Promises Linger (Promise Series) (33 page)

He paused to nibble on the side of her neck. He pulled his thumb almost free, pressing against his shaft through the membrane as he did, pushing it back in, feeling her pussy writhe and his cock throb as his calluses dragged against her tender inner flesh. “Do you understand?” She tilted her head to the side, facilitating his caress. “Yes. Oh yes.”

“Good.” With a click of his tongue, he urged Shameless forward.

He came twice more before finally drawing Shameless to a stop. He’d lost count how many times Elizabeth had come. Once she’d started, she hadn’t seemed able to stop. The pulses of her last orgasm were still shuddering through her body, and her anus was clenching on his thumb as he tried to pull free.

Her protest was immediate. “Not yet. Please. Not yet.”

“You want a little longer?” he asked against the top of her head.

“Please.”

He slid his thumb almost all the way out, and then slowly pushed back. Her pussy clenched around his softening cock, massaging it gently as he fucked her ass with his thumb.

“Like that?”

She shuddered and pushed down. “Yes. Perfect.”

He made a mental note of her enjoyment as he fucked her gently, bringing her down slowly. Her climax, when it came, was easy and sweet. When it was over, he slid his thumb from her ass and eased her off his softening cock.

She sagged against him breathlessly. Boneless and replete. She didn’t even protest when he unbuttoned his duster to lift and seat her crosswise over his lap. As he buttoned her back in, he felt her hands at his fly, returning the favor. Her task was complicated by material that was damp from their combined releases.

When she finished his pants, she worked on the front of her shirt, relying on his strength to keep her in the saddle, she asked, “Do you think Cougar will be happy with that Emily Carmichael?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know either of them, so I couldn’t say.”

She resettled her cheek in the wake of his movement. “I hope so.”

“You used to be sweet on this Cougar fella?”

“He’s a very decent man.”

When he thought of a decent man, Asa pictured someone harmless enough not to have options. Cougar McKinnely had the look of his namesake. Savage. Unpredictable. Dangerous. “That doesn’t answer my question.”

“When I was sixteen, I thought he was my hero.”

“Sixteen, huh? How old was he?”

“Nineteen.”

He refused to acknowledge the slight clutch in his stomach as jealousy. “What happened to change your mind?”

“I grew up and realized life doesn’t allow heroes.”

“He didn’t live up to your expectations?” Not surprising for a nineteen-year-old faced with the worship of a sixteen-year-old.

“He almost died for trying.” She seemed willing to let the conversation end there.

“Whoa, darlin’!” He tipped her chin away from the haven of his chest. Her expression was stubborn. Her lips pursed mutinously. “You can’t just drop things there.”

“Why not?”

“Because it sounds like I owe McKinnely.”

“It happened long before I met you.”

“You’re still my wife.”

She sighed. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

He could be as stubborn as she. “I do.”

She folded her arms across her chest and pressed her lips so tightly together, they all but disappeared.

Shameless tripped in a hole, jerking them a bit. As rigidly as Elizabeth was sitting, she almost popped off. Lucky for her, he had quick reflexes. “Got ya.”

“I never had any doubt.” She probably hadn’t as she hadn’t made a move to save herself.

That bit of trust went a long way to soothing his irritation. “You really going to leave me hanging like that?”

“There’s no need to go into something that happened long ago.”

Apparently she thought so, but there was more than one way to skin a cat. “I guess if you’re so set against finishing the story, I’ll be dropping the subject.”

Her “thank you” was carefully controlled, telling him she had a lot of emotions packed into it. Probably thought her secret was safe. He felt like smiling but didn’t. The woman really had to spend more time studying his nature rather than assuming she knew him, ‘cause sure enough, he wasn’t letting this go. He was just going to change his angle of attack. McKinnely probably wouldn’t be as tightlipped. He’d just ask him.

They rode in silence for awhile. Though he had his wife in his arms, Asa felt her withdrawal like a windstorm from the north. He’d always dreamed marriage would be an end to being alone, but he was discovering it wasn’t a cure for loneliness. Just the opposite. It could, he decided on a sigh, serve to point out how far a desperate man could grasp.

Elizabeth broke the silence. “Millicent said Emily wanted no part of Cougar.”

Apparently, they were back to the original subject. That strange knot took root in his stomach again. “Uh-huh.”

He felt her cheek working against his chest. He wondered if she were biting her lip. Through the gloom, he could see the ranch house.

“She said it was obvious because Emily pulled away every time he touched her.”

“Uh-huh.” He put as much boredom as he could into the phrase. He didn’t want to hear how wonderful McKinnely was.

“I don’t think that’s true.”

She didn’t? Despite his urge to avoid talking about good-looking-once-a-hero McKinnely, he had to hear this one. “You don’t?”

“No.”

“You don’t think a woman scooting a man’s touch is a sign she’s not too sweet on him?”

“No.”

“Why?”

Her shoulder pushed into his stomach as she took a deep breath. Had she been facing him, she would have blown him over when she let it out. “Because I used to pull away from you.”

It took him a minute to recover from the shock of dragging this particular subject into the open. He finally found his voice. “Not anymore.”

“It’s a fact I’m not proud of.”

“It doesn’t bother me.”

“Yes. It does.”

“You ever hear a wife shouldn’t disagree with her husband?”

“Yes.”

“So why are you disagreeing with me?”

“Because I think you like it.”

“I’d have to be a perverse S.O.B to like arguing.”

Shameless picked up his pace. Asa guessed he decided they were close enough to home to push the rules. Apparently, Elizabeth did, too, because she said, “But you do.”

He smiled. She was hanging in there despite the nervousness betrayed by her voice. “Why is that do you think?”

“I haven’t a clue.”

“But you’ve decided to humor me?”

“Not exactly.”

Her spine was stiffening up. As a result, she wasn’t moving with the horse, but more like bouncing on it. He waited. Three bounces later, he was rewarded.

“I’ve decided to use it,” she admitted.

“Anything in that fancy school say that’s a bit underhanded?”

“Yes.”

“And you’re not feeling guilty?”

“No. I’m being honest.” She took a breath, and he could tell she’d been thinking on this for awhile. “If I tell you, then it’s not trickery.”

“Some might call that hair-splitting,” he pointed out, not really minding.

“But not you?”

She sounded so hopeful, he didn’t have the heart to tease her. “No. I guess I can live with fair warning as long as you answer me one question.”

“What’s the question?”

“Why?”

“I’m not happy with our marriage.”

If Shameless hadn’t pulled up short in front of the hitching post, he probably would have jerked him to a halt. She’d blindsided him. He hadn’t seen it coming anymore than he’d anticipated the hurt. He kept his voice calm. “You’re not happy with our marriage, so you’re going to argue with me to improve it?”

He must not have been successful in covering his irritation because the hands that had been folded in her lap were stroking his forearm as if to soothe him. “Sort of.”

He tipped up her chin, but beyond a blush to her cheeks, her expression gave nothing away. He shook his head. “You’re going to have to explain that one, ‘cause, sure enough, you lost me in the twists and turns.”

Her chin butted his finger, but he didn’t heed the silent demand. Given no other option, she evaded his searching gaze by lowering her lids. “I can’t.”

He pondered a minute. The whole conversation had started out with the way Emily evaded Cougar’s touch, and how Elizabeth didn’t feel that was a sign that a woman didn’t like the touch of a man. Shameless snorted and stomped his foot. Willoughby echoed the impatient sound. Asa ignored both. “Are you saying you don’t dislike my touch?”

He might not have been successful in hiding his astonishment. Her whole body winced at his shout. “Lower your voice!”

“Well,” he asked, keeping his voice down, “are you?”

“It’s hard to say.”

“I think we’d better go into the house and discuss this.”

“No!”

“You want to sit out here in the cold when there’s a perfectly warm house a few feet away?”

“Please. Just let me say this before I lose my—”

He leaned back in the saddle. “Never let it be said I’d interrupt a lady.”

Her “You just did” was a muttered aside. For once, he didn’t feel like smiling when the real Elizabeth snuck past her prim disguise.

“I’m not used to being touched. My father wasn’t very…demonstrative that way.” She cut him a quick glance from under her lashes. “You touch me a lot.”

He shrugged. “You feel good.”

“I’m not saying it’s bad. I’m just not comfortable with it.”

“You seemed damned comfortable a few minutes ago.”

“That’s not what I’m talking about.” She took an audible breath. “The truth is, I’m afraid of how much I like it when you touch me!” she confessed in a breathless rush.

The blurted-out truth hung between them. The knot in his stomach that had been there since she’d mentioned McKinnely and her dissatisfaction with their marriage started to loosen. “Why?”

“You’ll stop and I’ll be used to it.”

And she didn’t want to be hurt. That he understood. “Why would I stop?”

“When I disappoint you, you’ll stop.”

“You know, I’m getting darned tired of everyone telling me what I’m going to do and not do.”

“I wouldn’t presume!”

“Like hell!” He reached for the buttons of the coat holding them together. Who did she think she was kidding? “First, you decided I’d sell my soul for a ranch. Then you decided I needed to be tricked into finishing a marriage. Then you decided I was a cheating sort.” His anger built as each button of the coat popped open. “Next, you assumed I had no control over my needs and you had to bargain against cheating, and now, you’ve come up with the fact that I’m tricking you every time I act less than a monster?” He swung out of the saddle. “Well, I’m tired of being insulted.”

“I didn’t mean—”

He placed her on the ground and pointed her to the house. “You never do, but every time you get thinking, I get insulted, and I’m damned tired of it.”

She ignored his push and turned around. “Where are you going?”

“I’m going to settle Shameless and Willoughby for the night.”

She bit her lip. Her expression was barely discernible through the light. “Are you coming up to the house?”

“Where else would I go?” He pulled the horses around. “We have a deal remember?”

“Would you let me explain?”

“I don’t think my sensibilities can take another of your explanations.”

He turned and headed for the barn, seething inside. He’d done nothing but treat the woman with respect, and she persisted in seeing him as vermin. It wasn’t going to change, and he’d best get it through his thick skull, because, dammit, it was beginning to hurt. He could feel her eyes watching him as he entered the barn. Without turning around, he closed the door.

Elizabeth stared at the closed door until a voice from the shadowed end of the porch spun her around.

“He’s right, girl.” There was the creak of the swing, and then two disjointed steps before Old Sam stepped into the light. “You’ve been trying to slip that man into a crevice since he got here.”

“I don’t understand him,” she burst out.

“You probably would if you’d just see he isn’t your Pa.”

“I don’t think he is.”

“If that’s the case, why are you expecting him to change into something else?”

“I’m not.”

Old Sam spat over the side rail. “And I was born yesterday. Ever since your Dad changed after your Mama died, you’ve had this fear of men. Like everything good inside one is just fool’s gold.”

“That’s not true!”

“If it’s not, then you’d better start thinking before you open your mouth.” He came up bedside her, and, for the first time in sixteen years, there wasn’t any sympathy in his faded blue eyes. “‘Cause that’s the picture you’re painting.”