Promises, Promises (18 page)

He grabbed me by my waist and bent down so I would look him in his eyes. “No, really, I do want to know.” He was serious. I felt my face flush and my heartbeat picked up. “I really want to know more about you. You’ve got some crazy shit going on and I told you I’ve got a shoulder.”

“Yeah…” I stared into his eyes and then down to his shoulders. “You’ve really got great shoulders,” I blurted out, eyeing his chest and shoulders and then back up to his eyes. He smiled knowing I was thinking of other things. I was glad his eyes changed from the pity look that was there before. He looked like he was going to bend down his head to kiss me.
Oh please kiss me,
I was screaming in my head as I licked my lips.

Just then Clark walked in, “Hey Iz, it’s your turn again and I thought you were bringing beers for everyone.” Z’s eyes closed and I could see his jaw muscles flex. We both took a deep breath.

“Yeah, I’m, umm, I’m coming.” I stammered.

“No, but you look like you were going to try to!” Clark snickered. Asshole. I turned, grabbed a couple beers and walked back to the pool table. I overheard Z saying something to Clark and then heard a punch. “Owww!” Clark yelled out. I just smiled to myself, imagining what that exchange was.

Flynn and Melanie looked really cozy when I returned to the room. He was sitting on a bar stool and she was in between his legs, leaning in saying something. I felt really bad for walking in at that time. Flynn saw me and cleared his throat and Melanie backed up. Z and Clark came back in with their beers and we all started playing again.

After a few more games of pool we were all joking around and still drinking. By then I was more than buzzed, borderline drunk, and my pool playing was going down a little. Clark said “Wow, Iz, you play pool like a pro, you’re an awesome bartender and you cook…” Clark continued, “Is there anything you don’t do?”

I smiled real sexy, lined up a shot, glanced up at him and slowly said, “Girls... I don’t do girls,” and took my shot. Everyone busted out laughing and Melanie screamed out, “Now there’s my Izzy! Damn, I missed you girl!” She high fived me and hugged me. “I love you girl!”

I laughed, hugging her back and hollered out, “I missed you too Frackarooooooo!” Laughter erupted from the guys as they shook their heads.

Flynn was still laughing, but managed to ask, “What the fuck is Frackarooooo?”

Melanie and I burst out laughing so hard I thought I might pee myself. We were both crying, laughing at the names that Mack and Brad had nicknamed us — Frick and Frack — which after a night of hard core shots, turned the names into Fricker and Frackaroo.

Melanie started to try to tell the story, but only managed to get out, “Remember the alley after that frat party? And Brad tried to get Morgan to come back to his place?” We both started laughing harder remembering that night.

Then I added, “and then Mack was carrying you upside down and you started throwing up all over his back and it went down his underwear and when he put you down it trailed along his shoulder and …” and then I was laughing so hard I couldn’t finish the statement.

Melanie, still laughing, added in “then we fell into that puddle and were soaking wet and the guys were trying to get us to mud wrestle.”

Clark’s eyes lit up and he anxiously asked, “What? What happened then?”

Ignoring his question and continuing what little I could of the story, I could barely get out, “then Darrel jumped in to save us both and busted his tooth…and then…” We were literally on the ground rolling around like idiots laughing. All three guys were still laughing, but more so at the two of us being idiots remembering some stupid story that made absolutely no sense to them.

We were lying next to each other on the floor staring at the ceiling, still laughing and wiping our tears from laughter. Our laughs died down and Melanie turned serious. She gazed over at me with real tears forming in her eyes and quietly asked, “Why’d you leave me Iz? Why did you go off with HIM? How did I lose you to HIM? ‘Specially now that I know what HE did to you?”

I felt real tears forming in my eyes and whispered, “I’m so sorry Melanie, I’m so so sorry. You were dating Allen and I was working all the time and felt so alone and scared and HE took me to all these places and said I would never have to worry again and I…I just felt so alone.”

Melanie sat up quickly and burst out, “But you weren’t alone! You had ME! ME!” Pointing to herself with her face scrunched up and angry, she was crying now uncontrollably. I began to also as I sat up and shouted back, “No, I didn’t! You were always with Allen. Brad left and I had no one…I was all alone EVERY night.”

Melanie yelled back, “Then you should have told me you felt that way! You’re like my sister. You were supposed to tell me what you were feeling!”

I cried out, “I just wanted to feel loved, like Allen loved you…I had no one….and HE told me HE would be with me.”

“But HE told you in the beginning HE would never love you!” Melanie shot back at me.

“Fuck you!” I spat out. “I was taking what I could. I had no one, dammit…I had you for four years – we were always together and the second we graduated and got jobs, you and Allen were together and I barely saw you! I WAS ALONE...and…it sucked…it sucked so bad...” I was sobbing uncontrollably. I couldn’t stop my tears as I relived how it felt during that time. It was so lonely and scary.

The guys were just standing there, watching us sitting on the floor crying and trying to work it out, but also stunned that we were just laughing a second ago and now in full tears.

Melanie crawled over to me and pulled me into a hug. “I’m so sorry. I wish you would have said something. I’m so, so sorry…I never meant to hurt you…You’re like my sister...I love you...”

“I love you too…I’m sorry too...I should have said something, but I…you were just so happy and I was...just so miserable.” I stammered while sniffing back my tears.

She looked at me, tears streaming down her face, and quietly stated, “HE really messed with your head, didn’t HE?”

Sniffling, I just whispered, nodding my head, “Yeah.” She took a deep breath and hugged me.

Clark clapped his hands together once and said, “Okay, now kiss each other and make it a really good night for me!”

Melanie and I just looked at him and laughed. We hugged again and stood up. Z tried to help lighten the mood, “Well, Izzy, it looks like you’re never allowed to leave!”

I looked back at Melanie. “I’ll never leave you again.” I hugged her tightly.

We went back to our pool game. Melanie and I kept hugging every once in a while. During the game, Melanie got a text and her face lit up smiling. Flynn glanced at her as she nudged me. She showed me a text from some guy named Bill that said
Thinking about you. Remembering that incredible time in the back room with you
. I looked at her with my drunken eyes and asked “What’s that about?” She flushed and giggled.

Our thoughts were interrupted when Flynn looked at the time and said, “Well, some of us have to get up and work early tomorrow. I’m gonna head up.” He seemed a bit ticked off, but I couldn’t figure out why. Maybe because I made Melanie cry…again?

Melanie looked at him and teased, “What are you worried about? Can’t you handle work on a couple hours of sleep?”

Flynn snapped at her. “Some of us didn’t screw our boss, so I need to be on time.” And with that, he turned out of the room and went upstairs. The room got really quiet and Melanie looked as if she had been slapped. Z rubbed Melanie’s back and said, “Let it go, he’s just being an asshole.”

Clark broke the quiet by asking, “are you two gonna do anything? Like come on…seriously, kiss each other…full, like on the lips and maybe squeeze each other’s tits too!”

I sauntered sexily over to Clark and put my hand on his chest. “Nah, you missed our lez phase in college. It was fucking awesome.” I whispered into his ear a little loudly so Z could hear too. Clark’s eyes looked like they were going to pop out from excitement and Z had a shocked smirk on his face.

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. I whispered “Joking!” We all busted out laughing. Clark looked really disappointed.

Melanie interrupted our laughter and asked “Z, you’re staying on the couch, right?” It was more of a command then a question.

Z nodded his head and answered, “Yeah, I’ll hit the couch, as always.”

Clark said goodnight and headed up to bed. I started cleaning up some of the beer cans and peanuts. I always preferred to clean the mess while I’m still drunk. It made it easier to face a clean house in the morning and you never remembered doing it.

Melanie hugged me, “I love you. Please don’t leave me again.”

I nodded, “I won’t. I promise.”

Melanie started up the stairs but stopped, turned and asked, “Z, can I talk to you for a sec?”

“Sure.” he said walking over to her. They spoke in hushed voices then he gave her a bear hug saying good night to her. Melanie gave me another glance, looking as if she might say something else, but instead continued up the stairs.

Z started helping me clean up and looked at me smiling and shaking his head. “What?” I asked. He chuckled, “Fricker?” I laughed, getting out the broom and dust pan and started to clean up the peanuts.

I turned to him chuckling, “So what does Z stand for?”

“Still can’t guess?” He responded, smiling and a little flirtatiously.

“After that many beers, I can’t think of any names that start with the letter Z.”

He looked at me thoughtfully and gazed at me so intently that I thought I would melt. “Zander,” he said quietly.

“Ah.” I smiled trying to make light of his serious gaze so I wasn’t so drawn in. I glanced away unsure of what else to do.

He must have known I wanted to change the atmosphere and asked, “Is Izzy short for Isabelle?”

My mouth got dry. “Isabella, but I don’t want to ever go by that. Just…just Izzy.” I glanced back at him, his brows pulled together, clearly concerned.

“Okay,” he nodded his head as if knowing it had something to do with HIM.

He cleared his throat and came up to me and my heart beat faster. The fact that I didn’t want to be his rebound was quickly fading away and I didn’t seem to care anymore. I wet my lips because I kept thinking about his lips and how amazing they would feel pressed against mine again. He cupped my chin gently tilting my head towards his and stopped. I thought for sure he was going to kiss me. I started to close my eyes, but then he spoke as he touched my cheek, “Whenever you need to talk, I’ll be here.” Silence. Just silence between us. Although at that point, my heart was beating so fast and I swear, so loud. I was able to choke out “Uh-huh” and blinked my eyes quickly. His body was right up against mine and I felt his hardness against my body. I swallowed not knowing what was next. His eyes seemed a bit confused, as if he were trying to talk himself into something…or out of something. He dropped his hand from my face and backed away. Why didn’t he kiss me?

Broken from that connection, swallowing, I squeaked out, “So, do you need a pillow or blanket or something?”

“Uh, no thanks...I’m good.” As he started settling himself onto the couch.

I started to back myself over to the staircase. “Alright…I, um, I’m going to head upstairs. Goodnight.” And with that I quickly went up the stairs to my room and closed the door. Breathe. Being so close to Z just took my breath away. He was so warm and caring. I quickly got my PJs on, jumped into bed and pulled the covers up tightly. I wasn’t sure why, but I felt like I had to hold the blankets up to stop me from going back downstairs. I wanted to be in his strong arms. I lay there forever trying to not think about Z, but failed miserably. At least that’s a good change from trying not to think about HIM.

Chapter 11

Z

I lay on the couch with my heart beating out of my chest. I wanted to kiss her again so badly I ached. God, she smelled so fucking good. I could still smell her. She smelled like sweet flowers or something...maybe it was jasmine? I wanted to taste her lips, to feel her body against mine, thrust my fingers through her gorgeous hair again. She looked like she wanted to kiss me too. Didn’t she? Shit. I promised myself I wouldn’t go full speed with her and I knew if I kissed her right then, I’d take advantage of her being drunk and add to her thinking she was a rebound.

Mel told me before she went up to bed that both of us are coming out of bad relationships and that Izzy’s ex had really messed with her head. I was kind of thinking the same thing. I mean, what the hell did her ex do to her? Clark had said she mentioned a punishment? Like what kind of sick jerk punishes his girlfriend? Especially one that hot. What did Mel say again? That douche was controlling. No shit, he fucking punishes her over a beer.  I rolled over and tried to drift off to sleep feeling the buzz in full force and wondering what a punishment is. I decided in my haze I would get one of them drunk and figure out what the hell happened with that asshole and Izzy, then go beat the piss out of him.

Shit. I really want to go up to her room. I wanted to pull her close to me and bury my head in her hair after all that she said tonight during her fight with Mel. What did she say? She just wanted to be loved. I was already falling in love with her in such a short amount of time. How the hell can that be? I’ve never told a woman I loved her and here I was, only after a couple weeks knowing her, wanting to say it to her. I felt like I haven’t stopped thinking about her since she first walked into my bar. It took me a long time, but I finally dozed off to sleep.

The next morning I woke to the smell of coffee. I sat up and saw Flynn in the kitchen eating cereal.

“Hey.” he nodded at me.

“Hey yourself. Sleep well?” I asked him.

“Nah, I feel like shit. Especially after what I said to Mel.” He looked like shit too.

“Why the hell did you say that to her?” She slept with her boss way back before Flynn knew her. So what did it matter? He seems to be holding that over her or something. I haven’t figured it out.

“I said it because it’s true. She can go in whenever she wants to, more so because she slept with that douche. And I’m pretty sure he sexted her last night.”