Philippa Gregory 3-Book Tudor Collection 1 (181 page)

The lady in waiting Jane Boleyn seems troubled and I tell her that she can sit beside me and I ask her, in English, if she is well.

She beckons my translator to come and sit with us, and she says that she is troubled by a matter of some delicacy.

I think it must be something about precedence at the wedding, they are so anxious about the order of the service and what jewels everyone may wear. I nod as if it is a serious matter and ask her if I may serve her.

‘On the contrary; I am anxious to be of service to you,' she says, speaking quietly to Lotte. She translates for me, I nod. ‘I hear that your ambassadors have forgotten to bring the contract that releases you from a previous betrothal.'

‘What?' I speak so sharply that she guesses the meaning of the German word, and nods, her face as grave as my own.

‘So they have not told you?'

I shake my head. ‘Nothing,' I say in English. ‘They tell nothing.'

‘Then I am glad to speak with you before you are ill-advised,' she says rapidly and I wait as the words are translated. She leans forwards and takes my hands. Her clasp is warm, her face intent. ‘When they ask you about your previous betrothal you must tell them that it was annulled, and that you have seen the document,' she says earnestly. ‘If they ask why your brother failed to send it, you can say
that you don't know, that it is not your responsibility to bring the papers – as indeed it was not.'

I am breathless; something about her intensity makes me feel fearful. I cannot think why my brother should be so careless of my marriage, then I remember his constant resentment of me. He has betrayed his own plan from malice; at the last moment he could not bear to let me go smoothly from him.

‘I see you are shocked,' she says. ‘Dearest Lady Anne, be warned by me, and never let them think for a moment that there is no document, that you have a previous betrothal still in place. You must tell a powerful and convincing lie. You must tell them that you have seen the documents and that your previous betrothal was definitely annulled.'

‘But it was,' I say slowly. I repeat in English so she cannot be mistaken. ‘I have seen the document. It is not a lie. I am free to marry.'

‘You are certain?' she asks intently. ‘These things can be done without a girl knowing what plans are made. No-one would blame you if you were at all uncertain. You can tell me. Trust me. Tell me the truth.'

‘It was cancelled,' I say again. ‘I know that it was cancelled. The betrothal was my father's plan; but not my brother's. When my father was ill and then died, then my brother ruled, and the betrothal was finished.'

‘Why do you not have the document, then?'

‘My brother,' I start. ‘My foolish brother … My brother is careless of my well-being,' Lotte rapidly translates. ‘And my father died so recently, and my mother is so distressed, there has been too much for him to do. My brother has the document in our records room, I myself have seen it; but he must have forgotten to send it. There was so much to arrange.'

‘If you are in any doubt at all you must tell me,' she cautions me. ‘And I can advise you what best we should do. You see from my
coming to you and advising you that I am utterly loyal to you. But if there is any chance that your brother does not have the document you must tell me, Lady Anne, tell me for your own safety, and I will plan with you what we can best do.'

I shake my head. ‘I thank you for your care of me but there is no need. I have seen the documents myself, and so have my ambassadors,' I say. ‘There is no impediment, I know I am free to marry the king.'

She nods as if she is still waiting for something else. ‘I am so glad.'

‘And I want to marry the king.'

‘If you wished to avoid the marriage, now you have seen him, you could do so,' she says very quietly. ‘This is your chance to escape. If you did not like him, you could get safely home, with no word against you. I could help you. I could tell them that you had told me that you are not certain, that you may be pre-contracted.'

I withdraw my hands from hers. ‘I do not want to escape,' I say simply. ‘This is a great honour for me and my country, and a great joy for me.'

Jane Boleyn looks sceptical.

‘Truly,' I say. ‘I long to be Queen of England, I am coming to love this country and I want to make my life here.'

‘Indeed?'

‘Yes, on my honour.' I hesitate and then I tell her the greatest reason. ‘I was not very happy at my home,' I admit. ‘I was not highly regarded or well treated. Here I can be somebody, I can do good. At home I will never be more than an unwanted sister.'

She nods. Many women know what it is to be in the way while the great affairs of men go on without them.

‘I want to have a chance,' I say. ‘I want to have a chance to be the woman I can be. Not my brother's creature, not my mother's daughter. I want to stay here and grow into myself.'

She is silent for a moment, I am surprised at the depth of my own feeling. ‘I want to be a woman in my own right,' I say.

‘A queen is not free,' she points out.

‘She is better than a duke's disliked sister.'

‘Very well,' she says quietly.

‘I suppose the king must be angry with my ambassadors for forgetting the papers?' I ask.

‘I am sure that he is,' she says, her eyes slide sideways. ‘But they will give their word that you are free to marry and I am sure it will all go ahead.'

‘There is no possibility of the marriage being delayed?' I am surprised at my own feeling. I have such a strong sense that I can do much for this country, that I can be a good queen here. I want to start at once.

‘No,' she says. ‘The ambassadors and the king's council will resolve it. I am sure.'

I pause. ‘He does want to marry me?'

She smiles at me and touches my hand. ‘Of course he does. This is just a small difficulty. The ambassadors will undertake to produce the document and the marriage will go ahead. Just as long as you are certain that the document is there?'

‘It is there,' I say, and I am speaking nothing but the truth. ‘I can swear to it.'

I am to help the queen to dress for her wedding and I have to get up extremely early to get everything ready, I would rather not get up early, but it is nice to be singled out from the other girls who sleep so late and so lazy. Really it's very bad of them to lie in bed so late when some of us are up and working for Lady Anne. Truly, everyone but me is completely idle.

I lay out her dress as she is washing in her closet. Catherine Carey helps me spread out the skirt and the underskirts on the closed chest as Mary Norris goes for her jewels. The skirt is enormous, like a great fat spinning top, I would rather die than marry in a dress like this; the greatest beauty in the world could not help but look like a pudding, waddling out to be eaten. It is hardly worth being queen if you have to go around like a tent, I think. The cloth is extremely fine – cloth of gold – and it is heavy with the most wonderful pearls, and she has a coronet to wear. Mary has put it out before the mirror and if no-one else was here I would try it on, but already, though it is so early, there are half a dozen of us, servants and maids and ladies in waiting, and so I have to give it a little polish and leave it alone. It is very finely wrought, she brought it from Cleves with her and she told me that the spiky bits are supposed to be rosemary, which her own sister wore as a fresh herb in her hair at her wedding. I say it looks like a crown of thorns and
her lady secretary gives me a sharp look and doesn't translate my remark. Just as well, really.

She will wear her hair loose and when she comes out of the bathroom she sits before her silver looking-glass, and Catherine brushes her hair with long, smooth strokes, like you would a horse's tail. She is fair-haired, to be just to her she is quite golden-haired, and wrapped in a bath sheet and glowing from her wash, she looks well this morning. She is a little pale, but she smiles at all of us, and she seems happy enough. If I were her I would be dancing for joy to be Queen of England. But I suppose she is not the dancing sort.

Off she goes for the wedding and we all fall in behind her in strict order of importance, which means that I am so far back it is hardly worth my while being there, nobody will be able to see me, even though I am wearing my new gown that is trimmed with silver thread, the most costly thing I have ever owned. It is a very pale grey-blue, and suits my eyes. I never looked better; but it is not my wedding and nobody pays any attention to me at all.

Archbishop Cranmer is to marry them: drone, drone, drone, like an old bee. He asks them if there is any reason why they cannot be married, and if we, the congregation, know of any impediment and we all say very cheerfully, ‘no we don't', and I suppose only I am fool enough to wonder what would happen if someone said, ‘stop the wedding, for the king has had three wives already and none of them died of old age!' but of course, nobody does.

If she had any sense, she should be alarmed. It is hardly a very reassuring record. He is a great man of course, and his will is the will of God, of course; but he has had three wives and all of them dead. It's not much of a prospect for a bride, when I come to think about it. But I don't think she thinks like that. Probably nobody thinks like this unless they are as stupid as me.

They are married and go off to hear Mass in the king's private closet and the rest of us wait around with nothing to do, which is, I find, one of the main activities at court. There is a very handsome
young man whose name happens to be John Beresby and he manages to work his way through the people so that he is standing behind me.

‘I am dazzled,' he says.

‘I don't know what by,' I say pertly. ‘It is hardly daybreak, it is so early.'

‘Not by the sun, but by the greater light of your beauty.'

‘Oh, that,' I say and give him a little smile.

‘You are new to court?'

‘Yes, I am Katherine Howard.'

‘I am John Beresby.'

‘I know.'

‘You know? You have asked someone my name?'

‘Not at all,' I say. Though it is a lie. I noticed him that first day at Rochester, and I asked Lady Rochford who he was.

‘You have asked after me,' he says delightedly.

‘Don't flatter yourself,' I say crushingly.

‘Tell me that I may at least dance with you later, at the wedding feast.'

‘Perhaps,' I say.

‘I shall take that as a promise,' he whispers, and then the door opens and the king comes out with Lady Anne and we all curtsey very low because she is queen now, and a married woman, and I can't help but think that though that is very nice for her, it would have been much better if she had worn a gown with a long train.

So it is done. I am Queen of England. I am a wife. I sit on the right hand of my husband the king at the wedding feast and I smile down the hall so that everyone, my ladies, the lords at their tables, the common people in the gallery, everyone can see that I am happy to be their queen and that I will be a good queen and a merry wife.

Archbishop Cranmer performed the service according to the rites of the Holy Catholic Church in England, so I feel a little uneasy in my conscience. This is not bringing the country closer to the reformed religion as I promised my brother and my mother that I would do. My advisor, the Count Overstein, stands beside me and when there is a break in the dinner I remark quietly to him that I hope he and the lords of Cleves are not disappointed at my failure to lead the king to reform.

He says that I will be allowed to practise my faith as I wish, in private, but the king does not want to be troubled with matters of theology on his wedding day. He says that the king seems firm in keeping the church that he has made, which is Catholic but denies the leadership of the Pope. The king is as opposed to reformers as he is to fervent Papists.

‘But surely we could have found a form of words that could have suited both of us?' I remark. ‘My brother was anxious that I should support the reform of the church in England.'

He makes a grimace. ‘The reform of the church is not as we understood it,' he says, and from the closed line of his mouth I take it that he wants to say no more.

‘Certainly, it seems to have been a profitable process,' I remark tentatively, thinking of the great houses that we stayed in on the way from Deal which were clearly former monasteries, or abbeys, and the medicine gardens around them being dug over for flowers, and the farms which fed the poor but are now being converted into parkland for hunting.

‘When we were at home we thought it was a godly process,' he says shortly. ‘We did not realise it was drenched in blood.'

‘I cannot believe that to tear down the shrines where simple people liked to say their prayers can lead them closer to God,' I say. ‘And what is the profit in forbidding them from lighting candles to remember their loved ones?'

‘Earthly profit as well as spiritual,' he says. ‘The church's tithes are not lifted, they are just paid to the king. But it is not for us to remark on how the country of England chooses to say its prayers.'

‘My brother …'

‘Your brother would have done better to look to his own record keeping,' he says, in sudden irritation.

‘What?'

‘He should have sent the letter which released you from your promise to marry the Duke of Lorraine's son.'

‘It didn't matter that much, did it?' I ask. ‘The king has said nothing of it to me.'

‘We had to swear that we knew of its existence, and then we had to swear that it would be sent within three months, and then we had to swear that we ourselves would be hostage for it. If your brother does not find it and send it, God knows what will happen to us.'

I am aghast. ‘They cannot hold you to ransom for my brother's record keeping? They cannot really think that there was an impediment?'

He shakes his head. ‘They know full well that you are free to marry and that the marriage is valid. But for some reason known only to themselves, they choose to throw a doubt over it all, and your brother's error in letting us come without it has allowed that doubt. And we have been most cruelly embarrassed.'

I turn my eyes down. My brother's resentment of me goes against his own interests, goes against the interests of his own country, even against the interests of his own religion. I can feel my temper rise at the thought of him jeopardising my very marriage from his jealousy and spite. He is such a fool, he is such a wicked fool. ‘He is careless,' is all that I say; but I hear my voice shake.

‘This is not a king to be careless with,' the count warns.

I nod, I am very conscious of the king sitting in silence on my left. He cannot understand German but I do not want him to look at me and see me anything other than happy.

‘I am sure I shall be very content,' I say, smiling, and the count bows and goes back to his place.

The entertainment is finished and the archbishop rises from his place at the table. My councillors have prepared me for this moment and when the king rises to his feet, I know that I have to get up too. The two of us follow my lord Cranmer to the king's great chamber and stand in the doorway while the archbishop walks around the room, swinging the censer and sprinkling the bed with holy water. This really is most superstitious and outlandish. I don't know what my mother would say; but I know she would not like it.

Then the archbishop closes his eyes and starts to pray. Beside me, Count Overstein whispers a rapid translation. ‘He prays for the two of you to sleep well and not be troubled with demonic dreams.' I make sure that my expression is one of interest and devotion. But I can hardly keep my face straight. Are these the people who have
closed down shrines to stop people praying for miracles and yet here in a palace they have to pray for protection against dreams of demons? What sense can one make of them?

‘He prays that you will not suffer from infertility, nor the king from impotence, he prays that the power of Satan will not unman the king nor unwoman you.'

‘Amen,' I say promptly, as if anyone could believe this nonsense. Then I turn to my ladies and they escort me from the room to my own chamber where I will change into my nightgown.

When I come back the king is standing with his court beside the great bed, and the archbishop is still praying. The king is in his nightshirt with a great handsome cloak lined with fur thrown over his shoulders. He has laid aside his hose and I can see the bulky bandage on his leg where he has an open wound. The bandage is clean and fresh, thank God, but even so the smell of the wound seeps into the bedchamber to mingle, sickeningly, with the smell of incense. The prayers seem to have been going on while we both changed our clothes. Really, you would have thought that we were safe from demonic dreams and impotence by now. My ladies step forwards and slip my cloak from my shoulders. I am dressed only in my nightshift before the whole court and I am so mortified and embarrassed that I could almost wish myself back at Cleves.

Lady Rochford quickly lifts the covers from the bed to shield me from their inquisitive stares and I slip between them and sit up with my back against the pillows. On the other side of the bed a young man, Thomas Culpepper, kneels for Henry to lean on his shoulder and another man takes the king's elbow to push him upwards. King Henry grunts like a weary carthorse as he hauls himself into bed. The bed dips at his great weight and I have to make an ungainly little wriggle and grab the side to stop myself rolling over towards him.

The archbishop raises his hands above his head for a final blessing and I look straight ahead. Katherine Howard's bright face catches
my eye, she has her hands pressed together, held against her lips as if devoutly praying, but she is clearly struggling not to giggle. I pretend I have not seen her, for fear that she should set me laughing too, and when the archbishop completes his prayers I say: ‘Amen.'

They all go then, thank God. There is no suggestion that they should watch the marriage being consummated, but I know that they will need to see the sheets in the morning and know that it has been done. This is the nature of the royal marriage. That, and marrying a man old enough to be your father, who you hardly know.