Planet Urth: The Savage Lands (Book 2) (10 page)

My mind struggles to comprehend her refusal to escape before being slaughtered where she stands in the coming days.  I do not understand her stubbornness.  But I realize it is not my job to convince her to leave.  The choice is hers.  Each woman will decide for herself. 

I look up at the moon and stars then back down at her face.  “I hope he does for your sake, because if you stay and wait for Urthmen, you’re going to need all the help you can get to fight them.”

“We will die for certain if we leave,” the woman replies willfully.  I am not sure what she is so worked up about.  I am concerned for her well-being, for her survival. 

“What will you do for food?” I ask
to be sure she will eat.

“I can hunt and provide for us,” the young boy chimes in. 
His face is puffy and his eyes are red from crying.  “I am staying with them and I will hunt for them.”

I eye the boy. 
“I’m sure you can,” I say and hope for the women’s sake he does not possess the tendencies of the other men who ran this compound. 

“But you still need to ta
lk it over with the girls from the hut,” I say.  I glance over my shoulder and see Will, who has been pacing silently until now.  He furrows his brow and looks at me, puzzled.  I shake my head from side to side slowly then return my attention to the woman.  “Talk to them,” I continue.  “You owe them that, at least, a say in what they do, right?”  Will walks to where I can see him.  He looks at me then to the boy and the women, a troubled look veiling his features.

“It will be a long time before they are right again,” the old woman says.  “They need calm.  They will need to stay
too,” she says with finality.

“Just talk to them, please.  Give them the option one way or the other,”
I say and I hear exasperation creep into my tone. 

“You won’t be safe here,” June voices her opinion by adding. 

“You won’t be safe out there,” the old woman counters confidently.  She tips her chin high then adds, “You are walking toward certain death.”

The woman
’s tone, though quiet, is filled with arrogance born of certainty.  She is completely convinced that she is right to stay and that we are wrong to leave.

June plants her hands on her hips and tips her chin
to match the old woman’s stance.  Her posture is defiant.  “No we aren’t.  We have Avery, not some imaginary cloud friend,” she says. 

I feel heat warm my cheeks and know they are a deep scarlet hue.  I am thankful for the night, for the darkness.  No one can see me blushing.  June overestimates me.  I worry she looks up to me too much.

“I’ll discuss it with the girls,” the boy speaks up before a squabble ensues.  “I’ll tell them what choices they have.”

“Good.  Thank you,” Will says.

“Then it’s settled.  You will talk to the girls and let us know in the morning what their decision is, and we need to sleep if we’re traveling first thing in the morning.” 

“We will see you at daybreak,” the woman says. 
She looks at June.  She narrows her eyes and purses her thin, cracked lips.  Clearly, she did not appreciate June’s cloud-friend remark.  I step in front of my sister protectively, placing my body between June and the old lady.  The old lady’s gaze goes to my face and she adds, “Best get inside your hut.  We need to take care of our dead.”

I watch for
a moment, unsure of what she means by ‘take care of’ her dead.  But when she shambles toward Tal’s father’s body, joined by another woman, and lifts his ankles and begins dragging him, her words become clear.  She and the other woman plod down a small pathway with rows of huts on either side.  Tal’s father’s head and body bump along unceremoniously and leave a smear of crimson in their wake.  The other women remaining follow suit and drag another of the men on the floor by his ankles and haul him to an undisclosed location.

“Ugh,” June says and presses her face into my arm. 

“You said it,” I agree. 

June yawns and tries to conceal it with her hand.  Her eyes are bloodshot and her skin is paler than usual. 

“Let’s go inside and get some shut-eye,” I say and begin ushering her inside the hut we began our night in. 

“I think one of us should keep watch tonight,” Will grips my upper arm lightly and says in my ear. 

His hot breath against my earlobe sends chills racing over my flesh.  He is right, of course.  I just need sleep so desperately, I can’t imagine being the one to sit vigil. 

I turn and face him, about to volunteer when Oliver speaks.

“I’ll do it,” Oliver says and I nearly weep with joy.  “I’ve gotten the most sleep out of all of us in the last few days so I’ll do the first shift.”

“Thank you, Oliver,” I say and resist the urge to hug him.  “If I don’t get some sleep, I don’t think I’ll be able to walk at all in the morning.”

“No problem, Avery.  It’s the least I can do.  You keep saving us all the time,” Oliver says and looks away sheepishly. 

“Thanks again,” I add
.  I ignore the comment he made about me saving them all the time.  I don’t have the strength to argue that he and his brother would do the same for us, and retreat to the hut. 

Once inside, I close the door behind me, leaving Oliver at his post. 
I am not surprised when I see June and Riley nestled close to one another, their eyelids heavy.  Will lifts his sleep sack.  He makes a production of shaking it.  I look at him and wonder why he is doing what he is doing.  I also wonder whether I should do the same.  I quirk an eyebrow at him, and he stops and carries his sleep sack over to where mine is unrolled.  He places it next to mine and lies atop it, propping himself up on one elbow while facing me.  I do the same, mirroring his position. 

“What was that all about?” I ask.

“I don’t know,” Will answers.  “I guess I just don’t want to sleep on something those men stepped on.”

“I understand,” I say.  I inhale deeply.  “I can’t believe that there are humans in this world who harm one another.
  I just don’t get it.”  I pinch the bridge of my nose then rub my forehead.

“I kno
w.  It doesn’t make sense.  We’re all fighting the same fight, just trying to survive.”

“It’s true. 
I just don’t understand.  I mean, what Tal, Ross and Jay and the other men did to those women, it just, I don’t know; it blows my mind.  Girls around my age, chained up, naked and dirty,” I say and feel a turbulent rise of anger swell inside of me.  “I keep picturing their faces.  Streaks were carved through layers of filth and ran from their eyes to their chins.  Their gazes were hollow, haunted, as if they’d been broken,” I say through my teeth.  I swallow hard.  “They were breeders.  One was pregnant and the men kept going to them, taking them against their will.  They thought they were doing something noble, that they were repopulating our species,” I huff. 

“Oh my gosh,” Will breathes.  “That’s what happened.”

“Yes,” I answer, disgust burning hot inside me.

“And they
wanted Riley and June here, too, and you,” Will adds.

I cannot see his face clearly and do not know what expression he wears, but I hear the tightness in his voice.  I imagine he shares my revulsion, my red-hot fury at the notion of anyone trying to harm my sister or his sister. 

“The thought of anyone touching,” Will starts to say but cannot finish his sentence.

I reach out my hand, hoping it will land on his shoulder, but I cannot see well enough to judge properly.  When my hand lands on the warm swell of his chest, I breathe in silently, but
do not release my breath.  I feel the steady rhythm of his heartbeat beneath my fingertips.  It quickens and I begin to pull my hand away.  Will’s hand lands atop mine suddenly and I feel my own heart begin to riot within my ribcage.  I am still holding my breath, reveling in the feel of his large palm covering my mine.  I also feel the solidness of the muscles underneath his shirt and just beneath his skin.

“When I think about what they wanted to do to you,” he says.  His voice startles me slightly.  I was lulled by his heartbeat, enjoying the odd sensation whispering across my skin.  “It makes me insane with rage,” he says. 

My heart stutters as my brains works to make sure my ears heard what I think he just said.  He was mad about what the men wanted to do to
me
?  The idea is confusing.  Why would he care in the least?  I am not his sister.  True, I am part of his life now in a way that connects us, but I have not shared my life with him as Riley and Oliver have. 

“I want to protect you,” he says in a voice low and filled with tenderness. 

He begins stroking the soft flesh on the top of my hand.  My scalp feels as if it has shrunk and is now two sizes too small for my head. 

“But I haven’t been able to protect any of us so far.  I haven’t helped at all
,” he adds and laughs once.  It is a quiet, self-depreciating sound.

My fingertips tense involuntarily and grip his powerful chest.  “No, that’s not true,” I disagree with him.  “You’ve been,” I start but am suddenly breathless.  “Perfect,” I manage in a weak voice. 

“Avery,” he says my name and goose bumps race across my skin.  “I admire so much about you, how well you hunt, how good you are with June, your bravery, and don’t get me started about your skills as a fighter,” he adds and I hear that he is smiling before I strain to see his teeth, pale against the darkness.  “And you’re beautiful,” he says seriously.  I no longer hear or see his smile.  “I want to be what you are.  I want to be what you need.” 

The tremor in his voice sends a tremor spiraling through my core. 
He thinks I’m brave, and good with June, that I am a good hunter and an excellent fighter, and he thinks I’m beautiful!  My mind is swimming laps around a lake of happiness.  I am dizzy and cold yet my insides feel as if they would rival the surface of the sun on a midsummer day. I want to tell him that I think he is beautiful, that I have never seen anyone or anything quite as beautiful as he is.  I want to tell him that when he is near, as he is now, I cannot think straight, I cannot breathe properly, my entire body goes haywire and I do not know whether I am sick or losing my mind or both.  But the words do not come out.  Dizzying, overwhelming excitement has seized my ability to speak apparently.

“You are,” I manage to choke out and hope I do not sound as crazy as I feel. 

“I am?” he asks.

“Yes,” I murmur.

I feel his chest moving against my hand, inching forward as he leans closer to me.  His heart is drilling against it, almost matching the pace of mine.  I blow out a thin stream of air and inhale again.  My insides tremble the nearer he draws. 

My cells are firing
all at once.  His face is so close I can make out the sharp angle of his jaw and the soft indentation between his nose and lips.  His hot breath feathers across my face for a moment, and time seems to stand still.  The scent of him fills me.  He smells of sweet grass and nighttime, of sweat and musk.  I want him to stay as he is forever so I can breathe him in and feel his heart beating beneath my hand. 

The soft skin of his lips grazes mine as he
brushes past me and presses his cheek to my cheek.  I would collapse if I wasn’t already on the ground, propped up on one elbow.  In fact, I still think I may faint and fall to the ground all the same. 

He whispers in my ear, “That makes me so happy.” 

The urge to grip both sides of his face and press my mouth to his overtakes me.  I do not know why I feel as I do, but it frightens me.  He is close, so close I can feel his pulse darting in his neck.  I want to plant my lips there too.  Perhaps I should.  Perhaps he wants me to.  I do not know what he wants.  I feel my muscles begin to stiffen and I am frozen. 

He leans back at bit and is facing me, his lips so close I could touch them just by puckering slightly.

“Avery,” he says my name with urgency I can feel, urgency I am experiencing though I don’t know why.

My heart is hammering in my ears.  I am practically panting.  “Good night, Will,” I say and slip my hand from his then lower my body and roll on my side, away from him. 

Feeling as if the ground beneath me has opened, I have the sensation that I am plunging into a blackened abyss, a void from which return is impossible.  I am falling. Into what, or where, I am falling I have no idea.  I cover my face with both hands as unworthiness and embarrassment pull me lower.

I hate myself for what I just did or didn’t do.  I feel panicked and sad, scared and excited all at once.  I hear the soft rustle of Will’s sleep sack and know that he is no longer ri
ght beside me.  I would not need to hear it to be sure, though.  I feel the coldness of his absence.  I wrap my arms across my chest and place one hand on either shoulder, bracing myself against the chill that has seeped into my bones and causes me to shiver.

“Good night, Avery,” Will says.

Tears heat the backs of my eyelids.  I do not know why I am crying but am powerless to stop it.  I allow them to fall silently until utter exhaustion grips me and pulls me under the surface of its dark and murky waters.  

Chapter 6