Pieces of Lies (7 page)

The passionate artist in me was screaming to push my limits. She had always taken me to places I didn’t regret. Listening to her, I relaxed my fingers and then flattened my hands so I could turn them and entwine my hands with his. Clint's hands gripped mine hard and simultaneously, we both exhaled.

Oh dear god, wow! What is going on?

He didn’t let go of my hand as we ate and finished our drinks, and we were still holding hands when we left the café.

“I really do like you Norah, I really do,” Clint stated almost unbelievably as we walked through the car park towards my car.

“Well as long as you really do.” I was a bit suspicious about his comment because it sounded like it had a hidden meaning.

“You are just so different to what I thought. I’m a little taken back.”

I raised my eyebrows. “Must be nice to be surprised once in a while.”

He turned me in towards his body staring right into my eyes. “You have no idea. And you are just so beautiful as well, I find it hard to...”

Clint stalled on his words.

“Stop thinking about you.”

I swallowed. I didn’t have a response to that. I couldn’t speak at all. He was doing it again, revealing himself and a side of him I could deeply fall for and taking my breath away. 

I let go of his hand and went to open my car door, but he spontaneously grabbed my hips, spun me and lifted me up onto the bonnet of my BMW. My legs instinctively lifted up and wrapped around his waist. We paused, taking in the unique feeling of the erotic and unusual moment that was unfolding between us.

He then slowly pulled my entire body into his grip, wrapping his arms around my back. He lightly grazed my forehead with his lips, and then ran his nose down along my cheek, as if taking in my smell. Then I felt his warm mouth near my ear. “May I kiss you Norah?” Clint said it so softly, like a wisp of a whisper, and without a second thought, I nodded.

His mouth then found mine as soon as I gave him the go ahead, and he began kissing me gently, relishing in the softness of my full lips. He opened his mouth slightly and I returned his kiss, enjoying the moment, allowing the kiss to naturally gain momentum. My mouth opened and our tongues found each other, slowing stroking at first then fiercely caressing. The kiss got deeper and deeper; my hands gripping on to his shoulders and then sliding down his back. I was completely lost in the connection and reaction our bodies were having. It was like my head was flying through the clouds, and my body was on fire.

What was I doing? I barely know him.

A thought of Josh somehow managed to break into the closed door of my mind. I broke free from the embrace. Clint’s eyes burned as I tried desperately to regain my clarity.

“Whoa, that was… Norah, I, I…” Clint was trying to breathe properly and I was holding my chest.

“I think I should go home now Clint.”

He only nodded and stepped away from me. I think we both needed a moment to register what had just happened.

We were both silent as I drove back to my apartment. I felt like I was in a dream, unable to comprehend my actions. I had spent such a short amount of time with Clint and yet I was strangely drawn to him. I knew deep down that I had only agreed to go on this date to send Josh a message about our friendship. I was still kind of reeling from the de-virgin party and I hoped this date would get back to him through the Lappell, and now I felt like I had thrown that plan completely out the window and had replaced it with wanting to explore this new mind-blowing chemistry I had with Clint.

When we arrived back to the basement of my apartment building, we had still not said a word since the gun range. We sat in my car, quiet and not moving. I could feel the seconds pass as the tension from the silence stretched on. I could not imagine what was going through his mind but I figured it couldn’t have been good, given he had nothing to say.

Then, in complete surprise, he flung himself towards me in the car, his mouth going straight to mine, and I accepted him, welcoming his lips again. It felt like pure instinct and I reacted without hesitation. We kissed with more need this time, and with more force, consuming the moment with bodies as well as our tongues. Our bodies pulled closer to each other and his hands frantically ran through my hair, and then moved down my neck, pulling our chests together as one. I didn’t know what exactly I was doing, but I wanted more and I didn’t want it to stop. When he kissed me, the darkness in me lifted and I felt light. Everything seemed to make sense for the first time in six months.

This time it was Clint who broke away from the kiss first.

“I like you too much, I can’t do this, it’s wrong.” He was panting hard as the words left his mouth. I felt annoyed that he could so suddenly be off hand again.

What the hell was his problem?

“Then go if it’s wrong Clint, I didn’t start all this.” My tone was icy, shielding the hurt from coming through.

He seemed reluctant to get out of the car and grabbed at my hand, but I pulled it away defensively.

What was he doing?
 

Going from hot to cold was doing my head in. Perhaps he thought I was expecting more than what he could give, or perhaps he didn’t think I was good enough for him, but for whatever reason, he clearly wasn’t feeling the same as me.

He looked at my face as if he wanted to say something, but he hesitated, got out of the car, and took off towards the stairs near the elevator that led back up and outside the building. I had an overwhelming urge to cry but forced myself not to. I wasn’t about to shed tears for a guy who had just rejected me like that. Not now, not ever. Instead I used my arm to hit the passenger seat in sheer frustration for allowing myself to open up a fraction to a guy, only to be completely disappointed, again.

***

Almost a week later, I had not seen or heard from Clint, which I hated to admit, did bother me, but I knew I couldn’t let myself turn into one of those girls who analyzed every single moment in a situation, replaying it over and over, trying to create some imaginary reason why a guy hadn’t called or asked me out. No, I’m not one of those girls. If he wasn’t calling or coming around, he wasn’t into me, and didn’t want to see me again. Plain and simple.
C’est la vie.

Pushing all thought of Clint aside, I finally agreed to hang out with Josh. He had come over with beer and pizza and we were going to watch my favorite movie
Closer
with Natalie Portman and Julia Roberts on my flat screen. Josh sat on the floor leaning up against the sofa and I lay stretched out on the sofa behind him, both facing the TV. We had barely touched the pizza, and in the scene when the plaque of ‘Alice Ayres’ flashed up on the screen, I decided it was time to address the huge pink elephant in the room.

“Did you really think I would offer up my virginity to one of those douche-bags, at a party no less?” I had to ask. The question had replayed over and over in my mind since that night. I was still baffled by Josh’s thought process to begin with, especially since he would have known how I would react in finding out.

Josh’s back stiffened at my question, and he swung himself around so he could talk to me properly.

“No I didn’t think you would do anything with anyone at that party, but I thought maybe we,” and he stopped dead in mid sentence.

“And then Clint led you away, and the boys pushed me onto Stephania, and then I thought about getting accepted into the society, and the money, my future, and just acted. I don’t know what I was doing. I was just motivated to get in. I had too much champagne.” He looked stressed, running his hands through his hair. He had obviously replayed the night in his head over and over as much as I had.

“You don’t understand guys Norah, we don’t always think, we just do. It’s hard for us to focus clearly sometimes and we end up just acting on impulse, which isn’t always a smart thing.”

I did understand why he did what he did, but I was still so disappointed.

We were so close.

Josh gave me his best puppy dog eyes. I knew he was sorry; he didn’t have to keep saying it and I didn’t want to punish him any further. He was my best friend and had been there for me more times than I could count on my hands.

“Hmmm… Stephania… really.” I smirked at the name,

Josh looked like a wave of relief had washed over him. It was clear I was playing with him now, mocking his actions, which meant in my language that all was forgiven.

“Yes, I know, I know, Stephania!” We both laughed at the name.

“What kind of girls go to a party with their virginity, knowing it’s on the table for the taking? Is being part of the Lappell that important around here?”

“It’s a very influential and rich club Norah. You of all people should know why women throw themselves at money and power.” 

Yes, I knew that all too well.

It grew silent again and Josh grabbed both my shoulders. “But I promise I will never lie to you, and I will never put you in that type of situation again. I would never want to be put in the same category as your,”

I broke from his grip. “I forgive you Josh, there’s no reason to bring him up, and I’m in no mood to talk about him.”

My body flinched as Josh kept going, “I would hate if you thought of me the same way as him.”

I rubbed his arm reassuringly, “I don't, OK. Just don’t do it again, alright.”

Josh held up his palm and put the other against his chest, “Scout’s honor. Never, ever, again.”

Josh finally pulled me in for a hug. It was nice to be back in the comfort of his arms. His friendship was so important to me. This was a blip on the radar compared to everything we had been through together. To let this ruin a budding relationship, yeah sure, but to let it destroy our friendship, no fucking way!

“So, I heard you went on a date with Clint.” Josh just blurted it out as we finished our hug and let each other go. My eyes darted away guiltily but I shouldn’t have felt any guilt.

Had he been waiting to bring this up?

“Ummm yes, we went to the gun range together. Nothing special.” Josh went still, quietly thinking, and I felt I had to keep talking, “I really don’t think we’ll be seeing each other again.”

Josh visibly relaxed. “I know I don’t have any right to tell you who to date, but Clint Weston; you can do better Norah. I know he is handsome and rich and everything that makes a woman’s head spin, but I don’t like him. I don’t trust him.”

I patted Josh on the head, “Not that it’s any of your business, but I think I can make up my own mind about Clint Weston.”

He simply nodded and we returned to watching the end of the movie, although I could tell he wanted to say a lot more.

Afterwards, we started to tidy up my apartment, putting our empty beer cans in the rubbish bin and plates in the sink. Josh hovered around the kitchen, trying to get my attention as I moved back and forth from the kitchen to the lounge.

“So...Norah. We have another party tomorrow night for the Lappell which involves a new test, since we failed the last one.” I stopped cleaning to look at him, wondering where he was going with this.   

He tried to avoid my eyes as he continued. “And this time, we have to decipher some kind of mental puzzle. It's a mystery or something. I'm not quite sure myself, but I could really use an extra brain with this one, and we are allowed to bring a date, I mean guest.”

I was genuinely shocked that Josh was trying to ask me out again, and to an event held by the Lappell.  

What was he thinking?

“And I know how you feel about the Lappell, but I can assure you that this party doesn’t have anything going on like the  last party, well, not that I am aware of. You know, this might actually be fun for us. Me and you, working together, as friends.” I noticed he struggled in the part when he emphasized the word ‘friends’. I guess hearing about my date with Clint certainly defined to him how I was feeling right now.

I went back and forth in my mind for a few minutes debating between my distate towards the Lappell, and my friendship with Josh. I looked to Josh's forlorn face and those puppy dog eyes that pleaded with me silently. I sighed, and said, “Sure Josh, I’ll be your, guest.”

Chapter 4

Code Words

Slipping on the slinky red dress for the evening, my second-choice dress for the last party, I made an extra effort to look a little more glamorous for the night. Even though I had many reservations about being involved in any party hosted by the Lappell, I wanted my friendship with Josh to get back on solid ground. It still felt like it was flailing from the hit it took from the last party. If Josh was going to be a part of the Lappell, I had to find a way to be accepting of that world, especially since he had always been so accepting of mine.

This time I wouldn’t be completely naïve to the fake niceties projected by this group and I would remind myself that their appearances were nothing more than aesthetic. I don’t know why I wasn’t more wary to begin with. Secret societies were secret because their activities were not normally acceptable by public standards. I almost felt stupid not being more prepared. I guess part of me was still naïve in lots of ways, perhaps because of my youth, although I didn’t discount that to be a bad personality trait of mine. 

Better to have some hope in the good of people than no hope at all.

I also had another motivation for making the extra effort to look nice. I wanted Clint to know his little brush off hadn’t affected me, even though I had not stopped thinking about our date and those kisses for the past week. My cheeks flushed. I really hated that every time I thought of Clint and his lips, my body came alive with heat. It was annoying because I couldn’t do anything about it. Clint had made himself pretty clear about how he felt when he did that dash after our date. I wish he could have just said he wasn’t interested. He didn’t have to be so flaky about it by running away. In any sense, if I saw Clint tonight, I assured myself that I was going to ignore him, and look good doing it.