Paper Faces (15 page)

Dot didn't know what an asylum was. She thought it was a kind of prison. So had he done something wrong?

“Nervous collapse, they called it. He was a mental, couldn't even speak a threepenny bit.”

Dot thought of Loopy Lil. She was a mental. She was also a safe and kind person to be with. If her father got like that, then it might be all right.

“Loopy Lil's different,” said Gloria. “She were born that way. Your old man started out okay. When he got called up, he was good as the best of them. First time I see him in his uniform, he looked that lovely I could've eaten him alive. It was thinking too much, about the fighting, what did for him, got him all confused. It was a kind of illness, in the head.”

Dot remembered what it was like when she had felt so ill and confused.

“He didn't like none of it, so he sort of copped out, gave up eating one fine day, till he couldn't stand up no more, couldn't do what he was told on the airfield. Last war, men who did what he done, they called them deserters. Used to take them out and shoot them in the head. That cured their problems darn quick.”

“I'm glad they don't do that no more,” Dot said. She wondered, did Gloria still love him?

“What kind of funny question is that?”

“Was it like when I was ill and couldn't eat? Maybe he needs to get a breath of fresh air. Maybe you should take him down to Mrs. Hollidaye's. Get some roses in his cheeks. I got better, didn't I?”

“Can't do that, ducks. He's been discharged. He ought to start looking for work now.”

He wasn't really sleeping. He heard them whispering by the door. He rolled over and opened his eyes, though he didn't look at Dot any more than she looked at him. He looked over at Gloria.

“It's her what should go away and stay,” he said. “It's not right her having to be cooped up in here with me. She don't like me. She's scared.”

“Am not!” Dot wanted to explain it was more that she just didn't know him yet, and she was sorry about him being ill.

“That woman who's been good to you, would she have her if you asked?”

Gloria nodded.

He took a ten-shilling note from his trouser pocket and gave it to Gloria.

“She'd be all right on the train?”

“Oh, yes,” said Gloria. “She's a sensible kid, aren't you, ducky? And she likes it down there.”

He took four pennies from his other pocket.

“She know how to use the phone?” he asked.

“Course I do,” Dot said.

“She got the lady's number?”

“Yes.”

Gloria said, “All right then, love. You do as your dad says. Hop on over to the end of the road and give her a tinkle. Ask if you can come down for a day or two. I can tell school you been took poorly again.”

Dot walked down the road slowly to give herself time to think what to say. She wanted so much to go to Mrs. Hollidaye's, for a long time. Yet she sensed that it might be like telling things the way you wanted them to be rather than the way they really were. It would be like running away from him back at the basement. Dot decided she wouldn't invite herself to stay but would wait till Mrs. Hollidaye asked her.

She dialed the number carefully and heard the distant ringing tone. She could imagine it clanging across the hall, up the stairway, along the drafty corridors, around the drawing room, and out through the open windows. She wanted to go and yet didn't want to go both at once.

She heard Mrs. Hollidaye's voice answer and she pressed button A to let the pennies clatter through, and they were connected.

“Hello there, Mrs. H. It's me, Dorothy here. How's yourself, then?”

Mrs. Hollidaye sounded pleased. She asked Dot about whether the sun was shining in London, about the school, and about Gloria.

Dot said they were all A-one and tip-top.

Then Mrs. Hollidaye told Dot about Loopy Lil, about the dogs and the hens, and about her son, whose ship was due home from the Pacific any day now.

Dot kept expecting Mrs. Hollidaye to ask her to come down and stay. Why didn't she?

Dot said, “We didn't get the flat we was after. So Gloria's put in for one of them new prefabs.”

Mrs. Hollidaye said she had read about them. “Prefabricated temporary emergency housing. How perfectly champion.”

“If we get one, we'll have two bedrooms, so I'll have me own window to look out of. I've always wanted me own window. But they don't build them,” Dot explained. “The walls come on this lorry, already made, in pieces with the windows stuck in. Ours ain't arrived yet.”

Still Mrs. Hollidaye didn't mention Dot going to stay. So Dot said, “And Derek's back, too.”

“Your father? Why, this is excellent news too, my dear.”

“But he don't look too hot. It's because he's been ill-like, in the head.”

“Another casualty of the conflict. But he'll win through.”

“I feel like he's the child, and I've got to be the adult.”

“I know you and your mother will be doing your very best for him. A loving family is the best medicine till he's on his feet again.”

“I'm going to buy him some flower seeds,” said Dot. “For him to plant. See, when we get the prefab, we get this little titchy bit of space round the edge, so I was thinking of us having a garden.”

“Why, that really is simply splendid news, my dear. Nasturtiums would be good if you want something quick. Or sweet peas. They don't take up much space. You must let me know as soon as you know when you're moving, won't you? And we've quite a few bits and bobs of furnishing that your mother might find useful. And of course, I'll send you up some cuttings. How exciting. I do like to hear about a new garden in the planning. Hostas do well, in sun or shade, spring bulbs of course, maybe a few montbretia? Any soil, and they multiply so easily. Gardening's a wonderful medicine, too.”

Dot started to say “I hope I can bring my dad down to visit you someday.” But the money ran out, so she was cut off in mid-sentence. She wasn't sure if Mrs. Hollidaye had heard. She hoped she hadn't heard any of it. Like the dancing man said, she had to get back to her mum and dad. They had to stick together and be a family.

Dot unrolled her piece of twine and began to skip slowly along the pavement over the coal-hole covers toward the basement. She was glad she wasn't going away again just now. This was the world where she belonged.

“We have to live where we live,” Dot said out loud to the dusty street. Then she began to think about which would be best, nasturtiums or sweet peas.

Glossary

all clear:
signal—often a siren—that danger is over

antenatal:
clinic for the purpose of treating and giving advice to pregnant women

A.R.P.:
Air Raid Precautions

barmy in the army:
slang expression for “shell shock,” a nervous condition resulting from prolonged exposure to battle conditions

bath chair:
wheel chair

bloke:
man, fellow

brougham:
one-horse carriage with the driver's seat open

bunting:
flags and similar festive decorations

chock:
block or wedge placed in front of the wheels of a vehicle to keep it from moving

cloche:
portable, translucent cover for protecting outdoor plants

cloth-ears:
deaf because of inattention

coal tit:
small, grayish bird with a dark head

demobbed:
discharged from military service

demob suit:
uniform of a discharged soldier (“demob” comes from “demobilization”)

Dick Barton, Special Agent:
character in a radio series

dosh:
money

dripping:
fat melted from roasted meat

eiderdown:
down-filled quilt

fifth columnist:
member of a group working for the enemy within a country at war; traitor

five bob:
five shillings, equal to about thirty-six cents today

flat:
apartment

flypast:
ceremonial flight, usually to celebrate victory

fortnight:
two-week period

frock:
dress

gas geyser:
gas-powered apparatus for heating water

gas mantle:
gauze covering enclosing a gas jet, which becomes incandescent when heated

grizzle:
to cry fretfully

Harry flatters:
exhausted or fast asleep

hatch:
opening in a wall, usually for serving food

hoarding:
temporary fence of light boards around a building, often covered with advertisements and flyers called bills

hooter:
horn or siren

hopping the twig:
dying; “kicking the bucket”

hot stone bottle:
ceramic bottle filled with hot water; hot-water bottle

hoyden:
girl who behaves boisterously

jumper:
sweater

just having you on:
just kidding

kip:
sleep

kit bag:
large, usually cylindrical bag for a soldier's equipment and clothing

lift:
elevator

lino:
linoleum

lorry:
truck

meat safe:
cabinet for storing meat

mews:
stables, usually with living quarters, built around a court

milk float:
vehicle for transporting milk bottles

NAAFI:
Navy Army and Air Force Institutes

nappies:
diapers

not by a long chalk:
not likely; “not by a long shot”

OHMS:
On His Majesty's Service

paper carrier:
paper bag with handles

peaky:
sickly, pale, unwell

pensione:
inn or boardinghouse

petrol:
petroleum gas; fuel

pip:
small seed of an apple, orange, grape, etc.

plane tree:
tall, spreading tree with broad leaves

pram:
baby carriage

privies:
bathrooms

queue:
line of persons awaiting their turn; also a verb meaning to wait in line

R.A.F.:
Royal Air Force

recce:
colloquial term from the word “reconnaissance,” meaning a preliminary survey of an area

roller towel:
towel with the ends joined, hung on a roller

runner bean:
a long, thin green bean

scullery:
back kitchen where dishes, etc., are washed

Shank's pony:
slang expression for walking: using one's own “shanks,” or legs, to get around

smut:
small flake of soot

spillikins:
game, also known as pickup sticks

sticking plaster:
adhesive bandage for wounds

stone:
large seed, or pit, of a plum, peach, etc.

swede:
rutabaga

ta:
slang for “thank you”

telephone box:
telephone booth

threepenny bit:
an English coin, worth very little (about two cents)

titchy:
very small

tits:
small birds

trestle table:
makeshift table, composed of a board laid across two supports

trough up:
eat heartily

trug basket:
shallow, oblong basket made of wood strips, often used by gardeners

tucking in:
another expression for eating heartily

tussock:
clump of grass

Underground:
London's underground train system, or subway

Union Jack:
national flag of the United Kingdom

Up Jenkins:
game involving manual dexterity, in which one player hides a small coin between his fingers

Very light:
flare shot from a pistol for signaling, or for temporarily illuminating part of a battlefield

vest and knickers:
undershirt and underpants

water butt:
water barrel

wireless:
radio

Henry Holt and Company, Inc.

Publishers since 1866

115 West 18th Street

New York, New York 10011

Henry Holt is a registered trademark of Henry Holt and Company, Inc.

Copyright © 1991 by Rachel Anderson

All rights reserved.

First published in the United States in 1993 by Henry Holt and Company, Inc.

Published in Canada by Fitzhenry & Whiteside Ltd.,

195 Allstate Parkway, Markham, Ontario L3R 4T8.

Originally published in Great Britain in 1991 by Oxford University Press.

eBooks may be purchased for business or promotional use. For information on bulk purchases, please contact Macmillan Corporate and Premium Sales Department by writing to [email protected].

ISBN 0-8050-2527-8

First American Edition—1993

eISBN 9781466878778

First eBook edition: July 2014