Pieces in Chance (12 page)

Drew left to meet Jensen in the kitchen, where he was busy stirring at the stove. Sitting on one of the bar seats, she watched him as he moved, admiring him. He wasn’t an overly large man, but his presence seemed to fill any room he was in, making it feel … safe.

“Grilled cheese and tomato soup okay?” he asked her as he set a glass of ice tea on the counter in front of her. She nodded, okay with pretty much anything that wasn’t hospital food. Jensen had done a good job sneaking in food to her – donuts, subs, even tacos once – but her primary diet had included bland, not-so-great meals.

When he was finished the two ate in silence, something that had become familiar to Drew. She still had occasional moments she mourned the complete loss of her hearing, but for the most part had become adjusted to it. Surprisingly, Jensen didn’t seem bothered by her differences at all – when he wasn’t asking new words in ASL, or writing things down on a rare occasion, he spoke to her like he’d probably speak to anyone else. He did slow his words down some, but he didn’t make a huge mockery of her lack of audibility by going into theatrics with it. It was just part of her life, which he had made a part of his.

Her belly full, content and comfortable in the warmth of Jensen’s home, they snuggled on the loveseat and turned on a movie. It didn’t take long before her eyes grew heavy and she motioned for his phone, which he handed over.

Im sorry in advance if I fall asleep. U r 2 comfortable. Mayb we can shop 2morrow?

It was only about three or four, but the thought of going out was lost under the bliss of relaxation she was feeling. Just like they’d rested in the hospital, Jensen was laying long-ways on the sofa, and she was lying along the crack of the cushions beside him. Drew’s head rested on his chest and his arm was around her waist. Nothing seemed important enough to move, especially not clothes or having to deal with anyone.

After what seemed like forever, Jensen passed the phone back to her awkwardly, both of them functioning with only one hand.

Fine with me. I don’t want to move. I never realized my couch was this comfortable… but then, maybe it’s because I have you here.

Smiling to herself, she nuzzled against him, happier than she’d been in longer than she could remember. No longer did she have any tubes or open wounds to watch out for, nor did they have to deal with the constant interruption of nurses for check-ups. Here it was just Drew and Jensen.

<3

She handed the phone back quickly, before she could change her mind and erase the heart she’d just typed. It wasn’t a declaration of love, but it was more than the smile she’d give him before. The truth was though, she needed him to know she felt more for him than just friendship. Besides, in her mind, friends didn’t cuddle the way they were, so entwined with each other and comfortable enough to sleep. To sleep meant to trust, which was a gift she didn’t give lightly.

It wasn’t until she awoke a couple hours later, to Jensen still napping, that she saw his reply.

You own my <3.

Three weeks passed and between them, Drew and Jensen eventually fell into a routine. When he worked morning shift, the two had breakfast together before he left. Drew spent her days either working on her school work, trying to graduate without attending classes anymore since she’d missed so much, or reading. Occasionally she’d walk, finding peace in the fresh air.

Evenings were livelier. Sometimes Jensen would take Drew out to eat or sometimes he cooked for them. Regardless of what they did, he found ways to surprise her. He’d even researched and bought tickets to a silent movie right outside of Jackson during one of his weekends off. It was old, in black and white, but the entire show was done in subtitles, making her feel like she missed nothing since everyone in the small theater was having to read as well.

With the help of Carrigan, Drew had finally gotten access to the money she had in the bank. After getting over the shock of the decimal points there, she’d agreed to go shopping while Jensen was at work. When looking for, and finding, the keys to his Jeep, she couldn’t help but laugh.

“Dear Drew,

I know you do
not
have a license. Do
not
take my Jeep, which is in the garage, with a full tank of gas. The key is
not
the large silver one that is unlabeled because a dog I had once chewed the black stuff off it. I repeat, do
not
take this set of keys, leave the door unlocked, and drive the Jeep to get clothes.

… on a more serious note – get what you need and drive safe, please. I do
not
want a call that something happened to you.

I’ll be seeing you beautiful,

Jensen.”

It was so like him, she could almost picture his face as he said the exact words on the paper. His face would scrunch as if he were serious, but his lips would pinch at the sides, trying to hold his smile back and look macho. It was an expression she’d grown familiar with and adored it.

So, off she’d gone, on the great search for something to wear that actually fit. That day, Drew learned something about herself – she hated shopping. Once upon a time, in a lifetime before shit got real, she’d loved buying pretty things, looking her best and accessorizing. Now, it was a chore that after the first store of finding nothing, she wanted to give up and seek refuge in Jensen’s shorts and T-shirts.

In truth, he’d been more than willing to go with her, but she’d turned it down. Drew had used the excuse she didn’t want him to spend his own money – which was true – but she also didn’t want to force him into feeling like he needed to cheer her up. She knew after putting on the dress he’d bought her at the hospital that fit was going to be hard; what she hadn’t anticipated was her complete indifference to everything. It all looked the same, and she had no idea where to start. Ruby, the store clerk, had stared at her for a long while before approaching her, but when she did, she wouldn’t meet Drew’s gaze.

It took five long, excruciating hours for Drew to find a handful of clothes that would work and fit well enough to buy. Panties and bras, though, were in short supply unless she went to the local Five and Dime, which she refused to do. Luckily when she’d been just about to give up and spend the rest of her days pretending she was an army commander, she bumped into Stella, Officer Carrigan’s wife.

“Stella,” Drew called, hoping she wasn’t screaming. Speaking aloud had gotten easier with Jensen, or maybe she was more comfortable with him, but she was self-conscious about getting the woman’s attention.

Luck was on her side because the woman turned, a smile growing on her face as she took Drew in. She quickly embraced her before stepping back, awkwardly signing,
“How are you?”

Drew couldn’t help but chuckle. “I’m okay, really. And if you talk I can read your lips – no need to try to sign.”

“Oh, my dear, I’ve been trying to learn. We want to have you over for dinner but I wanted you to actually
want
to come,” the woman told her, clearly concentrating on her words and making Drew wrack her brain to remember if she naturally spoke a million miles a minute or if she was just nervous.

“Sure. Let Jensen know when and I’ll be there,” Drew told her, pausing for a moment before continuing. “Hey, could I ask a favor?”

“Of course,” Stella said quickly, surprise alighting her face.

“Um … where can I buy underwear in this town that wasn’t designed for the grandmas over at Calvary?”

Drew knew her face was turning twelve shades of pink at asking the question and the thoughts it could raise. Six months ago she wouldn’t have cared if she was wearing granny panties that came up above her belly button. But now, well … it wasn’t like she was planning anything, really. She merely wanted something pretty – hoping that it would make her feel the same. And, if something
were
to happen, she didn’t want to be caught in something embarrassing.

Stella stared at her for a heartbeat before a kind softness crossed her expression. “Of course, dear. Head on down to Lace by Grace over on B and 2nd and tell Lucy I sent you. She will help get you taken care of. I’m off to pick Glory up from the babysitter before Tommy gets done with his shift. I’ll get details to Jensen soon, okay?”

Drew nodded and they hugged again before going their separate ways. And, much to her surprise, her trip to Lace by Grace was much easier than the clothing choices. Lucy was a whirlwind, newer to town, and not at all put off by Drew’s inability to hear. She continued on, never stopping talking, often entirely too fast for her to follow, but Drew was still grateful. It felt … normal. She’d left smiling as she climbed into Jensen’s Jeep, and drove back to his house.

It was about seven when the lights flashed, the signal Jensen had created to inform Drew he was home so he wouldn’t startle her. The flashing pulled Drew’s attention from the book she’d been trying to read. In truth, she’d been thinking about Jensen and his ‘you own my heart’ comment he’d made weeks ago. Neither had brought it back up, and nothing had changed. They lived together, laughed together, and slept – only slept – together almost every night, whether on the couch or in bed. It was only on nights he took shift that she slept alone.

As he entered the living room, she watched as he hung his rig up by the door, as was his routine, and made a beeline for her. She expected him to tell her hello, to ask her how her day was, but something was different today. When he reached her, he dropped to his knees, his arms going around her waist and his head in her lap. Something was very wrong.

“Jens?” she asked, playing with his hair as he remained where he was. Drew didn’t want to admit that her heart was beginning to speed, beating frantically in her chest. It was one of the downsides of having feelings for someone in his profession. Chance wasn’t exactly a crime capital, but it had its fair share, and the department was only so big. The possibility of him being involved with something big, or one of his co-worker friends, was more than she cared to think.

The strong man didn’t budge, his hands clutching at her shirt to hold her to him. Drew stopped trying to get his attention and instead held him, letting him know the only way she could that she was there for him. Whatever had happened had rattled the man – it wasn’t going to be good, whatever it was, because he wasn’t easily stirred up. She visually examined him, making sure she found no blood on his uniform, whether it be his or not. Not finding any, she breathed a bit easier.

An eternity passed before he finally lifted his head to look at her, his face ashen and eyes red. She opened her mouth, wanting to make sure he was okay, to find out what was wrong, but she didn’t get the chance. He tugged sharply at her waist, pulling her down onto his lap on the floor, and crushed his lips to hers. In mere seconds, his tongue had her opening for him, allowing him to explore her mouth, letting him overtake him.

Most of their embraces were soft and tender, gentle. This one, though, was reminiscent to their first real kiss, when they’d lost themselves for the first time. His hands were trailing Drew’s waist, her sides, her breasts, while she wrapped her arms around his neck, holding him tightly as she kissed him back. Her breath caught as air touched her bare skin, a heartbeat before Jensen’s hands were there, warmth replacing the cool.

Drew followed suit, lifting herself from his lap long enough to pull his shirt from his waistband, their lips never parting. Fingers moving frantically, she unfastened each button, almost groaning in relief when the final opened and she pulled it down from his shoulders. She tugged at his undershirt until she found his skin and sighed into his mouth. Jensen nipped at her lips before breaking the kiss.