Perfect Summer (9 page)

“Yes,”
I groaned. “I want you now.”

“How
much?” he asked.

“All
the way,” I said. “You’ve always wanted me, was always good to me, good for me.
Why shouldn’t I want you, Nat?”

“Are
you sure?” Nat asked.

“Yes,”
I said, not able to think straight with his fingers moving against me, in me,
and causing all kinds of heated sensations deep from the core of me.

“Good,”
Nat said, his voice choked up yet full of desire. “I want you so badly, it
hurts. I want you so much I can’t think of anything else. You are my stars and
sky, Summer. I love you so much!” With that he drove into me from behind,
causing me to almost fall flat on my face. With a passion neither of us knew we
had for each other, we kept going, he kept pleasuring me, until we couldn’t
tell if it was morning, noon, or night.

*****

Nat spent the
entire weekend with me, cooking for me, running with me on the beach, and
making love to me at night.

He left Monday
morning to fly back to San Francisco, but left me with a charm bracelet he
brought me from Tiffany’s. It was filled with little charms already – a
starfish, a pirate ship, a princess crown, and a small heart. “It’s to remember
me when I’m not here, Summer,” he said. “Now I have to go, but I’ll call you
tonight.” He kissed me on top of my head and then on my lips before heading
off.

Nat was
everything I had always imagined him to be when he finally let down his guards
and succumb to what he felt for me. He was perfect. He made me feel perfect
when we were together…but why did I still feel incomplete?

Chapter
8

            “
B
eing with Nat like that kept me in a cloud for
almost the entire week. He was so much sexier than I’ve ever imagine. Much more
romantic than the responsible and no-nonsense Nat I’ve known for years. Finally
doing the deed with him and losing my virginity to him brought me to a new
awareness of myself as a woman and my needs as one. I realized now that Nat had
truly grown up, become a man over the years, in more ways than one.

            As
I sat in Professor Standish’s class, absently playing with my charm bracelet, I
barely noticed Drew slipping into the seat next to me.

            “Nice
bracelet,” Drew said, fingering it. “Looks like something Astor would get you…”

            “No,”
I said. “Not from Astor. But that doesn’t make it too expensive for me to
accept, too. I might return it, but it would only hurt his feelings.”

            “Nat,
then,” Drew said unusually indifferently. “He doesn’t hand out gifts like
candy, Summer. If he gave you that charm bracelet as a gift, then it meant a
lot to him that you accept it.”

            I
nodded. “Thanks, Drew. I’ll keep it then. I really like the thought and details
he put into it more than anything.” I showed him the pirate charm, the
starfish, and even the princess one.

            “Cute,”
Drew said drily. “Such attention to details. So very Nat.”

            I
could hear the bit of jealousy hidden in his false cheerfulness and turned to
him. “Drew, nice to see you back here for class. Why are you here sitting with
me instead of up there with your harem?”

            Drew
turned serious eyes to me, and said, “Just wanted to see how you’re doing.
How’s your arm?”

            “Good,”
I said. “I’m doing great, and my arm…” I moved it a little, “it’s
healing…that’s all I can say about that. I don’t think there’s anything else I
could do to get it to heal faster.”

            Drew
reached over to touch my arm, and a jolt of electric thrill went through me. He
gently traced it from the top of my shoulder to my fingertips. “How does that
feel?”

            “I
can feel it, at least,” I said. “A few days ago, it still felt numb, but
today…”

            Drew
smiled his megawatt smile. “You feel as good as new!”

            “Why
do you say that?” I asked, looking suspiciously at him.

            “Because
I can see, no, I can tell, things have gotten much better since the first week
of school for you.”

            “How
observant,” I said. “I barely saw you since last Friday. How could you tell
just from looking at me now?”

            Drew’s
eyes darted to the side and down before facing me again. “Just because you
don’t see me, Summer, doesn’t mean I’m not around.”

            I
narrowed my eyes at him. “What do you mean by that?”

            Drew
ran his hand through his hair and muttered, “Shoot, I shouldn’t have said
that.”

            “What
are you talking about?” I asked. I turned my body to face him, giving him my
full attention. “What’s going on?”

            “Just
that, although we’re not in the same classes together except for this one, and
just because I don’t come over to the Pad to stay with you, doesn’t mean I
haven’t been looking out for you, Summer. Making sure you’re safe.”

            “You
have?” My eyes must’ve gotten as big as saucers, looking at him incredulously.
“Why?”

            “Because
I want to,” Drew said. “I want to make sure the guy who attacked you won’t be
able to again.”

            “But
why all the secret agent stuff?” I asked.

            Drew
looked very uncomfortable then. “Because Summer, I shouldn’t be with you.” He
took a deep breath, “but I try to watch after you, making sure when you leave
your classes at night throughout the week, that you make it to your car
safely.”

            “Wow,”
I said, “I didn’t know…I’m sorry if I sounded snarky earlier…it just seems like
you wanted to avoid me this entire time…”

            “I
would never want that, Summer,” Drew said, looking wistfully at my face.

            “But
why do you have to keep your distance from me, why can’t you see me, talk to me
like a real person…like Drew, not some kind of distant non-friend.”

            “Non-friend?”
Drew smiled drily at my choice of words. “I like the sound of that better than
‘friends’, Summer. It probably describes us best.”

            “And
what are we?” I asked, looking at him seriously.

            Drew
swallowed then. “We’re thicker than water, Summer.” His eyes roamed my face,
and he looked at me tenderly. “We will always be a part of each other’s lives.”

            “I
know,” I smiled into his eyes. The look he gave me then, made me want to cup
his cheek and kiss him. But I turned my head.

            Drew
cleared his throat. “So, Summer, I’m glad you’re doing well. I see you’re
happier now.

           
With
Nat.  
Is that what he wanted to hear? Was Drew fishing to see if he’d made
the right decision walking away from me so Nat can be with me?

            “Yes,
I am,” I said. “You made a very important decision for me, Drew, by walking
away, by staying away from me.” I couldn’t help myself. I haven’t seen him for
so long, and now he was right next to me, finally giving me a chance to talk to
him.

            Drew’s
eyes darted to the front of class. Dr. Standish had walked up to the podium,
dressed in his characteristically chic all black outfit. All eyes were trained
on him. “Summer,” Drew said. “I can’t discuss this with you now. I have to get
back to my seat.”

            “You
came all the way up here to ask me how my arm was doing?” I asked. “Or to see
if I was happy with Nat? What do you think, Drew?”

            Drew
had gotten up and was about to make his way back to the front of the classroom
when he turned toward me, sprang up the steps back to where I was sitting,
grabbed me from my seat, and pulled me out of the class until we were outside
in the cool morning air, standing against the wall of the auditorium building.
His blue eyes blazed into mine with such anger, desire, and frustration; I
thought he was going to punch a hole into the wall and then take me against it.

            “Dammit,
Summer,” Drew said, pushing me against the wall with his hard body. “Don’t push
it.”

            “I
don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said, looking into his eyes with pure
innocence. “I wasn’t part of the conversation you had with Nat about me.”

            “I
didn’t want to hurt you, disappoint you, Summer,” Drew said. “Last summer when
my mom was going through her divorce, and Dad was fooling around, everything
seemed so bleak in our family. Then you were there, with your sweet beauty and
sassy independence, your heart of gold, and innocence; you made everything
better. You made me want to be a better man.” Drew’s eyes searched my face, and
my breath caught in my throat. “I wanted to be your hero, Summer. I wanted to
see you look at me with that utter lost love that you always reserved for Nat.”

            “Drew…”
I reached out my hand to touch his cheek. “You are my hero,” I said. “If it
wasn’t for you showing up at the theater right then, I don’t know if I would be
here talking with you…”

            Drew
stepped close to me, encasing me against the wall and his body, a muscular arm
holding me in place on both sides of me. He didn’t touch me, but I can feel his
skin heat up near mine. He didn’t say anything, either, but from the way his
eyes ate me up, anything he was thinking of saying would come out sounding too
seductive for both of our ears. Drew had already made it clear he wanted me
only in his friend zone. But the way both of us were staring at each other, it
was going to be a struggle.

Finally
Drew reached out a finger that went up to my face and gently tucked in a strand
of hair that fell forward.

            “We’re
missing class,” I said.

            “We
can make it up,” Drew said, unable to break our stare.

            “Drew,”
I began, “I’m sorry for ever hurting you.”

            The
words were out before I could take it back.

Then
the switch. It took me completely by surprise. Drew’s eyes went from adoration
to indifference immediately as though he was another person, another
personality.

            “You
didn’t, Summer,” he said blandly. “You couldn’t hurt my feelings, especially
when I didn’t have strong ones to begin with, for you.” He dropped his arms
down, and stepped back, away from me.

            I
felt like someone had pulled the rug from underneath me.

Didn’t
have strong ones to begin with?

Did
I imagine all the times Drew said he loved me?

“Well,
if that’s the case,” I said. “I’m glad I know now how you really feel about me,
Drew.  It makes me feel a lot less guilty being with Nat, knowing you didn’t really
care for me as I thought.”

Drew
barely blinked as he coolly observed me. “You should go back to Nat,” he said.
“What we had…it was just a childhood crush. A stupid fantasy crush. Now that
I’m grown up and in college, I realized that’s all it was. I’m over it now and
moving on. Dad was right. Why settle for one girl when you can have your pick
in college.”

“Drew…”
I swallowed my tears. I wasn’t going to let him see how much his words had hurt
me. I should’ve known Drew wasn’t sincere about how he felt about me this
entire time. He was a player. He was unbelievably gorgeous. He knew the effect
he had on women. He enjoyed sex way too much to wait it out for a girl like
me., an innocent. He played me so well, got me to go to bed with him, take me
as a conquest, and I never saw it coming… “Who are you?” I asked bitterly.

I
raised my hand high in the air and let it fly as hard as it could across Drew’s
face. You could hear the smack clear across campus.

Drew
nearly stumbled to the ground with the force of my slap. My volleyball arm
could be a lethal weapon if I wanted to. I wanted to, briefly, but held back.
Despite being as hurt and betrayed as I felt, deep down inside, I still saw the
sweet beautiful boy, who tagged along with Rachel and me at Aunt Sookie’s. I
saw the young man, whose world was torn when his mother tried to commit suicide
on fourth of July. Dammit, I still saw the Drew I had fallen half in love with.

I
couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t believe this was happening. I rushed past Drew and
ran to my seat to pick up my bag.

Trish
took a good look at me, and handed me a piece of paper with her number on it.
“You can borrow my notes. Call me.”

“Thanks,”
I said, rushing out of the classroom before I could spot Drew coming in. I
hurried to my car and fumbled to open the door. When I got in and locked all
the doors, I felt the tremors go through me like tidal waves of sorrow. I kept
crying, letting it all out.

All
this time I feared I would break Drew’s heart one day if Nat ever returned my
love and we ended up together, but it was the opposite. Drew was the one who
broke my heart, shattering the rock I thought he was for me. A betrayal like
this hurt more than anything the haters and trolls tried to say or do against
Aunt Sookie and me. It cut to the core, and I wasn’t sure if I could ever forgive
Drew.

Chapter
9

N
at arrived at the Pad earlier than usual. He
was dressed up in a tie and suit as he walked through the door, which I had
eagerly opened. Although he had a key of his own, having grown up at the Pad, I
opened the door for him, I couldn’t wait to see him.

As
soon as he entered, I jumped him, wrapping my legs around his waist, as he
crashed into me, up against the walls in the hallway, frantically kissing each
other.

When
my legs touched ground, I unbuttoned his suit jacket, took it off, and
unbuttoned every button of his linen white shirt. He still wore a tie, which I
loosen but left hanging around his neck. With the last button of his shirt
undone, I took it off, and placed it on a chair, along with the suit jacket.