Plain Jayne (32 page)

After sharing her own experience with how Barry cheated on her, and how she couldn’t leave because she was too scared, and because, frankly, she couldn’t afford to, Jayne offered to let Maya stay at her apartment whenever she wanted. Ellie thought Maya should castrate the son of a bitch and be done with it, and Regan simply held Maya’s hand and made sure her glass was always full.

By midweek, Jayne was beginning to worry. She’d hardly spoken to Nick since her birthday, and the few times she had, he’d been distracted, busy trying to get the Schwanns’ house finished early, so he could (as he so vaguely put it) focus on other things.

Between runs to the city on Wednesday, she stopped in at the Cactus Café, ordered some lunch to go, then moved aside to let the next person order.

“Hey, Jayne. Good to see you.” Brett Hale reached around the counter, filled a mug with steaming hot coffee, and left a couple bucks on the counter. “Want to sit while you wait?”

“Yeah. Sure.”

They took the last table near the back, where he sat facing the front of the café. It had to be close to eighty degrees inside the restaurant, and there he sat, cool as the proverbial cucumber in his starched uniform and Kevlar, with God knows how much weight hanging off his belt. The gun alone had to weigh two or three pounds and that was only one of the scary-looking things he carried.

“Nick says you got the place looking real nice.” He sipped his coffee slowly, his dark eyes never wavering from her face.

She nodded, smiled. “It’s getting there, slowly.”

“Big job.”

There was a brief moment of silence, but for the first time in her life, Jayne didn’t fidget. She didn’t stress over it and she didn’t scramble to find something to talk about. It just happened.

“So when did you move to town?” she asked. “Don’t think you were here the last time I visited.”

“Coming on five years. Transferred from Toronto.”

“Me too,” she laughed. “How does a big-city cop end up in a town this size?”

“He follows a woman.”

“Oh, nice. What does she do?”

A slight lift of Brett’s shoulder was the only movement. “Last I heard she and her new
husband had moved up north.”

“Ouch. Sorry.”

Another lift of the shoulder. “It happens.”

Sara came around and set Jayne’s wrapped sandwich on the table next to her water.

“Thanks,” Jayne said, then turned to Brett. “Gotta run into the city, but it was good to see you.”

He stood as she rose from her seat. “Jayne?”

“Hmm?”

“Would you like to go for a drink sometime?”

What?
Did he just ask her out? Brett? Standing there in uniform with a small arsenal strapped to his hip? Her hesitation made him blink.

“Sorry,” he muttered. “Is that awkward? If there’s someone else … if you and Nick—”

“No,” she blurted out, then shook her head. “I mean, sure.”

“So a drink then?”

“Sure, o-okay.” What was she doing? A date with one of Nick’s friends? Was she crazy?
Was Brett?

“Good.” Did the man ever smile? “How’s tomorrow night?”

“Um, yeah. Sure.”

“Chalker’s at six?”

“Yeah, sure, okay.” How many times had she said that in the last sixty seconds? Her fingers tightened around her water bottle until it crunched in. She needed to get out of there. “I’ll meet you there.”

Oh God. Oh God.
Oh God
.

She walked out of the bakery, and instead of going to her car like she planned, she headed straight over to Ellie’s store and almost wrenched the door off its hinges. Ellie looked up from the shirt she was folding, took one look at Jayne, and shouted for her assistant.

“Angie!”

A short woman with a round face and crazy-wild blond hair stepped out of the back room.

“I’m going out for a bit. If I’m not back, can you lock up tonight? I’ll cash out later.” She grabbed her purse from under the counter, took Jayne by the arm, and marched her back to the
bookstore. “Keys.”

Jayne started to hand them over, then shook her head. “No. I have to go into the city. There’s books. The guy said he’d only hold them until three.”

“Fine. I’m driving.” They got into the car and Ellie peeled out onto Logger’s Lane and down toward the highway. “Spill it.”

“I-I have a … date … tomorrow,” she finally said. “With Brett Hale.”

“The cop?”
Ellie gaped, then immediately changed her tone to sound supportive, fake as it was. “Sorry, I mean that’s great.”

“No it’s not.”

“Why not? I mean, I’d never date a cop, but he seems okay.” Ellie twisted her head to look at Jayne, then grinned. “Is this a Nick thing? I thought you said you were just friends.”

“We
are
just friends!”

“But?”

“But,” Jayne sputtered. “But … I don’t know! I’m so confused.” She pressed the side of her head to the window and grabbed the door handle as Ellie wheeled around a curve in the road.

“Confused. Okay.” Ellie nodded. “Well, we have the better part of an hour before we get to the city, so break it down for me, and let’s try to figure it out.”

“I can’t,” Jayne sighed. “There’s too much.”

Lead-foot Ellie wasn’t going to be put off. “Sure you can.
Reader’s Digest
condensed version. Go.”

At the speed Ellie was driving, they’d be in the city well before an hour was up, so Jayne spoke as fast as she could, hitting as many highlights as she could, including a brief sampling of life with Gran, Nick, Abby, Barry, a few of the other princes she’d dated, Nick again, and every confusing thing she’d seen, heard, or felt in the last six weeks, including the moment up at the lake when she thought Nick might kiss her. She left out the part about how it nearly broke her when he didn’t.

“Wow,” Ellie breathed. “That’s, um, wow.”

“Yeah, ‘wow’ doesn’t actually help me, Ellie. What do I do?”

Ellie licked her lips and squinted through the windshield.

“Okay, first of all, I can’t believe my ass he married that other chick.”

“Abby,” Jayne said. “And why not? She was smart, and funny, and gorgeous like you
wouldn’t believe. I’m talkin’ Victoria’s-Secret-supermodel gorgeous. He loved her.”

“Uh-huh. And what about you?”

“Oh, please.” Jayne clicked her tongue. “If I had a picture of her, you’d understand.”

“Doubt it.” Her fingers tightened around the steering wheel and her eyes flashed. “He’s a big dumb ass like the rest of them.”

“No he’s not. He’s sweet and—”

“Oh, don’t even start,” Ellie warned, pulling out to pass the Fiat in front of them. “Sweet guys don’t dump you for another chick.”

“He didn’t dump me. We were friends, we’ve always been friends.”

“Puh-lease.” She wheeled the car back into the right lane. “So what are you going to do?”

“I don’t know.” She sounded pathetic even to her own ears. “Do you always drive this fast?”

“Yes.” She flashed Jayne a quick smile. “Okay, forget everything else. If Dumb Ass told you right here, right now, he couldn’t stand it another second and he needed to have at it with you in the backseat—and I’m talking eyes rolling to the back of your head, tsunami-causing, earth-shattering sex—what would you say?”

“Nick wouldn’t do that. He’s with Lisa.”

“Jayne! Focus. What would you say?”

“Well, I don’t … I mean, if Lisa wasn’t in the picture …” Jayne stopped, chewed her bottom lip until the top layer of skin pulled up. Finally, she dropped her face into her hands and growled. “Yes.”

“And given the little kissy episode up by the lake, I’d be willing to bet he was just a couple bee stings shy of asking.” Her face softened as she turned to look at Jayne.

“Eyes on the road!”

Ellie clicked her tongue and sighed. “He’s still a dumb ass for marrying that other chick.”

“Abby.”

“Whatever. Is it just sex? ’Cause if it’s just sex, you can get that with anyone, Jayne, it doesn’t have to be with Dumb Ass.”

“It’s not just sex. I think about him all the time, and when I’m not with him, it’s like a physical pain right here.” She pressed her fist against her chest, half hoping she wasn’t really confessing this out loud and that it was only a dream.

“Could be acid reflux. Have you tried some Tums?” Ellie tapped her fingers against the wheel, smirking. “Okay, forget about when you’re not with him. What about when you’re together?”

The smile came out of nowhere, trailing long streams of warmth behind it that oozed through every pore in Jayne’s body. And with every passing second, it grew warmer, softer, until laughter bubbled out of her.

“Oh, stop it,” Ellie gagged. “I’m sorry I asked.”

Still, Jayne smiled. “I can’t help it.”

“Ugh.” She shuddered. “Just shut up. I don’t suppose there’s any chance this is just a passing thing?”

Jayne stared straight back at her.

“Are you sure?” Ellie sighed. “From the sounds of it, you haven’t exactly been ‘out there’ since you left that other dumb ass, so maybe you just need a good romp.”

Jayne let her head fall back against the headrest. “It’s not just a passing thing and I don’t want to go ‘romping’ with anyone else.”

“You sure?” When Jayne didn’t answer, Ellie shrugged. “Okay, so how long have you been in love with Dumb Ass?”

“Honestly?” Jayne chuckled. “Second week of kindergarten.”

Ellie rolled her eyes dramatically. “One more answer like that and I promise you, I’ll puke in your car and leave it for you to clean up, so stop it.”

Jayne laughed. As pathetic as she was, the relief she felt at getting this all out after so many years was overwhelming. And exhausting!

“Of all the stupid things I’ve done,” she muttered. “This is probably the stupidest.”

“It’s only stupid if you keep trying to deny it,” Ellie said. “Do you think he’s in love with you?”

“No way.” The answer came as naturally as breathing, and as painfully as dying.

“How can you be so sure?” Ellie cast her another quick glance. “He did try to kiss you.”

“We don’t know that for sure, maybe I just imagined it. Besides, this is Nick.” Jayne laughed lightly, even though she didn’t think any of this was particularly funny. “If he was in love with me, he wouldn’t be with Lisa. I’m more like a responsibility to him because of our history.”

The car filled with silence for a while. Jayne could feel Ellie’s exasperation building like steam in a kettle, but it still made her jump when Ellie finally exploded.

“That is the biggest load of horse crap I’ve ever heard!” Her head swerved to look from the road to Jayne and back again. “No one does things like he does because they feel ‘responsible’ for you. I feel responsible for you, too, but you can bet your ass I’m not going to go making you dandelion necklaces or give you a key to my house ‘for anytime you want to come home again.’ ”

She opened her mouth and jabbed her finger in, making gagging noises all the while.

“Very funny,” Jayne said. “Take this next exit. If you knew Nick, you’d know this is what he’s always done. It doesn’t mean anything more than that.”

The warmth Jayne felt just moments ago dissolved as Lisa’s words came rushing back to her.
“You’re like a sister to him. If he felt anything else for you … anything more … he would have acted on it by now.”

Ellie’s brow furrowed. “Which way?”

“Left.”

“Maybe he’s waiting for you to make the first move.”

“Uh, no.” Jayne choked on a snort. “Nick doesn’t wait for anyone to do anything.”

“Well, who knows?” Ellie shrugged. “Maybe you should give it a shot and see what happens.”

“Are you out of your freakin’ mind?”

“Why not?”

“Have you not heard anything I’ve said?” Jayne cried. “He has a girlfriend! And even if he didn’t, he’s been my best friend for twenty-five years, Ellie.
Twenty-five years!
I can’t risk losing that; not now.”

“You’ve wasted your whole life waiting for this guy, Jayne. What could you possibly have to lose?”

“Everything.” An iron fist of panic tightened around Jayne’s heart. “He’s the closest thing I have to family, Ellie. If I lose him, I’ve got nothing.”

“So you’re going to sit back and watch him make gooey eyes at the party planner? What if he marries her, too? Then what are you going to do?”

“Nothing. I watched him get married once before and it didn’t kill me.” Jayne swallowed
hard. “I can do it again.”

“Jayne.”

“Forget it, Ellie,” she said, preventing Ellie from spilling whatever harsh comment she was about to spout. “All that matters is keeping Nick in my life, however I can get him, and if that means things stay the way they are, then that’s … that’s … fine. It’s the green house on the left.”

“Seriously.” Ellie shook her head slowly and sighed. “You poor screwed-up little lunatic.”

They spent a couple hours going through the seventy boxes of books the man had in his garage, and another few minutes talking price before loading Jayne’s car to capacity, setting a time for the next pickup, and heading back up the highway, with Jayne behind the wheel this time.

Ellie eased her seat back as far as it would go, then kicked off her shoes and crossed her feet over the dashboard. “So you’re going to go out with Brett, then?”

“Yeah, I guess so.”

“Good. He’s not my type, but maybe he’ll help you see that Dumb Ass isn’t the be-all and end-all that you seem to think he is.”

“Maybe.” Jayne sighed doubtfully. “It just seems weird going out with one of his friends.”

“Why?” Ellie grunted. “From what I understand, the cop made Nick’s short list before he set you up with Martin, so I’m sure you’ll all have cozy double dates and everything’ll be just rainbows and unicorns.”

She opened Jayne’s long-forgotten lunch bag and pulled out the sandwich. She handed half to Jayne, then took a bite out of her own half. “And I bet the party planner’ll be over the moon if you’d find yourself someone other than her boyfriend to hang out with.”

Yup, there was no denying Lisa would be happy about that. As would Nick’s mom, and probably Nick himself.

After dropping Ellie off, Jayne went straight to her place and unloaded the car again. The shelves still weren’t full, but the logo was in the front window and the credit card machine had been activated, so come hell or high water, Dandelion Books would open Saturday.