Pearl (3 page)

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Authors: Simon Armitage

BOOK: Pearl
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20

In her priceless pearls that precious girl

arrived at the river on the opposite reach.

No man was gladder from here to Greece

than I was, to watch her at the water's edge.

She was nearer to my heart than an aunt or niece

and my love for her fierce and limitless.

Then that special being spoke to me:

she inclined low with a ladylike curtsy,

removed the exquisite crown from her head

and with grace and courtesy greeted me.

What a blessing to be born just to speak with that girl,

dressed and adorned in priceless pearls.

21

‘O
h pearl, in those priceless pearls,’ I said,

 
‘are you really my pearl, whose passing I mourn,

  and grieve for alone through lonely nights?

  Endless sorrow I have suffered and endured

  since you slipped from my grasp to the grassy earth;

  I am hollow with loss and harrowed by pain,

  yet here you stand, lightened of all strife,

  at peace in the land of Paradise.

  What fate has led my pearl forward

  and positioned me here to feel such pain?

  Entwined once, now torn from our twinship

  I live without joy like a jeweller without jewel.’

22

 Then that jewelled one in her noble gems

 looked up and gazed with those grey-blue eyes,

 put on her crown of oriental pearls

 and spoke without sentiment, saying to me:

‘Sir, there's no truth in what you say.

 You lament that your pearl is lost for ever

 when the exquisite coffer encasing her

 is this wonderful garden and glorious estate,

 and here is her home for eternity

 where misery and melancholy never come near.

 What worth this casket would truly hold,

 if measured and judged by a master jeweller.

23

‘But gentle jeweller, if you are dejected

 at the loss of a gem which lent you such joy,

 then your mind pursues a mad purpose

 and troubles itself with a trifling cause.

 What rendered you bereft was only a rose

 that flowered and faded as nature intended.

 But now, through the nature of the chest where it lies,

 its worth as a precious pearl is proven.

 And you falsely infer your fate is a thief,

 when He conjures you something from nothing, quite clearly.

 Since you heap blame on the healing balm

 I judge you to be no natural jeweller.'

24

 That visitor was a jewel to me then, a vision

 whose noble words were no less gemmed.

‘Oh best and blessed one,' I said to her,

‘you dispel my grief and great distress,

 so I ask you please to pardon me

 for believing my pearl was oblivion's prize.

 Now that I've found it again I'll rejoice,

 and dwell with that beauty in the bright dells,

 and love my Lord and all His laws

 who has brought blissfulness back to me.

 To join you beyond this wide water

 would make this man a joyful jeweller.'

25

‘Jeweller,' that glittering gem then said,

‘why must men joke? You must all be mad.

 Three utterances you issued all at once,

 each as null and empty as the next.

 What meaning they have must escape the man

 whose mouth moves ahead of his mind.

 Firstly, you feel you have found me in this valley

 having seen the evidence with your own eyes.

 Secondly, you state you will stay right here,

 and live your life alongside me in this land.

 Thirdly, you think you will bridge this brook –

 no gentle jeweller could make such a journey.

26

‘I
judge unworthy of praise the jeweller

 
who only believes what his eyes behold,

  and call him discourteous and worthy of blame

  for believing our Lord would speak a lie,

  who faithfully promised to lift up your life

  should Fortune cause your flesh to rot.

  You set the words of our Saviour askew

  by clinging to the saying that seeing is believing,

  an expression of a person’s love of pride.

  It is unbecoming in a courteous man

  to try and to test but to trust no truth

  beyond those facts which flatter his judgement.

27

‘Now judge for yourself if you have spoken

 in the manner a man should address the Almighty.

 You say out loud you will live in this land –

 I think you must plead for permission first,

 and such a favour could well be refused.

 And you wish to pass over this watercourse,

 but first you must plot a different path:

 your cold corpse must sink through the soil;

 it was forfeited by our ancestor, Adam,

 who misguarded it in the Garden of Eden.

 Every man must experience cruel demise

 before God in his judgement will grant the crossing.'

28

‘Sweet one,' I pleaded, ‘that judgement you pass

 is a life sentence of sorrow and loss.

 Now I have gained what I thought was gone

 must I lose it again before my life's end?

 Why must I find then forfeit my prize?

 My priceless pearl, you inflict such pain.

 What use is treasure if it leads to tears,

 when its absence causes the heart to ache?

 I'm indifferent now to how far I might fall

 or the distance and depth to which I'm driven.

 Deprived of my precious pearl I expect

 a dark journey till my judgement day.'

29

‘You judge your lot as dejection and hurt,'

 said the gracious girl. ‘Why is that so?

 Through his lament for lesser losses

 man often misses the greater gain.

 Better to sign yourself with the cross

 and thank your God through thick and thin,

 because anger profits you not one penny.

 If man must suffer he should sidestep stubbornness,

 and instead of dancing like a cornered deer,

 wriggling and writhing and bleating his woes

 without exit or escape either this way or that,

 he should heed the judgement of God in heaven.

30

‘Call Him unjust till the end of the Earth,

 but He will not swerve by a single step.

 No crumb of comfort will come your way

 if you wallow and wail in the well of pity,

 so quieten your quibbling, quit your carping

 and swiftly and honestly seek His sympathy.

 Hope that your prayers will pierce His heart,

 so that mercy might do what mercy does best.

 The comfort He offers can ease your anguish,

 scatter your fears, put sorrow to flight,

 so bury your feelings or flail in fury,

 the Almighty alone is judge and jury.'

31

W
ith judicious words I said to my jewel:

‘Let there be no offence to my Lord

if I rage and rave with spluttering speech.

But my heart is heavy and talk rushes headlong

like water from a spring, surging and spewing.

I fall on His mercy, this moment and for ever.

Never reproach me with wounding words

despite my errors, my gilded angel,

but kindly offer your consolations.

Be caring and thoughtful and recall this:

you who paired me with painful despair

were the bedrock on which my bliss was built.

32

‘My bliss and my grief – you have been both –

 but my grief has been the greater by far.

 Since you were exiled from earthly care

 I could not guess where my pearl had gone,

 but seeing it again my sorrow subsides.

 Once in harmony, we were torn in half;

 may God forbid we be broken again,

 we so seldom meet by tree or stone!

 Though your conversation with me is courteous

 I lack all manners and am little more than dust.

 Let the mercy of Christ and Mary and John

 be the base on which I build my bliss.

33

‘You stand before me in a blissful state,

 and myself a demoralised, mournful man.

 You appear to notice nothing of this,

 though I suffer greatly from searing sadness.

 But since you appear in my presence here

 I ask you to say, without argument,

 and to answer my question with hand on heart,

 what life you lead through dawn and dusk.

 My spirit soars, knowing your position

 is one of worth and high honour,

 for this is the ground and this the gate

 by which the road to my blissfulness runs.'

34

‘May bliss find and follow you, sir,'

 said that figure of lovely limb and face.

‘You are welcome to walk and wait in this place,

 for now your speech is pleasing to hear.

 Arrogant attitude and haughty pride,

 I have to tell you, are detested here.

 My Lord has no liking of life's complainers

 and only the humble find a home in His house.

 When you come to rest at last in His realm

 be deeply devout and meek in demeanour.

 My Lord the Lamb, who loves such a manner,

 is the rock on which my blissfulness rests.

35

‘You say I lead a blissful life

 and wonder at such an exalted existence.

 As you know full well, when your pearl fell

 I was young in years and innocent at heart.

 But my Lord the Lamb by divine love

 brought me to marriage and made me His bride,

 crowned me His queen to bloom in blessedness

 today and tomorrow, till eternity.

 His honour and heritage I have inherited;

 I am wholly His and His alone.

 His grace, His nobility and family line

 are the root and branch of all my bliss.'

36

‘M
y bliss,’ I said, ‘can your tale be true?

 
Don’t take offence if I speak out of turn

  by questioning if you are heaven’s queen,

  worshipped by everyone the world over.

  We believe in Mary, mother of all grace,

  who bore a child while pure and chaste.

  No one could vie for the Virgin’s crown

  unless they surpassed her in some noble aspect.

  Rare and unrivalled, unique in her sweetness,

  she has come to be called the Phoenix of Arabia,

  a peerless creature that flew from her Creator,

  as did the queen of courtesy.’

37

‘Courteous Queen,' said that lovely creature,

 kneeling on the floor, raising her face,

‘Matchless mother and fairest maiden,

 fount from which grace and goodness flows.'

 Then from her prayers she stood and paused

 and in that place she spoke these words:

‘Sir, many seek grace and are granted it here,

 but in this domain there are no usurpers.

 All heaven belongs to that holy empress,

 and earth and hell are within her dominion.

 No one will oust her from her high office

 for she is the queen of courtesy.

38

‘The company of the court of God's kingdom

 live by a custom unique to this country.

 Everyone who arrives and enters here

 is called the queen or king of the realm,

 and no one person shall deprive another,

 but derive pleasure from a neighbour's possessions

 and wish their crowns were five-fold in worth

 if such an improvement were possible.

 But my lady, mother of Jesus our Lord,

 she is highest of all throughout this empire,

 and none of our company is sorry that is so,

 for she is the queen of courtesy.

39

‘And through such courtesy, as Saint Paul preaches,

 we are all joined with Jesus Christ;

 as head and arm and leg and navel

 are firmly fastened to each person's frame,

 so every single Christian soul

 belongs to the Master of spiritual mysteries.

 Could hate or similar sentiments exist

 between one being's body parts?

 Does your head experience anger or envy

 if your wrist or finger flaunts a ring?

 And like those limbs we live and love

 among heaven's courteous queens and kings.'

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