Prince of Shadows (18 page)

Cale glanced at her, just for an instant, but she knew that anguished stare. She remembered it as if she were even now peering terrified through the slats in her parents’ closet door into his huge glazed eyes. The strong scent of cedar that had permeated that small, dark place filled her nose, swirling in sickening accompaniment to her mother’s favorite perfume. She had to look away as nausea threatened. Because of him . . .

He’d said enough. More than enough. Cale gripped his cup and, without another word, carried it into the kitchen. The sight of his mother seated at the table, her face wet with tears, stopped him like a high-powered bullet. She’d heard everything.

“You did it for me. To protect me. All these years I thought it was because you wanted that life, because you wanted to step into his shoes. Why didn’t you tell me?”

He knelt beside her chair, clutching her cold hands in his. “What would you have done if I’d come to you, Momma? You would have confronted him, and he would have—” Cale took a quick gulping breath. “I didn’t do it so I could be him. I did it so I could stop him. And that’s what I’m going to do. I’m strong enough now, and there’s nothing he can do to hurt me except through you and Kendra. If anything happens to either of you, I’ll just fucking die.”

He laid his head on her shoulder and lost himself in her embrace, smiling slightly when she murmured, “Watch your language in my house.”

“I love you, Momma.”

She stroked his hair gently. “And Kendra? Are the two of you together now?”

“I don’t know what we are.”

“She called, scared out of her mind, came all the way out here in the middle of the night. She never said what happened, only that she’d done something she was sorry for.”

He didn’t want to hear about Kendra. He didn’t want to think about her or look at her. Suddenly, he was aware that the scent of them together was all over him. A reminder of what she was willing to sacrifice for those she
did
love.

Had she taken that call from Silas? He was afraid to ask. Afraid of what she would . . . or wouldn’t tell him.

“I’m going to take a shower, and then I’ve got to go.”

“Is Kendra going with you?”

“Only if I can’t stop her.”

The last thing Kendra wanted to do was return to the Terriot compound. If there were a way to remain in the peaceful embrace of Vera’s home, she would have chosen to walk barefoot on these warm tiled floors, to rinse dishes looking out over the manicured lawns, to stretch out on comfy patio furniture and fall asleep with a book on her lap. Relaxed, normal things that hadn’t been a part of her life in years and years. She would have given up everything for this selfish slice of serenity . . . everything except Cale.

He was going back, so she would go with him. She couldn’t let him leave alone with that haunted, hollow look in his eyes that had been there the first time she met him, that empty look of being crushed and discarded. She’d hated his family for that then, and she hated herself for it now.

She glanced up when his mother joined her.

“There’s something I should show you,” Vera began carefully, her gaze on the hallway in case Cale should appear. “I’ve never told him. I didn’t want him to know. I wanted him to be able to make his own choices, but now he may not have one.”

Slowly, she reached for the neckline of her sweater and drew it aside. Kendra gasped at the sight of the deep grooved scars. The sign of her bonding with a Shifter male.

“Of all his many mates, I’m the one Bram Terriot chose. Cale is his undisputed heir. He was a different man then, Cale’s father. He was strong and hard, though he could be kind, too. That changed after Cale was born. He became someone I didn’t know, someone I was afraid of, suspicious of everything I did, not trusting anything I said. But he loved Cale.”

The first thing that surfaced in Kendra was anger. “You let your son struggle and live in fear, be beaten nearly to death time and time again, when he had
nothing
to prove?”

Her outrage shamed the other woman, but only briefly. Vera’s expression firmed with a conviction Kendra didn’t know if she’d ever have the courage to maintain. “I did what I thought best for him. He wouldn’t leave with me. He was just a little boy, no match for the rest of them. I thought he’d be safer without becoming a target. They would have found a way to kill him if they thought he was a threat. I wanted to protect him. And I wanted him to think he was free to leave, to come back to me. He never did.” She drew a shaky breath and brushed at her eyes before continuing. “Bram promised me he’d be taken care of, that I’d have no reason to worry. We agreed that he wouldn’t be told about us. I think Bram was certain Cale would disappoint him, and then he’d be able to pass his crown to one of the more deserving others. I prayed that would happen. I prayed every night for my son to fail. I had no idea what he was going through. He never said a word to me, and then I didn’t want to know. I couldn’t bear to know because there was nothing I could do for him. I let that monster hurt my baby after he promised to keep him safe. What kind of mother lets that happen to her child?”

Kendra placed a hand on Vera’s arm for a squeeze. “You both underestimated him. He must have gotten that determination and strength from you, to make you proud.”

Vera smiled slightly. “No. If he’s been pushing himself to succeed all this time, it wasn’t for me, for his father’s attention, or for the throne. It was so he’d feel worthy of you.”

That was what Tony had said and Cale had confirmed with his own words. The weight of it hung upon her heart.

Vera opened a drawer beneath that photo shrine and passed Kendra another picture, probably the first taken that day she and Cale had arrived together. He had his head turned away from the lens, his face angled so he could look over at Kendra with such aching anguish.
Oh, Cale, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know.

And then Kendra studied herself in that telling photo, and what she saw shocked her. Tenderness softened her features, making her eyes dewy and her lips slightly part. Her arms were around him in a gesture that was sheltering as well as supportive.

She’d never fallen out of love with her Terriot prince.

Vera pressed her hand and left her to her thoughts.

Why hadn’t she realized it sooner? How had it come as such a surprise?
I love you, Katy. I’ve loved you forever.

Of course she’d known. She’d always known. That was why his sudden abandonment had broken her heart. Why she hadn’t looked at her phone to see who was calling.

Kendra picked up the blanket he’d let drop to the floor and held it to her face, inhaling his scent, aroused by the fact that hers entwined with it for a deliciously earthy fragrance. An unrealized instinct stirred deep inside her with a fierce, lusty growl.
He’s yours. Take him.

Agitated by those compelling urges, she paced the small cozy living room, wanting desperately to hide within its safety. Why was she even considering going back to that place of pain and fear and isolation? Let him take care of his family’s politics, let him assume that role he so desired. She’d only get in his way, handicapping him with his worry over her.

And then all she could see was the look on his face when he’d noticed her at the Shifter arena.

You’re still here.

Amazed, humbled, because no one had ever chosen to be by his side. Until now. Until her.

Cale emerged from the hallway, showered and dressed in the clingy gray sweater she’d brought for him, the floral trace of soap and shampoo a glaring contrast to his rough masculinity. He regarded her briefly, unblinkingly, then turned to his mother. “Gotta go.” He relaxed into her embrace. “Call me if you need me. Even if you don’t.”

She kissed his cheek, promising, “I will. Stay safe.”

By then Kendra had her coat on and was waiting at the door. He said nothing as he put on his own jacket and strode past her out into the bright late morning, leaving her to follow.

eighteen

They wound up into the mountains, sparse scrub replaced by lush pines, the air cooling as Kendra’s temperature grew hot.

It was the feel of Cale between her knees.

She was in love with him.

Her palms clutched the tops of his hard thighs, her thumbs buried in the crease of his jeans as the bike’s vibrations echoed to her core.

He’s yours. Yours to have. Yours to enjoy. What are you waiting for? You know you want him.

Her need grew as sharp as the cutting wind.

The road narrowed into a winding two-lane, a sheer drop-off on one side, thick forest on the other. As they rounded a curve, Kendra tapped Cale’s helmet and gestured to a two-track veering deep into the trees between dirty piles of leftover early snow. He downshifted and guided them onto that bumpy path until they were well out of sight of any passersby.

He straddled the motorcycle, keeping it at an idle while she slipped from the seat, then he lifted off his helmet as she did the same. His expression was tight and controlled as he raked his fingers through his hair and gave his shoulders a roll.

“Aren’t you coming with me?” she asked.

He frowned at her. “You don’t need me with you to pee.”

“No, but I need you with me to have sex.”

She turned and started into the woods, not exhaling until she heard him shut off the engine.

Scant sunlight penetrated the canopy of firs. The partially frozen ground was springy with needles. So deep and quiet. And then he was behind her, his hands at her waist, his breath pulsing hot against her ear. She revolved in his grasp, at first startled by the intensity of his features, then so unbearably thrilled that she stretched up for his lips. His head tilted back so that her eager mouth caught his jaw. She kissed her way along that harsh line, moving down to the heat of his throat, an urgent moan rising in her own.

She yanked open his coat and pushed it off his shoulders, then reached for the fastening to his jeans, pulling roughly at the zipper until he intercepted her for his own safety. The instant he freed himself, her hands were on him, stroking, tugging, while he backed her up against the trunk of a massive pine. He didn’t ask if she was sure. He didn’t ask if she was ready. He took those things for granted from the way she kicked off her shoes and wriggled out of her leggings.

The kiss of cool mountain air on her bare legs made her all the more aware of the heat bubbling over at their junction. His hands clamped on to her thighs, lifting her so her knees hooked over his hip bones to hug him tight between them. She had his face clasped in her palms, wanting his mouth so desperately, but he ducked his head, resting his brow on her shoulder.

And then she wasn’t thinking about kissing.

One hard thrust buried him deep inside her, forcing the breath from her lungs with a shocked oomph. Then pain, burning, splintering, splitting pain that brought tears to her eyes and had her biting her lip to contain the cry. Her nails sank into his neck and shoulder as he began to move in swift, powerful lunges. She clung to him, shaking, about to beg him to stop, when the discomfort eased, then expanded into something very different. Something amazing.

Kendra arched into him, encouraging him to pull her closer, to reach deeper, now begging him to meet and satisfy the raw need clawing through her for something just out of reach. And she was there, one instant on the agonizing edge, then tumbling, falling hard and fast to shatter into bliss.

She was still panting wildly through those savage shudders when Cale took her down to the forest floor on hands and knees, where he planted himself deep and continued that hard, pounding rhythm. His hands were on her shoulders, holding her still to receive him. That grip tightened, sharpened, piercing tender skin as he began to transform. Harsh breaths lowered into a preternatural rumbling against the back of her neck. She felt his body alter in shape and size, bulking up, growing thicker, more powerful. The drawing, stretching pain returned, but it wasn’t more than she could stand to have this, to have him.

The force of his aggressive strokes knocked her down onto her forearms, her face close to the scent of loamy earth that made her remember the garden shed as her fingers dug deep in the cool soil. Her body began a helpless, urgent trembling.

Cale’s huge hand tangled in her hair, twisting it away from where he would mark her. There was no panic now, just a frantic sense of need.
Yes! Do it now! Cale, do it now! Make me yours.
Climax hit so sudden and strong that it tore a keening cry from Kendra. And as her body clutched and spasmed, she heard Cale’s roar of frustration trickle down into deep, satisfied groans as he came spontaneously, endlessly, within her. His grip lessened as he sagged over her back, hoarse breaths scorching unbroken skin until he resumed his regular form.

Then, without a word, he withdrew from her and stood to restore his jeans, pick up his jacket . . . and walk back to where they’d parked, leaving her shivering and gasping on the ground. Mated but not yet marked.

It hit her then as an achy exhaustion settled in.

Sizzle. Boom. Done.

No kisses. No tender words. No lingering touch.

In a daze, Kendra cleaned herself as best she could with her wadded underwear, dressed, and tottered to where Cale waited, bike purring, helmeted head turned toward the road. She could tell he was aware of her approach by the stiffening of his posture, but he didn’t acknowledge her.

Her first coherent thought was to grab something to hit him with while she screamed and sobbed for him to take him back to that peaceful condo and never, ever come back for her. But she didn’t. She climbed on behind him, making as little contact as possible, as they sped toward her elegant prison.

Tony was waiting on the front steps for them. Kendra hurried past him into the house while Cale lingered to receive news he didn’t want to hear.

Tony looked after Kendra’s rapidly disappearing figure, then frowned at Cale. “Is she all right?”

“She’s my concern, not yours,” Cale responded in a curt voice. To the shrewd insight in the other man’s eyes, his narrowed glare conveyed,
Mind your own damned business.
“What’s going on?”

“Meeting up at the lodge in five. Was afraid you weren’t gonna be back in time.” He shook his head before Cale could ask. “Didn’t say what it was about.”

Cale’s intention to grab a quick shower was interrupted by the sight of Kendra in the bathroom. She stood before the mirror, wearing only her bra. The tender flesh of her arms and shoulders was marred by telling bruises and scratches but not by the sign of permanent possession. Smears of dried blood streaked her inner thighs.

His mate.

This wasn’t what he’d planned. Not this way. Cale took a step forward, needing to hold her close, desperate to speak quiet words to express the cherished importance of what had happened between them. His regret, his gratitude, his deep though shaken devotion.

Their gazes met, first in the reflective glass, then, as she turned toward him, her stare as bruised as her body.

He would crawl if he had to in order to erase that anguish.

“Kendra,” he began.

And that damning buzz sounded from the bag resting beside her on the sink. Her gaze widened with dismay before darting guiltily to the case.

In a fierce movement, Cale brushed her aside and tore open the bag, keeping her back with the brace of his forearm as he came up with her phone to answer it. “What do you want?” he snarled.

Silence, then a cold “Who is this?”

Cale’s tone lowered into a deadly rumble. “She can’t come to the phone. Not now, not ever. Don’t call again.”

“Cale?” He could hear a quickly drawn breath, followed by a blunt warning: “Tell her I’m on my way. Get ready.”

With a furious yell, Cale smashed the phone to the tiled floor and crushed it beneath his heel. Then he turned to Kendra, not looking for an answer—he already had that—but to tell her succinctly, “Don’t bother to pack. You’re not going anywhere.”

He left her without any other explanation, slamming out the front door, pausing only briefly to tell Tony, “She doesn’t leave here,” before jogging up to the lodge.

His father and his immaculately dressed brothers were seated in the great hall. All eyes were on him as he strode across the room like a brawler, clothing rumpled, smelling of rage and feral sex. His brothers took in the scratches on his neck and his raw temper and smirked knowingly. Cale Terriot was a mated man.

“MacCreedy’s on his way,” Cale announced without preamble.

Bram regarded him narrowly. “Since you’re already late, you might have put some thought into looking presentable.”

“I’m not late,” Cale snapped back, earning some raised brows from his siblings. “I’ve been finishing other business you sent me to attend to. What are we going to do about MacCreedy?”

“Sit down.”

Contrarily, Cale bypassed the cluster of chairs to stand at the window, balled fists resting against the cool glass, back to the others. His breathing, his thoughts, his mood were ungoverned, and for the moment he didn’t care.

“How did you hear of it?” Bram asked, his voice terse.

“He’s been trying to reach my mate.” Again that blinding fury surged in Cale, to think that another would intrude between him and his female. Especially this dangerous other. “I just spoke to him. When he gets here, I’m going to kill him.”

“That’s not going to happen.” When Cale whirled toward him, Bram amended coolly, “At least not right away.”

“Why not?”

“Back down your attitude, boy, or it’ll be done for you.”

Cale took a deep breath and managed a rigid outward stance. Inside, he was shaking apart, his restraint weakened by stress cracks. He couldn’t force an apology, but Bram seemed to accept his silence as a sign of obedience.

“I’ve spoken to MacCreedy myself.”

Cale’s attention snapped taut. “When?”

“This morning. He’s on his way here at my invitation, so you will do nothing without my instructions. Is that clear?”

Cale swallowed hard and managed a strained “Yes, my king” through gritted teeth.

“It seems our men got tangled up in some local difficulties. Davis had the bad fortune to fall into their hands alive. MacCreedy is bringing him back to us. I believe he expects an apology and perhaps some concessions.”

Cale’s blood went cold. Kendra. Silas was coming here to demand his cousin in exchange for continued peace between them.

Over his dead body!

“What are we going to do?” he asked in an unemotional tone.

“That depends on you and what you’re willing to surrender.”

“I surrender nothing. He won’t take what belongs to me.”

Those arrogant words struck against the wall of fear surrounding his heart but scarcely made a dent. All the posturing sentiments in the world couldn’t overcome the cold panic of losing her. Because Kendra’s vow wasn’t born of love. It was forged by desperation. And now she had another option in play.

Knowing that, he’d fiercely placed his claim upon her, within her, to take what he hadn’t earned. He was a Terriot, so he held tight to what he’d managed to acquire, though it wasn’t truly his. That truth undercut his confidence with shame. Because he was too weak to let her go, to trust her to choose.

“I can’t demand that my clan stand behind my rights, but I’ll fight to the death to protect them.” Because he was a prince in the House of Terriot, and he didn’t surrender.

There was movement off to the side. Turow rose from his seat. “I’ll stand with you, brother.”

Before Cale could express surprise, Colin and Kip also stood.

“I’m in,” Rico announced, pushing at Adam and Lee on either side of him to get them to rise as well.

Slowly, Wesley got to his feet, then James and Stephen.

Bram surveyed the united front made by his sons with a touch of uneasiness rather than pride. “Sit down, all of you. No need for dramatics. Our House allows no transgressions against one of our own. You insult us to expect less, Cale.”

Cale turned a humbled face to his brothers as he muttered, “I spoke foolishly.” Then he added, “And I thank you.”

“We’ll hear what MacCreedy has to say and discuss whatever he suggests before I make a decision. Is that understood?”

“Yes, my king.”

“No one acts on his own when those actions affect us all. Is that clear?”

“Yes, my king.”

Talk turned to matters of readiness in case things soured with MacCreedy, giving Cale time to consider his bold words.

How was he going to hold on to a woman who didn’t want him and had lied about her desire to share his life? By locking her in their rooms under guard? By keeping her under his constant surveillance? By beating all thoughts of betrayal out of her, as his father would have?

Kendra would never make a rash move to endanger their position, if not to save him, then to save her cousin—or whatever else he might be to her. She was smart, used to protecting those she cared about. Or so Cale believed until he glanced up and saw her trying to force her way into the room.