After that they lay still together, her feet dangling off the floor. Every so often he moved in her, just resting in her ass. Finally he withdrew, turned her over, and kissed her, then nuzzled her jaw with his rough cheek.
“Again,” he said.
* * *
They never did get out to dinner that night, which was fine with Wednesday. They ended up at Daniel’s house in his big whirlpool bathtub, eating takeout in the nude.
“I like this better,” she said. “Better than going out with you.”
“Do you? But I like to take you out. I like showing you off to everybody.”
“I’m just as happy here. I like this, relaxing with you.”
“Move in with me, then.”
She choked on her lo mein.
“If you like this,” he said, “move in with me. We could do this all the time. Every day. Every hour.”
Wednesday held her tongue. There was nothing she could say that wouldn’t sound mean.
All the time? I don’t think I want you taking over my life. I don’t want to always have you all over me, even though I like it once in a while
. She felt a sudden urge to run away from him, as far as she could go. Moving in?
Every day. Every hour.
“The water’s cold,” she said. “I’m getting out.”
He grabbed her ankle. His fingers felt like shackles.
“I’m cold, Daniel. Do you mind?”
“Yes, I mind. Why won’t you even consider it?”
“I will consider it. Later. You want me to move in. I get it, okay? I don’t feel like deciding right now. Is that okay with you, Master?” She said
Master
way too sarcastically, but her mouth was on overdrive. She yanked her leg again, trying to pull away, but he only tightened his grip.
Every day. Every hour. Oh my God.
“Are you in a mood, Wednesday?”
“Maybe. Can’t I be in a mood? Do I need permission from you now to be in a mood?”
“I think it’s a little provocative when you’re in a mood.”
Her answer to that was to pull away even harder, but that only seemed to drive him on. He clamped his hand around her calf like a vise.
“I’ll let go of your fucking leg when I’m good and ready, so you just simmer down and stand still.”
She crossed her arms over her chest and stared at the wall until he finally released her. She didn’t know why his offer angered her so much. She should want to move in with her lover, shouldn’t she?
She wasn’t really angry. She was afraid.
She lunged for a towel, wanting to cover herself, wanting to get away from him, but he was right behind her. She bolted, stalking into his bedroom while he followed on her heels. God, couldn’t he see she needed some fucking space? When he reached for her again, she batted his hand away. “I wish you’d stop pawing at me all the time.”
“I’ll paw every fucking inch of your body,” he said, pulling the towel away from her before she could think to grab it back. “And up inside it too if I want.”
“You’re so fucking crass. Give me the towel.”
He was on her in an instant, pushing her back on the bed. She tried to squirm away. He was still wet, his dewy bronze skin sliding across hers and his fur wet against her breasts. He tilted her chin up, but she stubbornly refused to meet his eyes.
“If you want to scrap, lover, we’ll bypass the sex and go straight to the beatdown. Is that what you want?”
“No, that’s what
you
want. I want to go home. I’m so fucking tired of your hands all over me. You’re like some hyperactive, oversexed octopus!” she yelled in his face. She tried harder to get away from him, but the harder she tried, the more firmly he held her down. His mouth was set in a stubborn line. She wasn’t going anywhere until he decided to let her.
“Shh, shh now.” He used one hand to brush back an errant lock of her hair, the tender gesture at odds with the rough way he subdued her. “Settle down before you say something you’re going to regret, baby.”
“I’m not your baby,” she said through clenched teeth.
“You’re my baby.”
“I am not!” He thought this was funny, but some guarded place in her heart felt threatened. “Let me go! I don’t want to play these fucking games.”
“I’m not into
play
, Wednesday. You know that.”
“I’m serious. I’m not in the mood for this tonight! Don’t you understand that?”
He was obscenely hard by this point. He pressed his raging erection against the juncture of her thighs, and she hated the surge of hotness that flooded her pussy.
“What are you in the mood for, then, lover?” His voice was a silken threat. He knew. Damn it. He knew that even now she wanted him, that he could take her and subdue her with just the authoritative tone of his voice. She tried to press her legs together, but he nudged them back apart.
“I think you’re in the mood for a really degrading, nasty, cathartic fuck,” he whispered. “The kind of fuck where you can’t face yourself in the mirror afterward, but you feel a whole lot better.”
“I am not!”
“I think you are, and I’m not too fond of the lying.”
“I’m not lying. Let go of me.”
“Shut your fucking mouth and spread your legs. Spread your legs wide-open for me.”
“No!”
“Do it. Obey me.”
She looked up at him finally, right into his eyes, and what she saw stilled her for a moment. Understanding wrapped in challenge, wrapped in love. She was burning up for him. She loved him. She hated him. It suddenly seemed important to fight him, to fight the part of herself that wanted what he offered.
He was her dominant. She was his submissive.
I’m afraid. I’m afraid. I want you, but I’m afraid. Don’t you see that
? She bared her teeth and narrowed her eyes. Fight or flight.
“If you want me to spread my legs, you’re going to have to make me.”
He made a guttural sound that almost made her fly right then and there. He started to tussle with her, but it was like a lion toying with a mouse. She put up a hard fight, but all he did was restrain her. She got her thighs locked together, though, no small victory, and she landed a few good slaps and one knee that came dangerously close to his jewels. He let her go at that point, and she took off. She heard him chuckle softly behind her. He thought he would have her. Maybe he would. Maybe she wanted him to.
She bolted down the hall to the spare room with him at her heels. She slammed the door and locked it a half second before he arrived. For a full minute she heard nothing but the rasp of her breath.
Every day. Every hour.
“Wednesday, you have ten seconds to unlock this door before you get the thrashing of your life.”
“Go away!” she screamed at the barrier between them. He cursed once, then she heard only silence. Too late, she remembered the adjoining bathroom, which she hadn’t thought to lock. She yelped as he descended on her and pinned her arms roughly behind her back.
“You never, ever run from me, do you understand? You never lock me out. Never.”
She struggled to pull away from him. “You think you can have whatever you want, whenever you ask, at once. You think you own me!”
“I do own you. That’s not in question. You’re mine like water is wet, you little fuck.” He turned her, not letting go of her hands, and kissed her. She resisted, then she bit him. His controlled veneer snapped.
“I fucking warned you about the biting!” he yelled, pushing her away. “You fucking lie down on the bed!”
“No!”
“Do it, or I’ll make you.”
“No!” He dragged her to the bed. She kicked and screamed, her ears ringing from her protests. “Let me go! Stop it, Daniel. I mean it!” He pushed her down, and she fought him like a wild thing. “I won’t love you anymore if you do this. I won’t love you anymore!”
He pinned her with the weight of his body, stealing her breath. He dragged her hands over her head and held them there.
I’m afraid. Don’t let me go
. She was terrified he would give up on her and give her the distance she fought for. She chanced a look at him, almost too afraid to see what he thought.
Please understand me. I want this, but I don’t want this. I want you, but I’m scared.
He tightened his hands on her wrists, his gaze never leaving hers.
“You’re mine, Wed. I’m sorry you don’t like it sometimes. But what’s true is true.”
She moaned. “Daniel…”
He loved her. There was no other message to glean from his eyes. She pressed against him miserably, and he nuzzled her as she went passive and limp under him. When he let go of her arms, she wrapped them around his neck like a drowning girl. Hot tears fell on her cheeks, tears she hadn’t even been aware of.
“Shh, okay. It’s okay.” He soothed her, dropping intermittent kisses on her lips, her ears, her neck, her tear-streaked cheeks. She could feel her tension and wildness ebbing away as he drew her close. “Okay, Wed, I’ve got you. Everything’s okay now.”
“It’s not okay,” she sobbed.
“It is okay, baby. Look at me.”
“No!”
“Look at me.”
“I don’t want to.”
“Why not?”
“I…I can’t.”
“Why can’t you?”
“Because…because I don’t know. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
“Nothing’s wrong with you, Wed. Nothing’s wrong with you, except that you’re really afraid of intimacy. Like, phobia afraid.” He slowly parted her legs. “But it’s okay. We’re working on it, aren’t we? Yes, that’s a good girl.”
She shook her head, even as she buried her face in his neck and pulled him closer. The warm, familiar scent of him soothed her racing heartbeat to a plodding ache.
Don’t let go of me. Please. Please. Please.
“That’s better,” he said. “Don’t fight me. It’s so much easier if you don’t fight me.” He traced over her stilled, conquered body, drawing delicious lines of warmth all over. He was casting a net, and she was caught in it. He moved his hand lower to cup her pussy. “Wed, I know exactly what’s wrong.”
“You don’t.”
“Yes, I do. You get afraid sometimes that if you let yourself love me, you’ll end up hurt again.”
“No,” she moaned. “No. Maybe.”
“That I won’t be there when you need me to take care of you. That I won’t love you back. I know you really, really want to protect yourself. But don’t you get tired of worrying about it all the time?”
She shook her head, shuddering in his arms.
“I’ll always take care of you, Wednesday. I love you. Always. Who’s in charge of you, Wed?”
“You are,” she whispered after a long pause.
“Yes, I am. I’m going to fuck you now, because you belong to me, and I love you very much. Put your arms around me and hold on tight, because I’m going to fuck you and remind you that you’re mine.”
She shivered as he nudged inside her. She was still crying. She cried because he was right about all of it. He knew her, everything about her, for all she tried to hide it.
“Who loves you, Wed?”
Slippery, slow strokes and his whole body covering hers.
“You do. You.”
“Yes, I love you.”
She still fought him as he fucked her. She could feel the vitality of his dominance in his grunts and sighs, in his straining muscles. He fucked her until she shook from the fervor of connection, until her nails dug into his fingers where he held her hands. Her orgasm was a gradual build that racked her when it came, endless, enveloping joy that wasn’t just her pelvis, her clit, her pussy contracting. It was all of Daniel sliding over her and loving her with complete abandon and courage. When she heard him moan and sigh, she squeezed her pussy around his length, wanting to milk him and contain him. She pressed against him while he pounded in her and came hard.