Promise Me (34 page)

And maybe I’d be okay with it.

Or maybe I was just kidding myself.

* * *

“And just where have you been all night?” I asked Kate several hours later when she hopped up onto the tailgate of my truck with a wide smile on her face.

She was drunk. That much I could tell, but at least she looked happy.

She looked at me like I was nuts. “You don’t know?”

I shook my head. “No, I’ve barely seen you.”

It was a lie. I’d been tracking her around the party all night, but it had been intermittent. I’d known enough to know that she was okay, but I’d forced myself to let her be – at least for a little while.

“So you haven’t had eyes on me like you did at the last party, watching my every move, making faces at the guys I was talking to, and shooting daggers their way if they got too close?” she asked, her eyes sparkling.

I held a finger up to make a point. “First of all, I didn’t do any of that at the last party – much, and second of all, I told you to have fun and let loose. What kind of friend would I be if I watched you the whole time. I trust these people here, and so I knew you’d be fine.”

She nodded like she didn’t believe me, but she didn’t say anything. I took that as a good sign.

“So what have you been doing while I haven’t been watching you?” I asked her as I drained the last of my beer.

“I’ve been breaking in my new boots, enjoying some cocktails, and getting to know the fine people of Grantly, Texas. You know, doing all the things you told me to do.”

“Are you having fun?”

She leaned back a little further and grinned at me. “So much fun. I kissed a boy.”

I frowned at that little tidbit of information. “Who did you kiss?”

At least I knew it wasn’t one of my friends. I’d been with them all night, but I wasn’t sure the alternative was much better, depending on who it was.

Kate shrugged nonchalantly. “I’m not sure. He was cute, and he was sweet, so I kissed him. I think I took him by surprise. For some reason he thought I was your girlfriend, and he was afraid you were going to kick his ass. But I set him straight. In fact, I set a lot of people straight tonight. They all thought I was your girlfriend, and they all called me Alyssa when they met me. That was weird. It was especially weird when your best friends thought that, though. Haven’t they met her before?”

As soon as she said that, guilt washed over me. My friends had been giving me a hard time all night about the fact that they’d never met my girlfriend, and I was home with another girl who I claimed was just a friend. It wasn’t just Trey. None of them believed that there wasn’t something going on with Kate and me. Just because she was beautiful, they couldn’t comprehend that I could be friends with her without wanting to sleep with her. What they didn’t understand was that our friendship wasn’t about sex. It was about so much more than that.

“Taylor!” Kate said before I could respond. “That was his name.”

“Who’s name?”

“The boy I kissed. His name was Taylor.”

“Oh, Taylor Vine. Yeah, I saw you talking to him. He’s a good guy.”

That was somewhat of a relief, even if I still didn’t like the idea of her kissing guys at random. I couldn’t let her know that, though. I had to play it cool.

Kate shrugged as she moved closer to where I was leaning against the side of my truck. “He was nice,” she said as she ended up right next to me.

And then she laid her head on my shoulder. I looked down at her, not sure what to do. On one hand, I really liked her head there, but it was also a little too close for comfort – or at least too close to not make me feel guilty for liking her pressed up against me.

“You okay?” I asked Kate as I saw her eyes close.

She nodded. “Mmm-hmm. Just resting my eyes. They’re tired. The smoke from the fire was starting to burn them.”

She smelled like a campfire, and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t love it. It reminded me of comfortable things and laid back nights and nowhere to be the next day. It reminded me of home, and in a different way than the field party and my friends and my hometown, Kate was home for me. It was like my two worlds had converged in that one moment.

“Oh, I love this song,” she said as the Luke Bryan track switched over to
Renegades
by X Ambassadors.

I looked down to see her head resting on my shoulder. Her eyes were still closed, but she was mouthing the words to the song. I smiled at the sheer adorableness of the moment, but then I had to look away, because I’d started to think things that would get me in trouble – things I’d vowed not to think.

“Are you sure you don’t want to go back and kiss Taylor some more?” I teased her, sort of hoping she wouldn’t say yes, but if she did it would probably be for the best. I couldn’t sit there and get jealous when I wasn’t in a position to do that.

Kate shook her head. “He left. He said he had to get up early for church in the morning. Isn’t that sweet?”

“It’s adorable.”

“I thought so,” she said sleepily.

“Are you going to make it much longer? Do we need to head home?”

She shook her head again. “Just give me a minute. You’re warm and soft, and it’s so comfortable here.”

Yeah, I was sort of thinking the same thing.

“Stay as long as you like,” I told her, and from across the party, I saw Trey give me a funny look.

I just shook my head. He was so full of it.

“Do you know what sounds kind of amazing right now?” Kate asked me a few seconds later.

“What’s that?”

“I would love to be sitting in your hot tub, drinking a glass of wine, and looking up at the stars.”

And I’d love to be sitting across from you in that hot tub watching you do those things.

Dammit.

“We can do that,” I said, because apparently I was no longer thinking clearly. Kate and me, drunk in a hot tub late at night was definitely a recipe for bad decisions.

Her head popped up. “We can?!”

“Sure, we can do whatever you want.”

I was such a sucker for her. I couldn’t even stop myself from giving in to whatever she wanted.

“I definitely want to do that, but are you sure you want to leave the party? You’ve barely seen your friends.”

“We actually hung out all night. I got my fill. Besides, it’s late, so they’re all pairing off with the person they’re likely going to take home.”

“So they’re not sweet like Taylor Vine?”

“No, most of them aren’t. I doubt any of them will make it to church in the morning.”

“Shame.”

I laughed at that. “
You
don’t go to church.”

“Oh, I wasn’t talking about
that
being shameful. I was talking about the not nice part. I like sweet guys. I want the next guy I date to be sweet.”

“I’m sure you won’t have any trouble finding a sweet guy. I’d dare say that you could have your pick of guys. You just have to find the right one.”

“I already found one,” she grumbled.

“Who?”

I hoped she wasn’t talking about Justin, because he wasn’t someone I’d define as sweet.

“It’s no one,” she said, and then she looked away. When she turned back to me a few seconds later, her eyes had the same light in them as they’d had before. “Hot tub?”

I laughed. “Let’s go.”

“You’re the best,” she said as she hopped out of the back of my truck.

She looked so natural doing that, and in her navy sweater, skinny jeans, and those boots, it was a sight to behold. She was a complete country girl – at least on the outside – and I absolutely loved it.

Chapter Sixteen

Kate

I opened my eyes expecting light to be shining into the room, but it was pitch dark, save for a tiny bit of light to my left. It wasn’t morning like I’d assumed, and I figured I’d left the bedside table lamp on when I’d gone to sleep – which I couldn’t actually remember doing.

I turned my head so I could reach over to switch it off, and when I did, my heart tried to jump out of my chest. Jack was there, in my bed, and it wasn’t a light from a lamp that had been illuminating a small part of the room. It was a reading light that was in his hand, and it was shining over what I thought was a textbook.

Suddenly things were very confusing, and since my head was already fuzzy, I had the very strong inclination that I was dreaming.  But if Jack was in my bed, it was kind of a good dream, so I decided to savor it for a few seconds. When else would he be in there again. I figured I might as well enjoy the moment.

And man did he look good. He was wearing a gray hoody, his dark hair was tousled like he’d been running his hands through it, and he was wearing dark-rimmed glasses that I’d never seen him wear before, but it was a completely hot look on him. From the little light the reading light gave out, I could just make out his features, and I had to smile at the studious expression on his face. It was like my mind had conjured up the most alluring image of him it could find, just to torture me – and apparently in that image he wore glasses. I guess my mind was smarter than me, because I liked Jack in glasses. I definitely didn’t want to wake up from the dream.

Then within half a heartbeat, dream Jack looked over at me. “Oh, you’re awake. Do you need to get sick?”

Well that was an odd question.

I shook my head and smiled. “Nope. I’m good.”

I just wanted to stare at him a little longer, because in real life I couldn’t do that. If I did, he’d know in second that I liked him as so much more than a friend, and he couldn’t know that. He had a girlfriend, and for reasons that I’d never be able to explain, he wanted to be with her. I had to respect that.

But that became a really hard thing to do when he invited me home to meet his family, introduced me to all of his friends, bought me a ridiculously expensive pair of cowboy boots as a ‘just because’ gift, and smiled at me like I was the only person in the room. It was a head trip of sorts, and I had to continuously remind myself that what I was seeing and feeling weren’t real.

“Well, then you have the tolerance of a champion,” dream Jack told me, and I just smiled.

“I guess I do.”

In real life I was probably going to wake up and do exactly what he’d said, considering how much I’d drank the night before. It was only wine, so I might be alright, but I had no recollection of how much I’d actually consumed. The night had been all about getting enough alcohol into my system so I could let loose like Jack had told me to do but not let loose so much that I threw all my good sense out the window and did something I’d regret.

So I’d kissed his friend. Yeah, I was likely going to regret that in the morning too. Taylor was nice, and he’d been sweet, but I knew I’d only kissed him because I was trying to distract myself from thinking about Jack. I had serious issues.

“What are you reading?” I asked dream Jack.

He smirked at me and held up the book. “Just a little Bio Chem.”

“Sounds thrilling,” I said as I snuggled further under the covers. Dream Jack was nerdy, and I found it to be completely sexy.

“Are you cold?” he asked me, and my first inclination was to tell him yes and ask him if he’d warm me up, but I guess even the dreaming version of me had a little sense left.

“I’m fine,” I told him. “What time is it?”

Jack glanced over at the clock on the bedside table. “Three-thirty.”

“And you just felt the need to read Bio Chem in my bed?” I teased him.

Even though it was dark in the room, there was a small amount of light still coming from the book light, and from it I thought I saw dream Jack’s cheeks flush, but I wasn’t sure.

“I, uh, I had a nightmare,” he said sheepishly, and I knew then that he was definitely blushing. “I didn’t – I didn’t want to be alone.”

“Nightmares suck,” I agreed, glad I was having the adverse of one that I pretty much didn’t want to wake up from.

He nodded.

“What was it about?”

He sucked in a deep breath and let it out slowly. “It was about my parents. We were in the living room in our trailer, and my dad was yelling at my mom. I watched him hit her several times from the doorway where I was trying to stay hidden, but it was too painful to just stand there and do nothing, so I stepped into the light. That was when he pulled out a knife. He leered at me for a few seconds, told me he was going to take care of me once and for all, but before I could do anything, he reached over and slit my mom’s throat. It was awful,” he said, shaking his head. “I went to her as soon as she collapsed, but I knew it was too late. There was too much blood. That was when I felt the knife slice into me. My dad waited until I wasn’t looking.”

“What happened then?” I asked him, so glad the real Jack wasn’t plagued by the same horrible images.

“I woke up,” he said gratefully. Then he shook his head. “But I couldn’t sleep, and I didn’t want to be alone. I hope it’s okay that I came in here.”

I smiled. “It’s fine. I never kicked you out of my room when we were kids, and I’d never do it now.”

Hell, now I’d probably invite him to stay the night if he ever showed up in my room for real.

He returned my smile. “Thank you. I honestly figured you’d never know I was here. After we left the party, you sort of passed out, and I’m not sure if you know this, but you sleep like a dead person. I carried you all the way up here, I put you in bed, and you never moved. To be honest, I did a check just to make sure you were still breathing.”

“That was nice of you.”

“It’s the doctor in me, I suppose. I’d have felt really guilty if you’d died and I didn’t even know it.”

“Oh, is that the only reason you’d have felt guilty?” I asked sarcastically.

He smiled. “No, I’d have never forgiven myself if that happened.”

“I’d just come back as a ghost and haunt you anyway, so I’d never let you forget it.”

“I’m sure you would. Hey, if you’re awake, you might want to change out of your jeans. I didn’t want to even try to get them off of you, since I knew I’d wake you up.”

As he said that, I realized my legs did feel constricted. I was still wearing the skinny jeans that I’d worn to the party. How could I feel that in a dream? That was odd.

Or it meant that I wasn’t
actually
dreaming. Oh shit, was this not a dream? Did that mean that everything that had happened since I’d thought the dream had started had actually been real? If so, that meant that Jack was actually in my bed, he was sitting next to me at three in the morning, and he’d actually had a nightmare.
Oh crap.

“You okay?” Jack asked me.

My gaze shot up to him. “Am I awake?”

He nodded, but his expression was laced with confusion and concern. “I’d say so – unless you can carry on conversations in your sleep.”

“Will you pinch me?” I asked him, and he laughed.

Then he reached over and gently squeezed my hand. When nothing happened, I knew the past few minutes had been real, and as soon as I came to that conclusion, I started to notice everything real about the moment. My head was a little swimmy, my mouth tasted like cotton balls had been stuffed into it, and I was still fully clothed. And I had to pee.
Dammit.

But it was one of those moments that felt like if I disrupted it in any way, it would be over. And the fact that Jack was in my bed was a moment I didn’t want to jeopardize. But damn, I suddenly wanted to brush my teeth, wash my face, and change into something comfortable.

“What’s wrong?” Jack asked me.

I bit my lip before saying. “If I excuse myself for a few minutes, will you be here when I get back?”

“Sure. Why?”

I shook my head as I started to sit up and slid out of bed. “I do want to get out of these jeans, so I’ll be back in a few.”

I wasn’t sure I had a justifiable reason in which I could tell him why I wanted him to stay. I just knew I wanted to capitalize on the moment, and I hoped he wouldn’t ask me to explain it. He was there, and I didn’t want him to go. It was as simple as that.

“Take your time,” he said as I grabbed a pair of yoga pants and a long sleeve t-shirt and ducked into the bathroom.

When I came back out a few minutes later, Jack was where he’d been before, seemingly immersed in his book. He’d flipped the bedside light on, and he held up a finger to let me know he needed a minute, so I took a seat on the bed and crossed my legs in front of me, not sure what to say to him. It was one of the weirdest moments of my life, but it was also one of the greatest.

“Okay, I’m done,” he announced as he closed his book and set it on the bedside table.

“That good, huh?” I teased him.

He shrugged. “It’s not exactly a page turner, but I think it’s interesting.”

“Well, I guess that’s good, considering you want to be a doctor. I, on the other hand, already know that I find bio chemical reactions to be about as interesting as watching paint dry, so I guess it’s good that I
don’t
want to be a doctor.”

Jack smiled. “I think you’ll be great at marketing.”

“Oh yeah? And what makes you so sure that’s what I’m going to end up doing?”

His smile morphed into a smirk. “Because I know Aunt Deena offered you an internship. I also know you’re going to take it, and you’re going to love it. The rest will be semantics.”

He said it like it was so simple. I wondered if it really could be.

“She told you about that?” I questioned sheepishly. “I actually wasn’t sure if she was serious.”

“Of course she was serious. I told you she’d be interested in having you work for her.”

“Well, I wasn’t sure
you
were serious when you told me that. We barely knew each other when you offered her up as a potential future employer.”

“I knew you,” Jack reminded me. “And I talked to her about it when I was home last time. She said she wanted to meet you first, but she was interested back then. I’d say it’s a sign that she likes you if she offered you a job.”

“I’ll say,” I said, feeling a little overwhelmed by everything that had transpired in the past twenty-four hours. I was also possibly still a little drunk and half-asleep, so processing things wasn’t coming as quickly as it usually did.

“So how are you feeling?” Jack asked me. “I left a trashcan by the bed in case you got sick.”

“I saw that. Thank you, but I’m okay.”

He nodded. “I’m glad to hear it.”

“Since when do you wear glasses?” I asked him, changing the subject, because I really didn’t want to discuss whether or not I was going to throw up. I was hoping for not.

“I’ve worn them since I started school here. I’d been having trouble seeing the board for a while, but I didn’t know it until Aunt Deena took me for an eye test. I wore glasses for a year before I got contacts.”

I nodded in understanding. “That’s why I’ve never seen you wear them.”

“Yeah, I don’t tend to wear my glasses unless I’m about to go to bed or have just woken up.”

“And you’ve never been in my bed at three in the morning before.”

Just calling out the elephant in the room . . .

“This is true, although when you say it, it sounds kind of dirty. You’re cool that I’m here, right? I was honestly hoping you’d never know. I just didn’t want to be alone, and I needed to get my head straight before I went back to sleep. And for the record I was going to go back to my room for that. I wouldn’t have stayed.”

“It’s fine that you’re here,” I told him, because it really was. “Feel free to stay as long as you’d like. As odd as this should be, it actually feels sort of normal.”

Jack looked introspective as he said, “I know, right. How many nights did I climb through your window in that last year that we were neighbors?”

“I can’t even count. It was a lot, but I was glad to see you each and every time. Was that nightmare you had tonight – is that normal for you? Do you have them a lot?”

“It’s hit or miss,” he said around a sigh. “I can go months at a time and not have one, but then I might have one three nights in a row. They’ve lessened as I’ve gotten older, and I can usually wake myself up if they get particularly bad, but I guess I was pretty out of it tonight, and I didn’t wake up until it was over.”

“What do you mean ‘over’?”

Jack sighed. “The dreams vary in how they play out, but in all of them there’s a point where I stop standing in the shadows and decide to fight back against my dad. Usually I wake up before he ever strikes me, because I know it’s coming, but once and a while, like tonight, he takes my life after he takes my mother’s. That’s why I was so rattled. In that moment in the dream, I knew I was going to die. It’s hard to wake-up and not think that at least for a little while.”