Poison Heart (28 page)

‘Wow … what a transformation. You look fabulous.’

‘We’re having a kind of dress rehearsal for the ball.’

Mum’s face was still drawn, but she made an effort to look pleased for me. ‘That’ll be fun … I’m sure I have a pair of long gloves somewhere.’

I clapped my hands in excitement. ‘Can you dig them out? And please can you show me how to do my hair in a French pleat that screams elegant and sophisticated rather than frizzy and flyaway?’

Mum found the gloves easily and a pair of black satin slingback shoes with a kitten heel, plus a great string of fake pearls and some dangly earrings to match. I changed back into my jeans and put the dress into a bag, ready to take with me. Mum went upstairs again and returned with a bag full of clips, slides, combs and hairspray and spent ages teasing my thick wavy hair into something vaguely resembling Audrey Hepburn’s in
Breakfast at Tiffany’s
, one of her favourite movies.

‘You know … since this girl, Genevieve, came along,’ she began tentatively, ‘things have changed, haven’t they?’

‘Suppose,’ I grunted, wincing as my head was yanked to the left.

‘You seem more confident … less the …’

‘Doormat?’

‘No, that’s not the word I’m looking for,’ Mum scolded. ‘More your own person.’

‘Maybe,’ I agreed.

‘Things have changed with me too.’

‘Have they?’

Mum’s nimble fingers brushed my neck. ‘I’ve realized you’re almost an adult and soon you’ll be making your own way. Going away to uni maybe.’

‘I did think about it. The best degree course for me is probably in London.’

‘Well, Katy, I’ve had you to myself for so long it’s time I let you go.’

She spoke without a trace of self-pity, which was unusual. A seagull squawked overhead, making me start. Through the window, I watched it spread its wings and soar into the white winter sky. It almost seemed like a sign that Mum was ready to set me free to make my own way.

‘You’re not a child any more and I have to make a life for myself so … Genevieve’s influence hasn’t been
all
bad.’

‘Not sure about that,’ I replied sourly. ‘If I never saw her again in my whole life it’d be too soon.’

Mum carefully sprayed my hair, studying it this way and that like a work of art. ‘You dislike her that much?’

My eyes blazed. ‘Too right. I know she’s had a difficult life but she’s conceited, underhand, sly, manipulative …’

‘Oh dear.’ Mum laughed nervously.

I glowered. ‘I hope she takes herself off to the other side of the world.’

‘What was that?’

‘Er … nothing.’ It was best not to say anything yet about Genevieve leaving before it was definite, just in case Mum came over all guilty again.

Because Genevieve wouldn’t be there I dug out my favourite coat, and it felt wonderful to wear it again, like being hugged by an old friend. Mum waved me off and told me to watch my step because the ground was slippery and
snow was forecast for the next few days. I was OK walking in my trainers but lots of people were unprepared and I watched one lady, in stilettos, holding tightly to a wall, and an old man stuck on an ice patch unable to go forwards or back, his arms extended like a tightrope walker’s. Children were having fun sliding along the pavement, making everything so much more dangerous. I hit a patch of frozen water from an old leaky drainpipe and my foot skidded but I managed to stay upright.

At Hannah’s house the lights were on and the curtains open. Hannah and Nat rushed to the door and pulled me inside. Both were already dressed – Hannah in a slim-fitting ivory satin gown which had been her gran’s wedding dress, and Nat in a taffeta frock, shocking pink to match her hair, worn with her Converse pumps. A surge of excitement ran through me because this felt as good as dressing up as a child, trying on your mum’s clothes and make-up. I didn’t want to admit that I’d never had anyone to do this with.

‘Love your hair,’ they chanted in unison, steering me into the living room instead of the kitchen-diner where we normally hung out. ‘Now get into the dress, Katy.’

‘What’s the hurry?’ I asked, pulling the curtains across and self-consciously wriggling out of my jeans. ‘We’ve got all night.’

‘We can’t wait to do your make-up,’ Hannah replied, and I could sense her impatience.

I was about to strut up and down when one of her
hands forced me on to a dining chair and tilted my face to the light.

‘Foundation,’ she barked, and Hannah rummaged in her make-up bag and brought out a compact. It was impossible to talk as she pummelled my face and then instructed, ‘Blusher followed by eyeshadow.’

‘This is like having an operation,’ I joked, as she went to work on my eyes. I studied Nat close up, and then glanced over to Hannah. ‘Hey. How come your make-up’s already done?’

‘We were bored,’ Nat answered, lunging at me with a mascara wand and making me blink madly. She stood back to survey her handiwork and seemed relieved that it was finished.

‘There, Katy … you look great.’

I looked at my face in the mirror and had to admit she’d done a good job. My skin glowed; my eyes were a smoky grey, and I had razor-sharp cheekbones and exaggerated lips in a cupid’s bow. I took out my accessories to finish off the look, trying not to feel a sense of anticlimax because it was barely eight o’clock.

‘Well … I’m ready now. What’ll we do for the rest of the night?’

Nat looked at her watch and then back at Hannah. I got the distinct impression there was something they weren’t telling me. The doorbell chimed and Hannah jumped up and announced in a loud stagey voice, ‘I wonder who that could be?’

I trailed after her as she went to answer the door, and my jaw hit the ground.

‘Don’t stand there gawping.’ Hannah laughed. ‘Show the boys through to dinner.’

Merlin was standing on the doorstep dressed in pinstripe trousers with full top hat and tails and a canary-yellow waistcoat. Adam was beside him in a black tux and a white ruffled shirt, while another friend, Harvey, was wearing some sort of weird quilted smoking jacket and cravat. They looked like something out of
Brideshead Revisited
, and I couldn’t believe they’d walked along the street dressed this way, even in the dark. I looked behind them, expecting to see Genevieve making an entrance, but she was nowhere in sight.

Merlin moved forward, took my hand, encased in the black glove, and kissed it before stepping over the threshold. This already had an element of a play about it and I shadowed Hannah through the hallway and into the kitchen-diner. There were goblet wine glasses and proper napkins, with an elaborate silver candelabra taking centre stage. My gaze carried on through to the conservatory, which had been decorated with balloons and fairy lights. A disco ball was hanging from the glass roof and lots of sequined shapes were strung across the windows.

‘Are things OK between you and Merlin?’ Hannah whispered. ‘He said they were, but …’

‘They’re fine,’ I whispered back.

‘Sorry you missed the party,’ Nat grinned. ‘It’s not quite a marquee.’

‘It’s better,’ I told her, choked with emotion, and I really meant it. ‘It’s completely fab.’

The table was only laid for six, and I couldn’t believe that Genevieve would let me enjoy an evening like this without trying to ruin it. Hannah tapped one of the glasses with a spoon. ‘Sit down, everyone, and make sure you check your name card. The seating plan is already arranged and you have to stick to it.’ Hannah winked at me, because it was obvious that Adam would be strategically placed next to Nat. ‘Mum’s prepared all the food, so it won’t be disgusting. We haven’t any staff to wait on us, but Nat will do her best.’

Nat gave a loud groan but willingly went to help. I wasn’t allowed to lift a finger or to move from the table and spent the time grinning inanely at all the activity and soaking up the atmosphere. The food was light and vegetarian – creamy vegetable lasagne, loads of salad, panfried potatoes, and ciabatta to mop up the sauce. We all sat down to eat with a noisy clatter and Nat proposed a toast to me and to friendship, which actually brought a tear to my eye, although I hastily blinked it away. Genevieve could keep her huge ostentatious party; this was small, intimate and far more special.

Hannah’s dad had an old record player with a turntable that played 78s, and all through dinner we listened to a collection of 1920s music, laughing at the scratches in the
vinyl and the needle which kept sticking. By the second glass of sparkling wine it seemed even funnier, and I was convinced that Hannah had laced it with something stronger. My cheeks were on fire, despite the cold, because everything looked so pretty and everyone had made such an effort for me. Merlin was seated directly opposite and I talked and joked with everyone, trying to avoid his eyes because he had that look in them that was hard to resist. If we were alone together, I feared I’d drown.

Hannah startled everyone by suddenly leaping to her feet and screaming, ‘Omigod it’s snowing.’

Everyone rushed to the conservatory windows and watched as the first soft powdery flakes fell. It was completely crazy, but I had an overwhelming urge to be outside in it. I flung open the patio doors and tumbled on to the grass without any coat, the snow gently settling on my shoulders, my hair and my face as I gazed in wonder at its beauty mingled with a thousand stars. I threw my head back and twirled around the garden, rubbing the flakes into my skin. I was the ballerina, the escaped balloon, the leaf in the wind, twirling and pirouetting in this blanket of whiteness. There was laughter as everyone called my name but I kept on going until I reached a row of conifers at the bottom of the garden, standing in line like soldiers on parade. It took two people to drag me back inside, as wet and slippery as a fish that’d jumped out of the river. Nat threw me a towel and I patted my arms and neck, the sharpness of the cold making me tingle.

‘It looks like confetti in your hair,’ Merlin whispered, and I felt his hand brush the bare skin on my back.

It was then I knew that I’d been given a second chance and this was the night I’d wished for. Tonight I sparkled and could do no wrong; tonight I wasn’t invisible Katy. There was only one explanation – Genevieve had let go. There was no way I could feel so confident and free unless she was diminished in some way. She must have taken leave of me. Merlin stared as if he was seeing me for the first time and I flashed him my most radiant smile before moving back to the party.

My mood was contagious. The table was hastily cleared, with everyone mucking in to help, and the dance floor was declared open. We all swapped partners and tried the charleston, tango, foxtrot and, finally, Merlin took me in his arms for the waltz.

‘Imagine if we lived back then, Katy,’ he said, attempting a low dip and catching me just before I hit the floor.

‘Would you have looked at me … in your big house?’ I tried to keep it light-hearted. ‘You’d have been the squire’s son and I’d have been the housemaid polishing the silver or your boots.’

‘Sounds good.’ Merlin smirked. ‘I could have taken advantage of the servant girl.’

I did a mock curtsy, although I knew what was happening and that I was encouraging him.

‘I’m definitely forgiven?’ he asked earnestly.

‘There was nothing to forgive.’

‘And now?’

‘We’re dancing,’ I quipped.

‘And now, Katy?’ he persisted.

He stopped halfway through the dance, and still holding one hand, led me back through Hannah’s hallway. I hadn’t answered his question and he moved his face closer to mine. I didn’t pull away. He began very softly kissing my neck all the way up to my ear lobe. It felt unbelievable to have this time together, and I shut everything else from my mind. Any minute now he would reach my lips and it would be as if we’d never finished. And the best thing was that Genevieve deserved this, she really did. This was my ultimate revenge.

I suddenly caught sight of my face in a small mirror positioned next to the coat stand and recoiled. I looked so hard and cruel, my eyes glinting horribly. I barely recognized myself and from nowhere the realization hit me like a sledgehammer. If Merlin could so easily do this behind Genevieve’s back, then what did it say about him? Or about me? I tore myself away and rearranged my dress, livid with myself. Genevieve
did
deserve this, but to get my own back I had to sink to her level and I wouldn’t do that.

‘We’re not interchangeable, Merlin,’ I snapped. ‘You can’t just pick one of us up whenever the other one’s not around.’

He put one hand on his forehead. ‘I don’t know what came over me … I’m sorry.’

‘It’s OK, but we can’t go there again. You’re with Genevieve now.’

We couldn’t look at each other.

‘I almost forgot you weren’t mine,’ Merlin muttered, and walked away from me.

A taxi dropped me right outside my front door. It was difficult getting out because the dress was so fitted that I couldn’t stretch my leg very far without splitting it again. I’d held out at the party until midnight, thanked everyone profusely and made my getaway, refusing Merlin’s offer to walk me home and using the snow as an excuse. We’d got too close, and I had to make sure it didn’t happen again. The house was in darkness and I turned my bag inside out trying to locate my keys without switching on the outside light in case it woke Mum. I jumped about a metre in the air when a voice came from out of the blackness.

‘I knew you’d go back and buy that dress.’

‘What the …? You gave me such a fright. What are you doing here at this time of night?’

‘Waiting for you, Katy.’

Genevieve appeared from the shadows, her hair scraped tightly back and her face ghastly white. I was so spooked that it took me three attempts to put my key in the lock.

‘Have you missed me?’

‘Not really,’ I whispered, and pointed upstairs, indicating that she should keep her voice down. She wasn’t even wearing a coat, just a thick cardigan over a T-shirt. I could see how cold she was because her body was hunched and her hands red. I couldn’t believe she’d wait outside on a freezing December night just to taunt me.