Possession (4 page)

“Who?” There was someone else I knew here, someone
who wanted to see me? I searched my mind, trying to force my way through the
fog that hid my past—but all that happened was my temples began to throb
again. I looked at Mildred, struggling not to look as confused as I felt. I
obviously failed.

She giggled. “Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten about
your lover boy.
Roses are red and violets
are blue, sugar is sweet and so are you.
” She cocked her head to the side
and swayed a bit as though listening to music. Her eyes focused back on me.
“You know, the one who only comes out during the
witching hour? Electroshock really does a number on your system.” She reached
down and grabbed my arm. “Come on, we have to hurry. The orderlies will be more
active soon, once they’re done napping.”

I reluctantly got out of bed, shivering as my bare
feet hit the cold floor. I wrapped my arms around my body. Despite the chill, I
felt stronger now. Whatever drug they gave me had finally worn off.

“You get used to the cold after a while. Maybe
you’d better put on a robe. They keep extras in the second dresser drawer. It’s
a lot colder on the other side of the hospital, though I don’t know why. The
whole place runs on the same heating system. It doesn’t really make a lot of
sense to have it colder over there, does it?”

I pulled a robe from the dresser and put it on. It
was blue like hers, but mine hung all the way down past my knees. “Where are we
going?”

She ignored my question and started walking out of
the room. “Come on,” she urged.

She turned the corner, heading into the darkened
maze of the hospital. I steeled myself against the sudden chill and rushed to
catch up. I didn’t want to risk getting lost in this creepy place. When we got
to the next set of doors, Mildred raised one finger to her lips. She took the
key chain out of her pocket, put a key in the lock, and slowly turned it. The
door squeaked a bit as she opened it and I held my breath.

What’ll happen
if they find me traipsing around in the middle of the night?
I wasn’t sure,
but I was betting the penalty would be something worse than a shot of knockout
drugs.

We crept along the next hallway until Mildred stopped
at an open door. She peered in and I looked over her shoulder. An orderly in a
white uniform had his feet up on the desk. He was leaned back in his chair with
his eyes closed. Snoring sounds floated out of his mouth.

She smiled and motioned for me to follow. I
hustled as quickly as possible while trying to keep quiet. Mildred, on the
other hand, just strode through like she thought she was invisible. The
orderly’s snores faded away behind us as we made several quick turns.

I was already lost. The place was eerily silent at
night. The building was a warren of confused spaces, and every time I looked
back the way we had come, I had trouble recognizing any landmarks. It was as if
the building was subtly changing whenever I looked away. It must have been a
product of my still-partially-drugged mind.

I wondered at my own sanity, following some old
woman through an insane asylum. Where is she leading me? Is she violent? Is this
some kind of ruse to get me off on my own so she can bludgeon me to death?

I was starting to seriously regret following Mildred
and was thinking up excuses for heading back to my room, but before I could say
anything, she walked over to the closest door and opened it. “I told you I
would bring her.”

I followed her in. It was Dean. The catatonic guy
was sitting in the middle of the room in a wheelchair. But…he was no longer
comatose—his expression wasn’t slack. His eyes glowed when he saw me. He
slowly lifted himself out of the chair and took a wobbly step forward. He
reached out. “Colina, I’ve been so worried about you. Thank the Goddess you’re
here, and you’re safe.”

His voice…it’s the one that’s been haunting my
dreams!

I took a step closer. Those eyes staring at me
were no longer blue—they were dark gray and full of emotion. Something
inside of me responded to him. Looking into his eyes, hearing him call my name…
Suddenly the fog in my head lifted, and I remembered.

I remembered everything.

Memories flooded back. The three horrifying trials
I had to endure to become a death dealer. First, the awakening: Luke’s hands
strangling me, and then, with his help, coming back from death. Then, the
possession: the night Luke tied me to a
chair,
and Wanda’s spirit possessed me. And then…Anna’s death.

I had taken the life of a child on her deathbed.

I still flinched away from that memory.
The rational part of me knew it wasn’t murder—it
was mercy. Helping a sick child to the other side. But the shredded remnants of
the healer I had once been quelled in horror at the memory of taking another’s
life.

But that wasn’t the only life I’d taken. I’d
brutally killed one of
Macaven’s
men,
and I’d been responsible that night for
the deaths of countless others.

I found the men responsible for my family’s death.
I made them pay for what they did, but my revenge had come with a price. I’d
released a demon into the world. A demon that killed without remorse and had
escaped to do who knows what. And Luke—he’d died. I’d seen his body
crushed under the weight of a stone
altar
.
He’d been dead…but now he lived.

I remember. I had successfully performed the spell
that helped Luke possess Dean’s body, and now he walked this earth again by my
side.

Memories rushed over
me, a flow of lost time trying to force itself into my mind all at once and
almost drowning me in its intensity. My temples
throbbed with the strain of so much information crashing over me. I
struggled for a long moment against the painful rush of memories, but then I
stopped struggling and just let myself drift with the flow.

It
hadn’t been easy trying to find someone to teach me. I couldn’t walk right up
to another guild or stumble into a magic shop and ask the proprietor for help.
I went to the only person I could think of—the old gypsy who’d helped
Luke when he’d been stabbed.

When I
stumbled
into her shop,
she hadn’t been
surprised to see me. She stood in the middle of that little room, between the
zebra rug and striped chair, which still gave the shop its Old World feel. She
still wore a wide skirt and a bohemian blouse, but this time
her
outfit was all blue. The scarf sweeping up
her dark hair was a vivid green. When she saw me,
she gestured for me to follow her through a doorway that was covered, not with
a door, but a curtain of beads.

I felt an odd sort of déjà vu, as if I was both
drowning in a memory and experiencing it for the first time. It was the second time
I’d gone looking for a teacher in order to learn something that I was better
off not knowing.

But I couldn’t—wouldn’t—let Luke
go, no matter the cost.

The memories continued to rush in.

*
* *

The gypsy’s living
space
sat on the other side of the
beaded curtain. A small living room and kitchen made up the room. In the middle
was a wooden table with two place settings. She gave me a knowing smile and
pointed to the nearest chair. “Sit. We’ll eat. You are hungry, tired.” Her eyes
filled with something I hadn’t seen a lot
of lately
—
empathy.

I ate the stew she put in front of me. It
was full of meat and potatoes. I wasn’t hungry, but I forced myself to eat
,
one spoonful at a time. I tried to will
away my anxiety with little success. This woman had powers I didn’t understand.
She was obviously some kind of seer. She saw things—things that she had
tried to warn me about before. She had foreseen the awakening, had tried to
warn me about the darkness that would consume me. I’d faced her before, but I had
Luke’s strength and confidence to draw on then. This time I was all alone. Except
…
“I’m here,” a ghostly voice whispered
in my ear, and I felt a soft touch graze
against my hand. His presence gave me strength, and I squared my shoulders to
face her.

The gypsy let out a long sigh. “So it’s
true. The boy’s spirit still lingers. You won’t let him cross over.”

She had felt his presence. Like Darla, she
was blaming me for not allowing him to cross over. My face grew hot, and there
were tears in my eyes when I answered, “I’m not forcing him to stay.”

“But you are. Your heart and mind are filled
to the brim with him. That love shining in
you is like a light cast in a dark room. It draws him to you. It keeps him from
moving on.”

I pushed the bowl away and started to get up
from the table. Despair filled me. I had come looking for help, but if the
gypsy had decided that what I was doing was wrong, then asking for her help was
pointless. “If you won’t help me, I’ll find someone who will. I won’t give up
on him.”

Her withered hands reached out and grasped
my arm. She was stronger than she looked. “And where are you planning to go?”

I looked into her eyes, expecting to see
contempt, but there was only sadness and pity. I didn’t bother to brush away
the tears sliding down my cheeks. I had nowhere else to turn—and she knew
it. “I need your help.”

She let go of me and leaned back in her
chair.

“I can pay.” I pulled a small bag of gold
coins from my pocket and pushed it toward her. Freddy had lent me the money.

Freddy, the non-mage-born boy who was raised
with Luke, and who Luke considered a brother. He was Luke’s confidante, his closest
friend… Freddy was the only one I could go to—the only one I could
speak
to—after Luke’s funeral.
Darla, Luke’s sister, had found me on the hilltop overlooking the funeral. She
blamed me for her brother’s death. She swore to see me dead for what I’d done.

If Freddy thought
my request for coins was odd, he hadn’t shown it. He’d given the money to me
without hesitation
,
even though I never
told him what it was really for. I figured he thought I needed it because I
wanted to make a getaway. He knew Luke’s guild was hunting me.

The real reason I needed gold coins was because
gypsy tradition demanded that payments be made in gold or silver. My mama
taught me that it was a tradition passed through gypsy history—when
nomadic gypsy groups frequently crossed over international boundaries, banks
had not welcomed their business. Gold and silver were the only truly universal
currency. That’s how the gypsy culture kept its freedom.

The gypsy woman’s eyes were boring into me.
She sat there, staring at me silently for a long moment before she sighed again
and finally spoke
.
“It’s foolish,
what you are planning.”

I didn’t ask how she knew what I was
thinking. I didn’t bother to defend myself. “I have to bring him back.”

She shook her head. “I know I can’t talk you out of it. You’re going to try and do it
no matter what I say.” She reached out and grabbed a glass bottle filled with
amber liquid. She poured it into a glass and then drank all of it down. “What
is it you need from me?”

It surprised me that she didn’t know. She’d
known I was coming, she knew what I was planning… She couldn’t put the pieces
together? I was going to try and find a body to put Luke’s spirit in.

Bring
Luke back.

It was a thought that never left me. A thought that consumed my days and nights. I
would not rest until I saved Luke.

“I need someone who can teach me a spell to
put his spirit into a new body,” I said.

“Even though the boy’s guild hunts you.” It
wasn’t a question.

“They blame me for his death. They want
their revenge.” What I didn’t say out loud was
, They’re right. It’s my fault that Luke is dead. If I’d been thinking…
If I had just waited…

“Do you know they almost found you twice? Even
now they are making their way here.”

I pushed away from the table. My head
swerved toward the door. Panic filled me. Any minute the Phoenix Guild could
burst in, capture me, and ruin all my plans.

“There is time, little one.” She got up and
walked over to a small wooden desk pushed against a wall. She opened a drawer, pulled
out a piece of paper, and held it out for me to take.

I reached for it, but she pulled the paper back before I could touch it. “Are you
sure this is the path you wish to take? There will be consequences for your
actions.” Her eyes were kind, but sad, as if she already knew how I would
answer the question.

I was already living with the consequences
of what I’d done. I’d raised a demon. I’d
let an evil creature loose on the world. I’d foolishly rushed in and took on
Macaven and because of it, Luke was dead, his
spirit floating in the in between. But for how long would he be able to
hold onto the shreds of his spirit and remain in between? How long until the
light called to him and he passed over? I had to find a way to bring him back
before that happened.

“I know what I’m doing.” Even as I said the
words, I knew I didn’t believe them.

She gave me a long look and then handed me
the paper. On it was a name and address. I
looked into her eyes, trying to find the words to thank her, but they froze on
my lips. Her expression was one of resignation and disapproval. She was helping
me, but she didn’t approve of what I wanted to do.
So why did you help me at all?
I wondered, looking into the old
woman’s face. She could have turned me away. Could have told the Phoenix Guild
I was coming since she had been expecting me. She was risking a lot to help me. More than the few coins I paid
her could justify. I was still no closer to understanding the woman.

Without another word, I turned and walked
out of the room. She didn’t try to stop me, and there were no last
-
minute words of warning or advice like
the last time I’d rushed out of her shop.

Outside, I wiped away a tear sliding down my
cheek and looked up into the clear blue sky. The sun was shining, and people were walking down the
streets, going in and out of shops. Life was going on. Before this moment, my
life had been on hold.

Now it had a purpose
again.

I was so close to getting what I wanted most
in the world. I looked down at the paper I held tightly between my fingers.
This piece of paper was the key to bringing Luke back.

*
* *

The rush of memories
pushed me forward again—drawing me on past the details of meals eaten and
miles walked to the important things I had to know—in a painful blur. A
harsh voice echoed in the distant recesses of my mind, and its cruel push drove
me mercilessly onward. “Remember,” it said, and I did…

*
* *

“Are you the girl I’ve
heard people buzzing about?” The man was old, maybe sixty or seventy. His hair
was white and his shoulders stooped slightly, but there was strength in his
eyes.

He
hadn’t asked me any questions when he first answered the door. I’d handed over
the gypsy’s slip of paper, and he’d
welcomed me in. It wasn’t until I was seated on a worn brown couch surrounded
by stacks of books that he asked the question. I stuttered, nervous that he
might throw me out if he knew who I really was. “W-what if I am?”

“I
would tell you I’m curious. There are wild stories circulating about the magic
you possess. Is all of it true?” he asked, peering at me, brown eyes full of
curiosity.

“I can
raise the dead,” I said. It was the first time I’d said it out loud, the first
time I’d told a stranger, and it felt wrong. Was I making a huge mistake coming
here?
You have no other choice
, I
reminded myself.

His
eyes widened at my words.

“I can
cross over spirits who are stuck in between—spirits who don’t want to go.”

He
moved a pile of books off the couch and sat down next to me. “Ahh, now that is a skill I would truly give anything for.
So much of our magic has no value, but crossing over stuck spirits—”

“I need
your help.”

His
expression changed to annoyance. “I gathered as much. Why else would you be
here bothering me?”

My
stomach twisted with anxiety. What if he refused me? There was no place else
for me to go. He was the only one who could help me. “I need you to teach me
some magic.”

He
looked suddenly cautious. “What kind of magic
does the raiser of demons and zombies need from the likes of me?”

“I need
to bring a spirit back.”

“Back?”
He looked confused. “From heaven? From hell? Such a thing
might
be possible. I’ve heard rumors and whispers, but it’s blasphemy—”

I
interrupted him. “No, I want to bring a spirit that is
in between
into another living body.” My words rushed out. “I’ve
been told it works if the body is no longer…occupied—someone in a coma,
or someone who’s not in their right mind.”

His
eyes narrowed. “How much are you willing to pay for such training?”

I had
given half my money to the gypsy. I held out a small bag. “I have some money.”

“You
want me to teach you forbidden magic and you have ‘some money’?” He got up from
the couch and looked down at me, dismissive impatience in his eyes and body
language. “The risk is too great.” He started to walk away.

“But you
said my magic has value.”

He
stopped and turned back. “I did. Yes, I did. Maybe we can come to some kind of
agreement. But I’ve heard stories. Aren’t there people after you?”

“There
are.” I knew that there was no hope of hiding it. I was being hunted
,
and I wasn’t sure what would happen if
the Phoenix Guild caught up to me. But I was sure that those caught helping me
would be in their own mess of trouble. Could I convince the old man it was
worth it? A flush of panic ran through me, but I tried to keep my feelings from
showing.

He
leaned in and peered into my face. “So you
are
a fugitive.”

“Some
members of the Phoenix Guild are…unhappy with me,” I admitted, red-faced.

He
snorted. “
Some
money,
some
members… Do you realize how powerful
the Phoenix Guild is?”

I had
to show him I was strong. That I was set on this course and would do whatever I
had to
see it through. I tried to
sound confident. “I can deal with Luke’s family if they ever catch up with me.
I’m sure I can come to an arrangement—
if
Luke is here with me when they come.”

He
shook his head and gave a small smile. “I have some business up north. We could
travel together. I think I can find a way to use your skills. But the type of
training you’re talking about will not be easy. I’m a death dealer, but I no
longer belong to any guild. Guild rules don’t
interest me anymore. I’ve been on my own for twenty years, and I like it that way. I like answering to no one.” He squinted
over at me. “If they find me harboring you, I can protect myself, but I won’t
be able to protect you. I’ve been free of their politics for years. But
you—if they catch you, you know what can happen.”