Paradise (13 page)

‘Stay,’ Cal repeated, and she found herself saying yes.

They sat in the beach-side café. All of them had a healthy appetite after the swimming. Cal and Honey shared a rotissière chicken with French fries while Angel had Caesar salad with shrimp. Angel had always thought that her daughter was thankfully too young to realise that her parents had split up but Honey seemed especially happy today, as if she couldn’t quite believe her luck in having both her parents at her beck and call. Maybe Angel was reading too much into it, she didn’t know, all she knew was that she was in no hurry to leave and break up the happy scene.

‘I can see why you love it out here,’ Cal said, looking out over the expanse of white sand, the brilliant blue ocean just beyond with several white yachts cutting
jaunty trails through the water. ‘I mean, I love Brighton and couldn’t really imagine living anywhere else, but the sea’s never this blue, is it?’

‘And there’s no sand, and the sun doesn’t always shine. And the chips aren’t this good.’ She sneaked a French fry from Cal’s plate. ‘I do get homesick, though,’ she added quietly.

‘I’m sure everyone misses you.’

And what about you? Angel burned to ask. Talking about Brighton made her wonder what was going on in Cal’s life back home. She knew little about it other than that he saw Tony and Gemma regularly, and worked hard. Was he seeing anyone yet? It would hardly be surprising if he was. Cal Bailey was a very eligible man. He must have women throwing themselves at him . . . women like Simone Fraser. Angel just had to ask, ‘So how’s Simone getting on?’

‘She’s okay. She moved down to Brighton about a month ago and is helping her sister run a fashion boutique in the Lanes.’

Instantly Angel felt a stab of jealousy. Now Simone was in Cal’s home city, she was bound to see him. ‘I hope she’s learnt how to be nice to people then or I can’t imagine they’ll get many customers,’ she said bitchily. ‘So, do you see much of her then?’

Cal shrugged. ‘Every now and then. And I suppose she calls me a quite a lot,’ he admitted. ‘She hasn’t got that many friends. She was never really that good at making them, if you remember.’

That’s because she’s a complete cow! Angel thought, and then felt another stab of jealousy. Didn’t Simone have another ex-boyfriend she could ring up? Did it have to be Cal? Angel hated herself for caring so much but she couldn’t help it. She avoided looking at Cal and took a long sip of her mineral water, hoping he hadn’t noticed how unsettled she’d become.

‘And I think she realises what a bitch she was to you,’ he went on. ‘She’s always asking after you.’

‘Probably hoping that she’ll hear some bad news,’ Angel muttered sulkily.

A sigh from Cal: ‘I don’t think so, but let’s not talk about her. I know it winds you up. So, this afternoon I was going to take Honey to the beach and maybe go to the pier. D’you want to come with us? I’m sure she would love it if you did.’ He paused. ‘And I would like it as well.’

Angel hesitated. She really should be getting back, and she knew that Ethan would be angry about her spending time with Cal, but she couldn’t say no. She wanted to spend more time with Cal and Honey. All her good intentions of playing it cool had deserted her.

And so she spent the rest of the afternoon with them going on the white clapboard Santa Monica pier with its long boardwalk – too long for Honey, who demanded a piggy back from Cal. Angel had always been a thrill-seeker and loved fairs and theme parks, so she went on the Ferris wheel and roller-coaster and screamed her head off in delighted terror, while Cal and Honey waved to her from below. They all went on the dodgems – Cal and Honey going in one car, Angel in another – and raced each other, much to Honey’s amusement.

‘This definitely beats Brighton Pier,’ Cal told her as they sat down having coffee.

‘How can you say that?’ Angel said in mock outrage. ‘I had my first snog on Brighton Pier, in the ghost train with Tommy Jackson.’

‘Was it a good one?’ Cal asked, smiling, though Angel was pretty sure he knew the answer.

‘It was atrocious; he bit my tongue and then gave me a massive love bite on my neck. You can just imagine what my dad said about that, can’t you? Proper read me
the Riot Act and threatened to ground me for a month, until Mum reminded me what
he
was like as a teenager.’

‘Yeah, I can imagine it. I remember when . . .’ Cal paused, then shook his head and frowned. ‘No, probably best not to go there.’ Angel looked at him, wondering what he was going to say, and suddenly the moment seemed charged with emotion. So many memories, so many regrets. Cal gazed back at her and she felt as if he could read her thoughts.

‘One of those!’ Honey exclaimed, shattering the moment as she pointed to a little boy carrying an enormous stick of pink candy floss, almost bigger than his head.

‘No way, Honey!’ Cal told his daughter. ‘Or you will have the sugar rush to end all sugar rushes.’

Honey’s bottom lip trembled, and Cal, fearing toddler meltdown, quickly added, ‘Let’s go on to the beach and make sand castles. I bet I can build a bigger one than Mummy. Come on!’ And he picked up his daughter and began walking briskly back along the boardwalk.

Santa Monica beach stretched out into the distance, miles of glorious white sand, fringed with palm trees. It was the perfect setting and one of Angel’s favourite places. She often came here with Honey; she would bring her bike, put Honey in the child seat and cycle along the ocean-front path, looking at the swimmers and surfers, watching the rollerbladers weave their way along the path. Now she sat cross-legged on a rug and watched Cal and Honey hard at work, digging in the sand. The pair of them looked so happy together. The sun was warm on Angel’s skin and a slight breeze from the sea lifted her hair. She suddenly wished this moment could last forever, wanted to shut out all the complications in her life.

‘Shall I take a picture?’ she asked Cal.

‘Yeah, thanks,’ he replied, brushing the sand off his hands before retrieving his phone from his jacket and handing it to Angel. But instead of pressing the button to activate the camera she somehow accessed Cal’s pictures and found herself staring at the image of a beautiful dark-haired woman with stunning blue eyes. She was wearing a revealing evening dress and a seductive smile.

‘Who’s this?’ Angel demanded, holding the phone up so Cal could see the image.

He frowned. ‘Just a friend of mine.’

Angel immediately had a burning desire to look through the other pictures on Cal’s phone, to see if there were any more pictures of this ‘friend’ or any others. She suddenly felt such a fool for allowing herself to be caught up in the moment.

‘What’s her name?’ She couldn’t stop herself from asking the question.

Cal shrugged. ‘Madeleine.’

‘And what does Madeleine do?’

‘She’s a model. I met her at some charity event.’

And why have you got her picture? Angel was dying to ask, but didn’t.

She quickly took the photograph and handed back the camera. She was about to make a move when Cal asked a teenage girl who was passing by with her friends to take a picture of all three of them together. He put his arm round Angel, with Honey sitting between them. It could have been a scene from their past.

‘Thanks,’ Cal said to the girl as she returned the phone.

‘You’re welcome.’ She beamed back at him, showing off perfect teeth. ‘You guys looked so cute together. What an awesome family!’

Cal showed Angel the picture – she herself might not use the word ‘cute’ to describe it, but they certainly looked good together. Angel felt she was wandering on to dangerous territory; knew she could not let Cal have this much power over her emotions again.

‘I have go now,’ she said abruptly. It was 5 p.m. She should have been back over four hours ago. She stood up, brushing sand from her skirt. There was a pause when she almost wondered if Cal was going to ask her to stay longer. And if she hadn’t seen that picture, she knew that she would have been tempted. But instead he said, ‘We’ll walk back to the hotel with you.’

She hated saying goodbye to Honey but tried not to show it, realising that it must be only a fraction of the pain Cal experienced when he said goodbye to his daughter knowing that he wouldn’t see her for weeks. ‘I’ll send you the picture,’ Cal told her as they stood in the lobby.

Angel thought she didn’t need a picture to remind her of what she had lost, but she simply nodded.

‘I had a great time,’ Cal said. ‘Maybe we could do it again this week.’

‘Maybe,’ Angel replied, but all she could think about was that she had to keep him at a distance again. Seeing the picture of Madeleine had proved that.

‘My car’s here, I have to go.’ And blowing Honey a kiss, she swiftly walked out of the hotel, pausing at the doorway to turn and wave goodbye to her daughter.

‘Where the fuck have you been?’ Ethan shouted at her the moment Angel stepped into the hallway. He was tense with anger, his eyes narrowed. ‘You should have been here hours ago. And why didn’t you have your phone switched on?’

Angel had never seen him this furious before.

‘Sorry. I did text Mimi to say I would be late. Honey
didn’t want me to go so I ended up spending a few hours at the hotel, that’s all. I didn’t think it was such a big deal.’

Angel made to go upstairs, she didn’t want to argue, but Ethan grabbed her arm. ‘And why is your hair all messed up? You look like you spent the afternoon in bed. Is that where you were . . . fucking him?’

Angel shook her arm away. ‘Don’t be stupid! I was on the beach; it was windy. End of.’

‘No, it’s not! You’ve messed everyone around today. It was so selfish of you, Angel. We’re behind in filming now, but all you could think about was him, wasn’t it?

‘Fuck off! I was thinking about my daughter. It was nice spending time together as a family. I miss that, if you must know.’ She didn’t care if that comment hurt him. She was so angry at the way Ethan was having a go. But he wasn’t going to let up.

‘I wonder if you ever think about me at all? What am I . . . a convenient fuck buddy you use to get over your husband? Or do you want to get back with him? Is that it? You think he’s so fucking perfect, but he’s not. He cheated on you, Angel, and let me tell you – that kind of guy doesn’t change! He would do it again and again. I would never cheat on you.
Never
.’

‘Oh, just leave it, can’t you?’ she exclaimed, and ran up the stairs before Ethan could say anything else. She didn’t need this. The day had been emotional enough without Ethan piling on the pressure with a fucking forklift truck. She stomped into the shower. She hadn’t been in the wrong, had she? Ethan was over-reacting as usual about Cal, wasn’t he? But as she let the hot water cascade over her, she began to reflect on the day and realised that Ethan had a point; she had been selfish. She should have come back sooner, or at least phoned. Cal had asked her to stay and she’d done what she’d always done: dropped everything for him.

She’d been so caught up with thinking about how Cal made her feel that she had relegated Ethan to second place when he deserved more. She tried to imagine how she would have felt if he had gone off with his ex-wife and switched off his phone – would she have felt that was a reasonable thing to do? She knew she would not. Ethan had every right to be angry and jealous. And yet again, why was she jeopardising what she had with him when, for all she knew, Cal was seeing Madeleine, and possibly even Simone? God, she was so stupid! She dried off quickly, and dashed into her dressing room. She slipped on a black silk tee-shirt dress, leaving her underwear off. She had some more making up to do.

‘Sometimes I feel you fuck me when you don’t want to think,’ Ethan said afterwards, ‘You’re very good at using sex as a distraction.’ They were lying stretched out on the vast double bed, hot, sweaty and very satisfied, after what had turned out to be a marathon sex session.

‘No way,’ Angel protested, languidly pushing back the hair from her face. ‘I wanted to have sex with you because I wanted to have sex, there wasn’t any hidden agenda. I don’t have anything I need to be distracted from.’

Ethan turned and looked at her. ‘I’m not sure if I believe you . . . but I’m not sure it even matters if the sex is as smokin’ as that!’ And he kissed her on the lips, sealing the deal.

Angel lay back. She didn’t want to analyse his comment about her using sex as a distraction. Everything would be okay, she and Ethan were back on track, she could handle Cal. But later, when Ethan was in the shower, she checked her phone and there was a message from Cal along with the picture of the three of
them.
Thanks
for
a
great
day
,
Angel
,
hope
we
can
do
it
again
.
Cx
. It was the warmest message he had sent her in a long time and instead of feeling that she had a handle on the Cal situation, she went to sleep feeling as conflicted over it as she ever had been.

It didn’t help when, the following day, Cal texted her at breakfast to say that Honey was desperate for her favourite toy elephant which Angel had forgotten to pack, and could he drop round and get it? Of course, this would be the one day when Ethan didn’t have training until the afternoon. One of her worst nightmares was about to be realised, with the two men coming face to face again. In fact, Ethan insisted on answering the door to Cal, in what Angel was pretty sure was some kind of macho, this is my house, my woman act.

‘Hey,’ Ethan said, without any of his usual charm.

‘Hi,’ was Cal’s response. No warmth there either.

‘I’ve got the elephant,’ Angel put in, coming forward and giving Honey a hug. She could sense the two men sizing each other up. This was beyond awkward! The last time they had met had been when Angel had left Cal for Ethan.

‘Okay, thanks,’ Cal replied. ‘She’s been really upset without it. Well, we’ll leave you to your day. We’re going to the beach.’

Honey stretched out her hand. ‘Mummy come?’

‘You go with Daddy, Mummy’s going to work. Love you, Honey.’