Paraworld Zero (27 page)

    Since Simon had never been to a dance before, he didn’t know exactly what to
expect, but after a few seconds of listening to the queer music, he was pretty sure the Pudo
dances were far different from the ones back on Earth. For one thing, a robotic orchestra
performed the strange music. Each computerized machine played its instrument superbly and in sync
with the others; however, the techno rhythm of the music sounded so mechanical that it was devoid
of emotion.

    “Hello, everyone!” Thorn announced loudly. “I’m here… You can start the dance
now.”

    Tonya scowled, embarrassed to be in his presence. “Thornapple,” she said,
“have you looked at yourself in the mirror lately? You’re not exactly God’s gift to women.”

    “That may be so,” he retorted, “but nobody here believes in God
anyway.”

    “It’s only an expression. It means that not everyone’s life revolves around
you.”

    “Well, Butblacruze, I think—”

    “Don’t call me Butblacruze!”

    “Look, I can’t help it!” he shot back. “If there’s ever a time to call you
Butblacruze
, it’s right now. So, Butblacruze, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go have
some fun.” He walked away without even letting Tonya respond.

    She turned to Simon, who was stifling a laugh, and growled, “What are you
smiling at?”

    
If you only knew
. He straightened his face and replied, “Nothing. Nothing at all.”

    “Well, I didn’t get all dressed up for nothing. Aren’t you gonna ask me
to—”

    “Dance?” A young man in a turtleneck sweater interrupted her.

    “What?”

    “Would you like to dance?”

    Caught off guard, she paused for a moment and then answered reluctantly, “I
guess so.”

    “Have fun,” Simon said with a jovial smile. “I think I’ll sit this one
out.”

    “Just remember, Simon,” Tonya said as she left, “you can’t stay on the
sidelines forever.”

    The white tiles under her feet illuminated as she pranced over them. Simon
searched for Thorn and found him standing alone at the punch bowl.

    Simon smiled. “I see you’ve discovered the best part of this dance.”

    “It’s a little watered down for my tastes,” Thorn said.

    Simon picked up a glass of the pink liquid and took a sip. The sour taste,
similar to concentrated lemon juice, made his lips pucker and his eyes water.

    “Hah! Hah! I was just joking. It’s pretty potent stuff, isn’t it?”

    Simon’s eyes were still hurting, but he managed to nod his head in
agreement.

    Thorn took a big gulp and said, “I can’t believe this dance is taking
place.”

    “Why’s that?”

    “Many officials didn’t think it was appropriate. Dancing has little
scientific value, but some of the city council thought we could benefit from the music.”

    “The music?”

    “Yeah, music can be very complicated. First off, when you compose a song you
have to make sure it follows all the normal rules of musical theory—like key changes, rhythm, and
tempo. Then you have to find the correct instruments that will compliment each other. It’s like
forming one big equation. Finally, you have to program the robots to play in sync with each
other, and I hear that’s no easy task.”

    The orchestra finished playing and then started up another song with an
entirely different tune from the one before. Tonya tried to walk back to her friends but was
interrupted by three little Puds who wanted to dance with her.

    “Looks like Konya is popular tonight,” Thorn said. He leaned casually against
the table.

    Simon stole a furtive glance at her. “She doesn’t socialize much at school. I
guess there’s a lot of people who’ve been wanting to get to know her.”

    “Yeah, and she is pretty hot!”

    Simon raised an eyebrow but didn’t respond.

    The night dragged on while the two boys guarded the punch bowl and chatted
about girls. Simon felt that if he took one more drink, he’d shrivel up and die from the tartness
of the punch.

    “So who would you like to dance with?” asked Thorn.

    Simon remained silent. He fixed his eyes upon Tonya and her latest dancing
partner: Alvin Bottlebrush.
What is she doing with him
?

    “Simon… Simon?”

    “Huh? Sorry, what was that?”

    “I said, who do you want to dance with?”

    “I don’t know… Nobody, I guess. I wish Tonya hadn’t talked me into
coming.”

    “Come on, Simon. You just need some pointers on women. See that girl over
there?” He pointed to an attractive girl across the dance floor. “That’s Gwin. She’s the
prettiest girl in school. Now, I’ve had my eye on her the whole night. I’ve been studying her
patterns and the way she reacts when someone asks her to dance. She only says yes when she’s
alone or when all of her friends have someone to dance with. Women are very loyal. They don’t
want to abandon their friends.”

    Thorn kept talking about how observant he was and how he knew exactly how to
win Gwin’s heart. Simon faded in and out of the conversation; he was too busy staring at Tonya
and Alvin.

    “…So if we could just find enough boys to ask her friends to dance…”

    Simon flinched when he saw Tonya laugh at something Alvin had said. Her hair
radiated a vibrant blue color, and she seemed especially happy to be with this young, handsome
man—a man whom, just last night, she had labeled an
animal
.

    The song ended, and Tonya attempted to make her way to Simon and Thorn once
more.

    “…So you see, Simon, if you just sit back and be more observant of things,
you’ll notice that there might be a girl out there who wants to dance with you.”

    “Okay, Thorn. Here’s a question for you,” Simon said. “What do you do when
the girl you want to dance with is walking towards you?”

    “What?”

    Simon pointed to Gwin, who was headed straight for them. Upon seeing the
beautiful girl, Thorn became so excited, he almost spilled his punch.

    “All right, Simon, let me show you how it’s done.”

    At that moment, Tonya finally made it to where Simon and Thorn were standing,
having had to decline several dance proposals on the way. With a big smile, she said in jest, “My
goodness! How much punch are you boys gonna drink?”

    “It’s actually pretty good,” Simon lied. He took another sip and fought back
the urge to spit it back up.

    “Well, you’re gonna have to get on the dance floor eventually…”

    Thorn remained oblivious to Tonya’s words. Beaming from head to toe, he
opened his mouth to speak to Gwin as she approached, but the pretty girl walked right past him to
get to Simon.

    “Would you like to dance with me?” she asked with a cute smile and a
wink.

    Simon glared at Tonya and said curtly, “Please excuse me.”

    He promptly turned around and walked off with Gwin, leaving his friends
behind.

    “Who’s that?” Tonya asked. A troubled look appeared on her face.

    “That’s the prettiest girl in school… She was supposed to dance with
me.
”

    Thorn hung his head in dejection.

    “All right, Thorny. I can’t see you like this. Come on. Let’s dance.”

    On the dance floor, Simon asked, “Now, you’re Gwin, right?”

    “
Yes!
” she responded excitedly, as if he had just asked her to marry him.

    “My name is—”

    “Simon Kent,” she finished his sentence with even more excitement. “Everyone
knows who you are. You’re the alien from Earth.”

    “Well, I never thought of myself as an alien.”

    “Sorry.” She blushed. “I didn’t mean it in a bad way. Everyone here is so
serious. I think it’s great to have some new people in the city.”

    Simon studied the lights on the floor and frowned. “Well, Gwin, I have to
admit something to you. I’m not the best dancer.”

    “That’s okay. This is the first dance I’ve ever been to. I didn’t really
catch everything myself when they were teaching us how to dance yesterday.”

    “Who was teaching you how to dance?”

    “Weren’t you at school yesterday? We all had a special class on how to
dance.”

    “Oh, I must have missed it. Can you help me out? I’m not sure what to do with
all these lights on the floor.”

    She instructed, “When the outline of a tile lights up, we step on it. You’re
supposed to step on the tiles that turn red, and I’m supposed to step on the ones that turn
blue.”

    It seemed simple enough, so Simon took her hand, and they started to dance.
When he stepped on the first red tile, a faint but pleasant sound came from the floor, and the
tile lit up completely. Gwin stepped on a blue tile, and it too lit up and began to hum
slightly—but in a different octave than what Simon’s tile had given.

    “Looks like you’ve got it,” she said with a smile that would have rivaled
even one of Thorn’s famous grins.

    In her enthusiasm, she stepped backwards onto an inactive tile. The tile
glowed yellow and then gave off an awful sound—like a note played off key.

    “Why did it do that?” asked Simon.

    “I messed up, so we have to start all over.”

    “What do you mean,
start all over?
Isn’t this just a dance?”

    “Well, sort of. We’re supposed to form patterns and shapes with our dance
steps.”

    “You’re kidding me.”

    “No, I’m not.”

    “That’s ridiculous.”

    “I agree. It’s pretty dumb that we can’t just enjoy ourselves. Oh, it’s your
turn, by the way.”

    “Sorry.”

    Simon stepped on his tile, and then Gwin stepped on hers. After a few more
tiles, Simon realized the strange dance wasn’t as bad as he thought it would be. It was actually
similar to a video game in which the player had to use his or her reflexes to step on the correct
spot. The only problem with the peculiar dance was that they were concentrating so hard on
stepping on the correct tiles, that it became difficult to talk.

    “So tell me about your planet…” Gwin said, panting lightly. “I hear it’s much
different than our world.”

    They finished making a double helix up the dance floor. A chime sounded a
congratulation, the red and blue lights disappeared, and they embarked on a new shape. Simon
looked up to see Tonya staring at them from a distance, but she quickly turned her head.

    “Well… everyone is taller…” He nearly missed his tile. “Not everyone is… so
concerned with science… We have people who do sports… people who do musicals and plays… we have
people who raise animals and people who race cars for a living… We do have scientists… and
mathematicians… and biologists… and a lot of the same jobs that you have here… but it’s
different.”

    “How so?” She leaped to her tile and hit it square on.

    “For one thing, most people on my world believe in some sort of supreme
being… We even take a day off from work and school so we can spend time with our families and
worship God if we want to…”

    As they danced, the humming of the tiles harmonized with the robotic
orchestra. In a sense, the floor functioned as an instrument, which allowed the dancers to
participate with the orchestra in completing the melody of the song.

    “We like to listen to music and play games…” Simon continued. “We don’t live
our lives so we can work… we work so we can live our lives… in a more meaningful way… We have
families—”

    “We have families, too,” Gwin said defensively. She stepped on a blue tile
three times in succession.

    “Yeah, but our families have fun together… Not everything has to have a
scientific purpose to it…” Simon and Gwin were really dancing fast now. They had already
completed a rhombus and a figure eight. “Sometimes, we go to the park to feed the birds… or we
watch a movie just for the sake of entertainment.”

    “That’s amazing!”

    They glided up the dance floor, hitting every other tile as they went.

    “We don’t even go to school every day like you do… Sometimes we’ll take a
whole week off or even the whole summer… just so we can have a break from school.”

    “Wow! Now, that is different.”

    Gwin took her eyes off the floor for the first time and looked up at Simon.
Consequently, she stepped on the wrong tile again. The partially formed geometric shape on the
floor disappeared.

    “Oops, sorry!”

    “That’s all right.”

    Loud clapping suddenly came from every direction. Simon glanced around and
discovered that nobody was dancing; they had all been watching Gwin and him successfully make the
shapes on the floor. Evidently, the two must have been dancing faster than he had realized;
furthermore, he and Gwin were probably the only couple who could keep up with the beat of the
music.

    “I suppose we’re a hit,” Gwin said, squeezing his arm and laughing.

    Tonya dragged Thornapple across the dance floor. She pulled on Simon’s other
arm and asked, “May I cut in?”

    Simon hesitated, so Tonya shoved Thornapple forward with a sigh and said to
Gwin in an exaggerated tone, “Look, this guy won’t stop talking about you.” Thorn blushed. “It’s
driving me crazy! If you don’t dance with this boy, I’m gonna have to kill him. And then the
whole thing will get really messy. I mean, do you know how hard it is to get blood off a satin
dress?” Tonya grabbed Gwin’s shoulder. “Please,” she said, her voice dripping with melodrama,
“don’t make me kill him. Save his life. Dance with this poor boy.”