Private Passions (12 page)

But none of this is real,
a mean
little voice that sounded remarkably like Hal's chided her. What
would happen when she had to go back to her real life and all of
the chaos that surrounded it?

Then that discouraging little voice
disappeared into the background as Deck reached up and pulled her
back down next to him. "Come here, sweet thing," he said as he took
her mouth in a deep, lavish kiss. His big, callused hand cupped her
breasts before sliding lower.

Her legs eagerly parted at the probing of his
fingers. They both groaned as her juices soaked the hand he pressed
against her. "Do you know how much it turns me on," he said
tightly, "to feel how wet you are just from sucking my cock?"

One finger, then two, slipped inside, probing
deep, and Jane rolled to her back with a whimper, her legs splaying
open. Deck bent his head, sucked her nipple hard between his teeth,
thrusting into her with his fingers, giving his wrist a delicious
little twist with every stroke that soon had her moaning and
tossing her head helplessly against the cushion.

But as good as his fingers felt, as amazing
as his thumb felt stroking against the tight bud of her clit, it
wasn't enough. She needed Deck inside her, the whole hard, huge
length of him buried deep. Filling her up until she forgot about
anything but him. Until there was nothing outside of what they were
sharing together, nothing beyond this private little world that
existed for only the two of them.

She reached down and wrapped her hand around
him. A little purr of satisfaction vibrated in her throat when she
found him already rock hard and ready to go despite the fact she'd
just rocked his world.

"Inside me," she demanded, tugging gently at
his cock to prove she meant business.

He rolled on top of her and spread her thighs
with his knees. She could feel his fingers trembling slightly as
his hand covered hers and guided the thick head of his erection to
the slick entrance of her sex.

Her breath whistled through her teeth at that
first penetration, sensation curling in her belly as her body
stretched to accommodate him. Her toes curled at that first thick
slide, her orgasm already bearing down on her.

"Christ, you feel so good," Deck said as he
withdrew nearly all the way before sliding slowly, inch by
torturous inch back in. "You're so tight and wet. So beautiful you
make me lose my mind."

Jane wanted to tell him he was beautiful too,
that he made her just as crazy. But her words were swallowed up on
a high, keening wail as he pressed his thumb against her clit. He
didn't even have to move; the firm, steady pressure combined with
the thrust and drag of his huge cock inside of her was enough to
send her over the edge.

She came so hard her vision went black,
starbursts of white exploding behind her eyelids as wave after wave
of pleasure rocketed through her. She drifted back to earth just in
time to hear his own harsh groan as he stiffened against her. To
her surprise, instead of holding himself deep inside her like he
usually did, he jerked away almost violently, grinding his hips
against the cushion as his body shuddered and shook.

It was only then that she realized what had
happened. "We forgot the condom," she said dazedly.

His head lifted and his gaze met hers. "I'm
sorry—that was totally careless of me."

"It was my fault too," she replied. "I wasn't
even thinking."

"You don't need to worry," Deck said as he
rolled to his side and pulled her against him. "I got a totally
clean bill of health at my last physical and haven't been with
anyone since. Well, except for you," he said with a half smile that
made her heart flutter inside her rib cage.

"Me too," she said softly. "I mean, I'm clean
and I've only been with you. You probably could have come inside me
and it wouldn't even matter. It's not like I can get pregnant or
anything."

She felt him stiffen beside her and
immediately regretted the words, then felt her stomach pitch at
what he said next. "I thought it was the staying pregnant, not the
getting pregnant that was the problem."

"Right," she said, blinking back the sudden
sting of tears and swallowing back the tightness in her throat.
You're insane,
she told herself harshly.
Completely
stupid.
Yet telling herself that couldn't banish the sudden
yawning ache inside her at the thought that she might never have a
baby.

And not just anybody's baby. Deck's baby.

God, you're just having sex. Amazing, over
the moon, beyond anything you ever imagined sex. But still. Sex. No
reason to jump to the part where you mourn the fact that you can't
have children together.

This thing with Deck was never about that -
anything approaching that. Somehow she managed to gather the shreds
of her composure together. "Sorry. It was a lame joke." She pressed
a smacking kiss to his lips. "In any case, nothing to worry about,"
she said with a lightheartedness she didn't feel.

She lay there against him for a few more
minutes before letting him coax her down to the beach for a swim.
For the next hour Jane laughed, splashed, and swam along beside
him. But even as she savored the sound of his deep laugh, the sight
of his smile, the feel of his wet, naked skin brushing against hers
in the water, she couldn't shake the heavy feeling burgeoning up
inside her.

The feeling that reality, which she was
trying so hard to keep at bay, was nipping at her heels. Coming for
them whether she was ready for it or not. And it when it caught up
to them, it wasn't going to be pretty.

"Come
on, put your shoulders into it," Deck called from the beach. He
stifled his laughter as Jane windmilled her kayak paddle and
managed to turn herself in a perfect, tight circle. Which would
have been great if she'd been practicing maneuvers rather than
trying to row into shore.

Finally she managed to steer her kayak into a
more or less straight direction and aim it back toward the beach.
"Just a little paddle," she muttered under her breath as he helped
her drag the fiberglass boat up onto the beach in front of her
house. "I didn't realize you were going to take me halfway to
Miami."

"It wasn't that bad," he said, giving her a
little swat on the ass she trudged past him. "Besides, it's good
exercise."

She paused and gave him a look over one bare,
tanned shoulder. "You implying that I need to work out?"

"It should be obvious at this point that I
don't find a single thing wrong with your body."

"The feeling's definitely mutual," she said,
running her admiring gaze over his bare torso. "Hold up—I want to
take a picture." She rummaged through the waterproof bag she'd
taken along on their excursion and pulled out her iPhone. "Hold the
paddle just like that—"

"I look like an idiot—"

"Shut up. You look hot. Now smile."

He shook his head and grinned gamely for the
camera for what felt like the dozenth time that day.

While Deck put the kayaks up Jane continued
tromping up the beach. "Where are you going?" he asked.

"I'm just going to change and get us
something to drink," she called as she continued up to the
flagstone patio.

"Don't take too long," he said before he
could stop himself. He winced inwardly, wondering if she'd picked
up the needy tone that managed to wheedle its way in there.

Jesus, what's wrong with you
? he
mentally scolded himself.
Acting like you can't stand to have
her out of your sight for even a few minutes.

He couldn't though, a condition that was even
more of a shock to his system than the realization that Jane's
vivid fantasies were all about him. It didn't make any sense. While
he wasn't anti-social by any means, Deck enjoyed his alone time,
which he chalked up to growing up in a house too small to contain
him and his oversize brothers, followed by years spent living in
remote barracks where privacy was the most precious commodity
around.

Now Deck coveted his time alone. When he
could read, watch TV, do whatever he wanted without having to see
anyone, talk to anyone, or otherwise worry about whether or not he
was doing something to piss someone off.

It had been an issue in every one of his
romantic relationships, his need for space, for quiet, for time
away.

But with Jane, it was like he couldn't get
enough. Not that it should surprise him. Even when she was supposed
to be just another client, he never wanted to leave. Never wanted
his time with her to end. At least, not until her then dear husband
came waltzing in, at which point Deck would feel like he was going
to crawl out of his skin if he didn't get away from both of
them.

And instead of going stir crazy this week,
confined to the house and the tiny island it sat on, Deck found
that he wanted to spend every minute, every second with her. It
wasn't all about the sex either, though he couldn't deny it had
been the week's highlight. But even when they weren't tearing each
other's clothes off, he liked looking at her across the breakfast
table, liked reaching over and holding her hand while they watched
a movie, liked popping his head up for air while swimming and
seeing her floating beside him.

For nearly a week, the only time he'd spent
alone since he'd arrived was working out in the gym or running laps
around the island while Jane lounged by the pool.

A situation that would have driven him
batshit with any other woman.

Better get used to being without her, seeing
as she's jetting back to L.A. in two days.

With that sobering thought in mind he trudged
back up to the patio. Jane was sitting under the umbrella on the
teak love seat. There were two tall cocktails and a tray of fruit
on the low table in front of her.

She'd slipped a gauzy peach colored dress
over her bikini. Her feet were propped up on the table, offering
him a mouth watering view of tanned, toned legs. Just then she
looked up and smiled and he nearly tripped over his own feet. With
her damp hair tumbling over her shoulders and her delicate-featured
face glowing from the sun, she was so damn pretty it made his
breath catch.

"I made margaritas," she said, sliding a
glass over to him. "Cheers."

Deck gamely clinked glasses and smiled as she
held her phone up to snap yet another photo.

"I want to get one of the two of us," she
said, snuggling into his shoulder as she held the phone out in
front of them. "Say cheers," she said and held up her drink.

He played along and took a sip of the drink,
savoring the sweet and sour tang enhanced by the light dusting of
salt on the rim. "You know, for someone who's usually ducking the
paparazzi, you've gotten mighty snap happy the past couple of
days."

"I'm sorry, is it annoying?" She set down the
camera and turned to him, genuine concern clouding her wide green
eyes. "Of all people I know how obnoxious it can be to have someone
shoving a camera in your face. It's just..."

Her voice trailed off.

"What?"

She scooted a few inches away, perched on the
edge of the love seat as she took a long sip of her drink. "I just
want to make sure I remember everything, you know? And these
pictures, no one else will see them. They're just for me. I wanted
to have something from this that's... just for me."

She turned to face him then, and though her
mouth was smiling her eyes were suspiciously shiny. "I've never had
anything like this, where I was completely alone with someone, no
distractions, no worries about photographers popping up around
every corner. This week with you"—she swallowed hard, and as she
reached out to take his hand, he felt a lump form in his own
throat—"has been incredible."

His fingers unconsciously tightened around
hers. "The best week of my life," he said before he could stop
himself.

'Really?" her gaze snapped back to his, a
look of startled delight in her eyes.

"Yeah, really."

"Me too," she said with a heavy sigh, her
shoulders slumping as if in defeat.

"Why do you sound so depressed about it
then?"

"Because it can't last."

Deck's stomach clenched in protest. Even
though he'd been bracing himself for this all week, it still felt
like a punch to the gut.

"I mean, once we get back, everything will
change. I have to be in Vancouver for six weeks, you'll be on set
in L.A., we'll have to work out travel. And that's not even
considering the press..."

He was so busy bracing himself to get his
heart nuked that it took several beats for his brain to register
what she was saying. "Back up a sec," he said with a little shake
of his head. "You're saying you want to keep seeing each other even
after we leave here?"

She jerked her hand from his and her mouth
opened and closed a few times before she spoke. "I, uh, I mean, not
if you're not interested. I totally get it if you just want what
happens at the Shack to stay at the Shack-"

Deck wrapped his hand around the nape of her
neck and silenced her by covering her mouth with his. Her lips
parted on a startled gasp, and as a wave of happy relief rushed
through him, he wondered at how a woman who was widely recognized
as one of the sexiest, most desirable women in the world could
possibly doubt he wanted to be with her. He decided to spell it out
just to be sure. "You really think after the week we've spent here,
I wouldn't be interested?"

Her laugh sent a puff of warm air over his
lips and he felt her slender shoulder shrug. "I figure I can't
assume anything."

"I think it's safe to assume I want to be
with you."

Jane's expression grew serious again. "You
say that now, but everything will be different when we leave here.
You know this isn't what my life is like. For Christ's sake, this
isn't even what
I'm
like. And you'll have to deal with the
press, what they'll say about us, what they'll say about you—"