Pages of Promise (22 page)
“You have a–a wife?” Mona found this hard to say. She had thought it strange that a man as attractive as Tom would not be married, but since he had never spoken of a family, she had assumed he was not.
He looked at her, and his lips grew tight. “I did have,” he said, his voice brittle as glass. “I had a good friend, too.” He said no more, but something in the stillness of his face and the stiffness of his back spoke to Mona.
“You mean they betrayed you?”
“Yes. They ran off together.”
“Did they marry?”
“No. They meant to—but they were both killed in an automobile accident two months after they left.”
Silence filled the summer air. A flock of red-winged blackbirds argued noisily as they fluttered down into a field. Mona did not speak for some time, but then she moved closer and leaned against his arm. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I know it hurts.”
“It was some time ago,” he said stiffly.
“But the echoes are still inside you.”
Henderson turned to face her. Her lips were slightly parted, and there was compassion in her fine eyes. “You’re an understanding woman, Mona,” he said. He leaned forward and gave her what he intended to be a simple kiss, but the softness of her lips under his drew him. He reached out and drew her to him. He savored the wild taste of her lips for a moment, then he drew back. “I guess,” he said quietly, “that was my confession.”
Again Mona said, “I’m sorry, Tom.”
“We’d better get back,” he said—and it was to Mona as if the door had slammed shut. “I have to get home. Dinner will be ready.”
On Sunday, they walked in to a full church. “Carmen’s got a seat for us,” Tom whispered. They moved down the aisle, and Mona was conscious of the stares she got from people. To them she was a strange, exotic species from Los Angeles, a movie actress. She saw suspicion in some of the faces, but she merely smiled and took her seat beside Tom. He sat next to Carmen, who was wearing a bright multicolored dress made out of a thin gauze material that clung to her shapely body. It was too showy for church, but Tom knew she’d spent a lot of time picking it out.
“A new dress. It looks nice,” he said. “And the kids got new clothes, too.”
“I guess we’re celebrating.” She turned and smiled at him. She had full lips and very white teeth, and her liquid brown eyes were large and lustrous. Her eyes slipped over to Mona, who greeted her. “Hello, Carmen.”
Carmen merely nodded, and then the service started.
Richard was sitting in one of the two chairs on the platform. His eyes went over the congregation, and he braced his feet against the floor, sweat popping out on his forehead. He knew many of those packed into the little church, but still this was new territory for him. He thought,
I didn’t get this
scared in Korea when the shooting started!
After the preliminaries, Brother Crabtree rose to say, “I know we’re all praying for our young brother Richard Stuart. He’s given his life over to God, and I’ve asked him to come this morning and share his testimony and tell us anything that’s on his heart. Brother Stuart?”
Richard got up and moved stiffly to the pulpit. He fumbled with his Bible for a time until he found his text. He breathed a quick prayer, and he got a wink of encouragement and a nod from Logan. This settled him somewhat, and he began by saying, “I hope you didn’t come to hear a polished sermon because you won’t get it.”
A fly appeared, buzzing around his head, and he brushed it away, then steadied himself and said, “I want to tell you what my life has been, for a few moments anyway. . . .” He briefly told the story of his youth and referred to his service in Korea, of which he said, “Every day men died over there, and I often think of them going out to meet God. I wish,” he said slowly, “that I had been more faithful in my witness for Jesus, because, as the Scripture says, we are watchmen and are sent to warn those who do not know the Lord.
“God has called me to preach, and he’s got a big job to do to use me, but I know God can use some mighty crooked sticks.” Laughter went around and, encouraged, he said, “Now, that’s the testimony. The sermon is one you’ve heard probably a hundred times, those of you who know the Lord and have served in this church for many years. Every evangelist that comes preaches it. The pastor preaches this message constantly. I take my text this morning from the third chapter of John. What verse do you think I will center on?”
Laurel was startled when four-year-old Johnny piped up, “I know, Richard—John 3:16.”
Laughter went around again, and Richard laughed with them. “That’s right, Johnny—John 3:16. I believe you could all say it with me. ‘For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.’”
The sermon was very brief, lasting no longer than ten minutes, but as Richard spoke, something happened to Laurel. She had come eager to hear Richard preach, but she did not expect what happened. As he spoke of the love of Jesus, for the first time in her life, it came alive in her heart—the knowledge that Jesus Christ was not just someone in a book—he was different. Richard quoted another Scripture. “Ye must be born again.” He had talked to her about this before, but it had puzzled her. Even now she did not understand it, but as he preached she lowered her head, unable to meet his eyes. Her heart began to constrict, and a terrible guilt came upon her. She was frightened and wanted to get up and leave but knew that she could not.
Richard said, “I want us all to stand, and we’re going to sing a song that you know without your books. ‘Just As I Am.’ You know how it goes—
“Just as I am, without one plea,
But that Thy blood was shed for me,
And that Thou bidd’st me come to Thee,
O Lamb of God, I come! I come!
“As Billy Graham says, I’m going to ask you to get up out of your seats if you do not know Jesus. All Jesus requires is that you confess that you are a sinner. That’s all, and look to him. Ask him to save you in the name of Jesus.”
The choir began to sing and the congregation joined in. Mona felt very moved. She was shocked to see Laurel go forward, tears streaming down her face. Reverend Crabtree met her, and he sat down with her on the front seat. He was reading from his Bible to her, and Richard continued the invitation through six choruses. Others went to the front, and Mona thought,
There’s something to all this!
A longing rose in her, and she was aware that Tom, next to her, had his head bowed and his lips were moving. The impulse came to ask him to help, but she fought it down, and when the service was over and they left together in his truck, she said, “That was sweet, wasn’t it? Laurel going forward to pray.”
Tom responded, “It does something to me to see someone come to the Lord. Does it affect you that way?”
Mona could not answer. She could not meet his gaze as he turned to look at her. Quickly she looked out the window and shook her head, pressing her lips together.
“What’s wrong, Mona?”
“I don’t know, Tom. I feel so–so strange.”
He said quietly, “I think the Lord is working on you.”
“You sound like my father and mother.”
“They’re very wise people. You come from a great family.”
“I guess I’m just the black sheep.”
“We’re all black sheep, as far as God’s concerned.”
He said no more, and she turned to him and said, “Tom, I don’t know what to do. I’ve got my career to think of. I’ve worked hard to get to where I am. I can’t just give it up!”
She expected him to argue, but he was quiet for a long time. Then he said, “Mona, how many really happy people do you know in the motion picture business?”
“Why, there’s Aunt Lylah and Adam—” But then Mona ran out of names. Most of the people in her profession were unhappy, struggling to get to the top in a dog-eat-dog world, caught up in a lifestyle that no one could really admire. She did not answer further, and when he let her out, she said, “Thanks for taking me to church, Tom.”
“We’ll do it again. That’s a fine young preacher you’ve got in your family.” He drove away, and she watched the truck until it disappeared down the road. When she went in the house it seemed too quiet, and as she took off her dress and put on her faded jodhpurs and a T-shirt, she was thinking of the expression on Laurel’s face after the service. There had been a triumph there, and Mona Stuart, the movie star, envied her!
L
aurel stooped over and picked up what looked to be a weed. “Oh, this is wonderful,” she said. “I’ve looked everywhere for this!”
“What is it?”
“It’s pepperwort,” she replied, then stooped over to pick the plants, roots and all.
Bending over, Richard plucked some of the plants, asking, “What do you do with them?”
“Eat ’em! The roots are so good, real crisp and tasty.” When she was satisfied, she glanced over at a clump of another sort of plant, saying, “Look, there’s some checkerberry.” She moved over and began to pull some nodding, waxlike flowers off a small plant, explaining, “You can boil these leaves and it makes a fine tea—better than store-bought.”
“How do you know so much about plants?” Richard asked, dropping some of the stems into a small sack. As she bent to pull more of the plants, he thought how attractive a picture she made, for there was a grace in her movements that he found pleasing. She moved like a dancer, never jerky or awkwardly.
“Oh, my grandma taught me. She was an herb woman. People came from all over the hills to get her cures.”
When Laurel had her basket full of various herbs and flowers, they started back toward the house. She was silent, and her brow was creased with thought.
Richard offered, “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking—about us.”
“Oh, I didn’t know there was an ‘us.’ ” He could feel her anger.
“Of course there’s an ‘us.’ You know there is.”
She stopped in the path and turned to look him in the face. “Richard, you’ve made it clear that there is me and Johnny, and there’s you. I’m sorry I wasn’t married to his father when he was born. But I don’t regret keeping that beautiful boy. After Joe was killed, his baby was all I had. Maybe it would have been best to give Johnny up—better for me, anyway. Maybe better for him. But I couldn’t do it. I never wanted to give up my baby. I don’t know how a mother could do that.” She grew calmer. “I guess I have to look for a man who’s big enough to forgive the past and love both me and my son. I think there’s such a man. Tom says there is.” She paused and he saw tears in her eyes. “I just haven’t met him yet.”
Richard had tears in his own eyes when he said, “I’m sorry I didn’t take the news as you hoped I would, Laurel. I was shocked, and I felt confused, and I didn’t reassure you like I should have. I’m ashamed of myself. I hope you can forgive me.”
She was silent, so he continued. “I suddenly felt alive again, like I’d been dead, or half dead, at least, since I came back from Korea. What happened in church that morning changed everything. And it was the result of all that time of healing—healing my soul, my heart. And you were so much a part of that healing time. You listened when I talked, you cared even when I couldn’t talk, even when I couldn’t care. Can you forgive me, Laurel?”
Still she said nothing. He couldn’t read her face.
“I talked to Uncle Owen about it. He gave me a lot to think about. And I’ve been reading and studying the Bible. This is what I think.”
She still was quiet.
“Laurel, everybody does wrong—sins. And to God one sin is just as bad as any other. So you and I are the same—I had no right to think you having a baby out of wedlock was any worse than anything I’ve done.” He thought her face softened just a bit. “And as to you being a fit wife for a minister, well—you’re a healer, Laurel, a healer of people’s souls. You’re kind—” he made bold to push her hair back from her face, and she didn’t pull away “—and sweet and caring.” He kissed her gently. “Will you forgive me, Laurel? I’m so sorry I hurt you and made you feel disappointed and alone.”
“I don’t know, Richard. You’re confusing me. I want to be alone to think about it.”
He smiled. “I love you,” he said. “Will you marry me?”
“Yes.”
Carmen looked over where Consuela and Enrique were splashing in the creek. After lunch Tom had said, “Let’s take the kids out to the creek. It’s too pretty a day to waste.” Mona had gone back to Hollywood in the middle of the week after Richard preached, and Carmen felt relieved that she was gone.
Consuela was five, and Enrique was seven. “They’re growing up,” Carmen said wistfully.
“Consuela’s so kindhearted. And Enrique, he can’t decide whether he wants to be a star for the Yankees or fly airplanes. And he’s very protective of his little sister.” Tom was reclining, watching the children fondly. He spoke for a long time of Richard and of the service the previous Sunday. “I was glad to see Laurel make her peace with God,” he said.
Carmen murmured something. She felt uneasy, for she had been raised a Catholic and did not understand the things that went on. She said, “I do not understand this–this being born again. I was baptized when I was a baby.”
“You know that’s not enough, Carmen. There’s more to serving God than baptism.”
“Then why do you baptize and put people under the water?” She had seen a baptism and had been highly impressed, although she pretended not to be.
“Oh, a baptism is just an announcement to the world that a person belongs to Jesus Christ. That he or she is going to serve God.”
Carmen thought this over, and for some time she listened as he spoke of the Lord. It was a side of him that she could not touch. She called out, “You! Enrique and Consuela, it’s time to go.”
After the usual complaints, they put their shoes on and Enrique said, “Can we go down and see the new calf?”
“I suppose so, but then go straight to the house.”
“They sure like animals, don’t they?” Tom said. They had brought a quilt out and were sitting on it. He turned to her and said, “Are you happy, Carmen?”
Carmen watched the children disappear down the path. She knew they would stay with the calf until she went after them. She turned to him and studied his face carefully. “I am content,” she said. Then she added, “If it were not for you, Tom, I do not know where the children and I would be.” His hair had fallen over his brow, and she reached out and pushed it back from his face in a shy gesture. She let her hand linger for a moment.
