Promise Me Always (19 page)

Did he just say fuck lines?

“Fuck lines, huh? Nice terminology,” I giggled. “And yes, I do like them.”

He slowly started to unbutton his pants, his eyes never leaving mine. “Do they make you want to fuck me?” He stepped out of his pants and watched me take him in all of his glory. He was standing there in front of me, a true sight to behold, and my greedy eyes couldn’t get enough of him. My panties were getting wetter with every defined muscle my eyes raked in.

“Yes,” I panted.

“Then they are doing their job,” he smirked and leaned over me, pulling me down to the end of the bed. He tugged on my panties as I lifted my hips again, helping him get them off. After he dropped them to the ground, he helped me sit up. He reached around, unclasping my bra with one hand, and it sprang open. He slid it down my arms, leaving goose bumps in the wake of his touch.

“Do you know what makes me want to fuck you?” he asked as he laid me back down on the bed.

“What?” I uttered, barley able to speak.

His eyes roamed over my now naked body. He bent forward, trailing kisses up my stomach to my breasts. Stopping to take one of my nipples in his mouth, I moaned when his tongue flicked it. He sucked on it for a few moments while he rolled the other in his fingers. Then he continued kissing up my neck, biting and nipping as he went.

“Everything,” he whispered into my ear. “Your beautiful body, your amazing breasts, your perfect ass. But the part of you that makes me want to fuck you most is your soft, kissable, smart ass mouth.”

I giggled at his comment as he claimed my mouth with his. Our tongues stroked each other as his hands fondled my breasts. I arched my back, pushing them into his hands, and he pinched my nipples.

“I need you inside me, Blake. I need to feel you. Please,” I whimpered.

He stood up and pulled me down further, so my ass was hanging off of the edge of the bed. “After I’m in, wrap your legs around me.” He entered me slowly at first, making me groan as he filled me.

“Always so wet,” he growled as he pushed into me. Once he was all the way in, I did as instructed and wrapped my legs around his waist.

“You might want to hold on to the mattress, baby girl. I’m going to fuck you hard.” I moved my hands so that I was gripping the bed, waiting for him to pound into me. He pulled his hips back and slammed into me rough and quick.

“Yes, Blake! Again! Harder!” I cried out in pleasure. He pulled back and crashed into me over and over again, hammering into me harder with each thrust. My fingers dug into the mattress as I screamed out his name.

“Make me come,” I told him and he picked up the pace. The sound of our flesh slapping together and Blake’s moans echoed through the room.

“I need you to come all over me.” He pushed into me again as he rubbed my clit with his hand and that was it—I cried out as my orgasm hit me in furious waves. He stopped pounding into me as he fell apart with me, never tearing his eyes from mine. When I came back down, he was lying on top of me and we were both breathing heavy.

He rolled off of me and pulled me close. I was lying on his chest, tracing his tattoo with my finger. “Do you really forgive me, baby girl?” he asked softly, his voice cracking with hope.

“Of course, Blake. I wouldn’t lie to you about something like that,” I assured him. “Are you really sorry? Or were you just lying to get me in bed?” I teased.

“I don’t think you know just how sorry I am. And I would never lie to you, Tess. Ever,” he said as he kissed my head reverently.

“Promise me?” I asked.

“Always.”

It had now been just over three weeks since Tess invaded my life and I was in deep shit. She occupied my mind, heart and soul twenty four hours a day. I spent every free moment I had with her. When I was at the station, it was like a piece of me was absent—I wasn’t whole without her around.

I knew I was falling hard for her. While I thought of her every minute of every day, I couldn’t shake the nagging feeling that had followed me my entire life, the one that had burrowed so far into my psyche that it was like a song on repeat that you just can’t get out of your head. I knew I didn’t deserve anything good to happen to me and I sure as shit wasn’t worthy of her love. This was especially true after what I had done to her the night of her graduation party. She deserved the world and I knew I was going to mess up again. That’s why I never talked to her about what I said that night; how I told her we weren’t together. It was only a matter of time before she found someone better, someone that would give her everything she deserved. When that day came, and it would come, it was going to be the end of me.

I needed Tess in my life, even if that meant we were just friends. I would gladly suffer every day for the rest of my life just to make sure she was happy. She deserved the very best that this fucked up world could offer—a man that could be there for her no matter what it cost him, a man that would love her unconditionally and a man that wasn’t such a royal screw up. I knew I would always be there for her as long as I lived, but I also knew myself—having me in her life would ultimately make a mess of it.

All I could do was wait and pray that I would get enough time with her before something went wrong and I disappointed her. If I were smart, I would call it all off now and make my suffering significantly less, but I couldn’t do it. I needed her.

To put it bluntly, I was screwed either way.

I knew we were created for each other—there was no denying that. Our bodies were made for each other, molding together like the colors of fire, weaving and blending together to create the flame. I knew her body like it was my own, every curve and crevasse committed to memory. When I pulled her close to me, we fit like a puzzle… except the corner of my puzzle piece was chipped, blemished and imperfect to her perfection. It was the depth of my imperfection that would drive us apart; I was un-repairable. As much as it made me sick to think about it, that was the truth of the situation. And it really pissed me off.

A knock on the door snapped me from my thoughts. The thought of who stood on the other side made my body blaze with anticipation. I walked over to the door and was greeted by the flawless sight of Tess’ large, brown eyes staring up at me. I roamed my eyes over the length of her body, taking in every curve that I had become so familiar with over the past three weeks. She was wearing a sexy, black, v-neck halter top that showed off her perfect tits and the sexiest pair of white cut off jean shorts I had ever seen. Her legs went on for miles and her black sandals made my dick spring to life.

“Do you like something you see, Mr. Bentley?” she questioned, raising her eyes at me. She stepped through the door, letting her hand graze across my chest as she walked passed me. This woman was seriously going to be the death of me.

“I see quite a few things I like, baby girl.” I watched her picture perfect ass sway from side to side as she walked into the living room. “There are a few other things that I would like to see more of though.”

She looked at me over her shoulder, batting her eyes lashes. “Well, maybe if you’re a good boy tonight you will get a private viewing.”

How did she always know just what to say to make me hard? God, I loved her! Wait —what the hell?

Oh, fuck!

My breath caught in my throat and my heart began to race as the realization hit me—I was absolutely, one hundred percent in love with her.

Holy Shit! I love her!

I couldn’t move, waiting for the fear to set in… but it didn’t. My emotions were all over the damn place, but I knew two things in that moment – I loved this girl with everything I had and there was no way I was letting her go now.

I shut the door and walked over to her, seizing her around the waist as I pulled her to me. I captured her mouth, assaulting it with mine. Moving my hands up her body, I cupped my hand around her face while my other hand grabbed the back of her neck. She let out a low moan, pushing her body into mine. I knew where we were going to end up if I didn’t let up, but hell, she tasted so good I didn’t want to stop. We were going to be late for the party though and I needed to help Matt set some stuff set up before everyone arrived. I eventually let her come up for air, resting my forehead against hers, trying to catch my breath. I murmured, “What are you doing to me, Tess?”

She giggled a little, “I think I should be asking you the same thing.”

Running her fingers through my hair, she sent chills up and down my spine. “I mean it, Tess, I cannot think straight anymore. You’ve turned my whole fucking world upside down.” I took a step back, running a hand through my short hair. She looked confused and I wanted to go right back over to her, but I needed to get this out and I couldn’t concentrate when she was that close to me. I took her hand in mine so she wouldn’t feel like I was rejecting her.

“I know I’m going to fuck this up between us somehow, baby girl, I can feel it. I almost did two weeks ago and you deserve so much more than I can give you.” I let out the breath I had been holding. “You know that right? If I were smart I would end this now—I would save us the heart break and the pain and just get it over with.”

She looked down and removed her hand from mine. Her breathing picked up; she was hurt and I saw her wipe away a tear. She thought I was rejecting her.

I took another step towards her, lifting her chin up so I could look her in the eyes as I finished what I had to say. “But you make me feel alive, Tess. You make me whole. I don’t want to be friends with benefits.” Her eyes widened and I heard her breath hitch in her throat. Tears filled her eyes again and I hoped to hell it wasn’t because she was going to disagree with where I was going with this. “I know you could do a hell of a lot better than me, so if you want this to end, say it now and I’ll walk away. We can go back to being friends, because, honestly, I have to have you in my life. But if you want me, if you want all of me, then say the word and we can go down this crazy fucking road together.” I stroked her cheek with my thumb, relishing the contact between the two of us. “No matter what, I
will
be in your life. Do you understand me? I will not lose you.”

My fucking heart was pounding, threatening to beat out of my chest. I stared at her, gauging her reaction, but she gave away nothing. Neither a smile nor a frown on that beautiful face, she just stared back blankly. I was going to lose it soon if she didn’t say something—anything!

Fear began coursing through my veins. Maybe she didn’t want me. She knew she deserved more and she was about to rip my fucking heart out. I felt gutted, exposed—ruined. My hand dropped from her face as my head fell, my stomach knotting and twisting. This was the moment I had been dreading—the moment that was inevitable. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, preparing myself to walk away. Tess still hadn’t said anything, her silence a sure fire indicator that she didn’t want me.

“Blake…I can’t…” She paused for a moment, taking a deep breath and closing her eyes briefly before reopening them again. “I can’t walk away from you. I want you—all of you. I want to go down this crazy fucking road with you and never look back.” She searched my eyes, gauging my reaction. I reached up and caressed her face, silently thanking God for this miracle. “I need you, Blake” she whispered, wrapping her hair around her fingers and looking up at me.

I released the breath I had been holding, relieved as hell that she felt the same way. It truly felt like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I simply grinned at her, saying the only thing that came to my mind. “Promise me?”

She smiled back with her eyes beaming at me, a small chuckle escaping her lips, “Always.” She pushed up on her tiptoes and planted a soft, sweet kiss on my lips. I returned the kiss gently, holding her close. I took her hands that had been resting on my chest and positioned them around my neck as I deepened the kiss, invading her mouth with my tongue.

Just as things were heating up, she pulled back from the kiss, catching me off guard. “Friends with benefits, huh? Is that what you thought we were doing?” A huge smile spread across her face.

“Well, yeah, kind of,” I shrugged. “We hadn’t really talked about it. I thought a little clarification was needed,” I said, sheepishly.

“That was one dramatic way to get things cleared up, you asshole!” she laughed. “You freaked me out for a second, but I’m glad you did it. To be honest, I kind of thought the same thing. I didn’t really know what we were doing either.” She was playing with her hair again and it made me want to pick her up, take her to my bedroom, and show her just how sexy I thought she looked when did it. She looked down at her watch.

“Crap! We better get going! Matt will be waiting for you to help set up and we were supposed to be there two minutes ago!”