Playing for the Other Team (18 page)

“No,” I said bluntly. “I didn’t realize that. But I’m glad.” Suddenly I felt bad I had been mad at him in the first place. After everything Jasper had been through, who was I to decide what he could and should have to handle? “But,” I said then and swallowed. “Um. Sleeping. I mean…that. Do you really think we should, like, now?”

He looked at me, eyes full of sudden concern. “You don’t want to?”

That was when I realized how vulnerable he really was right now. He had offered something that had often been taken from him before he was truly ready. He’d been taught that sex was how he could be worth something to his boyfriends, but he knew I didn’t think that way, and he was initiating it this time. I wasn’t going to reject that gift because of my stupid nerves.

“I do want you,” I assured him. “I’m just not sure I’m ready for the whole thing, you know?”

“Oh.” His expression brightened, and he gave me a small smile. “No, of course, I didn’t mean— There’s lots of stuff we can do. Whatever you want.”

When he tugged at my arm, I went, following him to the bed. He threw himself on it, and I bent down to give him a very tender, very thorough kiss. Our tongues collided, and halfway through the kiss, he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me down with him into the sheets. I ended up pressed against his warm body while we continued to explore each other. The kiss was tender and comforting, and as I slid my hands up to Jasper’s shoulders, I wondered whether I would ever grow tired of kissing him. It wasn’t going to happen anytime soon; I knew that much.

“Mmm,” Jasper mumbled when we came apart, and shivered. “Do that again.”

I did. He ran his fingers through my hair, his hand so shaky and uncoordinated that he eventually poked a finger into my ear. I snickered at that.

“Shut up. I’m trying to be sexy.”

“You are, you know,” I said and helped him take off his T-shirt. “Sexy.”

He blushed and wrapped his arms around his knee as he sat there. I’d seen him wearing far less before, but it was different this time. There was something more between us, some kind of current that sparked whenever we touched. It was dizzying.

I ran my hand through the strands of his thick hair, finger-combing it lovingly. With his cheeks so red and lips parted, he looked good. Good and… “Edible.”

“Hmm?” Jasper vocalized.

“You look edible,” I repeated and tried to prove that statement by running my tongue across his shoulder and along the side of his neck. It made him shudder, which I counted as a success.

Then we were back to kissing, because I was so, so starved for him. He pulled me close, and we held each other tightly, kissing and kissing and kissing, and it took a throaty moan on Jasper’s part before I regained awareness enough to realize I had begun a slow, circular grind, my hips against his.

“Oh my God,” he breathed into my mouth as his nails dug into the back of my neck. I shivered. It was so good, just doing this and not even anything else. But after a little while, Jasper untangled himself. He bit his lip as he moved a little bit away and looked at me, grasping my arms after a moment.

“Bry,” he said, “I really want to go down on you right now.”

I couldn’t breathe, that was what his words did to me. My chest felt constricted.

“Yes?” he asked. “Is that okay?”

I nodded.

Then he tackled me. Our arms and legs tangled together again, and we rolled, nearly falling off the bed. I saved us at the last moment by flinging out a leg to stop the momentum.

“Whoops,” Jasper said, laughing, sounding breathless and completely unconcerned with our safety. I was laughing too as I pressed my lips to his again, then to his throat, his ear.

“You’re amazing,” I told him, and by the way his face lit up, it had been the right thing to say.

He smoothed his palms over my still-clothed chest before slipping underneath and stroking my belly. I wasn’t superathletic or anything, really just your middle-of-the-pack baseball player, but when Jasper touched me like that, his face zoned out with an expression of awe, like he was touching some Greek god made flesh.

To be honest, it was all sorts of awesome for my ego.

“You’re all muscle,” he said. “That’s
so hot
.”

I flexed the muscles in question and did a half crunch in order to take my shirt off. It was part showing off and part indulging my boyfriend, and his smile told me that he knew that perfectly well. He bent down and kissed my bare chest. I didn’t have a lot of body hair, only a small blond-and-silver trail leading downward, but when Jasper discovered it, he acted like it was the best thing ever, licking and distributing openmouthed kisses across the entire length, all the way to the waistband of my jeans. There, he sucked on my skin with an intensity and focus that made me shudder with anticipation. The way he curled his tongue, the way he flicked at my skin, all of it was an exquisite tease that promised so much more.

It hadn’t been like that with Nova or with any of the few other girls I’d hooked up with over the past several years mostly out of some misplaced sense of obligation. And I wasn’t sure whether it was finally being with a guy that made this so much better, or whether it was just Jasper and the fact that he was incredible, but I knew this wasn’t gonna be like anything I’d ever experienced.

“Bry,” he breathed, and sensually popped the button of my jeans. I hadn’t even known that it was possible to do this sensually, but Jasper managed, and I felt a throb of longing that originated in my crotch and traveled through my entire body.

“Bry,” Jasper said again, tugging on my belt, “I want you to relax, okay? Just…don’t worry about anything.”

When I looked down at him, he was staring at me, and his eyes were large and darker than normal. His hair was just within reach of my hand, so I indulged myself and ran my fingers through it.

“Okay,” I rasped.

“Don’t worry about hurting me or anything. I’ll be fine. I want you to just enjoy.”

There was no way for me to
not
worry about hurting him. No way was I going to be rough or anything, but instead of arguing the point, I simply said again, “Okay.”

Don’t let it be said that I don’t know when to shut up.

I lifted my hips and allowed Jasper to tug down my pants. This was as much of me as he’d seen before, me in boxer-briefs, except last time I hadn’t been aroused, and this time I so very clearly was.

I blushed as Jasper eyed my erection. Then he tentatively slid his palm across it, and I threw my head back and moaned because that small touch already felt ridiculously good, a little bit like prickling electricity traveling along my length. This was stupid. Being touched had never felt this good before, ever, and we hadn’t even gotten started yet.

“You’re so sensitive,” Jasper said, sounding awed. He kissed me through my underwear before sliding a finger beneath the waistband. “I can totally work with that.”

My mouth was too dry to respond. My fingers tightened in Jasper’s hair as I tensed up, holding my breath as he eased my underwear down my hips. And then—

“Oh fuck,” I gasped as I was engulfed by slick, wet warmth and gentle pressure. My hips came off the bed despite my best efforts; it just felt
so good
, too good, too freaking amazing to be real.

Jasper moaned, and it sounded like the best thing I’d ever heard as it vibrated through me. I was panting, making small noises I didn’t even mean to make. I clutched the back of his head and fisted his hair. Everything was just a haze of wonderful.

No, it definitely had never ever been like this before. The curl of Jasper’s tongue, the little flicks he did, the movement of his hand, and above it all, the fact that it was Jasper who was giving me this gift, it all added up to a sensation so powerful I couldn’t stand it.

“Oh God,” I breathed. My back arched of its own volition and I simply came undone. A shudder raced through me, white-hot and ice-cold at once, and even though it was way too soon to put an end to the act, I drowned in bliss and felt nothing else for the longest time.

When I came back to myself, Jasper had shifted so he was lying next to me with his head half on my chest, half on my shoulder. He was looking at me and stroking my skin wherever he could reach it.

“You okay?” he asked.

“Oh God, yes.”

He smirked a little. It looked good on him, that confidence. I could have looked at his face all day.

“Sorry I, um…it was kind of fast,” I tried to apologize. Jasper shushed me.

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” he assured me.

“And you haven’t—”

“I’m fine, honestly.”

But he looked a little pained as he said it, and when I slid my hand lower, up the inside of his thigh, I knew for sure that he was not
fine
. He was as hard as only someone with a lot of pent-up sexual frustration could be. Question was, what was I going to do about it?

When I wrapped my fingers around that warm, hard cock, Jasper squeezed his eyes shut with a whimper. Despite the fact that I’d never done this to anyone but myself before, I bravely forged ahead and started stroking him. He felt different, slender and silky against my palm. After a moment, he arched his back and thrust up into my hand with obvious enjoyment.

“Okay?” I asked anyway, partially because I needed to know if I was doing it right and partially because I
wanted
to hear that I was doing it right.

“Oh, yes.” Jasper sighed and thrust again. “Yes, perfect. Maybe…mmh, maybe use some spit.”

I could do that. Hell, I wanted to do that. I wanted this to be just about as close to perfection as I could get it, considering all he had given me—I was still shaky from that intense orgasm. So I licked my palm and applied it to him again, and he sighed and moaned and moved so sensually that I could have watched him do it all day.

“Bry,” he breathed, “
so
good. God, keep going.”

I did, and I increased the pace a little and watched him slowly fall apart beneath my touch. It was incredible, knowing I was doing that to him, especially since he was the one with all of the experience, and getting a handjob shouldn’t have been anything special for him. But he acted like it was, skin all flushed and breath shaky, eyes closed as he squirmed and bucked up and just generally tried everything he could to demand more. I gave him more, quickening the pace, adding more spit, tightening my grip just so. One of his hands came down and clamped onto my arm, and then he was basically fucking into my fist, throwing his head back with a strangled groan. Next thing I know, there was slickness on my palm as his nails dug into my skin so hard it hurt. I didn’t try to dislodge him, just kept going as I had been until he eventually, finally, went slack.

There was a contented sigh, followed by a moment of comfortable silence.

“You made me come,” Jasper said dreamily.

“Yeah,” I replied with a stupid grin on my face.

“That felt so good.” He stroked over the indents where his nails had just been. “Thank you, Bry.”

“I didn’t think it’d be that exciting for you,” I told him honestly.

“Are you kidding? Your very first time with a guy. You think that doesn’t make me feel awesome? The one I’ve wanted for four years laying hands on me, that was supposed to leave me cold?”

I blushed a little.

“You are seriously underestimating your appeal,” Jasper said and pulled me close. “Seriously.”

“Well, I’m not exactly a sex god or anything.”

“Sex god in training,” Jasper said with a grin and kissed me deeply before pillowing his head on my chest again and cuddling up to me with a sleepy little sigh.

* * * *

My phone’s ring tone woke me up. It was Nova.

“Bryson,” she said, “I thought you might want to know about the interesting rumor that’s making the rounds at this party.”

“Uh,” I said. “Now?”

“No, tomorrow. That’s why I called now.”

“What?”

She sighed. I could basically hear her roll her eyes in exasperation. “So I was just told this fascinating, obviously totally factual account of how Fletcher, of all people, is a closeted gay guy.”

“What?”

“And, so the rumor goes, he’s really just angry about the whole thing with you and Jasper because you and him used to have a thing.”

“A what?”

“A thing, Bry. A thing. A hey-let’s-get-together-and-do-naughty-things-to-each-other kind of thing.”

“
What
?” I yelled full-force. Jasper gasped and bolted upright next to me, eyes wide and terrified. “Holy…
what
?”

“Bry. Get a vocabulary. Anyway, I was standing there thinking,
Gee, that sounds kinda odd, ’cause when I hooked up with Fletcher a while back, he was totally into it
. So I asked around to try and figure out if anyone had ever actually seen you two together, and where the hell this whole thing came from anyway. Turns out the only one who says he actually saw you going at it is some skinny kid with purple hair who I’m pretty sure used to date Jasper. Weird coincidence, huh?”

“Oh, crap.” My heart sank into my kneecaps. I put my head in my hand. “Crap.”

“What?” Jasper asked in a whisper, grasping my arm. “What’s going on?”

“Thanks for telling me,” I said to Nova and hung up on her.

Then I turned to Jasper. “Fucking Christopher,” I said, “is spreading rumors. About me and Fletcher, of all people.”

Jasper made a strange little sound and leaned his head on my shoulder.

“I’m sorry,” he said.

“For what?”

“He’s only doing that because of me. If we weren’t together, he would leave you alone.”

“Yeah, well, I’m not about to break up with you because of that jerkwad. So question is, how do we get him to stop with all this BS?”

“I’ll talk to him,” Jasper offered.

I put my arm around him tightly. “No way,” I said. “You’re not gonna make yourself vulnerable like that.”

Jasper chuckled sadly. “Bry, have you been paying attention? My ex is distributing dirty pictures of me. I’m already as vulnerable as I’m gonna get.”

I had no good answer to that.

Chapter Fifteen

Everything Hits the Fan