Paycheck (2003) (10 page)

‘I’m going. I’ve always wanted to know what things were like before the war. You see the history spools, but it isn’t the same. I want to
be
there. Walk around. You know, they say there was no ash before the war. The surface was fertile. You could walk for miles without seeing ruins. This I would like to see.’

‘I didn’t know you were interested in the past.’

‘Oh, yes. My family preserved some illustrated books showing how it was. No wonder USIC wants to get hold of Schonerman’s papers. If reconstruction could begin—’

‘That’s what we all want.’

‘And maybe we’ll get it. I’ll see you later.’

Ryan watched the plump little businessman depart, his briefcase clutched tightly. The row of League Guards stepped aside for him to pass, filling in behind him as he disappeared through the doorway.

Ryan returned his attention to the ship. So Kastner was to be his companion. USIC - United Synthetic Industries Combine - had held out for equal representation on the trip. One man from the League, one from USIC. USIC had been the source of supply, both commercial and financial, for Project Clock. Without its help the Project would never have got out of the paper stage. Ryan sat down at the bench and sent the blueprints racing through the scanner. They had worked a long time. There was not much left to be done. Only a few finishing touches here and there.

The vidscreen clicked. Ryan halted the scanner and swung to catch the call.

‘Ryan.’

The League monitor appeared on the screen. The call was coming through League cables. ‘Emergency call.’

Ryan froze. ‘Put it through.’

The monitor faded. After a moment an old face appeared, florid and lined. ‘Ryan—’

‘What’s happened?’

‘You had better come home. As soon as you can.’

‘What is it?’

‘Jon.’

Ryan forced himself to be calm. ‘Another attack?’ His voice was thick.

‘Yes.’

‘Like the others?’

‘Exactly like the others.’

Ryan’s hand jerked to the cut-off switch. ‘All right. I’ll be home at once. Don’t let anyone in. Try to keep him quiet. Don’t let him out of his room. Double the guard, if necessary.’

Ryan broke the circuit. A moment later he was on his way to the roof, toward his inter-city ship parked above him, at the roof field of the building.

His inter-city ship rushed above the unending gray ash, automatic grapples guiding it toward City Four. Ryan stared blankly out the port, only half-seeing the sight below.

He was between cities. The surface was wasted, endless heaps of slag and ash as far as the eye could see. Cities rose up like occasional toadstools, separated by miles of gray. Toadstools here and there, towers and buildings, men and women working. Gradually the surface was being reclaimed. Supplies and equipment were being brought down from the Lunar Base.

During the war human beings had left Terra and gone to the moon. Terra was devasted. Nothing but a globe of ruin and ash. Men had come back gradually, when the war was over.

Actually there had been two wars. The first was man against man. The second was man against the claws - complex robots that had been created as a war weapon. The claws had turned on their makers, designing their own new types and equipment.

Ryan’s ship began to descend. He was over City Four. Presently the ship came to rest on the roof of his massive private residence at the center of the city. Ryan leaped quickly out and crossed the roof to the lift.

A moment later he entered his quarters and made his way toward Jon’s room.

He found the old man watching Jon through the glass side of the room, his face grave. Jon’s room was partly in darkness. Jon was sitting on the edge of his bed, his hands clasped tightly together. His eyes were shut. His mouth was open a little, and from time to time his tongue came out, stiff and rigid.

‘How long has he been like that?’ Ryan said to the old man beside him.

‘About an hour.’

‘The other attacks followed the same pattern?’

‘This is more severe. Each has been more severe.’

‘No one has seen him but you?’

‘Just the two of us. I called you when I was certain. It’s almost over. He’s coming out of it.’

On the other side of the glass Jon stood up and walked away from his bed, his arms folded. His blond hair hung down raggedly in his face. His eyes were still shut. His face was pale and set. His lips twitched.

‘He was completely unconscious at first. I had left him alone for awhile. I was in another part of the building. When I came back I found him lying on the floor. He had been reading. The spools were scattered all around him. His face was blue. His breathing was irregular. There were repeated muscular spasms, as before.’

‘What did you do?’

‘I entered the room and carried him to the bed. He was rigid at first, but after a few minutes he began to relax. His body became limp. I tested his pulse. It was very slow. Breathing was coming more easily. And then it began.’

‘It?’

‘The talk.’

‘Oh.’ Ryan nodded.

‘I wish you could have been here. He talked more than ever before. On and on. Streams of it. Without pause. As if he couldn’t stop.’

‘Was - was it the same talk as before?’

‘Exactly the same as it’s always been. And his face was lit up. Glowing. As before.’

Ryan considered. ‘Is it all right for me to go into the room?’

‘Yes. It’s almost over.’

Ryan moved to the door. His fingers pressed against the code lock and the door slid back into the wall.

Jon did not notice him as he came quietly into the room. He paced back and forth, eyes shut, his arms wrapped around his body. He swayed a little, rocking from side to side. Ryan came to the center of the room and stopped.

‘Jon!’

The boy blinked. His eyes opened. He shook his head rapidly. ‘Ryan? What - what did you want?’

‘Better sit down.’

Jon nodded. ‘Yes. Thank you.’ He sat down on the bed uncertainly. His eyes were wide and blue. He pushed his hair back out of his face, smiling a little at Ryan.

‘How do you feel?’

‘I feel all right.’

Ryan sat down across from him, drawing a chair over. He crossed his legs, leaning back. For a long time he studied the boy. Neither of them spoke. ‘Grant says you had a little attack,’ Ryan said finally.

Jon nodded.

‘You’re over it now?’

‘Oh, yes. How is the time ship coming?’

‘Fine.’

‘You promised I could see it, when it’s ready.’

‘You can. When it’s completely done.’

‘When will that be?’

‘Soon. A few more days.’

‘I want to see it very much. I’ve been thinking about it. Imagine going into time. You could go back to Greece. You could go back and see Pericles and Xenophon and - and Epictetus. You could go back to Egypt and talk to Ikhnation.’ He grinned. ‘I can’t wait to see it.’

Ryan shifted. ‘Jon, do you really think you’re well enough to go outside? Maybe—’

‘Well enough? What do you mean?’

‘Your attacks. You really think you should go out? Are you strong enough?’

Jon’s face clouded. ‘They’re not attacks. Not really. I wish you wouldn’t call them attacks.’

‘Not attacks? What are they?’

Jon hesitated. ‘I - I shouldn’t tell you, Ryan. You wouldn’t understand.’

Ryan stood up. ‘All right, Jon. If you feel you can’t talk to me I’ll go back to the lab.’ He crossed the room to the door. ‘It’s a shame you can’t see the ship. I think you’d like it.’

Jon followed him plaintively. ‘Can’t I see it?’

‘Maybe if I knew more about your - your attacks I’d know whether you’re well enough to go out.’

Jon’s face flickered. Ryan watched him intently. He could see thoughts crossing Jon’s mind, written on his features. He struggled inwardly.

‘Don’t you want to tell me?’

Jon took a deep breath. ‘They’re
visions
.’

‘What?’

‘They’re visions.’ Jon’s face was alive with radiance. ‘I’ve known it a long time. Grant says they’re not, but they are. If you could see them you’d know, too. They’re not like anything else. More real than, well, than this.’ He thumped the wall. ‘More real than that.’

Ryan lit a cigarette slowly. ‘Go on.’

It all came with a rush. ‘More real than
anything
else! Like looking through a window. A window into another world. A real world. Much more real than this. It makes all this just a shadow world. Only dim shadows. Shapes. Images.’

‘Shadows of an ultimate reality?’

‘Yes! Exactly. The world behind all this.’ Jon paced back and forth, animated by excitement. ‘This, all these things. What we see here. Buildings. The sky. The cities. The endless ash. None is quite real. It’s so dim and vague! I don’t really feel it, not like the other. And it’s becoming less real, all the time. The other is growing, Ryan. Growing more and more vivid! Grant told me it’s only my imagination. But it’s not. It’s real. More real than any of these things here, these things in this room.’

‘Then why can’t we all see it?’

‘I don’t know. I wish you could. You ought to see it, Ryan. It’s beautiful. You’d like it, after you got used to it. It takes time to adjust.’

Ryan considered. ‘Tell me,’ he said at last. ‘I want to know exactly what you see. Do you always see the same thing?’

‘Yes. Always the same. But more intensely.’

‘What is it? What do you see that’s so real?’

Jon did not answer for awhile. He seemed to have withdrawn. Ryan waited, watching his son. What was going on in his mind? What was he thinking? The boy’s eyes were shut again. His hands were pressed together, the fingers white. He was off again, off in his private world.

‘Go on,’ Ryan said aloud.

So it was
visions
the boy saw. Visions of ultimate reality. Like the Middle Ages. His own son. There was a grim irony in it. Just when it seemed they had finally licked that proclivity in man, his eternal inability to face reality. His eternal dreaming. Would science never be able to realize its ideal? Would man always go on preferring illusion to reality?

His own son. Retrogression. A thousand years lost. Ghosts and gods and devils and the secret inner world. The world of ultimate reality. All the fables and fictions and metaphysics that man had used for centuries to compensate for his fear, his terror of the world. All the dreams he had made up to hide the truth, the harsh world of reality. Myths, religions, fairy tales. A better land, beyond and above. Paradise. All coming back, reappearing again, and in his own son.

‘Go on,’ Ryan said impatiently. ‘What do you see?’

‘I see fields,’ Jon said. ‘Yellow fields as bright as the sun. Fields and parks. Endless parks. Green, mixed in with the yellow. Paths, for people to walk.’

‘What else?’

‘Men and women. In robes. Walking along the paths, among the trees. The air fresh and sweet. The sky bright blue. Birds. Animals. Animals moving through the parks. Butterflies. Oceans. Lapping oceans of clear water.’

‘No cities?’

‘Not like our cities. Not the same. People living in the parks. Little wood houses here and there. Among the trees.’

‘Roads?’

‘Only paths. No ships or anything. Only walking.’

‘What else do you see?’

‘That’s all.’ Jon opened his eyes. His cheeks were flushed. His eyes sparkled and danced. ‘That’s all, Ryan. Parks and yellow fields. Men and women in robes. And so many animals. The wonderful animals.’

‘How do they live?’

‘What?’

‘How do the people live? What keeps them alive?’

‘They grow things. In the fields.’

‘Is that all? Don’t they build? Don’t they have factories?’

‘I don’t think so.’

‘An agrarian society. Primitive.’ Ryan frowned. ‘No business or commerce.’

‘They work in the fields. And discuss things.’

‘Can you
hear
them?’

‘Very faintly. Sometimes I can hear them a little, if I listen very hard. I can’t make out any words, though.’

‘What are they discussing?’

‘Things.’

‘What kind of things?’

Jon gestured vaguely. ‘Great things. The world. The universe.’

There was silence. Ryan grunted. He did not say anything. Finally he put out his cigarette. ‘Jon—’

‘Yes?’

‘You think what you see is
real
?’

Jon smiled. ‘I know it’s real.’

Ryan’s gaze was sharp. ‘What do you mean, real? In what way is this world of yours real?’

‘It exists.’

‘Where does it exist?’

‘I don’t know.’

‘Here? Does it exist here?’

‘No. It’s not here.’