peter.

Emily shook her head violently, but Lord Worthing said, “It is only right.
 
It will be the first time we’ve met with no addendums or hidden agendas.”

“Pardon, but I am exempt from this happy meeting of friends.
 
Since the Wingraves have come to Tripton, I’ve had my feelings dismissed and ignored by nearly everyone.
 
Today, I refuse,” said Emily, rising from the table.
 

“Emily…” said Peter.
 
She waited for him to go on.
 
He sighed.
 
“See that you eat a good dinner.
 
You’re looking pale.”

The rest of the Worthings were dressed and gone before noon.

“Em… be sure you do not ignore your feelings most of all,” Bridget had said as she stepped out the door.
 
Emily raised her brow, but said nothing.

Emily settled into a favorite library chair, and before opening the day’s book, rested her head with her eyes closed.
 
Then, she faced the truth, the real truth that she had wanted all along.
 
Elijah Wingrave loved her enough to put the Worthing family above all else.
 
He could have, at Fort Jennings, told her the rest, but he’d refused to expose her parents and Genevieve to ridicule.
 
Capt. Wingrave had begged her to leave it be, and even when Emily insulted him he did not sacrifice others to save himself.

Emily hated that she loved him, her petulance still a voice though her hope began to blossom.
 
What stood in their way now, but her own prideful resistance?
 
The answer far from effortlessly admitted, Emily got up to search for her outing clothes.

“Excuse me, my Lord, but your carriage driver asked me to inform you he saw Miss Worthing headed for the garden,” said the housekeeper, curtsying out of the room.
 
As one, the room looked to Capt. Wingrave.
 
He thought, smiled, then excused himself.
 
It was a run of bad luck for Bridget and Lady Worthing for they could not rightly spy from the window without appearing rude.

“Miss Worthing?”
 
She waited for him near the old rose bush at the back wall.
 
Clear of overgrowth, some of the buds had already bloomed crimson.

“How is your shoulder, Captain?” asked Emily.
 
She reasoned that it could not have been too horrible; no sling had been affixed to his person.
 
Indeed, he looked unchanged except for a slight bump where bandages pushed his sleeve out.

“’Twas a light grazing.
 
The doctor worries more about infection than the actual wound.
 
Did you walk here?”
 
Unburdened by any secrets or restraints, Elijah found he could not take another step.
 
Nothing was left but to take her in his arms and yet he was afraid.
 
Unreadable eyes and an expression lost in thought gave no hints as to Emily’s feelings.
 
He swallowed and tried to remember what she’d said the day before.

“I did.
 
It gave me much needed retrospection.”
 
Emily watched his uncertainty mellow into humor.

“You told me yesterday that today you would have something to say to me,” he said.
 
Elijah moved closer, until they were ten feet apart.

“Yes, there is,” she paused for effect, “You may call me Miss Emily in conversation.
 
Miss Worthing is too stuffy for friends such as us.”

“You are teasing me?
 
How awful,” he said.

“Am I not allowed any mischief?
 
You have caused your fair share, and I thought it to be my turn.”
 
Emily strolled from side to side, taking pleasure in his doubt.

“What mischief do you accuse me of?” he wondered.

“You arrived in Tripton to see Genevieve and falsely recommended yourself to me.”

“I never encouraged your affection for anything other than my personal feelings.”
 
Offense knit his brow together until he saw her smirk of amusement.

“You left without warning, after securing my affection.”

The Captain squinted, “For which I have apologized.”

“Attached my brother to yourself, knowing it would frustrate me,” said Emily.
 
Her heart beat fast as he took a step forward.

“Peter is a good man, and very clever.
 
I genuinely befriended him on his own merit.
 
Frustrating you was a happy byproduct.”

“Left me in Dunbarrow with doubt and bitterness.”
 

“I never wavered.
 
Any doubt was of your own making,” said Capt. Wingrave.
 
He followed her progress, from left to right, agitation growing by the moment that she would not hold still.

“Found a way back to Tripton so you could insert yourself in my company again, and argue with me?”
 
Elijah smiled.
 
Emily’s pace reminded him of a prosecuting attorney in court.

“Yes.
 
I missed that the most.”

“Intentionally caused me pain yesterday eve?”

“One moment of pain for a lifetime of joy?
 
I would do it again,” he assured her.
 
Emily froze in anger, and opened her mouth to protest, but Elijah closed the distance between them and kneeled.

“If I ever cease apologizing for how wrongly our romance has gone, I need only remember your face at this moment.
 
I was unprepared to meet you last spring, but… you have caused an explosion of growth and admiration in my very center rivaling the creation of the earth. You are searching for the safety that should accompany the greatest of loves, the kind that binds souls together as ours have been.
 
I can freely offer you that safety, and every piece of me, with no exceptions or sacrifices this day.

“I’ve waited so long to make love to you in any fashion that I wish, please end my banishment from your good opinion, and marry me.”

“Elijah?” said Emily.

“Yes?”
 
He held his breath.

“I love you.”
 
A tear escaped the corner of his eye, and he smiled.

“Are you still teasing me?” he whispered.

“If I was, would you break the engagement?”

“Never.”

“Then, yes.”
 
Elijah gathered her up, and they kissed with all the need held back over months of despair and insecurity.
 
It was a revelation to them both just how complete each of them felt with no objection or obstacle between them.
 
Feeling propriety slipping away, Emily pulled back, but allowed him to hold her, head against his chest.

“Do I know enough of the world now to wisely choose a husband?” she asked.

“Maybe a little too much,” he chuckled, “Even my Swordofficer told me I was a fool to allow you, who stirred up the entire fort, to escape me.
 
Earning your hand has been the most difficult task I’ve ever undertaken.”

Emily laughed, “A weaker man might not have survived.”

“Aye.
 
I’ve come close to finishing off a few myself.”
 
Emily gaped at his confession, to which Elijah only grinned.

It was a famous wedding, known throughout most of Endland, in which the three Worthing siblings married two Wingraves and an Annesley.
 
Many attended, friends, family, and hidden, not to mention obvious, rivals.
 
Rumors of Jude Annesley’s exile had spread with enough tangential information that no one could ferret out the truth, though Mary had finally come to a peace with it being known.
 
She had decided that acknowledging her mistake, should it become common knowledge, would make her stronger than acting in a way that assumed she was ashamed of a daughter like Genevieve, one of the sweetest souls she’d ever encountered.

Edward Annesley had made every possible amends to Bridget, and though she had understood from the beginning that his intention was not based on emotion for Emily, Bridget did not allow him to win her over easily.
 
She cut off any possibility that he might think it easy to turn his back on her again.
 
Jude’s absence relieved him, allowing Edward to see how much of his life he had based on the illicit actions of his brother.

Mary Wingrave found true love in the arms of Peter, and over time, forgave herself for fourteen years of fear.
 
Lord and Lady Wingrave admired such a son-in-law, and, heightened by the spirits of their children, welcomed people to Landhilton.
 
They met with Genevieve again, and began to understand how her upbringing had turned out a fine young lady.

Elijah and Emily played duets clear of any lurking sadness.
 
Emily’s real beauty had been uncovered with love, and Elijah became all the more enamored of her as it grew daily.

Swtnt. Worthing became Swordofficer Worthing with his new assignment as the chief of operations at Endland’s School for Officers.
 
Capt. Wingrave played his role of strict Headmaster when necessary, but usually spent his time growing Reddester, and adoring his new family.

What is feeling if it is all for naught?
 
Where is the line between logic and love?
 
What is the value of a secret when its sacrifices may cost more than its revelation?

“Not a chance I would answer those questions for you, my love,” said Emily.

“But why?” inquired Genevieve.

“Firstly, you will do as you please, as do most.
 
And secondly, how dull would life be, if you knew everything this instant?
 
What would you do with yourself?”
 
Genevieve thought this over.

“Yes, I suppose you’re right.
 
But, I’m afraid of being wrong,” she said.

Elijah answered, “Act honestly by your own values, and no one else’s.
 
Many a misstep can be avoided with simple truth.”
 
Emily arched an eyebrow at him, and he smiled at his wife.

“You have learned the pitfalls of deceit,” said Emily.

“And you, the purpose of mystery.”
 
Genevieve looked between them, viewing the tangible love they had, and was content with not knowing.

Gratitude and Author Information

Many thanks once again to Brice, my partner and extra pair of eyes.
 
He tore the manuscript with his sharpest teeth.