Parents and Children (37 page)

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Authors: Ivy Compton-Burnett

BOOK: Parents and Children
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‘I didn't tear the paper,' said Gavin.

‘We know you did not, my boy,' said Eleanor.

‘Gavin took great care,' said Nevill.

‘I feel grateful to Gavin,' said Daniel. ‘He has ended the necessity of feeling pity for Ridley.'

‘I don't know, Daniel,' said Luce. ‘Is our pity any less? Of course we have other feelings.'

‘Which picture do you like best?' said Fulbert, to Nevill.

‘He will have that one Mr Ridley had.'

‘Father has it in his pocket,' said Gavin.

‘Perhaps he has a pencil too,' said Nevill.

‘I will find you one tomorrow,' said Fulbert.

‘Grandpa spoke in a loud voice,' said Nevill, ‘loud and angry. Mr Ridley did too.'

Sir Jesse sank into a chair at the sound of his name, as if it gave him some sort of release, and sat with his head and shoulders bent, with a suggestion that he was a broken man.

‘Who will live in the new house?' said Gavin. ‘Now that Mother is not going to marry Mr Ridley.'

‘Mother will marry hum,' said Nevill, ‘and have a nice house and not this one.'

‘Other people will live in it,' said Honor.

‘Not other people,' said Nevill.' Mr Ridley wouldn't let them.'

‘Perhaps he will live in it alone.'

‘No, not alone. He would be very angry.'

‘Which do you like best, Mr Ridley or Father?' said Gavin suddenly to Eleanor, seeking to remedy his own situation by bringing forward hers.

‘Father is my husband,' said Eleanor, without hesitation, ‘and we have always loved each other, and we always shall. But Ridley was good to me when I thought Father could not return, and I shall always be grateful to him. Some day you will understand.'

‘I understand now,' said Honor. ‘He kept it a secret about Father's coming back, so that he could marry you before people knew. He yielded to temptation.'

‘Now I think you may run away,' said Eleanor, stroking her hair.

‘What did Mr Ridley do?' said Gavin, in a low tone to his sister.

‘I will tell you when we are upstairs.'

‘Now you may run away,' said Eleanor again. ‘You will always feel kindly to him.'

‘I haven't said I shall,' said Gavin.

‘I have no antipathy to him,' said Honor.

‘Now I said you could run away,' said Eleanor. ‘You may kiss Father before you go.'

‘He will kiss Mother too,' said Nevill, coming up to her. ‘And Mr Ridley come back soon, and never go away again.'

‘Now I said you could run away.'

‘Do you think you were right, dear?' said Hope.

‘Tell Hatton and Mullet that I will come up later and see them,' said Fulbert, as he parted from his children.

‘He will tell them,' said Nevill, and ran before the others from the room.

‘I think I ought to go home, Mother,' said Faith. ‘I have a feeling that someone should be with Ridley.'

‘I am glad you take the noble course, dear. It improves our family average. And it seems to need it.'

Faith went with a grave face towards the door. Sir Jesse rose
and without looking at anyone did the same, as if he found it easier to follow a lead. Regan got up a minute later, and putting her knitting easily together, smiled on the company and followed. Paul came from the back of the room, as if released from some bondage.

‘Well, I am going to take my wife away,' said Fulbert. ‘I have a leaning towards my own armchair. It is many months since I have sat in it. And if I leave her, other people form designs upon her. I have been happy in having my friends to welcome me. And I wish you joy of your gossip; it should be a good one.'

‘It should be wonderful,' said Hope, coming quickly to the centre of the group. ‘And as we all have a relation disgraced, it will not be spoiled by personal embarrassment. I have not dared to dwell on our own family dishonour.'

‘Perhaps we never shall,' said Paul. ‘Then we shall be saved a great deal. Poor boy! Poor boy!'

‘The exposure of two people upon one occasion must be very rare,' said Daniel.

‘We so seldom get any exposure at all,' said Paul.

‘It is better for it all to happen together,' said Graham. ‘Better for the exposed people, I mean.'

‘They are saved from that sense of loneliness,' said Hope. ‘Men's lives are evidently what they are supposed to be. And some have the misfortune to be found out. It is all true.'

‘People should keep their darker times to themselves,' said Daniel.

‘They are certainly not well advised to be photographed at one of them,' said Paul.

‘Would it be better not to talk about it?' said Faith.

‘Nothing could be so bad,' said Hope. ‘And it is because you think so that you have not gone to Ridley.'

‘I thought we should all be going soon, Mother.'

‘No doubt he has taken the late train to London,' said Paul.

Faith turned grave eyes on her father, in reference to his silence on this matter.

‘I wonder if he has anyone to welcome him there,' said Hope.

‘Grandpa was rather mature when he sowed his wild oats,' said Daniel.

‘They don't seem so very wild,' said Graham. ‘People must be fairly established, when they are in a position to support two families.'

‘Poor Grandpa!' said Luce. ‘I daresay he was very lonely out there. Not that I want to make excuses for him.'

‘There is none for the various foolishness he has shown,' said Paul. ‘It comes of a life without criticism.'

‘How did he manage about leaving the woman, when he returned to England?' said Graham.

‘It is no good to find out about it, Graham,' said Daniel. ‘You will never go as far as your grandfather.'

‘He told her the truth about his life,' said Paul. ‘And he lived with her again, when he went out a second time. She died when Susan was born.'

‘And I pitied you for having to sit by him!' said Hope. ‘To think of the freemasonry among men!'

‘I suppose she was not equal to him,' said Faith.

‘I daresay not, to our ideas,' said her father. ‘Social and other differences would count less out there.'

‘And when he heard of her death, he sent for the three children,' said Faith. ‘I am glad he did not shirk his responsibilities.'

‘Are they to know who their father is?' said Graham.

‘No, it is to be always kept from them,' said Paul. ‘He feels it is better for them and for him. I am quoting his words.'

‘He must be afraid of its leaking out, now it is not his own secret,' said Graham.

‘It is to be the secret of us all.'

‘Well, that is the least aggravating kind of secret,' said Hope.

‘Poor Grandma!' said Luce, in a soft tone.

‘Yes, poor Lady Sullivan!' said Faith. ‘She is the really tragic figure. I think she showed a great heroism, the greater that it was quiet.'

‘I think heroism is only mentioned when it is that,' said Hope.

‘She has known for years,' said Paul. ‘She saw Sir Jesse's interest in the young people, and saw a likeness to him, and guessed the truth.'

‘To think she has carried the burden for all this time!' said Faith, slowly shaking her head.

It is Grandpa's affair,' said Daniel, ‘or it should have been.'

‘Did she tell you, Paul?' said Hope.

‘She said a word to him.'

‘Did he mind?' said Graham.

‘Well, I think he had a shock.'

‘He can hardly expect not to suffer at all,' said Faith.

‘It seems like Grandpa to sin for years and suffer for a moment,' said Graham, as though he were glad if this were the case.

‘It is good that there is no longer that between them,' said Faith. ‘And I daresay Lady Sullivan knows men.'

‘I did not know you did, dear,' said Hope.

‘All women must in a way, Mother.'

‘Well, I don't see how, in some cases, dear.'

‘There would not be definite ways, Mother.'

‘Oh, well, perhaps we think the same. Now can we dwell on Sir Jesse's lapse, and hardly mention Ridley's?'

‘That is what we will do, if you please,' said Paul. ‘But I should not have thought the boy would be so bold.'

‘I have been feeling an unwilling respect for him,' said Hope. ‘And as in me respect is generally that, perhaps the rest of you feel a proper one.'

‘I cannot do that,' said Faith, in a quiet tone. ‘But of course I have other feelings.'

‘I can't help thinking of Grandma's tragedy,' said Luce. ‘It has not come today, but there must have been a day when it did come.'

‘There must,' said Faith.

‘When the expedition involved what it did, no wonder Grandpa thought us too young for it,' said Daniel.

‘Did Father find any traces of what had happened?' said Graham.

‘He did not say,' said Paul.

‘Perhaps Grandpa had prepared him.'

‘Does the freemasonary extend to father and son?' said Hope.

‘I suppose a long period away from home does mean all kinds of things for a man,' said Faith.

‘Ridley has done well enough in his own village,' said Paul. ‘I
hope he will not go further outside. For he will now remain away.'

‘Yes, I suppose he will, Father,' said Faith.

‘Is there any likeness in the Marlowes to Grandpa?' said Luce. ‘And is their real name Marlowe?'

‘Yes, it was their mother's name,' said Paul.

‘Of course, illegitimate children are called by their mother's name,' said Faith. ‘I have always seen likenesses in them, but I have never been able to place them.'

‘I have always thought the resemblance was to each other,' said Graham, ‘and I think it chiefly is.'

‘The likeness to your grandfather would not strike people when no one looked for it,' said Paul. ‘If the relationship had been known, there would have been no need to fancy it.'

‘The Marlowes are our uncle and aunts by half blood,' said Luce, in her musing tone.

‘You had better forget it,' said Paul. ‘If things are in our minds, they come to our lips.'

‘This thing does seem to,' said Hope.

‘Now how are we to face Grandpa?' said Luce.

‘Yes, that is how it will be,' said Daniel, ‘when surely it should be the other way round.'

‘Poor Grandpa!' said Luce.

‘I do admire you all,' said Hope. ‘You have none of the severity of youth. I should hardly have expected Faith to be so tolerant; I might not even have approved of it. I think people must be better with each generation.'

‘I can hardly be accused of youth, Mother,' said Faith.

‘And poor Grandma!' said Luce, as if she could not in honesty give up this idea.

‘Yes, it is Sir Jesse's career of deceit that is hard to forgive,' said Faith. ‘That long course of deception of his wife. It goes against the grain.'

‘But you do forgive it, dear,' said Hope.

‘He meant to die with that between them, Mother.'

‘It is there now,' said Graham. ‘That is what he did not mean. He was just keeping his own counsel. He has never meant to die at all.'

‘He will never get over my being Ridley's father,' said Paul. ‘It may be a release for me in a way.'

‘And how about his own varied fatherhood?' said Daniel.

‘I have already recovered from it. I am not the man he is.'

‘Yes, I do forgive it,' said Faith, in a quick, low tone that rose as she continued. ‘Poor Eleanor Sullivan is in a sad position.'

‘It is greatly improved,' said Daniel. ‘She prefers Father to Ridley.'

‘Well, in a position of peculiar difficulty.'

‘The worst is already past.'

‘It was a hard homecoming for your father.'

‘It was a sound instinct that led him to prepare us,' said Luce, smiling.

‘He was fortunate, considering he failed to do so,' said Graham. ‘He did not find his very name forgotten, or anything like that. And he seemed to be a little surprised.'

‘Why do we joke about it?' said Luce.

‘I have not done so,' said Faith, rising from her chair. ‘Now it is not a day for lingering.'

‘My heart fails before the prospect of our first family gathering,' said Graham. ‘To think that Grandpa and Grandma and Mother must all be there!'

‘And this on the day when Father is restored to us!' said Luce. ‘This is the thing I do not incline to forgive Grandpa.'

‘It must be difficult for you,' said Faith, as if there were no question of the actual forgiveness.

‘It is fortunate that Father's heart is stout enough for it all,' said Daniel.

Chapter Twelve

‘Father has come home!' said Honor, bounding into the schoolroom. ‘He was ill and unconscious, but he was never dead. Mother can't marry Mr Ridley, and things will be like they used to be.'

‘I am so thankful for you, dear,' said Miss Pilbeam, stooping
to kiss her. ‘I heard last night and I rejoiced from my heart.'

Honor drew back with a look of consternation, and Gavin who was behind her, came to a sudden pause.

‘We should have had a holiday, if Mother had thought of it,' resumed Honor, in an almost more than ordinary tone. ‘But she said, as you would have the trouble of coming, we were to have lessons.'

‘I think you would please your father by doing your very best.'

‘I don't think he minds,' said Honor, turning round on one foot.

‘Don't you wish your mother could come back?' said Gavin, with a simple air of superiority.

‘I do indeed,' said Miss Pilbeam.

‘I don't suppose she ever can, because she died in the house, didn't she?'

‘No, I know she cannot.'

‘But I daresay you don't mind her being dead as much as you did at first,' said Gavin, revealing his own experience of the effect of time.

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