Parker's Island (47 page)

“So, have you two met?”

“Yes.”

We sat down to the best breakfast I had ever had
.
Harley was a master in the kitchen.  I ate until I was stuffed full.

“Wow, that was wonderful!  You can sure cook!” I said.

“And not just in the kitchen
,
”
m
y aunt said, making me blush.

“I’m going out to the shop and get to work
,
” I said,
suddenly
feeling very
much a third wheel.

“I’ll be out…
later
,
”
s
he grinned.

I walked outside and started toward the shop when I felt a cold
,
wet nose on my hand.  I assumed it was
my aunt’s German Sheppard
,
Harry,
but
as
I turned to pet him, I
saw
Duchess.  I froze where I stood and slowly scanned the yard.  He was standing
a few feet in front of
me
, leaning
against a tree with his arms crossed over his chest.  The sight of him still took my breath away.

“Did you really think I wouldn’t find you?”
h
e asked, looking both angry and relieved.

“Not this soon
,”
I said,
tremblin
g.

“Why did you leave? 
And
I want the truth
,
”
h
e
demanded, taking a step toward me
.

“I told you why.”

“You’re lying.  You told me you’d never lie to me
,
Delaney
.”

“I’m not lying. 
Go home
,
Logan. 
Go home to your wife.”
             
“Delaney, I don’t know what this is all about, but whatever it is
,
we can work it out.”

“No
,
we can’t.  How did you find me?”

“I have my ways
,
”
h
e grinned
, leaning back against the tree and crossing one leg in front of the other
.

“Who told you where I was?”
 
K
nowing someone caved
, and I
wanted
to know who
I needed
to yell at
.

“Everyone.”

“What do you mean?”

“I asked your mom, but she
tried to keep her promise to you and
wouldn’t tell me
…
at first.  Then I decided to
go to
Molly, but
her mother said
she was at Brian’s house.  So, I went there and
they both
told me where you were.  Then on the drive over, your Mom called and told me where you were.
  A while later I got a call from
your
Dad.
”

“
My Dad?” I asked, shocked.  “
I told them all not to…
”

“
He
gave me directions.”

“Wow!
  My dad, really?” I said,
completely surprised
that my father would tell Logan where I was, far less give him directions.
             
“Why is it that everyone knows we belong together, except you?”

My aunt and Harley walked out of the house then, “
Delaney, w
ho’s your friend?”
m
y aunt asked.

“
Hello,
I’m Logan Barnett
,
”
h
e said, reaching out his hand.

“Logan
.  H
mm,
I should’ve recognized the shirt
,
”
m
y aunt grinned.

“Excuse me?”
h
e asked, confused.

“How could you possibly leave
…
him?  Wow!”
s
he whispered in my ear.

“Logan was just leaving
,
” I said.

“Not without you.”

“That’s not an option.  I told you, go home to your wife.”

“Wife?”
m
y aunt
asked
, shocked.

“Delaney, what happened?  Please tell me why you’re doing this
.
”
h
e
asked
, taking a step toward me.

I stepped back and said, “Go home!  Please!”
I put up my hands as if to hold him back and
will
ed
myself not to cry.

Harley took my
plea
as a sign that I was afraid of Logan and he stepped in front of me.  “I think the lady asked you to leave.”

“He’s not going to hurt her
,
Harley
.
H
e loves her
,
”
m
y aunt said, pulling Harley back
by his arm
.

“Delaney, please don’t do this.  Please come home.”

“I
am home. 
Just go!”

“I told you, I’m not leaving without you.  You love me, I know you do.”

I took a deep breath and spat,
“You really think you’re that charming and irresistible?  I don’t want to hurt you Logan
, but I’m not in love with you…
not anymore
,
” I lied, cringing inside as I forced each word from my lips.

He stood there watching me, waiting for me to falter or show some sign, any sign that I didn’t mean what I said.  I stared him down,
willing
him to believe it.

I knew what I was doing to him
.  H
e’d had years of rejection from his father, he lost his mother and now I was killing him.  But I knew I had to do it.  I knew we could never be happy together if he lost the only links he had to his mother.  It would
eventually
drive us apart
,
anyway
.

He walked to his car, took one more look at me and opened his door. 
             
“Duchess
,
go home
,
” I
ordered
, reminding him that he had to take her with him.

“She’s yours
.  S
he’s not the same without you.  She doesn’t want me anymore
,
either
,
”
h
e
got into his car and
drove off then, out of my life.  The pain
I saw in his eyes
put me over the edge and I passed out.  I woke up sometime later in the hospital, crying for Logan.

“Honey, I don’t understand.  Why would you send him
away when you so desperately love him?” 

I told my aunt everything, right down to that horrible visit with Logan’s dad.  I made her swear that she would never say anything to anyone. 

“I think you’re underestimating him.  I don’t think he cares about anything but you.”

“I know
.  H
e’d give it all up
;
lose everything for me and then what?  How could I live with that?  It would end up killing us anyway.  Maybe in two years when he’s free, he might forgive me.”

“You are one stubborn child!”
m
y aunt said,
obviously
irritated
with me
.

“I’m not a child.”

“You’re acting like one.  Do you have any idea how many people search their whole lives looking for that special person?
  A
nd you’re throwing it away.”

“I have to let him go.  This isn’t fair to him.  He’ll lose everything, and for what?
For m
e and a baby that’s not his
?”

Thankfully,
Dr. Grey came in to the room
then
and
saved me from further arguments with my aunt.  She
said I was fine to go home.  I made an appointment to see her at her office the next day for a prenatal visit.

“Can we just go home now?” I
asked
.

“Fine.” 

Harley pulled the car around and helped me in
.  He was
eyeing m
e
warily, as if I was going to pass out again at any moment.  “I’m fine.  I’m sorry I scared you both.”

The next f
ew weeks passed
by
very slowly.  I did what I was supposed to, ate when I was supposed to,
and
went to the doctor when I was supposed to
,
but I was
just going through the motions.  I worked, ate and
occasionally
slept, nothing more. 
My nightmare had returned in full force
.  I
t
was relentless and I didn’t have Logan to make it go away.
I was exhausted, but I couldn’t stop.

My mother called on a daily basis
,
begging me to come home.
 

“I can’t
,
Mom.  I have responsibilities here.  I’m working.  I need the money, and Aunt Vickie needs the help.  Aunt Vickie said I can stay, even after the baby.  I’m sorry to hurt you, but I have to have this clean start.”

“Can I come when you have the baby?”
s
he asked,
sounding
hurt.  I seemed to always hurt the ones I loved.

“You better.  Your granddaughter and I need you.”

“I love you
,
hone
y.  Have you heard from…
him?” s
he asked, warily
, knowing I was still angry at everyone for telling him where I was
.

“No.
  I have to go
now
,
M
om.”

I was
sitting in my doctors
’
office for my prenatal appointment
.  U
p to that moment,
the reality that I was fast approaching delivery hadn’t hit home.
I obviously knew I was pregnant and that I had to prepare for the baby, but it wasn’t until my doctor informed me that I would be seeing her weekly from then on, did the realization hit me.  I was having a baby, and as wonderful and caring as my aunt and mother
both
were, I
felt completely
alone. 
I wanted the one man I couldn’t have and
that thought was torturing me…
every second.

Dr. Grey asked me to lie back and put my feet into the stirrups and I started to panic.  “No.  I don’t want to.  I don’t want to do this.”

“It’s only going to take a minute
,
Delaney
.
I promise I’ll be gentle.”

“No, I mean
I don’t want to have a baby.  Not alone.”

“I’ll be there, I promise
,
”
s
he said, misunderstanding my sudden fear.

“But he won’t!  I need him.”

“Who?”

“Logan, I need him.  I can’t do this alone
,
”
I
cried for the first time since he drove away. 
I hadn’t let myself cry for fear that I would give in. 
I was sobbing uncontrollably
now
, which concerned my doctor to the point of calling my aunt into the room
. 

“I don’t know, she just keeps crying and calling for a Logan
,
”
m
y doctor said, sounding concerned.

“She’s a stubborn girl.  Thank you, I’ll take it from here.  When do you want to see her again?”

“Well, I didn’t get to examine her, so give it a few days and then have her come see me.  Please call me if this continues or
she needs
anything.  There’s obviously something wrong
, but
I’m certain it’s not
physical
.”

“
S
he’s heartbroken.”