Philippa (13 page)

“I wear it down as do others,” Philippa said, “but I like that French style Annie showed to Lucy so long ago. It is very elegant.”

“Uncle Thomas says I am too young yet for such a style,” Banon told her older sister. “Do you think he is right?”

“Wait,” Philippa counseled her sibling. “There is time to look older, for that is what you want to do, isn’t it?” She smiled at Banon.

Banon nodded. “How did you know?” she asked.

“Because I felt the same way when I went to court for the first time, but Lucy advised me to keep my hair down always so I might look younger, and none would trifle with me. She said I needed to learn the ways of the court first, and that would give me time. She was right, of course, but when you come to court you will have me to watch over you. And my friends too.”

“You are anxious to return, aren’t you?” Banon said.

“Aye!”

“When will it be?” Banon asked.

“I do not know. Uncle Thomas has said I must be patient, and he will solve the difficulty. I must trust that he will although I will admit to growing impatient of late,” Philippa admitted.

The end of September came, and Logan Hepburn announced on Michaelmas that he would take his family home on the first day of October. “You are welcome to come, Philippa,” he told the girl.

Stricken, she looked to Lord Cambridge.

It was time, Thomas Bolton thought, and then he began to speak. “I think I have the answer to the difficulties that the FitzHughs have unwittingly caused our own family,” he began.

“Tell us!” Rosamund said eagerly.

“The solution may not please everyone, but it will please Philippa, dear cousin, and it is her happiness we must concern ourselves with now. Would you not agree?” His eyes met hers sympathetically, and Rosamund knew she was not going to like what he said, but she nodded in the affirmative. “Philippa has said most strongly that she does not wish the burden of Friarsgate on her shoulders. She feels her happiness lies at court, and not here in Cumbria. We have discussed this several times over the last few weeks, and her mind is quite made up in the matter.”

“Not want Friarsgate? The lass is daft!” Logan said, half angrily, and knowing how this was hurting his beloved Rosamund. What the hell was the matter with Philippa? He should have made a match for the lass himself, and had her married off with no nonsense about it, but Rosamund would not allow it. Now look what was happening!

“And what conclusions have you come to, Tom?” Rosamund asked her cousin. She was very pale, and her voice was almost frail.

“We must allow Philippa to find her future at court, which is what she wants. As she has pointed out to me, cousin, you and I have profited very well from our cloth trade. We will take some of this profit and give Philippa a generous dower portion. And I will find a small estate in the south that I can purchase for her. That way she will be landed as well as dowered. Under those circumstances a husband can certainly be found for her, for she must be wed like all respectable lasses. And she will have the time she needs to choose a man who, like her, prefers life and service at court. There are many such couples at court, dear girl, as we both know. I think this is the perfect solution to all our problems. Will you agree?”

“But what of Friarsgate?” Rosamund said softly.

“What of Friarsgate?” Philippa exploded. “What of me, mama? Can I not just this once come before your damned Friarsgate?” She was near to tears.

Rosamund looked stricken at the rebuke.

“Do not speak to your mother in that tone, Philippa Meredith!” Logan Hepburn roared. He put a protective arm about his wife. “She has given her life to Friarsgate and its well-being. Yet you stand there boldly and throw the gift she would give you back in her face. I do not understand you, lass.”

“Nay, you don’t,” Philippa agreed angrily. “None of you do except Uncle Thomas! What is so difficult for you to understand? I am like my father, Owein Meredith. I am happy to be in service to my queen as he was content to be in service to his king. But I cannot do that if I am burdened with Friarsgate.” She turned to her mother. “You will, God willing, live many more years, mama, but the truth is that you are spending less and less time at Friarsgate, and Friarsgate needs its mistress. Your husband is a Scot. Your sons are Scots. Two of Owein Meredith’s daughters are grown now, and Banon is already mistress of Otterly. She is happy to be so, and has told me she will wed a northerner one day. I wish to remain in the south. Please, I beg of you, let me do so. I would rather be dead than take on the responsibility of Friarsgate. Let me go, mama. Let me go, and be happy as you have been, as you are, happy.” Philippa’s hazel eyes were wet with unshed tears. She held out her hands in supplication to her mother.

Her daughter’s words had been like knives cutting her to pieces. What had it all been for if not for her children? She had so carefully husbanded and protected Friarsgate and its people. What had it all been for then? But Philippa’s face told Rosamund that she could not, would not, be moved in her determination. Well, there was always Banon. She could one day care for both estates. But now was not the time to discuss it, Rosamund knew. She was tired with this confinement, and depressed by what was happening. She didn’t want to discuss it any longer. She focused her amber eyes on her eldest child. “You are certain?” she asked, knowing, as she did, the answer.

Philippa nodded.

“Then go and find your own happiness, Philippa. I will not stop you.” She turned to her cousin. “What would I do without you, Tom? You will handle all the arrangements in this matter?”

Thomas Bolton came and sat next to Rosamund. He took her hand in his, and kissed it tenderly. “I will make everything perfect, darling girl,” he promised her, keeping her little hand in his embrace. “Why, it is long past time I paid a visit to court. I find I am growing bored, and need the company of clever amusing people for a time again. And Banon must come with us. A bit of polish will do her no harm. And who knows? One of the northern families may be at court seeking to find a pretty, rich wife for one of their younger sons. The match must be made when we can make it, Rosamund. Your hesitation with Philippa was a mistake. Would you not agree?”

She nodded. “Aye, it was.”

“But I will repair the damage done, darling girl,” he told her cheerfully. “Now you must go home to Claven’s Carn, and be cosseted by this man of yours until this next son of yours is born. I think you have borne enough bairns now, Rosamund.” He kissed her little hand again and released it, turning to Logan Hepburn as he did so. “Four healthy sons is more than many men have, Logan. Remember that you must provide one way or another for them all. And think how lonely your old age would be, my good friend, if you were alone.”

“I suspect I will never be alone as long as you live, Cousin Tom,” the laird of Claven’s Cam said with a grin, “but I agree that four lads is a goodly number.”

“Rosamund?” Lord Cambridge looked at his cousin questioningly.

She nodded. “Neither of you will be without me in our old age,” she said, and the color was coming back into her pale cheeks, and a small smile was turning up the corners of her mouth. “Forgive me for frightening you both. I am just more tired this time than I have been in the past. I must remember I am no longer a girl.” She laughed. “And too, the shock of Philippa’s decision has not been easy.”

Philippa came and knelt by her mother’s knee. “Mama, I am sorry for my words. You know that I love you, but I am different than you are. Strange, isn’t it, that you who raised me with such a strong sense of duty should be surprised when that duty would take me elsewhere. Yet it has, and my sense of responsibility in my service to the queen is every bit as strong as yours is for Friarsgate. Can you understand that?” The young woman looked anxiously into her mother’s face for some sign of comprehension.

“I suppose,” Rosamund said softly, “that that is a mistake many parents make. They expect their children to be as they are because they have raised those children with their values. Yet when a child interprets those values differently we are surprised.” She smiled at Philippa, and put a gentle hand on her face. “You have fought every bit as hard for what you want, my daughter, as I did for what I wanted. I cannot fault you then, can I? You go with my blessing, Philippa Meredith, even if I am saddened by your decision. You were born of the love I had for your father. I would do his memory a great disservice if I did not allow you that which would make you happy.”

“Thank you, mama!” Philippa said, and the joy in her voice was most evident.

“Well, thank heavens that is settled now, my darling girls,” Lord Cambridge said with a feigned sigh of relief. “God’s foot, my dear! There is ever so much to do before we dare show ourselves in public. Banon must have a whole new wardrobe of gowns for court, wouldn’t you agree, Philippa dearest? And I shall have to dig into my coffers for jewelry. And while I know your garments are awaiting you at the London house, Philippa, surely you could do with a few new gowns yourself, my pet? And men’s fashions have certainly changed in the last several years. Philippa, you will have to direct my tailor. I will not appear before the king unless I am certainly dressed as has always befitted my reputation as an elegant gentleman. Will you come with us to Otterly so all these preparations may be effected? It is a bit south, so you will be even closer to your beloved court.” He chortled. “Rosamund, my angel, it is just like the bad old days, and I can hardly contain myself considering the adventures to come!”

Rosamund burst out laughing. “Oh, cousin,” she said, “I am not certain I should entrust my girls to your tender care. They will have far too much fun, and begin to believe that their lives should always be filled with merriment and beautiful clothing.”

“Did I not care well for you?” he reminded her.

“Oh, yes,” she agreed. “No one was ever kinder and more generous to me, dearest cousin. I almost envy my daughters the wonderful times they will have with you. Almost,” she finished with a little smile. She suddenly felt happy again.

Logan Hepburn was not in the least offended by his wife’s words, for he knew them to be the truth. No one had ever taken such loving care of Rosamund until her cousin, Tom, had come into her life. They were more older brother and younger sister in their affection for one another. “Then we shall go home to Claven’s Cam tomorrow, and your heart will be at rest, lovey, knowing that Philippa’s future is safe with Tom.”

She nodded.

That evening their supper in the hall was merrier than anyone had known in a very long time at Friarsgate. Philippa was quite the storyteller, entertaining them all with amusing anecdotes of her life at court. Banon was filled with questions that her mother, her eldest sister, and Lord Cambridge answered. The Hepburn sons, though little, had been allowed at the high board tonight as a treat. When they became restless they were allowed to play before the fire. Jamie shared his beef bone with one of Thomas Bolton’s dogs, taking a bite, and then offering a bite to the canine, an enormous wolfhound with a fortunately gentle disposition. The little boy’s innocent actions set his elders to laughing.

“Why, the beastie could eat the lad in two bites,” Maybel cackled, “but is the bairn not sweet, sharing his dinner with the creature?”

Elizabeth Meredith sat and watched her family with curiosity. It had been a long time since the hall had rung with laughter, longer still since her whole family had been together. And tomorrow they would all be gone again, and she would be alone. Though sometimes she accompanied her mother to Claven’s Cam, she had decided she preferred her own home at Friarsgate. She didn’t care that she would be alone. She would have Maybel and Edmund to watch over her. Father Mata would continue to teach her, although he said she was learning faster than her sisters had, and there would soon be little left he could teach her. And there was Hans Steen, who was continuing to teach her German and Dutch. She would be happy to see them all gone, Bessie thought, so her life might get back to normal. She still had not come to like Philippa again, and she had nothing in common with Banon any longer. They were sisters in blood only. And that was enough.

The following day dawned clear. Rosamund was ready at first light to begin her trek home to Claven’s Cam. She bid each of her daughters farewell individually, and in their turn. “I will make no decision regarding Friarsgate for now,” she told Philippa. “I know you think you won’t, but you might change your mind about it. I just want you happy, my daughter.”

“I won’t change my mind, mama, but I think you wise to wait before deciding what you will do. It is a valuable inheritance for whoever will get it. I am happy in my choices, but remember that I always love you.” Philippa hugged her mother. Then lowering her voice she said, “I know what Uncle Thomas was saying to you yesterday. Can you prevent conceiving another bairn after this one is born?”

Rosamund nodded. “I’ll tell you someday when the time is right. If you marry, Philippa, bring your husband to meet me. I know Tom will guide you in your choices.”

“I will,” Philippa promised. Mother and daughter hugged a final time.

“Now, Banon,” Rosamund said to her second daughter, “listen to your uncle, and obey his advice. He is a wise man. Wiser than your sister, though she thinks she knows it all. She doesn’t. Take your uncle’s counsel first.”

“I will, mama,” Banon replied. “Philippa’s choices will not be my choices. And I shall be home to Otterly in the spring, for I take my responsibilities there seriously. Uncle Tom says the manor could not have a better mistress than me,” she finished proudly.

“I am certain he is right,” Rosamund said. “Send to me when you return.”

“I will,” Banon said, and hugged her mother. “And send to me, mama, when you have birthed my new brother.”

Rosamund nodded, and turned to Bessie. “Are you sure you won’t come with me?” she asked her youngest daughter.