Overcoming Fear (Growing Pains #2) (40 page)

Briefly Krista wondered if he thought
watching her squirm in sexual frustration was funny. She moved away
somewhat, not giving him the pleasure.

She told him about her parents.

“That’s random,” he said, moving closer
again. She moved away.

“Yeah. It was fun for a while, but c’mon,
diving school? I had to give it up. Kids were making fun of
me.”

“I bet they don’t now when they see you
dive, though, huh?”

“No.”

“Show me.”

She smiled and got out of the pool. She
liked showing off her diving ability. It was such a rare thing that
it made her unique at pool parties. And more interesting. You
couldn’t beat that.

She went through her gambit, even doing the
two she wasn’t great at. Sean watched every movement, watching her
body as she moved and arched.

When she was done, Sean clapped.

“Wonderful work, Marshall.”

“Thanks.”

They swam around each other for a while,
exchanging a few words, but mostly just enjoying the water and each
other’s company. It was back to being easy again. They didn’t have
to talk if they didn’t want to. But if they did, and there was
never any lack of something to say.

When Krista’s fingers got as wrinkled as an
old man’s balls, she had to face the music. If she didn’t get out
soon she might develop some weird kind of soggy finger fungus.

When she righted herself out of her stalling
float, filled with regret and sadness to say goodbye, Sean was
treading water, looking at her. His eyes were absorbed.

“Krista,” he said when their eyes met. “Did
you mean everything you said last night?”

“I said a bunch of stuff, but yes,
everything I said was true. And I meant it.”

He swam closer. “You love me?” He said it
quietly, almost to himself. It was as if he didn’t believe it.

Krista got a tingling in
her groin. Not from arousal, this time, but from uncertainty,
bordering on fear. She really,
really
didn’t want him to use that
as a platform to tell her how wrong he was for her. Or how wrong
she was to love him. But she wouldn’t sell herself short. She was
in this far, so she would go the distance.

“Yes.” She matched his quiet tone.

He swam closer. “I love you, too. It scares
me shitless. I’m scared I might hurt you. Or I might freak out. I’m
scared of what it means, or where we might go, but I love you. And
this last week has been torture. Seeing you hurting has been worse
than torture. Can you forgive me? Can you give me another
chance?”

He was right next to her now. She swam to
the edge of the pool and he followed. She let him get about a foot
away before she answered. “What if you have a bad episode and push
me away again? Or what if you have a bad episode and we have sex
and you feel guilty or something? I can’t do the on-again-off-again
thing with you, Sean.”

“You said pushing you away
was protecting myself, and you’re right for the most part. I know
that I won’t physically hurt you.
Ever.
But sometimes I might be in a
place where I need alone time to work it out. Sometimes I need to
push everyone away.”

“But will you let me back in when you’re
done?”

“Yes.”

“What if
I
freak out?” she
whispered, tears coming quickly to her eyes. “What if I wake up in
a tangle of your arms and sheets and think you--and remember bad
things. What if I need some alone time? Or I need you to hold
me?”

He gently pulled her toward him and kissed
her tears. “Then I’ll do whatever you need. I’m not all that
breakable, either, Krista. Except when you aren’t around, then I’m
glass.”

They were quiet for a moment, their bodies
pressed together, he giving her soft kisses that made her heart
flutter.

“Marcus told me what you said to him and
Judy,” Krista said quietly, enjoying his strong arms wrapped around
her and his hard length pressed up against her hip, heavy and
insistent.

Sean backed away slightly so he could look
her in the eyes. His eyes were so deep they could be portals into
another galaxy. “Busted. And yet, here you are.”

“That was a pretty ballsy thing to say to
your team members. To the biggest gossips in the company, no
less.”

“Yes, but it was me that they would gossip
about, not you. I’m no stranger to gossip. I didn’t want that for
you.”

“Oh, there is plenty of gossip about me; it
just isn’t in the emotional arena.”

Sean’s eyes crinkled as he smiled. “We need
to talk about that. And other work-related things. But first, we
need to get out of the water. I am turning into a prune.”

Krista kissed him then, slow and deep. Her
tongue entered his mouth and stroked and tasted. She let her hand
trail down his hard body, then dip into his swim trunks. She found
his erection and stroked it firmly, thankful no one else was in the
pool area.

Chapter Twenty-Seven

“Should...get out.” Sean breathed into her
ear with a rush of passion. His hands were squeezing her butt
cheeks to him, anxious to get inside of her suit, but facing the
hotel pool entrance so they didn’t advertise too overtly what they
were up to.

Krista softly chuckled and drifted back from
the wall away from him. “If you say so.”

He swam at her slowly, his body at home in
the water. After Krista got out she wrapped a towel around herself,
she watched him climb from the pool with eyes on fire. She wanted
him to rip her towel and suit off and take her, but something told
her he would make it slow and torturous.

She had a feeling it would be just as
beneficial.

As he stood from the edge of the pool, water
making rivulets down his mouth watering abs, Krista took two steps,
and melted into his body. She found his mouth again. His erection
pressed against her, and he bent and angled so it hit exactly the
right place. She moaned and arched, letting him kiss her neck and
run a large, calloused hand over her breast, his thumb tracing her
hard nipple.

“We should go upstairs,” she said and Sean’s
hands slipped into her bathing suit to get closer acquainted with
her breast.

“You are so beautiful it makes my mouth
water. I couldn’t keep my eyes off you at that pool party today. It
was pissing off my groupies. And yours.”

“If I wasn’t surrounded by a pubescent
sausage fest every time I sat down I would have gawked at you, too.
Living in the bog land I don’t get to see you enough when you’re
naked.”

“We can fix that.”

“But, in public. Up close is good, but from
a distance is nice, too.”

“Then we’ll have to take a few weekends
away, won’t we?” Sean said as he wrapped a towel around himself and
looked at her with his perfect smile.

They headed to the room, neither slow nor
fast, but as they got closer suddenly Krista got nervous. She
wondered if the sex ban was still in effect. She kind of hoped it
was just because it was what she knew. It had been a while since
she’d had sex, and even though they had done everything but, she
was still questioning her prowess. She was also questioning letting
herself lose control. She had always had free abandon with sexual
matters--it felt better when you surrendered to it—but that went
very wrong with Jim, and she was nervous she might get some dark
spots with Sean.

They reached the room, got inside, and Sean
immediately wrapped her in his arms. He wasn’t being the passionate
man from downstairs. His tune had changed. She backed off to see
why.

“Are you okay?” Sean asked quietly.

She could see he was worried. She didn’t
know if he was reacting to her cues, or having some of his own.
They were two messed-up individuals.

“With you, yeah. I’m just... I’ve had some
bad experiences—as you know. I’m just a little worried I might
crack up when I try to... I don’t know... let go, you know? I’m
just scared I might freak out. A little. And that’s not fair to
you.”

“But we’ve been together quite a few times
and you’ve been okay. I mean, except for my episodes.”

“Yes, but I had to stay in control to make
sure we didn’t lapse into sex.”

“We can still keep that rule if that’s what
it takes.”

“Terrible idea.”

Sean laughed as he led her into the
bathroom, kissed her head tenderly, and took off her towel and his.
He turned on the shower and then turned back to her. “Let’s have a
relaxing shower, get the chlorine off us, and see how we feel.”

“Okay Dr. Ruth.”

Sean just smiled. “You’ve... this might seem
indelicate of me, but you’ve had sex after your ex, right?”

“Yeah, I have. You remember Paul...”

“Hmm,” that sound had a little animosity in
it.

“But I...okay, this is going to sound really
shallow, but a bunch of the time with Paul I was imagining myself
with you.” Krista started to fidget. “But I never really let myself
lose control because...well...he wasn’t all that inspiring, I guess
you could say.”

As the bathroom steamed up, Krista kept her
focus on the shower in utter embarrassment. When the silence
lengthened, she peeked at Sean from under her eyelashes. His smile
was one of triumph.

“Oh, don’t go getting your ego all huge or
anything!” she said to him as she looked away again.

“I was so jealous the night of the wine
dinner. When he was waiting for you.” Sean gently removed her
bathing suit top. He focused on her breasts for a moment before he
looked back up and met her eyes. The corners of his mouth curved
into a delicate smile.

“Jealous for all of two
seconds until you had your
friend
naked?” Krista countered.

“Everyone else was getting some, why am I
the only one pointed out?”

“Because it was with
her.”

Sean just shrugged as he bent down to strip
off her bottoms. She steadied herself on his big shoulder and
watched his back coil and relax as he moved. It occurred to her
that he was treating her like a patient. He had his kid gloves on
and was handling her with care. She didn’t need this slow treatment
to get herself back on track, but it touched her, so she went with
it.

“She lost at her own game,” he said as he
stripped off his trunks. He was still hard, his size was just shy
of daunting. His desire was smoldering under a tight cap. He would
stay in control until he was sure she was ready. It was exciting
and touching and endearing all at the same time.

“I just can’t believe no one else got you
already,” Krista said slowly, leaning into his body. “How did I get
so lucky?”

“You were the only one in a long time who
not only saw past my bullshit, but called me on it. And while I
would love to kill your ex for what he did to you, I do have to
thank him for screwing up royally so you would leave and find me.
Then beat me into submission!” Sean was smiling and kissed her
lightly on the lips, not letting her deepen the kiss. Instead he
backed off and shooed her into the shower.

Rivulets of steam were rising off of the
water. Krista got under the warm spray and sighed in satisfaction.
You just couldn’t beat a hot shower. Sean came in after her and put
his arms around her, half to get close, half to get in the
water.

“Do you have shampoo and conditioner?” he
asked.

“I actually forgot it. The hotel does,
though.”

He nodded, looked around and not seeing it,
ducked out of the shower and was quickly back in with goose pimples
from the change in temperature. Krista took the bottles and let him
get solidly in the water. His erection had started to recede so she
ran her hand up and down his chest lightly. That was all it
took.

He smiled as he reached for her. “Here I am
trying to be good, and you are trying to tease me,” he said,
running his hand over her nipple.

Krista gasped as sparklers went off in her
pubic region from the ministrations of his thumb. Swollen and
needy, she slid a hand up his chest and moved closer, pushing her
body against his erection.

“Patience,
Pet
,” Sean said with his
secret smile.

Sean leaned down to touch his lips to hers,
softly, sweetly. After he shampooed and conditioned her, he did his
own, having to inform her that women did not wash the hair of
men.

“Is that another rule in the man-code book?”
Krista asked with a smile, grabbing for the bar of soap. “You can’t
let a chick wash your hair? How dumb is that?”

“Shows weakness.”

Krista laughed at him, lathering her hands.
“No it doesn’t! I bet it is man-code because women are shorter and
men got worried about having to bend over in the shower. That’s
what I’d bet!”

~*~*~*~

Sean laughed and shrugged, eyeing her as she
approached. He loved the heat in her eyes; the desire. He loved
being on the other end of it. A thrill of anticipation shocked
through him. He would let her take the lead this time, excited that
he didn’t have to stop her. He had a feeling he was in for a wild
ride, and nothing could tear him away from it.

“I don’t have to be worried that you are now
coming at me with soap, right?” he asked with a chuckle.

“I will clean you, man-code be damned.”

“Oh, you can clean the body. That’s okay.
Just not the hair.”

“So stupid,” Krista said with a smile,
putting her hands on his chest.

Sean rested his hands on her hips, feeling
her hands cover every inch of his body. He didn’t mind that she
washed his upper body three times, or that she made him turn around
to make sure his butt cheeks were good and lathered up. He loved
the slow rinse, her little hands making sure every bubble had been
washed away. Then, when she scooted up to him, her hands on his
shoulders, and wiggled his cock down toward the break in her legs,
he stopped being able to think at all. He closed his eyes in
rapture, letting her play, and feeling himself pushed into the
space in her upper thighs right against her slippery slit.