Authors: Ruth Ryan Langan
Tags: #Romance, #Historical Romance, #New York Times Bestselling Author
“You...?” He felt the heavy, painful band that had been wrapped around his heart for all these long weeks begin to slip a notch. “You have no feelings for my brother?”
“None.”
Without realizing what he was doing, he grasped her hand. “But most women...” He caught himself and said on a sigh, “I should have known. You’re not like other women.” He looked down at their joined hands. “Flem has always been able to lie convincingly. And since he’s always had a way with women, I just...” His words died abruptly and he took a step back. “You have every right to hate me.”
“I don’t hate you, Gray.”
He couldn’t look at her. “I have to go out to the barn now.”
As he turned away Fiona lay a hand on his back, and she could feel the warmth of his flesh through the shirt. “Now that you know the truth about Flem, why are you running away?”
He kept his back to her, wondering how much longer he could bear being this close. “Because I don’t deserve your forgiveness. I was so jealous when I thought you and Flem—” He clamped his mouth shut, too moved to even speak.
“You were jealous?” She felt the first spark of hope flare in her heart. “That’s such a strong emotion.”
“All my feelings for you are too strong. And if I don’t get out of here right now, I’m afraid of what I might do.”
The spark was now a quick, bright light in her heart. “What would you do, Gray?”
He kept his back to her, ashamed to face her. “I wouldn’t be able to keep from holding you. Kissing you.”
Fiona felt her heart soar. How long had she waited for those words? Her voice was soft, breathy. “What if I told you I wouldn’t mind?”
He turned. On his face was a look so fierce, her joy turned to wariness. “I’m not a saint. It wouldn’t stop there. If I kissed you, held you, I’d want more.”
Though her heart was pounding, she lifted her chin in that way he’d come to recognize. “What if that’s what I want, too, Gray?”
Her words were nearly his undoing. Without thinking he touched a hand to her cheek. Just a touch, but she moved against him like a kitten. He lowered his face to hers, aching for the touch of her mouth.
Just in time he came to his senses and caught her roughly by the upper arms, holding her a little away. “I have nothing to lose. But you must think about your reputation. You’re a teacher. When the people of this town learn that you spent the night alone with me, there will be talk.” He released her and lowered his hands to his sides before turning away. “Think of that while I cool off in the barn.”
He picked up his boots. When he straightened, she stepped in front of the door. “Let them talk, Gray. I only know I want you to stay here with me.”
“Do you know what you’re saying?”
She met his look. “I do. Yes.”
He might have smiled at the thickness of her brogue, if it hadn’t been for the way his heart was pounding in his chest. Like a runaway team heading straight toward a high, sheer cliff. If he didn’t find a way to stop it now, they would both take a fall that might destroy them.
He shook his head. “I’m big and clumsy. And you’re...” He stared into her eyes. “You’re sweet and untouched. I could never be gentle enough for you.”
“I’m not asking you to be gentle, Gray.” She touched a hand to his face. Just a touch, but she saw his eyes narrow on her with such intensity, it had her breath backing up in her throat. “But if you don’t soon kiss me, I think my poor heart might just stop beating.”
He managed a grin that was both appealing and dangerous. “We can’t have that now, can we?”
He leaned close, intending to merely brush his mouth over hers. But the moment their lips met, everything changed.
His boots dropped from his hands and fell to the floor with a thud, though he wasn’t even aware. His arms came around her in a fierce embrace as he dragged her close and covered her mouth with his.
He’d known she would taste this clean and sweet.
Dear God, how sweet.
Like a cool, clear stream on a hot summer day. Had known, too, that there would be this fresh innocence. He’d even tried to anticipate the heat he knew would be generated by her touch. What he hadn’t expected was the need. This hard, driving need that had him changing the angle of the kiss and taking it deeper, as he drank her in like a drowning man.
Without realizing what he was doing he drove her back against the door and covered her mouth in a kiss that spoke of all the hunger, all the longing that he’d stored up for so long.
She returned his kisses with a hunger of her own.
Against her mouth he whispered, “I knew.” His big hands moved up her arms, creating sparks that had her sighing.
“Knew what?”
“One kiss would never be enough.” He pressed himself against the length of her until she could feel the thundering of his heartbeat inside her own chest. “I have to have more.”
He nibbled her lips until, on a sigh, they opened for him. His tongue explored hers, then withdrew, inviting her to do the same. Though she was hesitant at first, she grew bolder, following his example.
His kisses were soft one minute, rough the next. His hands, too, moved over her with exquisite tenderness, before gripping her painfully as if pulling himself back from the brink of something dark and dangerous.
He held her a little away, his eyes hot and fierce. “You need to stop and think what it is we’re about to do here.”
With a sigh she wound her arms around his neck. “I don’t want to think, Gray. I want to feel.”
“So do I. You don’t know how much.” Calling on all his willpower he removed her arms from around his neck and stepped back, breaking contact. “But one of us has to be sensible. Papa taught me that love, real love, means caring more about the other than about your own needs.”
“Love?” Her eyes, her voice, took on a new softness. “Do you love me, Gray?”
He wanted so badly to gather her into his arms and tell her just how much he loved her. Instead, he kept his hands at his sides, knowing if he dared to touch her again, he’d never be able to stop. “How could I not? You’re the finest woman I’ve ever known.”
She caught his arm. “Then love me, Gray. Hold me. Kiss me. Show me how much you love me. Here and now.”
He closed his fingers around her wrist. Even that small touch had sparks leaping between them. “Think about this. Just being here with me will ruin your good name in our town.”
“I can’t deny that I love being a teacher. I don’t want anything to spoil that. But I love you more, Gray.”
“It isn’t love.” He was already shaking his head in denial. “You’re just grateful because I saved you.”
Stung, she stiffened her spine. “You don’t think I know the difference between gratitude and love?”
“I think...” He needed to end this, and escape to the barn, before they did something she would deeply regret in the morning. “I think you’re confused.”
He yanked his coat from a peg by the door, then bent to retrieve his boots. When he straightened, she was smiling. A little cat smile that seemed full of secrets.
“Maybe I was confused, Gray, but I’m not now.”
He shrugged into his coat. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“You’re a good man. And I love that you’re looking out for me. But you said that we might be here for days.” While she spoke the blanket began to slip a notch, baring one shoulder. A look came into his eyes that was more feral than human. Seeing it, she felt a quick rush of fear, before forcing herself to say what was in her heart. “I don’t believe either of us is strong enough to resist for that long.”
With a muttered oath he reached a hand to the edge of the blanket, hoping to cover the expanse of flesh. Too late he realized his mistake. The moment his fingers came in contact with her skin, he could feel the blood roaring in his temples.
Instead of drawing away she stepped closer, until their bodies were brushing. With a finger she traced the outline of his lips. “Do you realize that in all the time I’ve known you, I’ve never once heard you speak my name?”
He couldn’t seem to drag enough air into his lungs. There was a pressure on his chest threatening to crush him.
In defense he framed her face with his big hands and stared down into her eyes with a look that would frighten most men. “Fiona. There. I’ve said it. Are you happy?”
She merely smiled. “Again.”
“Fiona.” Without realizing it, his tone softened, as did his touch. “Fiona. Fiona.” He whispered her name like a caress. His fingers curved around to tangle in the softness of her hair, and he buried his lips at her temple. “How I’ve wanted to say it out loud. It’s like music. Fiona. I love the sound of your name.”
She sighed, feeling a welling of love that threatened to swamp her. “And I love hearing you say it.”
He brushed his mouth over hers, nibbling the corner of her lips until she opened for him. Inside her mouth he whispered, “You realize we’ve already gone too far.”
“I do. Yes. I’m frightened, Gray, but I won’t go back.”
“I’m glad of that, because I can’t. I’d rather die.” He pressed his forehead to hers on a sigh. “God help me, Fiona. I’m scared to death. But I can no more resist loving you than I can refuse to breathe.”
“M
y sweet, sweet Fiona.” Gray ran a hand lightly down her back, gathering his forces for the storm he could feel building inside him. “Do you know how long I’ve wanted you?”
“How long?” She lay a hand on his cheek.
“Since first I saw you. Do you remember?”
“I do, yes.” The memory had her smiling.
“I felt as if all the breath had been knocked out of me. I couldn’t breathe. I stood there staring at you, and couldn’t think of a single thing to say. I thought I was in the presence of an angel.”
“And I thought you were the strongest man I’d ever seen. You carried my trunk as if it weighed nothing at all.”
“I wasn’t even aware of it. Only you.” He drew her close and ran his hands down the length of her. “You’re so slim. So small.” He framed her face and stared down into her eyes with a look that had her heart tripping over itself. “I’m so afraid I’ll hurt you.”
“Shh.” She pressed a finger to his lips and absorbed a rush of heat when he closed his hand over hers, drawing her finger into his mouth. She had never before experienced anything so intimate. “You could never hurt me, Gray.”
“I’ll try not to.” He ran nibbling kisses over her upturned face, brushing his mouth over her forehead, the corner of her eye, the tip of her nose. “My beautiful, wonderful Fiona. Now that I’m free to say your name, I can’t seem to stop.”
They were both laughing when he teased her lips until they opened for him. On a sigh he took the kiss deeper.
She thought she couldn’t bear it when his mouth left hers. But when his tongue slowly traced the curve of her ear, she trembled from the pure pleasure of it. He nipped at the lobe, before darting his tongue inside, causing her to gasp and clutch at his waist.
“You taste...” He ran hot, wet kisses along the smooth column of her throat. “So very sweet.”
She was chuckling as she arched her neck to give him easier access, but moments later, when he dipped his mouth lower, her laughter turned to a moan of pleasure mixed with surprise as little fingers of fire and ice trickled down her spine. And when his mouth closed over her breast, the sensations that ripped through her had her gripping his waist, afraid that at any moment her trembling legs might fail her.
The blanket slipped away to pool at their feet. He stepped back, his gaze burning over her.
She had always thought she would be embarrassed to have a man see her like this, but there was no shame in her. Instead, the look in his eyes made her feel beautiful. Desirable. It was a heady feeling, and one that had her smiling as he drew her close and gathered her into his arms.
“You’re even more beautiful than I dreamed.” He brushed her lips with his before trailing kisses across her jaw to the curve of her neck. “And I’ve had more than my share of dreams since you came into my world.”
“Would you care to share them?” .
He chuckled against her throat, sending a flare of heat straight to her heart. “I may. Some day. Right now, this is better than any dream.” He savaged her mouth with kisses until she sighed and moved in his arms, growing weak with pleasure. She wondered that she could still stand.
As if reading her mind, he took her hand and lowered her to the blanket at their feet.
She laughed. “How did you know my legs were about to fail me?”
“Because my own are none too steady.” He leaned up on one elbow and traced a finger down the length of her, from shoulder to hip, following that with light feathery kisses along her throat to her collar bone. “Your skin is so pale, it looks like spun glass.”
“And yours.” She reached her hands under the shirt he’d never managed to button, sliding it from his shoulders before timidly touching a palm to the dark hair that curled on his chest. “You’ve such a beautiful body, Gray.”
That had him laughing. “You have a strange sense of beautiful.”
“But you are.” Growing bolder she trailed a hand down the flat planes of his stomach and saw his eyes narrow, heard his quick intake of breath before he covered her mouth with his.
The press of his body on hers brought new pleasure. They seemed to fit together perfectly, like the pieces of a puzzle, her soft curves molding to his sculpted muscles.
She sat up, trailing a hand across his shoulder and down his arm, feeling the rope of sinew and muscle just beneath the firm flesh. “I’ve never known anyone as strong as you.”
“Remind me to thank my father for giving me all those farm chores at an early age.” He wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close, while his mouth moved over hers.
His kisses were no longer gentle, but possessive, and the arm that encircled her could have easily crushed her. As if remembering his strength, he softened his kiss and his touch.
Outside the wind battered and howled, causing the walls to shudder from the assault. Inside, the farmhouse was quiet, except for the hiss and snap of the fire in the kitchen stove.
Gray studied the woman who lay in his arms. Her hair, black as midnight, spilled in wild tangles around the face of an angel. But it was her eyes that held him. Blue as a summer sky, fixed on him with a look of such trust, they pulled him in to her very soul.